Describe your gym regulars

Scooty McAsian
>shaped like a potato, kinda looks like he has downs
>walks everywhere, so I always seen him in town when im driving somewhere
>can almost squat three pl8 with backsnapping form
>always run for a while on the track, he tends to "scoot" as in he never picks up his feet more than an inch of the ground
>has ripped calfs, im usually mirin
>is in with the chad crowd for some reason

...

StinkBreh

>Walks into the gym everyone smells him
>Makes benches he's even looked at smell
>Barbell hip thrusts melt the bars with stank
>doesn't use the gym's shower
>finishes off his workout by revving his fart cannon rice rocket out of the parking lot to let everyone know they can breath again

The redpilled lifter

>is strong at important lifts
>structures his workouts
>people stare at him when doing weighted dips and weighted pullups
>brings water jug
>does bandwork/warmups
>does stretching

Holy thicc batman!!

Is it bad to not talk to people?

>never talks to people
>wears headphones
>walks with phone out and pretends he's reading something so he doesn't have to make eye contact

das me mang

you forgot

>yells sieg heils internally at the top of every deadlift
>glares at nonwhites and fatties when they're not looking
>will lie and tell a nonwhite and say "I'm gonna be for here for a while" when one asks him how many more sets he has left on the squat rack but will gladly do the opposite for a fellow member of the white race
>makes a loud comment on "commie units" if he steps on the bathroom scale and its set to kilograms instead of pounds

Belt
>Pajeet
>looks dyel
>Does 1 set and then switches to a different exercise
>wears a belt and gloves for EVERY exercise
>form is still shit

Ripperoni McShoulders
>Always doing weighted pullups with 40~50+kg
>Does a little jerk/spasm to try and pull up
>1/100th of a rep pullups
>Benches 100kg super fast for many many reps
>Always almost fails to re-rack the barbell
>Always drinking monster energy

lel this chairbro sounds funny. Does he lift at all or just come to watch people lift?

Skeleton Asians
>Skeleton Asian guy always on bike pedalling and pedalling
>Skeleton Asian girls repping with the lightest weights
>Literal sticks for limbs
>Looks like 12 year olds

at least hes a /SIPBOY/

>>Skeleton Asian girls repping with the lightest weights
>>Literal sticks for limbs
>>Looks like 12 year olds

This one asian chick at the gym yesterday fit this but she was super fucking cute. Like holy hell. Almost saw her pantsu when she was benching.

I've never seen the guy lift once but somehow hes always really sweaty when he leaves.

Big Bear
>6´1", 240lbs/110kg
>has beard and generally looks like a bear
>crazy strong
>saw him bech 5-6 pl8 once, whole gym stopped what they´re doing and watched

Fatty McPedo
>250lbs/115kg
>fat as fuck
>has pedo stache and weird haircut, looks absolutely ridiculous
>sweats like a motherfucker and has body odor that creates a second chernobyl evacuation zone arond him

Bun Bro
>awful man bun
>only uses machines
>has been going to the gym for almost 1,5 years but no gains whatsoever

>or/and

>>has been going to the gym for almost 1,5 years but no gains whatsoever
Is he maintaining?

the autistic girl
>kinda chubby, looks like she could be cute if she actually tried
>comes straight to the Smith machine
>loads up the weight and then stands back looking around for a minute
>I think she's incredibly autistic cause 3/7 times I've seen her she just leaves as soon as she puts the weights on

he´s in skelly/dyel mode so there´s nothing to maintain. i don´t know what the fuck he´s doing

>Oldie Hawn
50 something lean and wrinkled blonde who spends a good amount of time in the free weights and curls/rows more than most of the young guys. Does really weird ass in the air exercises like most girls, and does some painful looking floor movements. One of the few weird exercise women I have respect for

>Autismo Chad
Big tall facial haired guy who tries to ignore everyone all the time and seems either a grumpy fuck or full on autistic, but routinely gets girls trying to talk to him so is chadding right. Always tries to get rid of them by saying as little as possible or keeping earphones in and waving them away. I deadlift more than him, woo

>Surprising Asia Pantless Carerra
Short petite asian girl who's always doing heavy squats and lunges and wears what appears to be literal underwear on her bottom half and a hoodie or more on her top half. Been going for a while and is there every day. Presumably fitness model of some kind.

