/GAG/ Gym Autism General

feel free to vent about your own or other's autism at the gym. Or judge random strangers on a Taiwanese card game forum. I'll start.
>> see someone benching on smith machine
>> see that someone struggling
>> person gets pined under bar
>> proceed to save would-be Benny's life
>>Benny 2.0 says t-thanks and leaves gym

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How the fuck did someone gets pinned on a smith machine? The whole point of the machine is so ppl don't get pinned

>welcome to a world of retards
By not using the stop bar like your suppose to s3e people do it all the time.

I have a gym buddy that's in my gym every day. He's always doing body weight.

>chink fob student walks into gym
>goes to bench press area
>starts curling the empty barbell while standing on the bench
whatthefuck.png

Must be a culture thing

>the autistic regular walks in
>always wearing the same hoodie
>doesn't say "hi" to anyone
>eyes always on the floor
>earbuds never come out
>he walks to the cage
>wonder if he ever does anything besides squats, deadlifts, and flat bench
>always puts away his plates, wipes down benches, the whole nine yards
>still hasn't said a word in over an hour
>can be found at the water fountain between his sets

it's ridiculous.

are you describing me?

Is this you?

n-no

>be me
>have long time friend who is gym buddy
>there are several qt regulars at gym
>we are at the bar and see them sometimes
>2 of these qts go to the gym at the same time
>gym buddy ends up fucking both of them
>gym buddy just happens to fall into pussy all the time
>idk how he does it
>he ends up alternating weekends with these 2 girls
>they have no clue
>they are on treadmills right beside each other
>I have to act like i dont see them so as to not get gym buddy into a pickle
>working good so far

not really a great story i know. just trying to give out some content for once

Alright this was a low point for me but I'll shoot.
>be me about 3 years ago
>2nd year gymfag, making it
>made friends with 2 dudes at the gym
>used to spot each other and talk shit on the fatties and skellys at the gym but thats about it never worked out together
>like to work out alone anyways so I can go at my own pace
>working out back about to start deadlift
>on a bulk so eating a shit ton of protein (I fell for the protein meme boys)
>got wicked bad protein farts
>hurts like hell super bloated
>leaktoxicgas.exe
>2 dudes approach me and we bull shit back and forth for a min
>surely they can smell it but haven't given any signs
>"wow user are you about to do a back day?"
>"y...yes"
>"dude mind if we join you we've never all worked out together"
>"s...sure"
>still to this day wonder why I didn't just say I work out solo
>do a couple warm up sets
>stomach churning like crazy
>load up lmao3p8
>do my first set
>half way through set can't hold it in anymore
>blast a massive Hiroshima sized cart out my ass
>"holy shit user did you just shit yourself bro thay smells God awful?"
>try to play it off like a joke
>spaghetti spewing from every orifice
>try to play it off sarcastically so I try and push another fart out
>ohshit.jpeg
>fill my compression shorts full of actual shit
>there is a noticeable bulge in my ass
>it smells like colon cancer mixed with aids and death
>as I gather my shit to run out it starts leaking down my leg
>Hear everyone laughing
>cancel my membership and never go back

Thankfully the people who ran the place were super understanding and didn't charge me any extra bull shit for breaking contract. And thats why I stopped working out for 3 years and lost all my gains

Is this autism?

>regular enough looking dude in his 30's/40's enters gym
>shorts, vest, bandana on head, whole 9 yards
>manlet though
>guy starts doing farmers walks up and down the gym with 2 heavy plates in each hand
>proceeds to do this for like 10 minutes with regular breaks in between
>wraps a towel around his waist and just starts getting changed right in the middle of the weight room
>probably takes him like 15 - 20 minutes to get dressed and get organised
>fucker spent more time changing his clothes and styling his hair than actually working out
>he leaves
>what the fuck just happened

I have a group of Chinese FOB in my gym. They do shit that coaches told them to do + they lift shit weights

But I can understand. In China, nobody talks about lifting, probably. In the West, it's totally different. I knew the basics even before wanting to lift.

You got to be lying man

If you have to ask if it's autism. It's autism.

>tiny pinoy dude lifting
>all the variations of curls + DB overhead press
>17lb DB
>flexes and fondles his arms between sets

I wish my man I fucking wish this wasn't true. Now anytime I need to fart at the gym I always go sit on the toilet. I get so nervous every time my stomach moves

This is the opposite of autism

>sign up for college gym
>been going a year
>dudes start acknowledging me and shake with me hands even though i don't understand when it is appropriate to go for the handshake
>monthly pay is tiny but sometimes i forget to pay and the dudes that are sort a in charge there forget to ask for it as well
> xmass holidays it is closed but whateves head back right when they open at the beginning of January
>enter the gym think about greeting the dude extend hand but he didn't see since i did it right when he turned around and his friend stood in front
>think i should follow for a handshake and ask about the monthly pay or if i should pay
>he ask "yeah probably should pay"
>i respond "oh but i payed i don't usually skip monthly pay "
>he aks "how many times did you pay this year"
>Forget that the new year has started so I say "oh i payed like twice already or something"
>its january...

This is how i build my own gym at the garage.

