God tells you that you cant work on Saturday

When you switch it into kosher mode the LED light starts randomly firing. So when you flip the switch it will be a (((random))) time until it flashes again i.e. you did no work.

>rng is truly random

sadly, no

i get it, though. god gives you clear rules, proclaims you his chosen ppl. follow rules, but still get ass kicked. repeat for 2000 fucking years.

of course from time to time someone will say, "wait, we're doing it wrong" and re-interpret the rules. clearly they aren't going to re-think the "chosen people" section, so they can't give up the rules, right? just interpret the rules a little different. and they've been literate, reading the same fucking book all that time, being chased from one end of earth to the other like a fucking cartoon.

and all they had to do was listen to our main man Jesus and they could've had life on E-Z mode, growing crops and fighting for a king instead of packing up and moving every time they pissed off Christians.

i feel bad for them and the anti-semitism can be a little much considering their history.

>Would an almighty God really be okay with people dismissing the spirit of His law like this? Do people think God is that stupid?

The Hebrew text has been thoroughly disproved at this point in history and not a single Abrahamic in 2500 years has ever once given the slightest hint of evidence they work for any gods.

Do YOU think God is that stupid?

youtube.com/watch?v=t3R7YCWMzpo

stop shitting up my threads schizo

Their logic is as such:
>God is perfect
>therefore, His laws are perfect and free of mistakes
>we seem to have found a loophole
>however, God is perfect
>therefore, the loophole is not a mistake
>therefore, God would be okay with us using the loophole since it means we know His law really well

t. Schlomo

>stop shitting up my threads schizo

You're the one saying a talking serial-killing burning bush is "God" without the slightest hint of evidence that's true.

I, on the other hand, have overwhelming evidence Ma'at is God.

Enjoy hell - next time you decide you represent an intergalactic superhuman entity, maybe you should make sure it's true.

youtube.com/watch?v=oQIG5mJZu-0

Have you ever considered spreading your word to the Spirit Science people? I feel like those who are already participating in fringe occultism and the like might give you a warmer reception than you get here.

Honestly, read the old Testament. After Moses it is mostpy a story of a people chosen by god, who are refusing to live by his law, get warned by a prophet and only listen to him once something bad happens or is about to happen.

The god of the old testament is not woefull, it is just that the fucking jews don't act according to the fucking laws. And after 3000 years they still haven't learned.

>I feel like those who are already participating in fringe occultism and the like might give you a warmer reception than you get here.

Hate to break it to you, but Earth's Imperial Cults are far from fringe.

You "a talking burning bush gave me a blank check to rape, murder, vandalize and commit genocide" are the delusional nutcases. You just vastly overestimate the importance of most mortals to gods.

You were promised eternity in hell for high treason against God and Pharaoh, and that's what you'll get.

youtube.com/watch?v=LKYZaStqJt8

even god hates the jews

user.
Antisemitism is just natural effect of their behavior
Think about it.
They are not afraid to try to jew their god. And will do it with clear conscience if some wise men tell them that its OK.
Do you think they will have second thought for jewing a goy?
Heck, at this point I even consider blood libels true(or at last fairly possible), because who knows if some rabbi do not interpreter some text about cattle as goys and decide that they make some kosher food from them(goys) and its all right as he says so.
Its like them didn't get taste of fruit of knowledge of goods and evil.

Lol ok bro

I am not I did not intend the phrase "fringe occultism" to be a pejorative, I just couldn't think of a better term to describe the groups I meant. Essentially, I was referring to the people that subscribe to things such as this video: youtube.com/watch?v=0af5QED07zY
I am not trying to argue with or disprove you, as I know that pursuing such an errand benefits no one.
These people have demonstrated already that they are willing to accept ideas like those you espouse, so their relatively "fertile" environment seems like it would be a far better alternative to the hostility of Veeky Forums.

Last time you said that you were god now you're saying another word salad. take your meds you and your videos make no sense and nobody understands what you are trying to say

God this reminds me of that autisticly jewish logician who memorized the entire book and had to use a bucket of water to have his feets in when travelling in taxis during weekends for some reason.

>had to use a bucket of water to have his feets in when travelling in taxis during weekends for some reason.
I need to know more

Reminds me of the anecdote of ancient Levantese folk religion, in which the practicers would cover the statues eyes in order to cover up that their sacrifises were sickly and old goats instead of prime ones.

>That's like God telling you not to kill, so you just lock them in a room without food and say that they starved to death and you didn't do nothin.
Well that's how judaism works tho.

you call it genetic inferiority and ocd but i don't see you making up holocausts and owning the banks and media

Judaism is seen as a covenant, or CONTRACT, between the people of Israel and YHWH. As with all contracts since the beginning of time, the spirit doesn't matter, only the words on the page.

