Meditation

You have 20 Minutes to explain why you did not meditate before you replied to this quality thread.

Aum.

I don't know how

I tried but I keep hearing voices

no point

Meditation is boring

This. So boring. I'd rather read.

Meditation is a sham. If you think it works then you're just delusional and you need to reevaluate your life.

Positive effects on cognition and well-being are now documented fact. It's not mumbo-jumbo anymore senpai.

I partook in meditation this morning after praying. I do it in the shower. It is an opportunity to humble/center myself, quiet my mind, begin to focus on what I do. After I pray and meditate in the shower, I let the water baptize me and I am clean from my sins and shortcomings of yesterday.

I'm atheist btw

What did you pray to?

idk lol

because its a waste of time

search guided meditation on youtube to get started

Been meditating twice a day for 31 days straight you fag

Our lord and savior Jesus Christ

Kek Invictus

...

Hhhhhhhmmmmmmmaaaaaaaa

Plebs, leave this board now and forever.

I've tried meditating. I LITERALLY can't because of my fucking stupid intolerant bastard family

>took up meditating about 3 months ago
>really helped anxiety and stress of which I experiance a lot
>parents find it fucking HILARIOUS
>buy a bunch of solar powered 'nodding Buddha' toys
>line the windows of the house with them
>put a drawing of a solar panel in my room
>whenever I meditate they shout 'HE IS DRAWING HIS POWER FROM THE SUN BUDDHAS'
>dad says 'you are less like the Dalai Lama and more like the Delayed Puberty' in ref to my lack of body hair

Pricks fuck this place

>>dad says 'you are less like the Dalai Lama and more like the Delayed Puberty' in ref to my lack of body hair

Ask him if you're his real son? Suggest a DNA test based on you not taking after him.

If you're worried you will sound like an idiot taking comebacks from someone on the internet take the next step and go ahead and actually buy one of the DNA test kits and see if he wants to take you up on that go bring it into the living room table during dinner and say you're serious. Start pointing out your eye colors are different, ear lobes etc...

Meditate during the next 3-6 hours of shouting in your family home and brace for the divorce.

When it calms down tell your father it's OK. You wont respect him any less for being a cuckold. But only because you couldn't respect him any less anyway. (Make sure you have 6-12 months rent saved up too big boy.)

I had to take a shit.
Also i don't like reddit memes.

d-did they seriously change the face to wojak? for fucks sake

>Aum
its Om kek
faggot kys

i tried it once
>sit down in quiet
>i can hear myself breathing
>its relaxing and a bit awkward at the same time
>my leg starts hurting
>i have to take a fart
>BRAAAP
>have to get up to open the fucking window
>lost my motivation half way through

>U R not evn my reel dad fgt

That's weird, I did a professional development workshop today and the facilitator had that same frog statue at her workstation.
Also it's om, not aum.

Germany? They sell it at Tchibo

dumbfuck it is an indian word you can spell it aum

Actually it's a transliteration of the original 'om'. They are both acceptable. Read a book nigga.

How do you stay focused while meditating?

>they shout 'HE IS DRAWING HIS POWER FROM THE SUN BUDDHAS'

kek, just suck it up op, that sounds hilarious

That is the point to get pass the boredom.

troll harder.
Legit and works.

nope

Green tea
Cannabis

What different kinds of meditations does anons do?

Because I can only go for about 5 minutes before my mind gets very bored and can't focus

i dont have autism

>he posted on Veeky Forums