You are teleported back to Medieval times

You keep your current gains, height, weight, abilities and knowledge....How fucked are you?.

Other urls found in this thread:

gutenberg.org/files/86/86-h/86-h.htm
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

A I can't even pretend to be a guy because face too fem and whr. I'd be fucked. Best chance would be marry a knight me maybe. In my head id like to think id go out Joan of arc style though

I tell the local blacksmith to build me some Gym equipment

I go to my native city of Madrid and become friends with the Spanish king

Die due to war, the pest or syphillis most probably.

Probably die of the cold no matter what because I live in fucking Scandinavia.

>tfw wizard

I would start an entreprise

with my knowledge i'd be able to survive alright

the biggest problem would be not being able to communicate with anyone

>be in middleage with current gains, height, Weight, knowledge
>hungry
>Ask some weirdo where next supermarkt is
>He looks at me confused, whatever
>Decide to get some mcd
>Put hands into pocket to get smartphone to find closest restaurant
>where's my smartphone
>where's my pocket
>where's my sweatpants
>Die off starvation

>realise I've got 21st century scientific knowledge and spreading it would boost development
>teach local people the shit i know
>people start to praise me
>at some point inquisition sets me aflame

t-thanks italy

Become the kings medical advisor because I'm basically a doctor thanks to all my years on webmd. Use gold to build gym equipment and get jooocy off naturally grown animals and vegetables. Become kings war advisor because I'm basically special forces thanks to all my gorilla warfare tactics on call of duty.
In all honesty I'd probably die the first week by getting the common cold.

You guys tell me

>6'6
>250
>speak English, Spanish, Italian and French fluently

Well for starters, trained humans today are naturally stronger and faster than they were during those times.

You'd get raped by drunken dwarves and killed immediately after

medfag here, I'd probably do fine

>I'm taller than everyone
>Have a peculiar accent
>Have perfect knowledge of who wins which wars and how to treat and prevent common diseases

Literally just became a fucking wizard for real. I'll be fine, OP.

>>speak English, Spanish, Italian and French fluently

yeah but how different were those languages back then? you probably wouldn't understand a thing

>be hispanic
>before the age of discovery

So...do I just stop existing? I'm too white to go hang with the natives but fuck catholic spain.

Good luck not getting inquisitioned

well, i'd do pretty good on fist fights, i'm boxing for 5 years now and i'm fit enough, but with swords and bows and arrows i'd be fucked

True

LONDON
O
N
D
O
N

well, he would be probably better than most of us.

Plague.

I would be ok with my spear head barbell attachment.

Aren't we immune to it?

french is completely unchanged.

What specific time period though? Medieval times are from the 5th to 15th century. If ~~5th then enlist in the byzantine army under Justinian and kill mudslimes, become high ranking officer cause of gains and military experience, become adviser to justinian and uphold the glory of the eastern roman empire. Truly the best timeline. If 15th die cause otomans and all that.

No, look up herd immunity. You'd be resistant to it and your chances WOULD probably be better, but you can still get it.

If anything you'd cause people around you to die though.

Do you really though? I somehow doubt you could put together any kind of modern technology from scratch unless you're a gifted engineer. Modern tech requires study and specialization to reproduce.

Become a healslut

Do I get sent back to the exact same spot back in time? Because I'm in a really tall building right now. I need these important questions answered.

you'd be in space actually cause of the movement of the sun through space

Utilize my STEM degree and take over the kingdom

You retards do realize that an actual novel was written about this well over 100 years ago, yes? Or are you all drooling illiterates

He didn't say modern technology, he said modern scientific knowledge. He could spread what he know of scientific principles, mathematical principals, and many of those things.

Kill everyone with my super plague. Diseases are more dangerous now not the other way

average height for men back then was like 5'7 so Id finally get to expierence what is it like to be a tall guy. seems nice desu

I'd be the big guy at 5'9" at 155 lbs because everyone else were skeletal manlets
also i'll work my way up as a knight then as a combat instructor

>6'4 240lbs, 4 years lifting
I'd be considered about losing my gains. Would find a job doing some kind of bodyguard work maybe, or a bouncer or something for some noble. Then I'd use my money to pay a blacksmith for a shitty barbell and some plates.