>using a quote from Shakespeare of all things as an argument for God
Nani the fuck

how's the autism going buddy?

>The god of the old testament is not woeful
>literally exterminates all but one human family instead of trying to improve things
user, please.

If pressing a button or flipping a lightswitch is work, how is opening/closing a door not work? How is anything not work?

>Nephilim giants
>human

>Fallen angels
>human

Don't talk about the Flood when you don't even understand what the antediluvian world was like and why it had to happen.

>religious people are hypocrites

wow stop the presses

I've seen more atheist hypocrites than theists.

doesn't every major religion tell you to give up all your possessions to help the poor? or not to jerk off? or to forgive everyone who ever wrongs you?

No.

"it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God" - Jesus Christ

“If your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away.” - Jesus Christ

"Turn the other cheek" - Jesus Christ

How can you be an atheist hypocrite? Merely pretending to not believe in God?

>Wham! lyrics
>People still argue with you in complete seriousness

Truly you are the Troll King

>being this delusional

It don't mean a thing, if the schizo ain't in the theology thread

apparently not
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electricity_on_Shabbat

Not quite.

The Torah itself is just the written law. But there's also a couple thousand years of interpretation and debate that is the unwritten law, since the written law is, understandably, a little vague at times.

Atheism is a mental illness.

>Worst Objection to Theism: Who Created God?
youtube.com/watch?v=kKKIvmcO5LQ

>Digital Physics Argument for God's Existence
youtube.com/watch?v=v2Xsp4FRgas

>The Leibnizian Cosmological Argument
youtube.com/watch?v=s2ULF5WixMM

>Quantum Physics Debunks Materialism
youtube.com/watch?v=4C5pq7W5yRM

>The Introspective Argument
youtube.com/watch?v=4l1lQMCOguw

>The Teleological Argument
youtube.com/watch?v=3Yt7hvgFuNg

>What Atheists Confuse
Part 1 youtube.com/watch?v=XbLJtxn_OCo
Part 2 youtube.com/watch?v=bj0lekx-NiQ

>Is Atheism a Delusion?
Part 1 youtube.com/watch?v=_Ii-bsrHB0o
Part 2 youtube.com/watch?v=xnBTJDje5xk

>Atheists Don't Exist
youtube.com/watch?v=qDX6F_O5XB0

>Darwinism's Downfall
youtube.com/watch?v=7IHO-QkmomY

>Evolution Debunked
newgeology.us/presentation32.html
trueorigin.org/

Actually dude, Your post proves that your particular brand of theism is a mental illness.
>>I'll respond to somebody insulting me by copy and pasting a bunch of youtube links nobody is actually going to bother going through, that'll show em!

>god doesn't exist
prove it. I'm not going to believe your butthurt statements without solid reasoning.

>prove it doesn't exist

lel

>How can you be an atheist hypocrite? Merely pretending to not believe in God?
By claiming to have a basis for their morality while believing that there is no metaphysical component to reality.

>inb4 I'm accused of being a psychopath that needs to be told not to kill people, as if that somehow invalidates the fact that it's perfectly natural for humans to kill each other.

I don't really remember the explanation as to why but I vividly remember the fact that he had to use a bucket of water. May have something to do with the taxi crossing bridges on certain days or something like that and that it doesn't count as crossing a bridge if your feet are wet or something odd like that.

Why would an atheist be a hypocrite for claiming that?

because hypocrisy is behavior that does not align with what you claim to believe. Atheists claim to believe in a godless universe guided only by scientific principles which can be tested and quantifiably observed, then proceed to engage in mental gymnastics justifying their adherence to systems of morality and ethics rooted in an epistemological system they reject.

Worst of all when confronted with their selective application of scientific right they accuse you of somehow being defective and morally shame you for insisting that they should be consistent in their beliefs.

*their selective application of scientific rigor

>all we've done is moved a single, isolated piece of plastic
Except it's not isolated; it's built into/over the switch. The switch itself is an isolated piece of plastic according to their logic, in that it doesn't transmit or conduct energy but merely facilitates its movement elsewhere, so what's the point?

Why are almost all Jews neurotic to the point of being mentally ill? Could it be the trauma induced via circumcision?

>genetically inferior Jews displaying their terminal OCD
Hard to objectively conclude otherwise.

Only fucking jews would try to trick god

>neurotic to the point of being mentally ill?
It's genetic. Something like 50% of Jews are mentally ill to the point of disability. This is very prevalent in Orthodox communities where inbreeding is very, very common.

Anyways, the point isn't that it doesn't make logical sense: The point is that the Torah is a contract. If the Jews follow Yahweh's rules, they get to be the Chosen People. But, some of those rules are hard to follow and many are very old; Judaism also says that old rules apply to things that didn't exist at the time of the Torah's various authorings. IE, lighting a fire counts as work. Using electricity counts as lighting a fire.