Me
>get annoyed when Chads do shit like db curls and rows in front of the db rack
>get visibly angry when people leave db in random places and not their designated position on the rack
>will call someone out for standing in the bar path or touching the bar during or right before a lift.
>have to reorganize weights on power rack before lifting or else I can't change weights fluidly.
>only play slow/love songs during db pullover to make me stretch and hold longer.

>Doing leg raises
>specific area of the gym to do them in, with pull up bars, different hanging grips, etc (climbing gym)
>hot guy starts doing pull ups next to me
>Seen him around, very cute
>catch him staring at my ass
>smile at him
>finish set and let go
>immediately trip over the stool I was using as I land
>immediately trip over the ropes after tripping over stool
>Say "well that was dumb"
>say this out loud, to myself
>haven't seen him since

My life with him is over but at least I don't care enough that I can still go to that gym. Just have to go at night now, instead of the morning.

>tfw thanksgiving is coming up and I use the gym on my university campus
>all I can think about is how I'm going to miss half my workout that week

This can't be real. No fucking way.

Also the protein meme?

Saw a guy doing this lift with a 100lbs weight except he was lying down on a bench and lifting the dumbbell over his face.

If he accidentally dropped the weight or didn't have the strength to move it after a rep he would have smashed his fucking face in. He was wearing a hoodie so I couldn't see how big he was but why the fuck would you risk smashing your face in for a garbage tricep workout?

I wish my man I fucking wish this wasn't true. Now anytime I need to fart at the gym I always go sit on the toilet. I get so nervous every time my stomach moves

Holy shit that image lmfao

has that guy shaved his fucking pits?

>sunday afternoon
>the only other guy leaves soon after I come
>it's my time again
>doing Patrick Bateman dance with plates
>using all machines for curls
>going all crossfit on the pull-up bar
>pretty much behave like this youtube.com/watch?v=OYs5NGw2EYc

What a fucking austistic retard

>what is a deload week?

Are you talking about me? I do ohp too

Dumb phoneposter

>big gym rat doing lat raises in this small crowded gym
>be manlet me want to get past him
>try squeeze under his left arm
>he stops and lets me go through
>looks at his gym friend and smirks
>never come back to that gym again after a year or so

this is peak loved it
i want to be that big

Thinking I need more than 1 gram of protein per lb of body weight.
At that time I was eating about 2g per lb and had cut my carbs way back so I could still hit my macros

DELET

Sorry man some of us have a little thing called work.not everybody sits around at home on a computer all day dreaming about being fit meanwhile looking like a beached whale

...

can't argue with that

>be me
>starting my workout yesterday evening with some good old atg squats 5x5.
>left house without panties - there would be no harm in freeballing
>first 4 sets no problem
>sweats a little tight
>ok last set
>1 :D
>2 :D
>3 :D
>4 D:
>my sweats couldnt take the atg.
>RIIIIIIIP
>balls flop out
>up we go
>"i should really rerack this weight and tuck everything back in"
>"but then again i am on my last rep - must finish set"
>dooooown we go
>balls and dick flop out
>oh dear
>stand up
>rerack
>continue working out for the next hour with hoody tied around my crotch like a diaper.
pic related

yes

Who the fuck doesn't

>panties

?

Manlet, is that you, I see you at my gym you creepy fuck, always there in the corner 'mirin me.

??

What kind of panties do you wear?

>not wearing your sister's panties
ISHYGDDT

I have my own, tyvm.

I have my own sister too, what's the problem?

>not wearing the panties you found in a laundry place, and decided to take home for fap, but used them for gym instead.

never gonna make it lads

>not using them to fap and wearing them to the gym
Never gonna make it

t. dude who's gotten pinned in smith machine before. had to scream for help and wait for the dude next to me to skip tracks on his iPod so he'd hear me.
Switched to free weight bench right after. Figured I'd rather make a bunch of racket dropping plates if no spotter, than die if no one hears me

>fapping before going to gym

might as well do cardio too, right?

>not doing cardio in only panties
Never gonna make it.

use pins, brainlet

you got me there lad

>protein meme

pins would stop me before full ROM, chestlet

>the jigaboo that uses weightlifting straps, knee wraps, elbow warps and weightlifting belt just to do chest flys and dumbbell curls...

>2017 is the year of being open minded everybody!
>so a trap joins my gym
>face of woman, hair of woman, voice of man, body of man, wears lots of women's makeup and jewelry etc.
>name is Luna
>lifts heavy ass weights and grunts like a man
>intimidates/ frightens me with It's presence
>watch to see which bathroom It uses
>watch It walk into womens' locker room
>safely assume Luna is a female bodybuilder
>go into mens' locker room this past weekend
>I'm pissing in a urinal
>Luna walks into mens' locker room
>WHAT THE FUCK IS [she] DOING IN HERE?!?
>Luna steps up to urinal that's 2 urinals down from me
>Luna takes out It's dick and proceeds to piss into the urinal

I'm not sure if I should tell the staff or call my parents to tell them I'm scared.

Fear of death is a strong motivator to finish your rep

>2 years
>lmao3pl8
> making it
Wew lads

I do this but with less weight, easily manageable. I just like the feel of that exercise dude, nothing really gets close to it. Idc if it's efficient or not, gym has to be fun too

what a fucking nerd lmao

Are you sure he's not just doing a pullover badly?

post pic of gym bro pl0x