Okay Veeky Forums I really need your help since you're all I got

Why does everyone go on about how terrible the first time they had sex was. It's really not that hard.

Try and get her off before intercourse, not because it will let you off the hook of during intercourse but some women just seem to get them more fired up and make the whole thing more enjoyable for her. I think some it seems to just make everything too sensitive and shuts them down Hopefully though user you've managed not to get yourself a girl whos so autistic that she wouldn't tell you if that were the case.

>couldn't find the hole in missionary
>couldn't even stick it in doggystyle
Are you blind, have a micro penis, or both?

Yeah brah, just relax, stress can really block your boner. Take it as something pleasurable and exciting and dont have fear of being bad. You are virgin, she can't expect wonders from you. If you can't find the hole just ask her to navigate with her hand. Oh yeah and google clitoris location and g-spot. Just for being sure. For the Gspot - When your finger(s) are inside her with your nails facing her lower back, start doing "come here" gesture with your fingers. Enjoy yourselves. Good luck brah

The vagina is lower than you expect. I remember having boner issues, that is i couldn't get a hard on for a couple times due to embarrassment. Missionary is cool, doggie too

This
Have a lot of foreplay before you have sex, don't jump right in
Usually it should be 5-10 minutes of foreplay then ~5 minutes of sex
Don't get impatient

drink 4 beer first.

>on test/tren/mast/proviron
>I'm a virgin

I guess if I had no chance with women I'd just roid like crazy too...

that's the equvalent to "just be yourself"
it's god tier advice but hard to put in practice under pressure and also hard to figure out getting it correctly

so is brap posting finally over?

Alright new fish... Protip:

Masturbate at least 4 times before sex. That way you'll last for like 4 hours and she will be well impressed with your stamina. Girls love nothing better than a guy who can fuck for hours straight, trust me, I know.

Number 2, call her mommy a lot. Girls love knowing that you see them on a level with your own mother. What could be more sexy than that kind of validation. Guaranteed orgasms.

Lastly, do not go down on her. you have not had practice, you don't know how to do it. You'll just end up biting off her clit and girls don't really like that.

Good luck bro. You'll be slayin puss puss like me in no time.

pro tips here

Then you need to start practicing this line of thought during stressful moments in your life so you're better prepared for stuff like this.

Constantly train your mind.

"Hey user, I am feeling pretty gassy tonight. Come on over with your mouth and start licking my asshole."

"mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... oooh baby, yeah. Just like that and..."

*grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrwwwwwwwwwwwwwwllllll*

"Oh my stomach, user open your mouth."

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP

"mmmmmmmm" *eyes roll back in ecstasy* "You're such a great man, user. Doing this all for me..."

"Uh oh, here comes another barrage. OPEN UP, QUICK!!!"

*BRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOP*
*MMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEERRRRREEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP*
*BLOOP BLOOP*

"UGH, The finally user, just for my luh... love"

*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMP*

Taking the females down from their pedastal. Knowing that all the hot females can rip cheek flappers that could slap your face, what is your reason for working out now?

Because you had to say something.

>girls don't like you biting their clit
lmao ok virgin, you should be chomping that shit like a great white shark i mean really flex those canines

>5 minutes of sex

this

also take it at her pace. heres my usual order when im making love

>start making out at some point. if you havn't/ can't make out properly just move at hr pace and dont use too much tongue. having your hand firmly (don't squeeze just place it there) on her upper neck (just below the atlas) can be helpful to lead to the neck part.
>kiss down her neck, do not leave hickeys, but take long BUT NOT WET kisses to the neck, as if you were having
>while kissing her neck move your hands to her lower back/pant line, have hands be firm, but not gripping her, you may need to press lighter if you're actually Veeky Forums
>at some point you have a choice, cup her breast with on of your hands (move under shirt or over depending on the pace)
>OR slide one hand into her pants and start firmly grabbing her ass cheek, DO NOT MOVE FOR HER VAG, THIS IS FOREPLAY
>i usually go for breast and i'll explain why
>okay so were almost as 2nd base, which ever you chose before do the other (breast or cheek)
>eventually get her bra (they hook together like a train car, or watch a video on how to take a bra off)

this part should unfold in about the first 2-5 minutes

>when her breasts are exposed start kissing down form her neck to her nipple, DO NOT BITE HARD, infact biting is not recommended if you are new to a womans exposed body, you may hurt her (and she may or may not tell you), instead simply glide your teeth over her nipple, if you could tear the skin off a ripe pear its too much pressure
>NOTE YOU SHOULD BE MAKING OUT WITH HER THE WHOLE TIME, AND STILL KISSING HER NECK ETC.
>when you are doing nipple play its important to hav yoru hands doing something. I usually have 1 hand on her other breast and cup it/ play with the other nipple, I usually squeeze lightly, the motion you are looking for is like how mr krabs plays the smallest violin, moving your forefinger over your thumb.