>Short-hair ghost girl
Short light hair and thicc as fuck, squats, deadlifts and does all good shit at impressive numbers even for me. Gorgeous too, pretty much my gym crush but she's silent and appears out of nowhere and is gone just as quick.

>Sidekick Paddy
Middle aged bald Irish? guy who is always training with a young guy and his girl or younger people but gives a trainer vibe rather than a pedo vibe. Also has lifting logos on his shirt from time to time so presumably a PT who's friendly with some other regulars. Not particularly big but seems like an OK dude.

>Clingy Cassandra
Fairly lean brunette always wearing spanx/spandex/tight ass yoga pants and always training with or talking to a chad or two- seems to socialise and annoy staff more than training but is still there just about every day and has been for a while so go figure.

The slavs
> rocking super tight tights with shorts over top
> eurosport top
> shake hands to greet every single person entering gym
> constantly speaking, using Ukrainian, only throwing out some broken English once in a while to ask how many sets you have left
> go's in tow, always in the way as they try and teach them to weightlift for the 4th year in a row

The nignog crew
> do 7 curls each to get a pump on
> climb on top of every machine or bench around to take pictures of each other
> sit on phones in the way for 25 minutes until the alpha nig beats chest and they leave

The mid 40s Instagram model
> all machines all day
> 3reps1selfie
> 4 sets of flirting with anything that gives it attention
> adjust makeup or whatever in mirror between sets

Bro from another hoe
> solid workout, workout ethic
> also hates everyone else in the gym
> just wants to get his lift on
> understands working in
> helps organize the weights and bring order back to the place after retards leave

>smelly norris
DYEL jesse norris look a like who reeks of sweat. Has made no proress over 2 years.

>The Bears
Two guys I know rom football who are also in the health care who as bear mode, does high volume training with low weight but their maxes are way more than their taining suggests

>The big LeBrowski
Guy who gets a fake spot on bench while "repping" 3 plates. total bro curl master with no leg or technique, just does whatever, but is still kinda big but his upper body massively overpowers the lower portion

>The adiprowling manlet
5'5 manlet who half reps everything. Wears 3 different colors of adipowers and squats mile high. he is skinny fat with no impressive lifts, but hes got a hot gf

>The Warden
He looks like Jerrry ward with a 159kg bench. He is in his 50s, has that jacked dad build that kinda throws you of since you dont know if hes fat or jacked. benched 120 for 5 with relative ease today. Sometimes I bench with him and he gives me pointers

Furious Frank

>only does curls and dumbbell presses, sometimes he does lateral raises
>moans very very loudly on every rep
>grunts often, paces through gym after every set
>drops the dumbbells from elbow height every god damn time
>i want to strangle him
>fuck furious frank, fum him

dude are you in Amsterdam, This is exactly my gym

El Caballo
>middle aged, vaguely latino man with spiked black hair and olive skin
>Circuit trains on 5 different sets of dumbbells at once
>Always has a towel under his shoulders
>Sweats like a pig
>Roided to the point of tearing his bicep but keeps going anyway

Tanvi Chopra
>mega milk indian girl
>Thoughtful Honest Interesting Communist Compassionate
>boobies spilling out her nike sports bra
>always getting instructed on glute extensions by her boyfriend

The Korean Barbeque Beefsteaks
>small gang of korean kids
>breddy big for teenagers
>only do barbell compounds
>obviously bulkan for dem gains
>glare at you if you make eye contact with them

that's a THICC coon

>high volume training with low weight but their maxes are way more than their taining suggests
you ever heard of 5/3/1 or similar %ofmax programs my dud?

>Looks like 12 year olds
>super fucking cute

cont.

>crop top slag
Some british girl with butterface but with a banging body who wears sports brah so you can see the abzz. Got a hot ass but the face is kinda meh

>Cheater McGavin
Polo wearing youngster who half reps everything. Always has fancy gym clothes.

