How do I show that I'm fit on a tinder profile without being a try hard? I feel like a faggot every time I take selfies...

I'm an autistic fuck that's been in and out of jail for the past 8 years, finding people I relate to isn't easy in 2-3 months

Just take off your clothes.
I switched mine to show men and at least a third of them are not only Veeky Forums they're also all shirtless with no reason.

Find some cunt on your street and sneak up to his motorbike while no ones looking and get your mum to take a shirtless pic of you on it, wearing sunnies with a cigarette in your mouth.
>BOOM!
Swimming in puss

is it worth making a tinder if I'm 5'8 bare feet lads?

You guys ever write your tinder bios with your friends? Like passing the phoen to the left and then that guy writes it?

"I;m a cool guy, I'm a swell guy. Do you like rasinettes? Yeah you do, fucking look at yourself. Swipe right."

I told my friend this will get him ass, do you think it will work?

>that disgusting rhomboid ferret face

Thanks I got some badass Maui Jems and I do smoke plus my neighbor has a black rolls Royce...i guess if I'm gonna be a try hard anyway might as well go full out

Just say you're six foot with a seven inch penis. Learn the art of embellishment.

>autism

Nah nah nah. Motorbikes are dangerous user and smoking shows you have no care for your health. It's a winning combination.

Remember, women are retarded.

standard advice but join a team/hobby meetup type of thing. Pick up soccer etc

I didn't even have a body shot. I just wrote "gym goer" in my bio. I have a very good face tho

Not worth it when all I want is a tinder profile picture

I had a friend take a picture of me while deadlifting, worked fine

selfies make you look like a friendless loser (which I am) so i've come up with a few ways to show off my body while making it look like i do anything other than lift, watch anime, and play vidya:

>register for a 5k just so i get the bib. then i put the bib on and go running on a local trail. i set my camera in a tree and video myself running with the bib on. then i go home and grab a clear frame of me running so it looks like i'm running an event with other people
>go to the park to tan, and try to candidly take a picture of myself with groups of people in the background so it looks like i'm hanging at the park with them
>go to an open trivia night at a local bar, sit with some people on the random teams, and order a beer and take a selfie with my "new trivia friends." i then promptly finish my beer, say i need to use the bathroom, and leave

my tinder/okc profiles have no selfies at all and i've found that this method works very, very well compared to having only selfie pics. women think you're a normal person (lmao). the sad part is that I look normal enough (dress half-decent, Veeky Forums and lifting for 4 years, i go outside and tan and eat a lot of carrots to make it look like i do things outside, etc etc). they never suspect that i'm basically a neet who only watches chinese cartoons and plays video games all day

Then pretend to have those hobbies. For fuck sake user all you want to do is pump and dump. You're not writing a fucking three picture resume for your future tinderwhore wife.

This is so hilariously sad. I can't stop grinning.
>I eat a lot of carrots

>This is so hilariously sad
why? it gets me laid about once a month

...

This is more autistic than actually taking selfies.

>implying the girls wouldnt find out who you really are when (if) they start dating you

So basically just go do things and take pictures on 10 seconds intervals as if someone is taking it for me like the pathetic loner I am? Thanks, got it

>start dating you
i would never date them, do you think i'm retarded? autistic, yes, but not stupid.

So you never want a gf that loves and understands you for who you are? Fair enough, then your strategy is fine if you just want to get laid

Or you can sit here and be a self depreciating bitch. Just stand in front of your mirror with a uninterested look on your face, fresh out of the shower, towel over your shoulder, mirror almost showing your benis or better yet, have the a cup or something block out your Johnson and have your profile set out like this
>Name: Chad
>I'm broke, aimless and use women for money.
>Buy me dinner and we might fuck.

Then be a huge asshole and always end with
>so when do you wanna smash?

Op here...I have a gf back home I've seen once since I've moved so I'm just looking to get my dick wet

>So you never want a gf that loves and understands you for who you are?
no thanks.

>then your strategy is fine if you just want to get laid
that's what i've been saying

Wouldn't it be easier to actually pick up hobbies and get friends, you autist?

Im good at that desu and have the face for it, I guess this is a good option as well. I feel more comfortable with this

>Wouldn't it be easier to actually pick up hobbies and get friends
i already have my hobbies (lifting, anime, vidya) and i don't want friends. shitposting here and bullshitting with people in vidya is more than enough social interaction for me, thanks.