this will drive her crazy, and only takes about 1-2 minutes but is very important because WERE ABOUT TO GO NUCLEAR.

move 1 hand down her pants, and undo its button + zipper if it has one. start moving around her vag BUT DO NOT TOUCH IT you are teasing her, touch the inner thigh and brush over her pussy, it should be wet at this point. At some point cup you hand over her pussy, and spread the pussy lips, because you are trying to FIND THE CLITORIS. this can be a damning problem on someone you don't know and you can't actually see the fucking vagina, so essentially we've been building this whole thing up in hopes shes horny enough to A: have a hard clit, and B: will let you stick your johnson in her. REMEMBER YOU ARE STILL DOING NIPPLE PLAY AND MAKING OUR WITH HER.

>after finding her clit, you are now nearly at 3rd base. fingering a girl has no perfect technique, some girls are too sensitive right on their clit so you must stimulate her over her clit hood, other girls like it right on it, some are SO sensitive that just sort of moving your hand in a rubbing motion like you would to clean something stick on the kitchen with a magic eraser.

what?

>missed one time
>hit the asshole
>dick was itchy for the next couple of weeks
>never again
>now I'm super careful every time in order to avoid the same thing from happening

i said thanks the first time i fucked my fiancee, she laughed so hard she started crying

its a good memory my dude

lmao this guy is an troll
dont listen to him

Are you literally 14? 5 minutes of sex is only acceptable if you've haven't sexed in months, and even then it's not good. 20 mins of foreplay + 20 mins of sex should be your baseline if you're having semi regular relations m8

> at some point you must take off her pants, do such, or even telling her at this point to take off her pants she will probably comply, shes horny and ready for the dick.
>obviously you have to have taken yoru cloths off, and don't leave anything on her or you, full naked is the best kind of 1st time sex with anyone.
NOW YOU HAVE A CHOICE,

>choose your adventure!

Cunnalingus (oral sex)
This is hard i usually avoid this till later see: AVOIDING CUMMING EARLY

normal sex:
this isn't porn, don't fuck her like a robot, but fuck her firmly and lovingly passionatly, more skin touching is better, if its fun for you, its probably fun for her. you know the positions, use them but honestly most girls/people like missionary on the first go, its much more personal. which leads to

AVOIDING CUMMING EARLY.
at some point you may need to cum, note not want, but need. as in You will not have a choice. to avoid this choice preemptively pull your dick out (condom or otherwise) and proceed to give her oral sex. My rule of thumb is If shes came once, you're in the green light to cum too. however its always nice to make her cum more (she also will be down to have sex more if its good).

DO NOT LAP HER LIKE A FUCKING DOG. your goal is to stimulate the clit till you are ready to stick your dick back in. ive attached additional reading on this subject.

kek if you do it right 5 minutes is all you need

Mate, no. Maybe you're going hell for leather as soon as you get in there, take your time lad

> mr krabs plays the smallest violin,

It's not a big deal dude. It's not gonna be the only time you have sex, it's just the first time you have sex. There's a first time for everything and no one expects it to be an amazing performance the first time you do it.

Do things in calmly and let take control whenever you don't feel secure. Missionary is not rocket science and if you can't find the opening, she can find it.

it put a visual in your head didn't it :-)

Eat the fuck outta her pussy..

Yea and I kekd hard

When you're ready to stick it in, don't just force it in, but take it slow, because unless you got a small dick it's not gonna fit straight away. Slow at first, faster near the end

>just a man tending to his memes

I make my gf cum within the first 2 minutes, I'm not too worried, lad

Sure you do buddy

CUMMING.
>her
You will know she is cumming if it seems like shes having a heart attack, she will tense the fuck up, and grab you and claw your back and shit. this is a good thing, don't slow down, but also don't fuck her any harder. she got off to what you were doing, not anything else. she may have done this already during the fingering/ if you ate her out.

>YOU
IF RAW DAWGING
TELL HER YOU'RE CUMMING, AND CUM ON HER ASS/ TUMMY IN THE RESPECTIVE POSITIONS. OR GO GET A CONDOM AND FUCK HER, THEN FINISH IN A FUCKING CONDOM THIS IS NOT PORN, SHE WILL PROBABLY NOT WANT CUM ON HER FACE (yet).

IF CONDOM
cum in the condom dude that's what they are there for.

