>be me
>virgin
>body shaped like bowling pin
>senior year weight training
>lurk Veeky Forums every day to learn the alpha basics from all the chads
>mad gains over 6 months
>not up to Veeky Forums standards but clear cut from normies
>uni starts
>stop hitting the gym, too much uni work
>still playing vidya with friends 5-8 hours a day
>on the verge of failing first semester
>on discord server full of virgin friends
>one day posts summer hiking photos to show friends
>gets msg from 8/10 qt mod from discord server
>"is that you on the right in the photo user?"
>yea it's me, oh sorry i know was suppose to post on private chat, i'll remove it
>"lol it's ok, where were you hiking? It looks gorgeous, mind showing me more photos?"
>sends her half a dozen scenery pics
>"wow...user...it's...really beautiful there..."
>autism fades and realize what's happening
>somehow salvages the situation
>sends me pic related saying she planned to visit my city in a few days anyways and needed a place to stay
>shiet i aint gonna dodge pussy flying at me
>fast forward 1 month at the airport
>she's literally 5'3" 100 lbs (im 5'11 195 lbs call me a manlet)
>talks about how surprisingly not disappointed with each other in terms of physical appearance
>arrive at condo nervous as fuck
>awkward-slience.m4a
>looks at each other
>looks at bedroom door
>start undressing like our clothes were on fire
(1/3)
Veeky Forums is my only friend
>tfw suddenly remember lil jimmy never caught anything but these hands before
>so nervous cant get it up
>she slaps me in the face and pushes me onto the bed
>diamonds
>fuck like filthy animals
>next day
>friends from same discord server come over to play some vidya
>among them is my best friend i've known since 6th grade, lets call him Raj (he's brown)
>Raj sees girl walking around in my pjs
>suddenly his face was as if somebody walked by and spat on his overpriced halal dog
>"YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE STAYING AT A HOTEL?!?!"
>Raj goes apeshit and i was the zookeeper with no bananas
>rest of friends bails inc drama after realizing what was happening
>im more confused than i was on my last linear algebra test
>Raj started throwing really personal/hurtful comments like calling her e-slut
>girl snaps and goes on about how she still stayed friends with him all this time and how she flew in to visit anyways
>shit so heated i cant even breathe
>minutes later Raj storms out the front door
>girl slams bedroom door and start crying under the blankets
>i walk up to attempt to comfort her
>bitch hugging an army gut knife (i can tell because it looked exactly the same as the csgo knife skin)
>whatthefucknotinmyzoo.png
>tells her to put the knife away this is still my house woman
>starts bawling her eyes out again with knife in hand
>goes on about how she was abused as a child, constantly harassed during her time in the army so she feels calmer around her knife, she has schizo grandparents and how the genes skip a generation so that's why her mother isn't going crazy, and everything goes to shit in her life
>"user i love you please don't leave me please"
>i start praying
>later calm her down with a few drinks while she rambles on
>downs all my vodka when I left to buy dinner
>find her passed out on the couch
>wash my face, clear my mind, looks in the mirror and just started to realize
>after crawling for a year and walking for 18, this is officially the most massive shit i've steped on thus far
>book an early flight back for her without telling her
>delete and block everything related to her
>can't sleep, clocks tickin just count the hours
>only 2 hours til flight
>I pack all her shit and carry her to my car
>drive to airport and unload all her shit in front of terminal entrance
>carry her to the nearest seat and set all her luggage beside her
>airport employee approach me out of serious concern
>"Sir, what is going on?"
>instant cold sweat all over my back dripping into my asshole
>oh hello mate, nice weather we're having eh? My friend's a little passed out from some crazy shit last night you know what i mean, can you just wake her up in 10 mins and hand her this ticket? Im already super late to my meeting so thanks a bunch, ur a real life saver u know that big fella, have a good one lad
>airport guy complete shitfaced while i nervously hurry back into my car and slams the gas
After a few days
>apparently the girl friend zoned Raj a while back but he never gave up plus HE already booked HER the ticket so she promised she'll come hang out with him and told him she's staying at a hotel
>so by losing my virginity i also unknowingly cucked my best friend
>uninstall every video game
>uninstall steam
>uninstall discord
>sell my ps4
>start going to classes on time and getting decent grades
>hit the gym 5 days a week and count calories everyday
>lost all my friends since we only play games together
>can't find any hobbies to fill the void
>can't make any friends and no one to talk to outside Veeky Forums
got my shit together and still feel empty as fuck
THERE IS NOTHING AFTER Veeky Forums WHAT THE FUCK HELP
good night Veeky Forums
1. Stop lying
2. See you in three days
you should have
1.) shot that lying bitch down as soon as you found out what she did to your friend
2.) call an ambulance for here while she goes skitzo then leave
3.) apologize to your fucking friend , tell him the truth that you didnt know you where cucking him and try to make things right
you broke the golden rule and put hos before bros now you don't have either
>>apparently the girl friend zoned Raj a while back but he never gave up plus HE already booked HER the ticket so she promised she'll come hang out with him and told him she's staying at a hotel
not your fault user, your friend is a faggot.
>not continuing to stick your dick in crazy
Retard
>>i start praying
Wise move mr zookeeper. Good story.
offer raj your boypussy op, win win
raj detected
Join an outdoors club the people there are much more stable and easygoing
Plus the qtp2t's there are way more worth it
How old are you and what country do you live in? I'll be your friend..?
Veeky Forums skype group when?
tl,dr
this
Friendzoning happens, it's not zookeeper's fault Raj doesn't have any other women in his life.
Blue board, homie.
>book an early flight back for her without telling her
you paid for her flight back? wtf
Op on phone, Toronto canada
This was a really great coming of age story. I’d be sorry that your first time was so mired in drama, mental illness, and potential threat to your life, but at the same time, how many men can say that they lost their virginity to such a sexy, perky crazy girl who looks like that, while simultaneously having the experience play out in such a wild way that it gets them to drop all the bullshit in their life and start acting like and adult.
This experience already has and will continue to make you a much better person. Congrats on the wild virginity loss. Never forget it or the many lessons about women, friends, video games, college, and pajeets that it has taught you.
I actually did this, the club just adds me to a email list and the events are all far away and cost like 100$ per trip for like a weekend, plus all strangers there is it worth going? Just randomly show up?
Mirin hard, that literally my goal body. If thats you what your routine brah
>bros before hos
That's gay as fuck Raj no wonder you got friendzoned
>stop hitting the gym, too much uni work
>still playing vidya with friends 5-8 hours a day
stopped reading there
not me user, was another user who posted here, he'd been training for 10 years had a 220kg squat, did PPL and HIIT 3 x a week, and could bench 125kg for 3 he also didn't deadlift, thats all i remember
I sorta fucked up by going awol on him it’s been like half a year since this shit happened
FUCK OFF WITH YOUR FAKE STORIES FAGGOT I HOPE YOU GET CANCER
Get a job dude. You get paid to hang out with people. If you're fit, people will initially respect you.
Then you missed the part at the end where the experience led to him dropping all video games and doubling down on school and the gym. Go finish the story.
THIS IS A BLUE BOARD
MOOOOOOODS
nice blog
So Raj got friendzoned but couldn't accept it? Not your fault. Maybe your friend should be happy for you because you lost your v-card.