>Dan Diablos Green
Goth vesion of Dan Green. Is build okay-ish but has long arms. Long shaggy hair with black band t-shirts and long black baggy pants. He's got a massive deadlift compared to his squat. Does a lot o high rep benching and seems to know what he is doing. wont be surprised if he browsed Veeky Forums

>Jumanji Monkey Boys
two DYEL arabs who looks like Peter from jumanji when he gos ape mode. always wear hoodies to hide their no gain. Same size as last year with no visible progress on lifts or body.

>The Gap
Some chick with long legs and a reallly visible thigh gap. Always does box jumps and other girly meme lifts. has that slender petite qt build

yeah but these guise got a 4 plate bench but still push only 1 plate for like 25 reps. And that's after doing dumbbell work where it's pretty much the same. they do 10x10 on some exercises with no rest. the weight they move is so different than what they are capable of. This is nothing like 5/3/1

Rutger Hauer
>tall
>blond
>buff
>dutch

The manlet marine
>always wears white cargo shorts
>always wears combat boots
>always wears a marine shirt
>never see him actually do anything except go to the sauna
>dyel tier legs

The JuCo prodigy
>big nig, 6'3 or 6'4 half black guy
>always doing heavy deadlifts and squats
>lots of football strengthening workout
>always mired

>Like an of age girl because she looks young
I'm sorry.
That's not how that works.

The powerlifting pack
>Bunch of dudes who are strong as fuck
>Deadlift like 350kg, squats like 360kg, bench 240
>Friendly and chill as fuck
>Always gives you good advices

The Hot chick and her fat husband
>Bitch is hot as fuck
>Trains way way fucking harder than almost most of normal folks
>Squats 130kg, deadlift 170kg, bench around 85kg
>She's nice and her bf/husband is mute shy dude, but nice

The skinny dude and his cute gf
>This dude only does bench and pull-ups
>His chick does squat, legs and curl.
>Caught her few times eyeing me
>Talk to her about some random shit
>Her bf got all annoyed
>Now she comes alone, we started talking a bit more
>Gonna fuck her insha Allah

The loud fat fuck

>This fat scum is the worst
>I have seen him working out like over a year
>fat bastard expands like a heated balloon
>He's probably 140kg, but would swear of that he's 105kg
>Talk shit basically anyone who lifts more than him and accuse them for using roids
>Basically a fat piece of shit. fuck that guy

The old school 50's bros
>These dudes come
>do some light work outs
> leave like in 40 minutes

The Weird guy
>This fucker all he does is upper body
>every fucking day
>never ever see him talking to anyone
>He's mental I guess
>Only stare into your soul

must admit, that sounds strange idd

>Autismo chad

Sounds like envy :^√

...

she forgets to workout. like when you walk into your kitchen, open the fridge, and just stare it wondering ''wtf I want to take?'' then close it and walk out.

>The one who never changes
Actually couple of dudes I've been seeing for over two years but have not made a single minor visual nor strength gain. Specifically that one twat who hogs the power rack and is hestiant to let you work in even though He does not make any progress anyway

>The Hokaah Mafia
Bunch of cringy dudes from all walks of life coming in to work out but manage to make low progress while mostly talking about shit like going to the local restaurant or smoking Hokaah afterwards

>Gainicus and his Dyels
I have deep hatred for this one. It's a fucking faggot always wearing the same Tank Top with the caption "Gainicus" on it who once hogged the only bench press for over one and a half hour (1:30h) with his one friend doing 10x3 while being weak as fuck and not letting anyone work in. This has carried over to pretty much using any eqiupment for an absurdly long time having resting times not even god can comprehend and not letting anyone work in. That twat friend of Gainicus also sneezed a Bunch of times into his palm and started bench pressing Instantly after which made me look at him in disgust.

>Retarded Highschoolers
Dudes I've been to school with working out because summer is approaching but literally not knowing What they're doing

>Old wise men
Rather go to the Gym to teach you valuable life lessons but at some point you just want to keep working out.

