Hey Veeky Forums

>I got fatfished on bumble.

angles pictures or just old photos?

Getting fit generally leads to more dates.. so I think the topic is at least tangentially related.

but fine.. to keep it Veeky Forums related

Why can't the old guys that buttfuck my in the gym lockerrooms showers ever use lube? My ass is always so tender the next day and it really stinks

All angled, and made her boobs look good

I wasnt mad about it because I felt like trying the food anyway, but I really wanted to ask her like what the fuck did you think was gonna happen here? This was gonna be some romcom shit where I realize I'm in love with you at the end? Who knows.

Did you pay for her?

imagine falling in love with a girl only to find out she has her steaks well done

Please post tit pic

>go out one night and get black out
>Some chick is texting me the next day
>Have no idea what she even looks like
>Ask her on a date
>Go to pick her up
>She's fat as fuck
I drove away before she got down her front steps hahaha

> Try out some dating site years ago as I just moved 1,200 miles away, I think it was called tagged or something
> Seems to be mostly niggers
> Finally chatting up some cute blonde girl
> We agree to hang out, I was gonna pick her up from work to smoke then get some dinner somewhere
> All her pictures were close up face shots, but I didn't even think about it
> She's a photographer at a Macy's studio, tells me to just come in and wait for her
> Get there and she's easily 250lbs
> Smoke a blunt with her just because I already had it rolled and wanted to smoke
> After we're about half way done tell her I can't do dinner because something came up
> She texted me an hour or so after telling me she's so high, I told her wait until she got home she would destroy everything in her fridge
> She didn't get it and kept trying to talk to me, never replied
> 2 weeks later texts me saying fuck you if you weren't interested you should of just said so
Online dating. Never again.

kek.. yep. Fuck wasting time in the company of a fatty. Dating is for porking

>> Get there and she's easily 250lbs
>> Smoke a blunt
>I told her wait until she got home she would destroy everything in her fridge
>> She didn't get it

Yeah which was definitely way more than I needed to do, but it was only like $15 extra

I read the exact same thing! Top kek, my friend!

>get a girls number
>she never replies back
>whatever it was a bad try anyway

>find another one, ask for her number
>she gives it to me and smiles
>no reply from text

>chat up another cutie
>she never replies either

>fourth times the charm right?
>flirt heavily back and forth with another chick
>next day call her because texting obviously doesnt work
>it's some redneck asking how the fuck i got his number

god fucking damnit why can't girls just say no instead of giving fake numbers? how often does this happen to yall? am i just mega autismo and don't realize it?

All lifting did was turn me from a socially awkward skinny fat kid to a socially awkwad dyel. I went speed dating and the girl who was next in the line of potential dates that I would see pretended to sleep to avoid talking to me.

You probably give off a psychopathic anger issues vibe

Gonna check

>went to a restaurant on a first date
>girl was cute 5'3" blonde with some tits
>I try to break the silence with questions like what do you take in school, do you like it?
>she replies "no"
>do you like animals?
>no
>what do you do for fun?
>idk
>meanwhile I'm eating these shitty cold smiley fries while she stares at me
>I ask for the bill 5 minutes in
>walk out of the restaurant, she follows.
>looks up at me blank stare, I give her a hug and say see ya!
>turn around and do the most self aware speed walk of my life trying to get to my truck as fast as possible

It's because if they say no a guy might freak out and murder them. Much easier to ignore them later or lie.

>IMBLYING

girls are fucking annoying and dumb cunts. I don't get this shit either. How long do you wait to text them initially though?

I went on my first date at age 22.

I went with this girl to the cheesecake factory and was so nervous I was shaking the whole time. Like shaking as if it were -5 below zero. People were staring at me, and this black guy next to me was laughing. The girl left 3 times to go to the bathroom and was probably calling her friends asking wtf to do.

I offered to pay, and left my wallet in the car. She paid for the meal. I drove her back to her place and said "I've never kissed a girl before. Will you be my first?" and she just stared at me and said she had to go.

I never spoke to her again.

>I went speed dating and the girl who was next in the line of potential dates that I would see pretended to sleep to avoid talking to me.

Jesus what a fucking cunt

next day or sometimes later that same day. all i say is something like "hey it's user from blank, whats up?"

people say i'm a really good listener and pretty empathatic for a guy.

lol.. bars are better for first dates dude.. kill the tension with some booze

Here's mine. I still laugh about this.