But you see, the Jew isn't allowed to light the fire on Sabbath. If, however, the Jew sets the kindling up in such a manner that it is conductive to starting the fire and it just ~happens~ to catch fire, the Jew is fine. In this scenario, the Jew sets up a situation that is conductive to the light switch turning off or on (flipping the switch) but didn't actually cause the change: The probabilistic effects are what cause the light to actually turn on or off. The Jew doesn't know when it will turn on or off, he just setup the right conditions for it to turn on or off on its own.

>The Jew doesn't know when it will turn on or off, he just setup the right conditions for it to turn on or off on its own.
>he just setup the right conditions
By working to do so. Even if you don’t know when an effect is going to happen due to a cause you created, you still created the cause through work.
This doesn’t make any sense.

>The probabilistic effects are what cause the light to actually turn on or off.
But a switch doesn't turn on 100% of the time; it might short circuit; it might be faulty. The intent is certainly for the light to come on, but this is the case with the Sabbath switch also. You could argue that you're simply "setting up" the light to come on by using the normal switch, and the rest is handled by God. There is literally no reason for the Sabbath switch other than to add another layer of abstraction onto the same cause and intent - it circumvents nothing. Jews are insanely cyclical, and I feel this is one of those cases where their obsession with abstraction has blinded them to the fact that they're still switching on a fucking light.

>Could it be the trauma induced via circumcision?
You meme but there's now new research coming out that suggests that circumcision is so drastic it permanently alters your brain structure.

Just google "circumcision permanently alters brain"

Can they flush the toilet on Saturday?

That's a good question. Any jew plumbers here to answer?

Bowel movements are already work enough on their own. At least mine are

If you consider them true, why do you refer to them as libel?

Thank you for reminding me how retarded my religion is. No, seriously. I needed a good reminder.

Anyone got the article about jews wearing trash bags on planes to avoid evil spirits?

Yes (not a plumber lol but I can answer). The reason for the electricity ban is that it's considered "creating something new" (i.e. creating a light), and that's a "type of work". More funny stuff that comes to mind:
- soaking up spilled wine/drink in a rag/napkin is work because you're "dyeing" the rag, so you have to just drop the rag on the stain instead of deliberately wiping. then you pick up the rag in an unusual way that you normally wouldn't so that you technically aren't "wiping".
- There are other things you do in an "unusual" way so that it doesn't count. Like opening soda bottles. You know how they're sealed, as in those little bands? Normally you would open them before shabbat because you aren't allowed to break that seal for some convoluted reason. But let's say you forgot and now you have now soda to drink. So just open it in a way that isn't your habitual way of doing it (e.g. open it with two fingers of your left hand, use two hands, etc) and voila it's kosher.
- google "eruv". Basically you aren't allowed to carry objects outdoors on Shabbat so you tie a string around a neighborhood which is considered a wall so technically you are indoors.
- there are really convoluted ways of pouring hot water to make coffee/tea on shabbat, but i can't remember it exactly. like first you pour hot water in a cup. then you spill it into a different cup, and then you put the instant coffee on top (definitely no brewed coffe on shabbat).
- if you are walking down the street and you see a valuable item (e.g. a diamond ring) you aren't allowed to pick it up (because that would be making a profit, i.e. work) but you are allowed to give it a little kick into some bushes, under a car, behind a rock etc so no one finds it and you can come get it after shabat

there's more but you get the idea

lol good catch silly religion dummies

No wonder God gets annoyed with you people.

>optimises personal and societal wellbeing becuase of natural tendencies rooted in evolutionary development
>"nooo, muh metaphysical morality"

>ebin logical fallacy
umm... sweetie you do know that they are just a dumb meme, right?

I wasn't persuading any of you. I challenged you to persuade me.

>waah waah, it's impossible!

No it's not. You are just a brainlet and wrong.

>The atheist says while supporting social engineering programs to undermine and alter natural tendencies rooted in evolutionary development
You can run from, but you cannot hide your hypocrisy, and you certainly cannot escape from it.

That's what I was referencing.

autism

> this is actually a thing

Dang, I thought the big lebowski movie was just being silly, I didn't know there was an actual thing they were poking fun at.

>Trying to jew god himself

This is insane. When you go to such lengths to avoid doing "work" that facilitating these needs becomes a full time job for people. What the actual fuck

wow
that all sounds like a lot of work.

yeah i think jews have been like that for a long time
uphold the letter of the law but ignore the spirit of the law

My favorite is, since you can't light a fire on the sabbath, an oven where you push a button and at some random time later, the oven starts itself.

The absolute pitiful state of Judaism.