Where does Veeky Forums meet girls other than bars and coed sports?

>stand up
Post next gig so we can crash it and make it sound like you killed

>Alcoholics Anonymous (Events/Meetings/Friends of Friends) ---> 6

Any hotties there?

>AA meeting
>uber
>wholefoods
i want to hear of your sexual escapades

Here's some of my material
youtu.be/nUoydjPyZOQ

Care to give advice? I'm 25 and have slept with exactly 0 women. Im in need of all the help I can get

Maybe I'm not experienced enough but how does the whole coffee shop/whole foods thing work

fuck you must be living in portlandian wholefood elven vilage safe zones

this hit me deep

Nice. Same.

Not op, but I'll chime in. My advice is to try and be interesting and sound interesting. When you approach, do it naturally, or come up with a natural-sounding excuse. Talk about whatever you find interesting that you think she'll find interesting. Sports? Yes. Vexillology? Probably not. Politics? Fuck no.

u fuk

I thought I told you to go find a hooker?

It's illegal where I live, and I don't wanna risk getting arrested

Sure dude. This one is real fucked up. Brace yourself

>Random Saturday night
>Driving for UBER to make a little extra $$
>Pick up this woman (age 39) outside of a house
>She was sitting on the porch and obviously tipsy
>She gets in and almost immediately starts complementing me on how handsome I am
>Rubbing my leg
>My name is user
>"Oh that's so funny, I had a son named user"
>Turns out her baby user died a few years ago as a toddler from an illness
>We get to her place
>She starts sucking my dick in driveway
>She has one of those situations where she lives in guest house behind her parents' house
>She gets a call from her mom
>TL;DR "Mom I'm a grown woman you can't tell me I can't fuck my UBER driver"
>We go into her guest house
>I am pretty sure we both understand this is a one time thing
>We talk as she gets undressed
>I tell her about my sobriety and my goals in life
>"Oh my god, you're such an amazing young man. I don't even know if I want to fuck you. You're too amazing"
>Nah bitch we gonna fuck
>She goes from a 6.5/10 with her clothes on to a 3/10 with her clothes off
>We're doing foreplay and she randomly brings up her dead son named user
>Wtf.jpg
>We fuck
>She sticks her finger up my ass. Actually feels really good
>She was so loose though. I could barely feel anything inside her. I mostly got off from the random finger in my ass
>I don't make her cum, I don't really care
>She makes me finger her while she vibrates herself to orgasm
>Oh god.jpg
>She finally cums
>I start getting dressed
>Look over to see her cradling her dead son's plush doll rabbit and staring at his photo
>OhfuckIneedtogetoutofhere.gif
>"So user, when can I see you again?"
>Uhhhh, I thought we both understood that this was a one time thing
>"WHAT THE FUCK YOU MEN ARE ALL THE SAME. YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG. FUCK YOUR SOBRIETY. YOU MAY BE SOBER BUT YOU'RE STILL A FUCKING DRUNK!!!!"
>Leave out her door and walk the dinosaur to my car

I don't think I've driven UBER since then

>Bitch still rated me five stars

do you want to risk being a permavirgin?

sex is like getting a job. it's easier to get a job with experience, but you need to work a shitty job first to get that experience.

Shit that didn't happen: the post

Fun Well I guess it's off to back pages then

Yeah there are some hotties in AA. But I have mostly slept with the more plain girls.

All the hotties have so many orbiter chodes around them that I refuse to engage and be one of them

In my experience it's all about just be confident and being genuine. I'll approach girls and I'll just legit start talking with them about things I'm thinking/feeling.

Every situation is different and I really just feel it out. But women are just like other people

Sometimes I start out by acting nervous:
>Hey I'm sorry, I'm super nervous but I just couldn't not talk to you, you're too pretty. Whats your name
Et cetera...
Women don't mind an initial nervousness. It's cute and complimenting to them. But it gets real old, real fast. You gotta change it to normal/confident within a matter of a minute or so

you damn lying, is this rl?
i have been lifting, shopping going to concerts etc etc, nothing ever happens, this shit only happens in soap operas and 4 chan stories

LOOK AT MY FUCKING CEPS DUDE..

