Fitness Cruise

ITT: Veeky Forums owns a fitness cruise liner

>manlets walk the plank

avast, I be capn' Cruz, and I have come for yer scoops

now hand 'em over, or ye'll be doing....CARDIO

>Awk! Hand over the scoops!

nigger

24 hour buffet
Sauna / steam room
Gym
PWO bar
>tfwnogf

>Captain! A sea Monsterâ„¢ spotted!

>push day
>ship changes direction

Welcome aboard!

>gay singles cruise

Ay ye filthy sea dogs!
Don't drop yer deadlifts or ye'll sink the bloody ship

>have to choose between this or rippetoe for personal trainers
:S

>no grils allowed

>In order to evacuate in an emergency, you must deadlift the lifeboats

>load cruise with enough fatties that their combined weight causes the boat to very slowly sink
>passengers face certain death unless they can collectively drop a enough weight to right the ship before the cruise's end
It's a metaphor

>lazy fatties deny ship sinking
>say theyre making it float better

>3000 people
>2700 in their rooms shitposting until the gym empties so they don't have to socialize
>100 people at the buffet
>100 people doing deadlifts
>100 person gay orgy in the locker room

>masT becomes the ship's mast

>Come aboard the Blast n Cruise Cruise
> departing from humanity

...

>going fishing for gain
>ran out of free bait

This ship will float at any weight

very witty
one kek for you

welp, you can definitely take any kind of barbell out of the gym. Becomes huge liability if there is a barbell

Very clever, user.

all guest rooms are on one side of the ship
if all the fattys spend all their day sleeping/doing nothing in their beds the ship will tilt

...

Very clever user, here is a (you)

>>manlets walk the plank
>Cruise liner is now completely empty

>free weights on a non stable platform
Looks like we might beach on Snap Island

What's it going to be called?
Testanic?
USS Two Scoops?
The Piana?

>Please do not feed the blokes inside the manlet pool

Its USS SS obviously

*manlet puddle

The SS NoHomo

>scoops
>not delegates
1 job

we name it the SS Gomad

...

You'll never take me alive!

Perfect.

10/10

>not owning a fitness submarine so you can hit proper depth

I'll choose Goobert any day over Rippletits

Scooby might get uncomfortably close to my ass, but I'm comfortable enough sexually (I think) to get over it since he knows his shit.

They will just argue that they're more suited for the sea since fat is technically more buoyant than muscle.

top kek

Nice

Gave me a chuckle.

that's not how buoyancy works user

get enough fatties and the ship will sink

If the manlets walk the plank, then who will entertain us, also who will squat the turbines in the manlet pit to move the ship?

You missed the joke user

They're whales anyway

...

The flag won't be very high then.

>This is your captain speaking. There's been a bit of a mix up with the passengers of this crews and next months. We have far less women on board than what was expected. In fact there are none. On the positive side, all locker rooms are available for use.

>mid squat
>ship hits wave
Congrats you now have permanent spin damage

>manlets walk the plank

there goes 93% of the ship.

that doesn't Veeky Forums in with with the Veeky Forums theme you fucking asperger

>hitting an iceberg
>everyone's climbing on it to cool the balls and boost test

It's perfect

Im fucking dying over here fuck you

Fucking kek

...

lmao

...

>filenames
Kek'd

>4 week cruise
>3000 people
>ship needs to bring 84000 gallons of milk

Why is this so fucking funny holy shit

Caribbean cruise for maximum vanity lifting.

underrated