Would be better than nothing. Shouldn't be too expensive for a long steel rod and wheels but it may take me months to possibly save up.

What one? There are a ton of time travel or back in time shit.

>6'4"
>White scandinavian
>big guy by normie standards
>dated a horse crazy girl, so I know how to ride.
>did some amateur archery with homemade bows as a kid.

I would definitely sign up for the crusades and go kill filthy sandniggers and rape their women.

DEUS VULT!

Oh shit i haven't considered that training legs would be basically impossible without a strong barbell. That's why most of those marble statues have twink legs I guess.

No stirrups until way later though

High school science would probably blow their minds but I don't remember shit so I'd be as useless then as I am now

If I got two hours to prep I'd learn how to make basic gunpowder. If I can make guns I become rich

>I'm basically a doctor thanks to all my years on webmd.
>it's cancer your majesty
>what is cancer serf?

can't believe it took 40 shit answers before this was posted. It just proves that Veeky Forums is full of incel cucks.

the first one, genius

gutenberg.org/files/86/86-h/86-h.htm

>actually incredibly hilarious
>Loled multiple times on Amtrak reading this
>ppl thought I was high

>dated a horse crazy girl, so I know how to ride.
No you don't.

i know cause of my chinese cartoons m8. you need saltpeter gunpowder and charcoal if i remember correctly. saltpeter you can make from piss and shit festering for months. sulfur is easy as piss to find, so you'd just need to experiment on the amount of stuff you'd put to make the gunpowder.

Native American here id be living with them so id be hunting buffalo and teaching them basic farming techniques

>look guys, don't trust these pale dudes right. They ain't gonna do you no favors.

just kill a spare horse and make some out of it's skin.

>tfw serfdom forever

Spotted the lonely autist that lives in front of his computer.

You being there affects the outcomes of all wars.

I learned that watching Taboo but the "how much stuff do I mix not to die" is what I'm concerned about

But now that I think about it I know that it's good to boil your medical instruments which would save a lot of lives so even this basic shit could make me valuable to whichever kingdom I happen to be in

potentially

>be 5'11
>butt of all kinds of jokes
>average male height back then was 5'7
>mfw

I get to be the bully now.

Oh god this projecting faggot. You don't gain the knowledge and skills of people you date. Not only that I've been riding since child. I know the ins and outs.

true i forgot that those retards bled themselves to make em better so the most basic medical knowledge would be a godsend

in a multiverse theory yeah, but in a singular linear timeline/universe no

don't you even dbz

>get wounded
>go to local healer
>"yeah just rub some horseshit in it and walk it off"

Just imagine how mind-blowing would be for these people to suddenly spot a tall, light-skinned and well nourished male wearing odd clothes in a middle of nowhere.

""pay"" some stupid peasant to do it for you

Depends which time travel theory you follow.

It could also be that user was always transferred to the past and the events unfold the way they did because of him. No matter what he does in the past doesnt affect the future

>wearing odd clothes
No one promised clothes.

Sure. All commoners get to meet the king.

itd be some ancient aliums shit bro

They'll think the logo of my adidas tracksuit is a magic glyph that gives me knowledge.

Pull a Cortez and claim to be their god.

I'll be just fine. I'm 6'5, 152Ibs, do parkour, and am smarter than medieval brainlets who still believe in gods. I'll just wear light clothing and dual wield daggers and use my agility to be a rouge like warrior in the battles against muslims

...

>portugal
>best timeline
>rule the fucking world
>it's all gone now
Bloody hell, I want those glorious times.

