How you holding up /fit?

How you holding up /fit?

lowest weight I've been at in a while with the lowest BF I've ever had so feeling pretty good about that

6'4" 209, 13%, started at 260 a few years ago unable to do a single pullup, now I'm repping good/excellent on the Secret Service qualification tests

>fucking 5 a.m
>havent showered in like 5 days
>haven't talked to my mom for two days even though I live at home
>got mad at her two days ago after she made fun of me going to a psychiatrist
>flipped the living room table and smashed a chair against the wall
>now we both ignore eachother and it's super weird
Has anyone else been in this situation?

Oh, add to that: almost hit a 5pl8 deadlift so that's nice

move out a.s.a.p.
your life depends on it.
Good luck, user. we love you.

Other than having a constant crippling existential crisis and some dissociative moments, pretty good. My brain can't fucking slow down, it's tiring, I'm constantly thinking about the future.

i just want to buy a gun so i can tease the trigger as i force the muzzle into the temple of my head

its been a year and i still cant get over her

ive been lifting for around 14/15 months and i still look small as fuck

im in law school but i absolutely hate it
but i dont know what else i would do

im on 3 medications for my depression, two are SSRIs i believe, and the last one is an anti-psychotic

i got an increasing pile of shit i need to do but i can barely get myself to give a fuck

...

Yo you can't kill yourself over a girl, that's not a valid reason

thanks for your concern
ive been wanting to kill myself for a while, not because of a girl
although not being able to get over this girl isnt helping either

i just want to check out, you know?
>thanks for the game, i tried, don't quite like it, can i turn off the console now?

Kind of my mom found a huge stash of drugs I had in my hamper two days ago.

We have been avoiding each other and can't even make eye contact.

Why won't she just bring it up lads?! It's to flip for cash mom! Your baby boy isn't a junkie. I swear! T___T

>k-kill me

Dude leave law school, it's killing you. I guarantee you don't need all those meds once you leave

Correct

Learn how to control your emotions, and move out as soon as you can.

Last thing you want is to let your bitchy attitude hurt the people you care about.

Holy shit, I'm in the same position. I feel like my mom is sabotaging me. The worst thing is that I can't move out because I'm currently NEET.

Yeah but when you shut off the console you can go do something else.

You careened through billions of years of evolution and fought your way into your mothers womb just to pussy out when you got to a shitty level / miniboss? At least finish the game and figure out your score before you drift back into the eternal nothing

>excited to hit 2pl8 squat today
>get to the gym all hyped
>warm up, hit first work set
>second set, stall on first rep
>try again, still stall
>OHP and cleans follow this, and I have been stuck on them for weeks
>consider going home right then and there
>fuck that
>end up hitting both OHP and cleans PR
I really wish I hit 2pl8, but I'm really proud of myself and hyped to try again Friday. Never give up, bros.

im almost done though...
and im so afraid, terribly afraid that my problems will come with me once i leave

my therapists and psychiatrist think law school is a big factor in my depression

but i still have lingering doubts that if i leave all that will happen is im depressed somewhere else

thanks user, i will try a little more
biggest thing keeping me in the game right now is lifting desu
>still trying to hit that natty limit
>why is natty progress so slow
>when will i finally make it

>feinted due to what proved to be a panic attack and got sent to the E.R last week after my mom made fun of my OCD-related behavior
>specifically asked to be left alone
>she wakes me up, asks if I'm gonna cry and tells me 'why don't you cry out to a shrink hehe'
>fucking go apeshit
She, my dad and my older brothers were all violent when I grew up, and I haven't touched any of them since I got big. I don't feel bad for her

> its been a year and i still cant get over her

it's been three and i still can't get over mine

i know this feel user

i know this feel

I'm really out of shape. I was big once 2/3/4/5. But now I'm soft.
Just got offered an amazing job in the same city my ex/one that got away lives in.
Can't let her see me like this. Been running and lifting again, progress is slow but visible.
I'm gonna make it back. Back to 3 years ago me.

Quit bitching and eat more.

Natty progress isn't slow, you should always be seeing the amount of weight you can lift go up steadily. Physically seeing a difference will obviously take a while, that's when patience kicks in.

Don't let your depression hold you back from being badass, thats pathetic bro. Just lift through it

>easily irritable when im home
>even around family
>don't feel "comfortable" here because there's stuff cluttered everywhere
>just want to be left alone and not have anyone telling me what to do ever or yelling about stuff
>daily fantasies about just disappearing to some far off place and starting fresh as some kind of hermit

>pic related

Every day I am dragged further down into the crevasse because I have absolutely no idea how what I am is supposed to make sense.

I'm currently 15 kg down and only have another 10 kg to lose to get to my target weight. My cardio is about 4x better than when I started, I'm getting a more defined jaw, I'm so much fitter and happier when doing most of my activities it's unbelievable and I love looking more "beautiful" and aesthetically pleasing (clothes looking good on me for once is great too).

However: I'm a gay male who has a severe fat fetish and all I can think about is how the fuck I'm supposed to get a fat bf with the same fetish now, or how I'm gonna stand living with them if they're a fatass.

Why couldn't I just be a chad? I'd have made a really good normie, I see y'all on Veeky Forums all the time whining about it being too hard to get girls and whatever well I've got to say y'all got it good because at least you're into girls.

inb4 kys, don't worry, I know.

>drugs

Enjoy having lines on your face at 22 like me. Theyre fun at first, then it gets real bad real fast, stay away bro

Doing fine, OP.
Tuesdays workout sucked, but made up for it on Wednesday.
Sleeping well.
No real issues actually.

How are you holding up, OP?

Fuck man, I've fallen so far.

Gained 80 pounds in the last year and a half.

Have a good, solid job offer, though. I can move out of my mom's house again and not be surrounding by fat fucks who're filling the fridge with bullshit

I wanna be Veeky Forums again, Veeky Forums.