I like the dog picture you got there

It's either that or she can't find clips for the Smith machine. My uni gym is plagued by people who put clips on literally everything. I've found 3 pairs of clips at the Smith machine once...

>reddit spacing

>Crew of huge Asian guys who powerlift crazy weight
>Not-huge Asian guy who moves all the benches aside and does kung fu in the crowded dumbbell area
>Guy who wears the same shirt and shorts every day and smells like literal shit from 15 feet away
>Couple who do absolute headass shit, the other day the guy was benching and the girl would lean down and kiss him after every rep, they did this until the manager appeared and told them to stop because it was "unsafe". Also do shit like pull-ups with the girl hanging on to the guy
>Thots who wear translucent leggings and full makeup and do stupid shit like 20-lb good mornings in front of everyone
>A couple of literally me who come alone and don't talk to anyone

>Quoting the whole thread
Was it autism?

(you)

>the entire thread
Just because you were included doesn't mean it's the entire thread faggot. I only included the posts that used "Reddit" spacing.
>inb4 I don't know what that is
Thanks I guess.

There's one guy who occasionally posts up at the keg press machine, and completely fills both sides with 45s, I once counted and it held 14 plates on each side. He then has his friends get the heaviest dumbbells (~100) and wedge them so that they sit atop the plates.
Then he'll hype himself up for 5 minutes, do one screaming quarter-rep, and rest for 5 more minutes.
The worst part is that he locks his knees after the single rep, so I'm always watching with my teeth clenched wondering if I'm about to witness a snibbedi snab.
It reminded me of that video where an old guy put every plate in his gym on the leg press and did 1/16 reps

The new know it all
>lifting less than 6 months
>overly enthusiastic
>thinks they know everything
>doing SS/SL
>doesn't listen to your advice
>tries to correct other people's form

The powerlifting chad
>looks better than you
>stronger than you
>lower body fat than you
>knows more than you

The bodybuilding chad
>looks better than you
>bigger than you'll ever be
>squats less than you, but has legs sculpted from marble
>seemingly endless wealth from the concoction he brings to the gym to drink

the pajeets
>either lift in polo shirts or they're full kit wankers
>reek of body odor
>bench like 65lbs
>use every machine after benching

the chink
>squats the weight of the entire world
>poverty bench

Fat, five foot tall, mexican looking woman
>wears stretch pants that accentuate her no-ass
>loads up 50lbs on the leg press
>does a few quarter reps before just letting it fall on the safeties
>gets up, looks to see if anyone saw her
>walks away without unloading the weight or wiping the fucking thing down
>proceeds to squat in the smith machine with ten pounds on either side for maybe four quarter reps
>decides this is too hard too
>spends the next thirty minutes on the leg extension machine
>one rep every minute or so with the lowest weight possible
>takes a couple selfies
>leaves

Every fucking time

>takes 5 minute breaks between sets
I used to do this and thought this was the best way. You should lower the intensity slightly and just do more work though. If you do 3x5 at 85% of your 1rm with 5min rest in between it'll take you at least 15 minutes to finish your set, including warmups and you'd have lifted around 1275% of your 1rm. If you instead do 5x5 with 75% of your 1rm and 2 minutes of rest between sets, your time to finish will almost be the same, but you'll be lifting around 1875% of your 1rm or almost 50% more tonnage.

Use your time in the gym effectively.

The chode: is 145cm tall, and has a decent amount of mass but will always be 35% Body fat. We call him the chode because he's bald and fat and short.

>"Reddit" spacing
What the fuck are you even talking about?

The overcompensating turbo manlet.
>decent form and shape but hit his plateu years ago
>invisible lat syndrome.
>invents mating calls and hisses with EVERY SINGLE FUCKING LIFT
>get's mad when he's told to keep the noise to a minimum.
> say's he's "in the zone" and other outdated 80's phrases.
> showers in his trunks???

>more reddit spacing
I think a different site is more your speed.
XDDDD Ep*c, simply Ep*c.

