On this episode of "user goes to a party an leaves alone"

lurk more nigger

no, fuck you

Stay tuned for user gets invited but can't be bothered going
Followed by user meets said party goes at bottle shop and stays out of site

every fucking time

Please delete this post

>His drugs contains calories

how many did you do

Be sure to tune in next week for "user wakes up alone again, then touches himself one more degenerate time"

>user goes out and ends up with a girl because he's too beta to reject her
wouldn't be a problem if i could fug

>going to parties

>user goes to a party and for some reason the girls chatting him up are all fat because buff guys like fat girls except they don't.

>it's the 'user takes a girl home and gets laid because he actually works out instead of just shitposting' episode.

All of them

>favorite show is “user skips the nonsense and hires a prostitute”

That realization made me become a hermit.

>tfw your life is an episode of "user doesn't have any friends and spends all of his free time lifting and browsing Veeky Forums"
what do?

i keep meaning to watch this one but end up just watching another episode of "user masturbates"

Fuck this hits far too close

>he isn't watching "user drops in on a friend's party for 5 minutes and leaves when his old classmates from high school start recognizing him"
There's a reason I haven't talked to you people in 2 and a half years.

Tonight on
>she got a boyfriend but you still care about her so it fucks you up royally and you still think about her
starting, yours truly,
user

i would also like to know if theres a sequel to this episode

When I think back now to when I lived at my parents and did nothing but lift, Veeky Forums and vidya/tv shows/movies, it seemed like a better, simpler time. I could focus soley on me and do what I want. Mostly I was desperate for a gf at those times but now as I type this, in my house with my gf, I want to go back to how I was. Maybe mostly because I don't feel like my gf is a real partner, I can't rely on her for anything and she shows no real compassion toward me. It feels like we're roommates at this point.
My point is the grass isn't always greener. But also be very wise when you start seeing a girl, they are different to how they act when they first meet you.

oh yeah, im on this episode for over a month now

pretty good one, altough gets stale by now.

Just try fuck her and move on if it fails

CELLS

>it’s an user goes to bars with friends and friends start talking and hitting on girls and user feels
out of place so he does shots at the bar then walks home alone episode

they play this one every weekend

DELETE THIS

>it’s an user drunk texts his oneitis again episode

>waking up feeling like shit and checking your phone to see the cringey shit you did while drunk
There is no worse horror

truly one of the worst feels

>delete the convo and never talk again

This shit makes me scared I asked out a girl for Halloween and my friend ditched the party he had for me so I panicked and told her I'm having one

>mfw literally yesterday

How old are you?

I'm watching the episode where user has been with his girlfriend for 5 years but wants to sleep with other women. I'm right at the part where he proposed to her.

Pls delet this

>hosted a party last night
>second party I've ever hosted
>not enough people showed to meet my own standards but we had a good turn out and everyone said they had a good time
also that feel when you're a 27yo KV and want to die

On this episode user has a gf, gets laid often but still seduces random hoes on the side.

How do you people do it? Not look at other chicks?

Whenever I go to a party, I just end up outside staring at the stars. I guess I'm just terribly bored of parties. It's always the same thing at every one. Between beer pong and flip cup nobody does anything. I almost always end up outside smoking a cigar and stargazing. Sometimes people join me. I always fool myself into going to another one though. I tell myself that I'll enjoy it. That it'll be different. I think I'm done with them again.

I saw the one where user nearly fucked his friends gf because he's sick of his current gf and now obsesses over the girl that will never be his.

>got invited to birthday
>bd girl and I are the last ones left at the bar
>she's easily an 8
>I live a few stations away while she lives rather close
>asks me if iwant to come over to her flat
>I decline without even thinking about it

What the fuck is wrong with me?

kek

Does it have a pilot episode that shows where shit went wrong? Asking for a friend.

God damn this happens everytime, to make matters worse I walk across a long bridge where a lot of people jump every year

Don't sweat it. I blew my chance at fucking my highschool crush in a similar way. I still regret not going through with it, but then i remember i didn't have a condom with me and i probably saved myself a shitload of trouble by not fucking her raw.

>oh no I'm not an ultra-chad that makes girls wet wherever I go
This goes for 95% of the fucking male population, yet since the dawn of time they've managed
How about you work on getting people to be actively attracted

Literal fox and grapes

I think by now I was just fucking terrified that after 25 years someone showed something that might've been interest in me.

I’m watching “the girl I should be dating is celebrating 6 months with her dyel douchey bf” hahaha fuck me right love this episode

I don't deny it. She did get around though, so i dodged an std or two at the very least.

I haven't been to a party since I was 19.