Go get em cunt

Girls care about face, the reality: if you are unsuccessful on tinder you are UNATTRACTIVE. Your 15 inch arms aren't changing your face, cope less

How many muscles do you see in pic related

I have been looking for this for ages to post for cunts here.

Yeah you're right, I'm going to just do a face picture then put one of those self taken pictures of me in my pool as a 2nd picture you autistic fucks suggested. Thanks guys, I love you.

Okpeaceoutbye

>another delray beach Veeky Forumsizen

go to obrians irish pub in boca and you'll make plenty of friends quickly (beer pong and karaoke nights are best)

most bars in delray beach suck dick and are full of old people.

maybe i'll see you around

i'm hugely successful on tinder - 3000+ matches and regularly have girls invite me over to theirs after just a few messages

still a soon to be 26 year old virgin though. i used to be obese and was bullied a bit in school which destroyed my self-esteem, and i've never managed to fully recover

>This will never happen to me

Post face and we will judge

Not user, but it's still sad

Does it matter if you get laid once a month if you have to do these things lel

Proof nigga

i deleted my first account at about 1500 about 10 months ago because i resolved to try to meet someone irl instead

i've been using this current account on and off for about 6 or 7 months

the original account

Where u from that you get so many matches? Also post bio, thanks.

Make tinder and find out how 90% of the girls there have nothing to say besides "squad things" and "netflix :3".
Don't worry about yourself, worry about what you find there.

london, but mediterranean parents. always just left my bio empty

Ok show pics. I'm from Cov btw.

How many people here fell for the girl looks only good on pics meme?

>don't know whether to be embarrassed on your behalf or impressed with your dedication and out-of-the-box thinking
if it works I guess?

>Does it matter if you get laid once a month if you have to do these things lel
if i have to do what? spend a few hours of effort for pics that have lasted for 2 years now? how many girls do you buy dinner before you actually get that fucc?

i hope we're talking about the northern coast of the mediterranean

Makes me feel quite shitty honestly, I'm still obese but losing atm I wonder if I have the potential this man has.

sorry i'd rather not after outing myself as a 26 year old virgin

north african but i could pass as spanish or italian or w/e, and mostly match with white chicks kek

nobody's this autistic r-right?

Lmao, what is this pic supposed to prove? Virtually all of these girls are at most 6/10. I really hope that this account is just some neet larping a hot guy, since he's fucking autistic with all these bold openers, no one does it that way. Just put some sexual hints here and there during a convo and escalate on the first date and FUCKING ABRACADABRA BOOM CONGRATULATIONS you've just banged her anyway not being as hot as this guy. Just pull and push; don't write "do you wanna smash?" but "do you wanna smash? but let's first go to a rave party, I'm fucking bored lol". One needs to be a virgin or completely autistic to not know that girls always want to have an excuse for being a slut.

t. had ONSs with girls hotter than any on that pic.

shouldn't have expected anything else of londonistan

you know what's funny, whenever i've been anywhere that's overwhelmingly white i've gotten even more matches than i do in london

it works

Just edit it so your eyes and name isn't show. Please.

That's because it's normal for London
E18 here, past gfs have been
>mixed
>white
>chinese
>black
>black

I'm actually surprised how much disdain i get from people when i date outside of race

Why is julie there twice?

>tfw never dated a black/ebony girl
what I'm missing my dude?

It's pronounced HOULIE

herpes

My current girl is thicc and when she has long, straight weave in she's fine as fuck - dat ass mang
Only problem is i have severe trust issues due to a few bad "girls" i had at Uni, so i have to cool my autism a lot. but i give great oral, so i keep her happy when i feel liek it

But she's nice and loves dancing, which i cannot do to save my life.

Only if youre American lmao, i ain't touching those ghetto thots

nah famm.

I have friends, user.

Goddammit. Did they have to use the hottest niggresses they could find for these pics

I already have herpes hehe

>on my ass

Not joking

D E V I L I S H
E
V
I
L
I
S
H

...

Honestly if you are Veeky Forums enough for anyone to care just post a shirtless mirror pic. I had an account with just a few face pics and got a few matches, but then I made an account with only shirtless mirror pics and got 7 matches the first day when my age range was only 18-18.

kek this is tinder dude.

Get off of tinder, it's degenerate.

So how many pics should I add of my face? Is just one enough?

Why is it sad? user is doing what he enjoys (lifting, anime, videogames) while being able to fool vagina owners he's "normal" and getting laid.

