Go to store to get groceries

>go to store to get groceries
>go to check out with qt cashier
>she notices i have 7 bags of broccolli florets
>wow you must really like broccollli!
>yeah i eat a bag a day at dinner
>awkward pause
>make cringey joke
>i should be careful though, i dont want to eat too much and turn green
>looks at me weird and now rushes to finish scanning my items
a-am i retarded?

You should had said, "yea imagine myself being a giant and eating trees for breakfast"

You should have said mind your own business your roastie cunt.

You should have said, is none of your busissness you underpay pleb.

You should have said, "don't make eye contact with me female!".

>i should be careful though, i dont want to eat too much and turn green
sorry to break it to you user, but this joke is actually funny
the fact that she didn't laugh means you're ugly or you have literally 0 charisma

I would have laughed, OP. In fact, I did. I love dad jokes. IDK what was wrong with her.

...

user has shitty FACE aesthetics.

That's the kind of lame corny joke material I'd expect from an old filipino man, not a 20 something guy. If a guy said that to me while not under the influence of something, we'd be done

I usually don't even respond to people that make minimum wage.

Nah that's a cute joke, OP. I would have smiled.

I've worked min wage jobs despite having a quarter million in an investment account. You really shouldn't be so quick to judge

She is a cashier, she was making small talk, she literally dosnt give a fuck about anything you say or do.

you are reading way to much into this.

Also, the joke was funny, i would have laughed.

I make 175k at wendy's

who the fuck asked a woman's opinion? you don't even know what the fuck you want you dumb slag. leave

i agree with this female poster

this is something a little brother says

This.

You're worried about what a fucking cashier thinks of you?

That's fucking sad dude.

you should have said

>yeah they're really nutritious and i'm trying to eat healthier

open the conversation up and say some normal shit, not everything has to be a joke

alright op march back in there, find her and repeat the following:
>wow you must really like working as a cashier in a grocery store
She'll be on your dick in no time

What you said is fine, its just a polite if somewhat lame joke. Checkout girl was being autistic, not you.

maybe if own one or two

Dad and grandpa jokes are the best jokes

this

you should have said "i banged your mom"

Wrong. He was being autistic. So are you.

you mean, he should have said
>dont make eye contact with her
talking out loud to himself.

yeah thats fucking autistic mate nice job

You were about this level of autistic

might as well have told her you fart dank and shit 3 logs every morning

These aren't bad for you right?

I eat these steamable veggie bags a day but I'm a lil paranoid since everyone preaches how plastics leak phystoestrogens. Am I cucking myself by eating this shit?

You should've said you're trying to become the guy on the bag.

bumping

I dont microwave them, i typically just open the bag and cook them up in the pan with my chicken/ground turkey

This, more or less. Although I don't think OP is repulsive since the cashier tried to be friendly initially. This is just like that autistic ice dad thread from the other day. I'm pretty sure this cashier might have been autistic, just like the other guy's girlfriend's dad.

>we'd be done
yeah im sure you're a prize pig you fucking sow

>cooking them in the pan WITH the chicken.

wtf that's a great idea I usually cook them in a separate pan. you just saved me form washing an extra pan every day. Thank you bro.

This is why american comedians are dirt.
With proper delivery the not wanting to turn green line could be hilarious.
I would have went with something along the lines of
>my mom said they'd make me big and strong but I have a strange feeling she's lying
then the qt would giggle and compliment my physique