NOTES:
-lady parts smell sometimes, especially on bigger girls, if she does no need to for cunnalingus, but you should finger her instead out of courtesy.
-you may not cum at all because you are nervous, this is okay.
-you may cum early if you are nervous this is less okay, find alternatives to making her feel good that don't involve you cumming i.e cunnalingus + fingering
-ASK IF SHE HAS STD'S OR IS ON BIRTH CONTROL. do this while sucking on her nipples. this is the optimal time. 2nd base
-ADVANCED SEXING: women love dirty talk, but don't try it till you know her a bit more. simply ask her "you like that?" "do you like that/my (big?) dick in you?" this is not a serious question. she does like it that's why shes having sex with you. there is no goal, with dirty talk, and don't focus on submissive/ dominate shit, just ask her exactly what i wrote. i don't reccomend doing this if you arn't familiar/comfortable, but try it out if you are!

small dick? I'm sorry mate

not the other guy but i mean you can do that if you have a nice dick and have lots of foreplay, but some scrub on his first dig with a girl, don't make him more nervous than he already his

Don't do dirty talk if you are not a yank

I'm not lol, I was saying earlier just to relax and enjoy yourself

This other faggot is saying you have to last a "baseline" of 20 minutes to be remotely good. That's just bullshit, unless you have a micropenis

Do not ask if she has STDs wtf dude just wear a condom

That process has saved me twice now from getting herpes. So yes ask if she has STD's.

oh okay, i agree then, theres so many more factors to being a good fuck than length of session

wtf

I feel like I'd have to idea how to finger a girl or eat her out and I would just embarrass myself. Should I just try and get hard from making out and then stick it in doggy and go from there? I'm sure with my libido stack I'll be hard as fuck without much effort

Appreciate the help brahs

This is turning me on.
N-no homo

Kind of unrelated but didn't see a sexual health generally:

>meet cute trap through online dating
>not really into the trap thing but open minded "no homo"
>been on a few dates
>very passable, pretty, if you saw her in the streets you would have no idea
>great conversation, we really bond over shared music (shes into black metal ffs) / life experience
>she wants me to sleep over for the first time this weekend
>it wasn't discussed, but am expecting sex will be on the table
>I don't actually know if she's pre or post op
>any anons have experience doing it with a trap? keep in mind I have literally no experience with a dick. It's not a deal breaker at all, but what do?
>Any gay / Bi anons have tips? what should I do? play with it like its a vagina? ignore it completely?
>take that sweet boipucci to poundtown?

tl:dr - about to have sex with trap for first time, what do?

prepare yourself for the disgusting smell

women's assholes smell nasty already I can't imagine what a traps would smell like

>eat da pussy til she's wet af
>by this point if you aren't hard you gay
>stick it in
missionary is usually easiest but putting her on top can be fun too

I am so sorry for your erectile dysfunction/ability to pleasure a woman

Have a wank beforehand so you'll last longer in bed

Don't care

Honestly probably better than a woman's asshole

>mr krabs

One rule for success in all things:

"Don't Try."

trap ass is better in every way as long as they take care of themselves

t. Trapfucker

Lol most chick's get dry after 5 minutes anyway. This guy is a tryhard.

>most chicks get dry after 5 minutes
What? Even water doesn't evaporate that quickly. Jesus lad.

5 minutes of sex is absolutely nothing you virgin

Not him, but I've found that using a condom dries that shit up real fast, unless your girl is literally pissing on you.

>using condoms
ISHYGDDT

T U N G T O B U N G

Don't be scared to tell the girl that you're nervous, maybe you can work something out. Two people having sex=two people communicating effectively

My thoughts exactly. The trick is just to buy a cockring that looks like a rolled up condom, so she thinks you put it in a bag. Then you just have to be sneaky after you finish from behind, and leave before she finds out the truth.

Try and relax. Do lots of foreplay. Great and easy positions are missionary, and try doggy with two pillows under her pelvis area, you get maximum depth and she gets nice and relaxed because she doesn't have to hold herself up = her cumming. Also in that position easy access with your hand to wrap around her leg and rub her clit which will make her squirt hard in that position

>women's assholes smell nasty already
either you're a virgin or you only bang fatties

got any pics of her body?

Just spoon you fucking dork. If ur if mish shes gonna try to stare in ur spergy eyes and shit. And in doggy she gonna break ur soft ass dick.

O i am laffin. sry m8 dont mean to be rude.

We could give you a million tips what to do but it's best just to try and see what happens. You will learn from the mistakes yourself

>she

I SURE HOPE YOU GET DAT DANK TANG

>doing steroids
>never even had sex
wtf

aka The Tactical Wank