Yoo I live in Boca, and I met my current girlfriend on tinder. Just post a picture in a suit or something thats what i did. Just dont take the selfie like an autist and youll be fine.

Ive always wondered. How is tinder in south US? I heard over 60% population is clinically overweight so I imagine some 65-70% of people to look at least chubby. Is tinder full of "meat is for men" type of girls or not?

not op but I actually went to obrians last Friday night. Also op check out rockn angels on Thursdays. There's a lot of college qt's

Okay so for those who aren't successful or aren't a 6'+ Chad body model who can fuck on command, I have a formula that I've come up with.

I'm 5'8, 150, fit with a full beard. I'm a 5/10 at least but I would give myself an honest 7/10 to be generous. I on average hook up 2-3 times a month out of 5-10 dates. Here are my tips:

1. Pick her up. If you guys meet somewhere then it's going to be really fucking awkward when you part ways and she doesn't invite you because you didn't carpool. If the date doesn't go well then you have to suck it up and bring her back awkwardly.
2. If the date is not going well or you are unsure, just split the bill and only pay your tip, if you always pay then you are going to spend way too much unnecessary dollars on some random bitch.
3. If the date goes really well like I mean you guys are clearly hitting it off then do something afterwards definitely. If you both are really interested in each other then she will accept, my go to is to go for a walk afterwards.
4. If you go on a walk on like a trail or a park, keep hitting it off and making her laugh and holding hands then the next part is VERY important. A while down the trail if no one is near by (you should be holding hands), pull her in and kiss her nice and deep. If you guys start making out, bite her lip or neck a little and that will set off the fire in her pants.
5. Proceed to take her home, if you guys REALLY hit it off, an invite into her place will be obligatory at that point. If she doesn't invite you in: 1. She wants to take it slow OR 2. She is shy and wants you to make a move on it.
6. If she doesn't invite you then ask to use her bathroom or if she wants to watch something on Netflix or a movie before you guys part. (If it's super late out just do the bathroom thing.) When you get to her place, pull her in again and kiss her like before, this time getting more bitey and going for stuff like her ass or tits.
7. If you guys aren't fucking at this point then I don't know.

>>having matches

nope.

>get message from a random chick
>hey I see you're in a pic with anonette, do you know her?
How will you respond?

>shitimbald
always gets me

>>Do I fucking look like facebook bitch?

That place gives me heatenings.

>keep hitting it off and making her laugh and holding hands then the next part is VERY important.
>A while down the trail if no one is near by (you should be holding hands), pull her in and kiss her nice and deep.
>If you guys start making out, bite her lip or neck a little and that will set off the fire in her pants.

Lmao, is this some elementary school dating wiki-how?

1. Open with "heyy, you look like a fun, why not hang out today/tomorrow?".
2. Seal the exact place and date near your place. No more messages.
3. Order alcohol and start with making her laugh for 30 minutes.
4. When she'll be already comfortable with you, start escalating with touching and shit.
5. Order more alcohol.
6. Make out with her.
7. "I don't like the vibe of this place. My place is 5 minutes from here, don't you want to come in to watch some movie? I'll make us some good drinks." *some more bullshit if she's not convinced yet, but she should if you didn't fucked up points 4-6.
8.
9. Ask her to call an uber, because you need a decent amount of sleep for your gainz.

Works virtually every time.

>Go on an app DESIGNED FOR ONE NIGHT STANDS
>Use shitty catfish photo
>Surprised when girls are willing to just fuck

Good proof there retard

Think of occasions where its acceptable to be shirtless and use those.

- at the beach
- surfing
- swimming
- at festival maybe
- in fancy dress (at a party) that requires you to be shirtless e.g. pretending to be Putin riding a horse (sat on your friends back, who is dressed like horse)

You could also just wear a tank top in one of your pics. Unless you got a six pack then consider one of the above.

Say you are 5'11 and wear lifts. plenty of women lie about age, wee, wear shit loads of makeup and use old photos when they were thinner.

oh fuck yes, coping mechanism incoming

How the FUCK do you have 1500 matches and you are a virgin hahahahahahahahahaha

You need to learn about GAME as its clearly your rate limitting step. Look up heartiste, the rational male, r/theredpill's top posts of all time, etc

it doesnt matter if you are a virgin but have 1600+ matches. you have all the

btw your mindset should be not that you are a virgin, but that "you only had sex with a couple girls you had long term relationships with, and aren't used to different people"