I'm sorry to burst everyone's bubble but this shit happened IRL

Sometimes I don't believe it myself

As far as greentexts go, this isn't the most [pic related]

Fuck man that picture. Inspired me to go out and seize life and make memories now at 20. Next summer is gonna be my summer. Thanks for that, user.

do you think height matters?

I'm 5'8 but Mexican so I'll probably go with 5'2-5'6 grills.

Eeeh, in my experience, mostly in party settings and sometimes bar settings. Otherwise, you should be fine. The Mexican thing is an asset, especially if you're jacked

Height matters but only in relevance to the girl you're going for.

Idk though man. I'm 6'2" and fucked a girl who was 6'4". She loved the fact that I could pick her up and still swing her around and toss her on the bed despite her height

But in general, yes, go for the girls who are shorter than you

sadpanda
boorus
animu
mango
LN

Thanks fampai(s)

I've seen fellow spics that even shorter than me but look pretty guud because they're in good shape. I guess that kinda saves me

fuck that's a gorgeous pic

>rightinthefeels.jpg

Pretty much my entire life summed up in one sentence.

How would you rate your face?

sewing workshops
roller skate rinks
volunteer work
cuckolding conventions

That's an African-Japanese not a Messikan

>mfw I've been lied to
at least jorge antonio is mexican r-right?

I'm tempted to post a photo so you can judge yourself

Idk... 8/10 on a good day, 6/10 on a bad day

Do it faggot

I don't get girls talking to me. Just gay dudes, bi dudes, or "totally straight" dudes asking to suck my dick. Piss off with your conversion shit, these dudes sound like rapists when I repeatedly tell them no means no.

At least they pussy out when I tell them I'll call the authorities if they keep harassing me.

>go to show for one of my Indie folk bands
>sit at bar alone because no friends and get a buzz before main act starts
>girl approaches me, make small talk multiple times
>after about two or three rounds they always drop that they came with their girlfriend and she's lesbian
>???.jpg
This has happened the last four shows I've gone to, what do they mean by this?
Do they feel bad because I look autistic, just being friendly? I get hit on a lot but never pick up that they're gay until they tell me

Fine

reeeeeeeeeeeee I can't compete with this

connor, da fuck are you doing here?
I'm gonna tell mom

ultimate kek

Brad

what? He's good looking but not a god.

He's still much better and more masculine looking than me.

>Holyfuck

Happens to me too. Last weekend a drunk off her ass lesbian, cute little butch ones that are trying to be Beiberish was all over the me to the point her gf was getting pissed. Who btw looked straight, go figure.

Fuckin got a Tinder date with one very similar and gay as it gets. Said she was bi and we went out but I stalked her instagram and it's all lesbian power shit.

>ywn have norse god jeans

How tall are you?

he's 6'2 he said it earlier

clubs
raves
festivals
tinder
mall

t. someone who just got out of a 3 year relationship

pixiv

Year point five here gone and done
This thread is gold

Women currently in lesbian relationships can love cock still just as much as gay little prancing homo lala men that post their disgustingly smooth legs in knees0x for us all to fap too here.

I'm learning this.

Sounded like one was the jealous controlling type
If you can win her over, then you get the magical threesome.

Genius user, next time I'll try to win over the one who hasn't already committed to being interested. I'll report back because it'll definitely fucking happen again.

I ain't even mad now.

I meet literally dozens of women through hobbies, side jobs, and passion projects.

My advice: think of something you're interested in, like painting for example, and take a class. Guaranteed to have a few chicks in there.

If nothing else you have a fun time with two lovely ladies and get act like you're popular.

Holy shit this is why I'm a virgin.

Trying this. Different crowd from bar sluts.

>guaranteed to have a few chicks in there

but will they be 9/10 and interested in me

What kind of shit? Other than painting of course. I can think of cooking classes and alternative medicine stuffed but I'm drawing a blank on actual hobbies. Like painting.