>that's a THICC coon

Maybe he's more advanced than you; maybe he's adhering to a program that's so intense that he needs that much rest. For instance yesterday I squatted 6 sets of 2 reps at 80% of my max according to my program, and I still have to do a lot of volume on bench after those squats I needed 4mins rest even though they were just sets of 2.

Yeah, it was more of a suggestion for someone who hasn't discovered yet, that volume is more important than the lifting heavy meme. Progressive overload is still a key component of growth of course.

If you follow a program structured program, you most likely already have days or blocks dedicated to higher volume sessions and others to intensity or other phases, so you're free to disregard anything I said.

>this
it all depends on how much you actually lift, since it's percentages it's all relative

>since it's percentages it's all relative
It's honestly astounding.
>be intermediate lifter: 80% of max for reps every week not bad at all, just do it brah
>be advanced lifter: I can feel my pulse and blood pressure go up at the thought of 80%+ for reps

Bodyweight Batman
>Indian
>Always doing some mental bodyweight exercises
>On the rare occasion, does some lifts
>Said lifts are impressive
>Always in a different Batman T-Shirt

Rugby Monsters x 2
>Every. Day.
>Thicc, Stronk
>Mixtures Of Heavy Lifts & Cardio
>Easy 6'4"

The Clanger
>Brings Own Lockjaw Collars
>5'7" dumpling
>'CLANG', every, 'CLANG', single, 'CLANG', row
>'CLANG', every, 'CLANG', single, 'CLANG', deadlift
>every fucker has given him advice

Le Bros
>Different routine every two week
>Something weird off Reddit no doubt
>Lifts are decent though

yeah what's the deal with the handshakes?
these huge ass roided polacks at one of the gym's i frequent do this as well.
it's actually quite cool, greeting people and making them feel welcome.

The Nameless Screamer of Impeccable form
>5'7
>perfect aesthetics
>does really tiny weights but IMPECCABLE form
>knows the name of EVERY guy in the gym, literally everyone
>I didn't even tell him my fucking name, but he knows it
>nobody knows HIS name

The Deltoid Viking
>6'4 dude with long blonde hair
>does 200lbs OHP for reps
>haven't seen him do any other exercise

The Me
>total loser
>lazy, used to think I'm smart but I'm just lazy and stupid
>gf is about to leave me
>procrastinate even the simplest of tasks like putting old socks in one pile
>begged my uncle for a job at his factory
>probably not gonna suck even at that
>used to compete in powerlifting, had a good start, but lost motivation gradually
>haven't lifted in 3 years
>still go on Veeky Forums out of nostalgia
>post about old shit I used to do
>lie to myself every day that I'm going to bed early

Old Folk
>always find something to complain about
>trying to outrun death on the elliptical

Debz
>40-50 y/o woman
>showed me how to deadlift way back when
>deadlifts 170kg
>pretty sure juicing as better stubble than me

Old paki
>does curls
>does bench pretty well
>only there because his wife forces him to

Young pakis
>does curls
>smells
>speak like taj from come fly with me
>half rep
>make noise and never rerack
>come in groups of 10 (mosque day out???)

Sted-heads
>sound blokes
>know their shit

Roasties
>need I say anything

Newfag detected

We have a raccoon that hangouts in the entrance to the ally way besides my gym. Dudes must be feeding it whey scoops or something because mother fucker af.

me minus the asian and potato part

To be fair, some people put plates back retarded as hell. Fucking, a 10, a 35, a 45, and a 5. On a rack in that order. Like nigger you gonna make me dig through 4 fucking plates to get to the one I need? It's rude af to not put away weights properly.

T. I'm the guy who reracks the weights properly.

Hey, noone thanks you're clever. Your post was absolutely terrible in quality, what did I type that gave the presence of a newfag? Sorry that I called you reddit, but some one needed to say it.