I fantasize about being transported back to medieval times more than I'd like to admit. With my modern day knowledge, I help the people overthrow the aristocracy of England and then found a new meritocratic order with myself at its apex. To improve the population, I make sure that everyone has access to a basic education, food, and healthcare. Absentee ownership of land is abolished so that farmers are in full control of what they produce and the best citizens are encouraged to have the most children. While I'm tolerant of all religions, I will try to get my people to adopt a new belief system I create that is a rip off of Nietzsche's work. After consolidating my power and winning the full support of the population, I begin my war to unite the people of the Northwestern Europe into one realm. It would include all of the Germanic peoples and probably what's left of the Celts as well. After uniting my people, I do what I can to help whatever threat arrives at Europe's doorstep, whether that be Mongols, Muslims, or Memes. While I'd like to encourage global exploration, I'd prefer to not accidentally wipe out millions of people so I'm not sure what to do there. Australia was sparsely populated at this time, wasn't it? I'd probably send people to settle there peacefully. Before I die, I make it clear to my people that some day there will be no need for a state and we can all live in a beautiful, classless utopia where we no longer fight amongst one another but still retain our identities. It will sound impossible to them but many centuries later, once technology has allowed for it, I hope my words inspire my people to move beyond hierarchy.

>2017
>actually 1317
>not being The Boss
get on my level

>abundant facial hair
>scottish
>5'7

I'll do just fine alongside my dwarven brethren.

>black plague

Let me tell you, Spanish is kind of rough.

I've read ye olde Spanish. It's different

Idk about Old Spanish but Old English is the most beautiful language I've ever heard.

there arent that many of (them) at that point and you could easily rally everyone against them for good if you could prove you were from the future, save the future user

I'm mediocre at best but I can teach the basics of electricity, petroleum destillation and internal combustion engines to some of those very intelligent dudes that could improve/build them

Id probaly start by either selling the fine clothes Im wearing made by a material so rare nnone has ever seen it before(polyester) to get my self some starting cash altenatively I might pose as some healer from far far awaymy bookeeping skills might come in handy

>be me, Shroomknob Pete
>minding my own business, dying of the plague and shit
>on my way to the local whore to wish her a happy mother's day
>suddenly a giant appears from the sky, dressed like the king's fool
>runs towards me
>talks strange, probably a Sarasin
>same skin color
>"where da whey at?" "hit ma makros"
>tell him to fuck off
>runs to the nearest bull and starts sucking his dick
>"GOMAD"
>thefuckamIwatching.tapestry
>repeatedly lifts a pig above his head
>"DYEL"
>runs away as quickly as he appeared
>go tell the local priest
>burns me at the stake for summoning the devil
>mfw

>6'3
>230

tfw when eastern europe nobleman with crests and shit

go war maybe? become hussar if lucky

>implying this isn't the cure for cancer
Homeopathic medicine is superior

I don't like the idea of getting everyone to rally against them. That sounds more like you're moving the problem than it sounds like solving it. Instead, I'd try to carve out a state for the Jews early on. Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with them being in my country as long as they're decent people but I recognize that their presence in Europe will lead to a lot of suffering for both Jews and Europeans so I think it'd be for the best if we gave them their own country before the worst happens.

>Be in Australia
>White
Probably after much struggle eaten by aboriginals or killed by wildlife

5'9 and 230. I'd be a brute on the battlefield physically, but I don't think my cushy American upbringing would make it easy for me to mentally adapt to such harsh conditions.

>Merican
>Get either killed by, or accepted into indian tribes
>fuck sloots, hang out with a tribe that allows polygamy
>break glasses
>die of starvation

Would we be completely naked too?

nah breh, this is chaos theory we're talking about

Racist

You got it wrong

>write everything about physics and stuff
>write about calculus
>make a copy of the book and gift them to the monks
>make another copy of it and set it to the papacy
>live in england for the rest of your life

>i appear in argentina
Either eventually be killed by injuns, join them or make my way to the sea and make a giant statue for the spanish explorers to see and come help me
I would also try to leave what I know of modern literature and events written in stone so someone finds them and gets spooped out

MsC in international business, officer training and speak 4 languages.

I think I'd join one of the large merchant enterprises of the British empire.

>is chaos theory
m8 have you ever even seen Jurassic Park?

chaos theory has nothing to do with divergent and convergent timelines.

Become grossly incandescent

audibly keked

I actually read a book like this, where the guy was sent back to ancient rome. Basically he invented brandy and became rich as fuck and I think he married a qt too