>he needs help to figure out something he's interested in

I always meet some girls that had break up recently. Last girl I met in some bar and went on a date said she broke up with her ex two months ago and then started crying in front of me.

Get some interests beyond fitness man

Could even still be sports related, things like climbing clubs for example

You're not wrong

Boys I've never been to a bar before just never had a chance. I can talk to people quite easily at uni.
Should I go alone to a bar? I wanna lose my virginity but I'm not expecting this to happen immediately im fine with it taking time
Also what do I wear?

wear this

Depends on the bar. Fancy cocktail places, think $12+ for a drink, dress business casual. Normal dives, dress normal. Unless normal is a batman shirt with flipflops. Better yet, look at the people your age around you that are making it, dress like that. And it's perfectly fine to go solo as long as you're planning on striking up conversation with people so you're not alone. I go solo all the time to hedges me bets. Bringing competition with you is just silly.

...

Why is this so hard to watch oh lord lmao

>>Look over to see her cradling her dead son's plush doll rabbit and staring at his photo

>this is my competition

HOLY SHIT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THAT

Makes sense. Can you greentext what you do when you go in? When do you know to approach a girl and talk to her,

Its hard to find a hobby which girls would be into.

I have zero things in common with most women other than the off chance theres a female at the gym and usually it high chance of failure when you approach them there.

On Saturday nights I go walk around the nightlife area in my city and just approach girls on the street (it always goes better if they are by themselves or in threes so that you dont have another girl whos goal is to cockblock you) I dont drink or go in places because being by yourself in a bar is a bit creepy for girls. Being by yourself on the street you can get away with it as you can just say you were heading home early or about to meet a friend or that they are running late. When I approach I ask them where the zoo is or something stupid like that and then go from there asking them what their plans are for the night etc..etc..

All of my friends are hermits and never go out at all anymore since they are either married, in relationships or have kids (being 30 sucks) Its all down to me now and its all my fault for being shy and autistic when I was in my early and mid 20s. I have to play serious catchup now.

>just be yourself
>you can be a bit nervous

>walk straight to the bar
>sit down where you can see people
>know your 2 ingredient drink or beer and order it
>open a tab with a card or pay cash as you go if you need to
>put your cellphone on the bar as a casual distraction to fiddle with when you get a nervous
>look for girls you're interested in
>Talk to bar patrons in the mean time

You know through eye contact if she's into you. Several seconds of unbroken eye contact is what you want. It'll make you both nervous. People who want to fuck you or kill you are the only ones who will hold it.

>try it a few times
>finish drink and order number 2
>they do it more than once go say hi
>after that second drink, maybe three if you drink normally
>gotta kill inhibitions
>live around here, school, work? whatever bullshit you'd talk about to a random guy on a bench
>be cool and let their conversation evolve
>helps if you're naturally witty
>stay neutral, don't educate or argue, just small talk

None of this is going to work correctly but your confidence goes up with each try. Then you get good at it.

Totally would be have thought being alone on the street saying hello would be weirder to them. I'll try it.

>My cousin has that exact same tattoo
>excited face
>that's crazy

Bullshit like that works at bars when you're alone. Kills their creepy meter because you've got family with tattoos like them and now their guards down because how? Like minds, make up a story, doesn't matter. It's weird but it works.

I tried going into bars and found that I was always asked where my friends are and ended up getting to if i was drinking alone etc..etc..

Im a bit better at talking to people now so maybe I should try it again.

Friend's flaked on you last minute so now you're just going to have to make new ones. That's not a bad opening setup. What else was there to do?

>Next summer is gonna be my summer

Why not this summer?

Thanks a lot fampai much appreciated
I've cold approached a girl in college but her texts make it clear she ain't interested. Another time I saw a at in a library and after I caught her looking at me 2-3 times I mustered all my courage and as I was about to leave just grabbed a chair and sat her table. Asked her for no. But she said she had bf but was flattered. Got the balls just gotta practise.

I don't think that fast on my feet unfortunately. I'll keep it in my memory bank though

...

...

Pic is real great. Is it real?

>Pick up this woman (age 39) outside of a house
>She gets a call from her mom