>Talking to girl on PoF. She lives over an hour away but is willing to drive to meet me
>Plan is to have some drinks at my place and go to comedy show close by
>She shows up, is easily over 100 pounds heavier than her photos.
>I let her in, immediately start panicking trying to think of a plan
>Afraid someone will see me at the comedy show, especially my ex
>can't be seen with fat girl.
>Comedy show is at 9, it's about 7:30pm.
>She sits on couch, I sit across room on chair
>I start talking, and don't stop. I know a lull in the conversation will lead to 'what time is it?'
>Bring up several times how early I had to wake up this morning, how tired I am.
>Keep talking really fast, thinking about whatever conversation I possibly can
>Somehow 9/11 comes up and she starts talking about how it's a conspiracy
>Not only fat but also dumb
>Keep talking until it's 9.
>OH MY, LOOK AT THE TIME! Guess we talked right through our plans!
>My Dog comes up to me, I say in baby voice 'awwww... is it your bed time???'
>tell her my dog needs to be put to bed
>say goodbye, never hear from her again
>Crisis Averted

Look at her photos again after she leaves to make sure I wasn't delusional. She used to be skinny, she had several full body shots. She probably hoped I'd give her a pity fuck since it was convenient. I might have but she was past the fat threshold for me.

lol.. duuude.. liquid courage is much better. Meet at a bar next time! I feel ya on the shakes though dude.. shit fucking blows

I want to believe a petite qt with tits out autism'd one of us

rekd and kekd

Way way way back in college I had a girl ask me for my number, we went on a date to a park since we're both broke college students and I kissed her on the cheek afterward. I asked if she wanted to go on a second date sometime and she said "Wait you thought we were on a date?"

It took a long time to recover my confidence and realize this chick was fucking crazy and it wasn't me. Shit burned me for at least 3 years and ruined my college dating experience.

Call the fatties out on their shit next time

>It took a long time to recover my confidence and realize this chick was fucking crazy and it wasn't me. Shit burned me for at least 3 years and ruined my college dating experience.

:(

fucking women >:(

Feel free to share your greentext stories on or or ; your thread is completely unrelated to fitness. Like, you didn't even try to connect your thread with the topic of fitness. Not in the slightest. Ciao

I had the same thing happen on PoF. She said she was 19 but must have taken those pictures in high school because she was probably a good 40lbs heavier than what her pictures lead me to believe.

>to keep it Veeky Forums related
>Why can't the old guys that buttfuck my in the gym lockerrooms showers ever use lube? My ass is always so tender the next day and it really stinks

I just want to frot in a hot girl's pussy with a gymbro.

Bring your own lube, you needy fuck.

Probably my lowest moment here guys
>be me, 23 y/o cis male
>was an RA in college, slightly above average looking but freshman girls went literally crazy over me, probably because the whole position of power thing, idk
>one floor in particular absolutely loved me, when they'd drink they'd essentially sexually harass me
>one girl on this floor (we'll call her Natalie) dated an RA a building over which was kind of against the rules, but somehow it was OK
>fast forward until past spring, quit my job and decided to go up and see my old residents and friends at school
>four day shitshow of drinking and kicking it, playing video games, re-living college
>day three, go out with one my old RA buddies who worked in my building and Natalie shows up at the first bar we go to
>say hi and try to ignore her because she's staring at me and I heard she's single
>she used to be cute, petite, wholesome girl, now she's chubby, just past thicc, not a fan
>go with my bud to another bar, she decides to tag along with me, starts holding my arm, touching my leg at the new bar, say fuck it I'll buy her a drink since I'm now drunk
>badidea.jpg
>she's now latched on to me, I literally can't shake her, tried to leave without telling her but she chased me outside
>I meet my other mates at a different bar, she followed me the whole way
>at this point, I'm super drunk, probably two drinks from blacking out
>this bar also has a dance floor, so we go down and my friends ditch me to go find one of our other pissed friends
>for some reason, think it'd be a good reason to make out with her, so I do
>it gets past the point of making out, apparently we end up sucking faces, almost dry humping on the dance floor

cont'd...

Sorry it's not a sip thread or a thread about how to stop masturbating.

>struggle-cuddle
What is this?

>>>Somehow 9/11 comes up and she starts talking about how it's a conspiracy
>>Not only fat but also dumb

just incase you're not baiting
riggedit.com/9-11/

well at least you tried, I would follow his advice

Kek

Are you the fat girl that tricked me into a date?

seriously KYS

That shit bothers me too.
Is that how you want to make your first impression? Like I'm just gonna see her and think, "I know she was so insecure about her appearance that she lied to me about it, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have a great personality." It's like she stepped up to the plate with two strikes.

I did that once. She started crying in the bar and a lot of people looked at me like I was a monster.

I tried to go to that bar a week later with some friends and the bartender kicked me out because he remembered me.

Fucking Austin, man. I love that town, but the alt-left is out in force there.