I feel like I don't Understand Anything Anymore

Welp I thought you fucks were lying when you said women are boring cunts and that sex isn't everything. After fucking 3 random girls over the span of a year, I can say that all 3 were boring zero personality cunts that are fucking bitching clowns that just waste my time. Holy fuck fapping is better than wasting my time fucking a girl and trying to satisfy their asses. The last girl was a virgin and even then I was bored as fuck. From the slut to the virgin, I'm just done.
My only goal in life now is just to be able to drag a giant fucking hunk of iron and swing the heaviest shit I can find that will be respected among the /fit community, then I can die.

By the way, I was a witness for a motorcyclist who was smashed by an old man. Watched the poor bastard bleed out and cry and try to get up and just slowly went silent and died right in front of me as I watched his guts poor out.

Life is fucking meaningless. That poor fuck just wanted to ride his motorcycle and now he is gone and his family will never see him to walk through the door again

Life truly is fucking meaningless, isn't it? I feel like after I watched a man die and go just like that, nothing in life matters. We are all just insignificant little peons on this planet, bored and waiting to die inevitably.

Well, I guess, your only option is to turn to Veeky Forums. There are plenty of good books that address nihilism and this meaninglessness both in defense and refutation. Have you experience with philosophy?

only thing that matters in life is masturbating

To pretend life has any actual purpose or meaning in the first place is delusional. The universe itself doesn't care about life, or us in general, and when you look around at our planet there is more death and sadness than life and happiness.

Do what you can to survive and keep yourself happy, other than that there is nothing else. Enjoy the ride while it last brother. We will all meet again in Valhalla.

No, I haven't.

Anyway, the detailed description is here. I posted it on /b/

So, there are a lot of options. A nice easy place to get into this mess of thought would be Albert Camus' The Stranger. I don't know what translation is best, but I was happy with Matthew Ward's edition.
While, ultimately, I dislike 'The Stranger' that's my first recommend. Also, even if you're not a Christian or Jew, read the book of Ecclesiastes. Read it as a sad poem, rather than as a religious text.
I'll be thinking of additional texts to send you, but Veeky Forums should be your next stop.

I'm a baptist. Surprisingly since if you met me I don't act like one.

...

wanna suck on her 3 inch anavar clit desu

Is it weird that I want to be considered attractive by the opposite sex, to dress and look nice, to have a personality girls consider attractive, and to hit all the "boyfriend/husband material" qualifiers, yet I'm not really interested in fucking and dating all that much?

I think being alone works fine for me most of the year, I'm not a celibate but I prefer I like to be on my own, but the idea that I couldn't get pussy if I wanted to is humiliating and drains my self-esteem.

this fucking is me.

Why do we lust to be perfect and yet not want to be in a relationship?

everyone thinks i'm gay because i could fuck pretty much any girl i know and i don't have sex at all

>yet I'm not really interested in fucking and dating all that much?
Because you've never done it.

I would still give Ecclesiastes another read if its in the Baptist bible; I'm working from a Catholic perspective which includes a bunch of 'apocrypha' according to Protestants.
Ah! Okay, I got it now:
1) Ecclesiastes
2) The Stranger, by Camus
3) Man's Search for Meaning, by Frankl
4) Thus Spoke Zarathustra, by Nietzsche

I think that would be a good order and primer. If you're still fucked up afterwards, well, then, I dunno, best of luck. I mean, Frankl wrote his book after surviving the Holocaust, so...

The question becomes not that it is weird, but rather what are you psychological/philosophical/historical reasons for this obsession/aversion?

>I was a witness for a motorcyclist who was smashed by an old man
Must have been a strong old man

>surviving the holocaust
>implying

Whoa, three girls in a year? No trolling? You're right OP, you don't understand shit

Casual sex without love is overrated as fuck. Everybody but virgins know that.

Riding motor bike is like suicide. Nobody who wants to live does that.

Cheers!

Sounds like seeing that accident maybe fucked you up OP.

Also yeh most girls are boring but same with dudes, most of them are nu make pop culture dipshits

Find a non-boring girl, they exist, but the big problem is, many men are wired to think they need to be higher lvl than the woman they're trying to woo (and many women think they should go for higher lvl men) so naturally you end up with someone boring. Look for someone of your level.

>the idea that I couldn't get pussy if I wanted to is humiliating and drains my self-esteem.
I feel this every day holy fuck

The Beautiful Ones experiment.