Middle aged black guy
> would fuck you up
> surprisingly nice
> probably works on construction or something
> when he benches he loads up a shit ton of 10's instead of using 45's
The regular 35 year old white guy
> has been going to the same gym as me for 3 years and hasn't progressed at all
> literally looks the exact same
Body builder
> upper body is higher, possibly not natty
> has chicken legs

>The Suicide Squad
Two guys that workout together, one is an arab and the other is a local but doesn't seem too bright. They always bench press with suicide grip and when asked the local guy said that it's not a problem if you know what you're doing and that he's been doing it for 4 years

this thread makes me wonder what the gym people think of me lol :(

literally everybody posting in here is secretly hoping to recognize themselves in a greentext

>Fucking, a 10, a 35, a 45, and a 5. On a rack in that order
>you gonna make me dig through 4 fucking plates to get to the one I need

>2018-1
>needing a 5lb plate

this is excusable if you are a female

>mad

one punch nignog
>strong as fugg
>can kill you in a single blow
>lifts more than he can count
>one of the nicest people in the gym

curlbro double combo
>self-explanatory

latina powerhouse
>slim but she thicc
>squats and leg presses significantly heavier weight than the average
>goddess
>gets hit on by two punch nignog

roidster
>disgustingly huge
>wtf.jpg
>terrible Bacne

normie fugg
>looks pretty beef due to his higher body fat
>weak as fuck
>overall normie

Wtf... I've never experienced a chair guy. What's his motive?

So ebin. Also nice digits xD checked as they say.
[spoiler]still waiting for you to give me reason :/ [/spoiler]

Nothing too crazy.

Cool Bros
One is kind of DYEL. One lifts almost as much as me. He always talks to me and i can't remember his name.

All arms black dude
Never does anything but curls and probably has like 20" biceps

Big Fucking Hawaiin
Don't know if he's actually hawaiin but god damn he's fucking huge. Only does compound lifts. Benches probably in the mid 400's.

Also Pic Related is from the board at my gym.

>the guy that wears a camelback to the gym and takes a sip after every rep
>takes a nice, long swig after he finishes his set

I would like to do this but I don't want to be a faggor.

>>wipes down equipment even if he didn't use it
I can't be the only one here who does this.

I also go into public toilets with intent to take a shit, then just clean them, and don't shit.

...

I just noticed he was holding the chink like that kek

>never ever see him talking to anyone
>He's mental I guess
are you actually supposed to talk to people at the gym? ( asking for a friend)

>not using superior text aesthetics

>The Morbidly Obese Nigger
Two of these actually, both easily over 300lbs. Hog the good treadmill for upwards of an hour slowly waddling along at a .005% incline. When they dismount to use machines, they do one set and depart, leaving the foulest nigger-juice BO stench in their wake, like sewage dreadlocks and rotten KFC. Have never touched a freeweight and would probably try to eat them.
>The YeeHaw
taller guy who only works out in john deere tank tops, jean shorts, Realtree camo ball caps and steel toes. Carries a gallon of water in his left hand and a spitter in the right. Only does arms.
>The Look-at-me Stacy
The entirety of material in her workout outfit could barely count for one of the legs of my shorts. Boobies and butt out in glorious full display. Sometimes wears those trendy new yoga pants with the see-through strips on the sides so that her all-over spray tan isn't ignored. Wears a choker to the gym. Religiously uses the Elliptical machine and nothing else ever, for hours.
>Dark licorice
6'4" Pajeet with legs thinner than your wrists. If viewed from the side, his needle-arms are simply not visible in low light. Attempts to deadlift, shakes like a pager with parkinsons and quits to do three overhead press reps with 30lb dumbbells before releasing them like poo to the street.
>the Neet-Pajeet
5'6" in heels, arms about what you would expect, a full beard and glasses thicker than 100lb dumbbells. Has a potbelly remniscent of starving African children. Looks like a malted melt ball standing on two toothpicks.
>Punished DYEL
average sized and tall kid who comes in, attempts to lift far past his ability solely on machines, makes a face like he's giving birth to one of the two obese niggers, fails, and storms out angrily after 5-6 tries at this ritual.