>being out of highschool
>going to parties
pick one LOL

>not doing chin-ups
What a pleb.

sickening

>it's an "user cheaps out and buys a fat middle-aged hooker that smells like cigs and fast food but still nuts in 5 minutes episode"
good ep

hey I've watched that episode every day for the past three years, it sure is good huh

>It's another season of "oneitis is dating a stronger and more handsome guy so user tries to lift the pain away"

>it’s another user gets into shit with his gf (now ex) and all he can think about is getting to the gym before it closes tonight episode

>oneitis

pathetic

But I'm not here to troll and make you feel bad

Listen to the advice of literally anyone who knows what they're talking about: HAVE SEX WITH 10 OTHER GIRLS AND YOU WON'T GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE

How can you be so attached to a girl you've not even slept with? It's pathetic

underrated post

>I guess I'm just terribly bored of parties
don't blame the party as boring, it's YOUR fault

why does everyone else enjoy the party? And no, it's not because they're dumb and you're smart

I used to say the same things about going out getting drunk and going to parties

You'll enjoy yourself when you get out of your own head and experience living in the moment. It's easier said than done but know that there is nothing wrong with you that prevents you enjoying parties.

Get laid a few times and you'll get on a roll and start enjoying the chase a bit more

Same goes for everyone else in this thread: it's your own CHOICES that make you miserable/alone/unable to enjoy parties/unable to meet women. There's nothing wrong with you per se, you've just convinced yourself that you're different and can't be happy

I don't know how else to get this across to you but I can relate because I remember posting on here a few years back similar things

Once you get on a roll of good luck your confidence will grow and the snowball of happiness will get rolling. But you have to make the effort (and no, lifting by yourself isn't effort. Talking to people and enjoying their company is making an effort)

Well, not really, I have found a research claiming that over 60% of males that have ever lived never reproduced. Do you fucking understand it? Out of your 10 male friends, 6 won't raise their own children. This is the eternal cuckoldry.

>it's an user is so bereft of female contact that he goes on fucking /soc/ and tries to talk to girls seven years his junior on Kik and Snapchat episode

I don't like where this series is headed tbqh lads.

>tfw your "friends" only go to faggy clubs
I just wanna chill at home with some like minded people

Clubs can be fun if you enjoy dancing and don't pay any mind to anyone but yourself & your friends

Every time I go out.

I hate dancing, used to go clubbing all the time but I just don't find it fun anymore but them sad fucks think it's the be all end all

>it's an user breaks his year and a half dry spell with a fucking threesome, episode

When will it be my turn?

>20th season of "i'm just in a dry spell guys" is starting in a less than a month.

Anybody have a tinder guide? Can I get laid even though I'm bulking?

I absolutely despise tinder. It gives women way too much power.

That being said, there's literally zero downsides to trying, except maybe a slight ego beating

>slight

>get number from girl
>no text back

How do they have power if I have nothing to lose? Gf I loved left me, I want to fuck other women to spite her

Tinder is all about looks.
If you have a good looking face, and are reasonably fit, go for it.
If not, don't bother, it'll just fuck up your self-esteem whem even the biggest landwhale nexts you.

>walks back home in a drunken melancholy

>it's another episode of "user has no friends so he doesn't go out and do things, which means he stays a shut-in, which means he doesn't meet people to be friends with or date, which means he has nothing to talk about to make himself interesting to people, which also means he stays a virgin and the older he gets the more humiliated he is and doesnt want to subject himself to the humiliation of not knowing what to do with a girl in his 20s" episode

when will this series get cancelled already

Girls get literally 100's of matches a day. It boosts their ego like crazy, and makes them think every guy on tinder is beneath them. A guy has to put in so much work to get success, where a girl just picks the cutest guy theyve matched with at whim

If you're willing to play that game, you may have success

Whenever youre ready for the next step

>Begin liking girl
>Talk her down from suicide
>She falls in love with me
>We spend 8 months together
>She falls asleep in my arms every night and kisses my neck in her sleep
>She is studying abroad in Singapore for a year and we both agreed the distance would be impossible
>A month from today is the last day she'll be mine
>Today she got me a present but then burst into tears talking about how much she's going to miss me
>Four more weeks

No, dude this one hurts. It's probably for the best tho. Make the best of those months man

If you exclude war victims and other premature deaths the percentage goes down a lot I presume

>just get laid a few times bro

Up next on user's Life, user remembers that he hasn't had any friends for 6 years, and has never had a gf

How do I STOP getting invited to parties? I hate large social gatherings and spending ridiculous amounts of money just to get uncomfortably shitfaced. But for some reason I keep getting invited by Chads and social butterflies even though I just want to be left alone.

Hey, at least she's going somewhere where the men are short and weak.

>baby's 1st relationship

>pffft why aren't you guys jaded and detached like me, lol fkn nerds, just go smash some puss lol fuck roasties amirite
I do not envy you, user

How old are you guys?
I remember in my late teens thinking this way. I'd go to a party, pick out my best clothes, buy alcohol etc and instead of enjoying myself, I'd think the entire time about how I wasnt having sex with the hottest girl there. I'd compare myself to the 2 chads who did get laid, the couple of guys there with their gfs, and ignore the fact that 90% of the guys there werent getting pussy.

You will NEVER get any with this mindset. Youre at a party to be with your mates, get drunk, do stupid shit and just be around girls. You might get laid 0/10 parties at first. Eventually it might happen. It gets easier from then on, and yes by the end of college, hooking up may be a standard part of a night out.

You have to work your way there unless youre in the top 1% of men. Even so, chads go home empty handed all the time. Stop being so hard on yourselves, you are delusional and incredibly insecure.

Piss off incel