Sure

>Tourette's Guy
This guy is either Tourette's as fuark or high on amphetamines 24/7. Probably both. Walks around the gym spouting nonsense at max volume in short bursts. When he talks to you it's always about how much cocaine he does. Strictly does upper body exercises

>Frank
City cop, lifts heavy, has closely spaced eyes, one of which I think is slightly lazy. Always seems to work out with two middle aged fat women. One of the girls is pretty swole though. Frank is a good guy and speaks with intensity all the time. Always willing to spot you if you need it. Possibly homo

>Stella
Gym manager, tranny(?). I say ? because not really sure. He/she looks like a normal dude except wears eye shadow and has a high pitched voice. Is absolutely RIPPED. Does like a 5pl8 squat. Enough lifting knowledge to fill a library. Helped him/her to fix one of the rowing machines and got a month of free membership for it. Afraid to assign pronouns lest I get my ass beat by her/him and the 6 giganiggas he/she lifts with

Powerlifting gyms have interesting characters, I have more if you're interested

Cont.
>Chingus and Chongus
One looks like an opiate addicted veteran of the korean war, the other like an Asiatic beans from even stevens. The former is obviously the latter's trusted sensei, and demonstrates how to use machines with the fury and facial expressions of a kamikaze bracing for impact. His pupil then proceeds to complete a single set at the lowest weight and then spends 30 seconds at the water fountain before moving on. This happens every visit. Neither are taller than 5'7".
>Monkey Trouble
The Wooly manlet who exclusively uses the pull-up bars. Has enough hair on his everything to knit a pelt-cape from. Acts disgruntled and lopes off in a huff if someone asks to use the space he's currently performing his simian acrobatics in. May actually be an orangutan in semiconvincing drag.
>Invader Xena, Warrior princess
Looks like what would happen if a hot topic employee got trapped in a golds gym on their way to work and couldn't get their mom to come pick them up for two years. Has never been seen in a shirt without an invader zim character on it. Abysmal form on everything, and clenches her teeth like she's attempting to bust the cock off a marble statue. Kind of fat for some reason.
>The Old Guard
The only man over 30 in a university gym. Kind of looks like what would happen if obama, Jay-
Z and morgan freeman had a threeway. Wears tap out shirts, gloves, and gives advice solely to other African American lifters. Seems to know everybody in the gym and has shaken every hand not currently attached to a weight.

Grandpa
> gray-haired guy who works out every day
> chipper, friendly, will talk your ear off
> looks like he's in his mid-60s
> is in fact 75, has been lifting most of his life, and is always willing to give you good advice and encouragement
> everyone loves him

Genghis Khan
> 5'4 asian manlet bodybuilder teeming with manlet rage
> glowers at everyone
> placed second in a bodybuilding show
> dating a sexy blonde womanlet
> my buddies call them Thumbelina and Rumpelstiltskin

Poutine
> chunky quebecoise med student
> comes in and half-reps everything
> tusken raider bench, weighted knee bends, everything
> clearly thinks she's badass and grunts loudly while struggling to lower 95lbs to a foot over her chest

Frodo
> the tiniest manlet I've ever seen
> probably 5'2 and timid-looking, with glasses and a bushy beard
> every day is arms day, and he puts everything into those curls with fixed-weight barbells
> kinda want to take him under my wing and teach him how to lift but also can't be arsed

Pajeet
> resident gym Indian
> mercifully doesn't smell bad, but always wears gloves and a polo
> I've never actually seen him lift. Will rack a weight on the bench (no warmup), sit on it for fifteen minutes, go get a drink, then come back and lower it 10lbs, repeating until he gets tired

The """Powerlifters"""
> two girls that take themselves extremely seriously
> belts for 150lb squats
> constantly post "motivational" photos on instagram to the chorus of hundreds of sycophantic betas
> have mutual friends with them so I have to be nice
> compete with a sub-250 Wilks and get defensive if you ask them about it

Sensei
> graying Japanese gentleman that only comes in on Saturday mornings to bench
> has mastered the lost arts of ninjutsu - will steal plates off your bench, or even your bar if you're not watching
> gets pissy and pouts if you catch him or tell him how many sets you have left

>Between sets

>Autist that can't look people directly in the eye

>Feel super awkward if I do and look away quickly

>Idly glance at a wall mirror

>Make eye contact with someone's reflection

Am...Am I that guy?