Read about onions being the next superfood on Veeky Forums

>read about onions being the next superfood on Veeky Forums
>basically free legal test
>drive to my nearest Krogers to buy myself some onions
>arrive, apparently there's a special going on select produce, onions being one of them
>50 cents a pound special
>niggathatscashmoney.png
>bring two carts to the onion section
>the produce manager walks out confused as I load two full carts full of bags of onions
>asks me if I'm okay
>"Gonna get big son"
>the cashier's eyes widen to the size of the onions when she turns around and sees I'm loading up the belt with 40 bags of onions
>calls over two courtesy clerks to help her drag all the god damn onions
>I watch and picture myself getting big as the store director walks up and asks me for my ID
>of course I show him, he'll remember me when I come in next time all swollen up with muscle
>check line closed until they can get my order, I pay with only quarters
>walk back triumphantly to my car with two grocery carts filled with onions
>arrive home and now I just realized they taste fucking disgusting

I can't just go back and refund them all, what should I do?

That reminds me, I need to buy some onions.

Kek

>they taste fucking disgusting
stopped reading there

Fucking top Kek, user.

Don't be a pussy. Better finish what you start.

go and return the onions, then film it for us you dickweed

Put them in a blender and drink them down.

>falling for the onion meme
Fine by me, more chicks for the rest of us.

Good thing it's the end of his post fucking creting.

Buy some leeks and shallots then. Learn, react, adapt, overcome

You fucked up. You need to find a wholesale place and buy the onions direct. Cut out the middleman grocer markup.

...

I could probably eat 40lbs of onions worth of french onion soup. That like, what, four cups of soup?

bitch I could eat an onion straight up even with the dry skin

>taking the metabait

>fell for the onion meme
>grab an onion
>peel the skin
>get comfy on the couch with my fresh peeled onion
>take that first bite and imagine the raw gains from three times the test
>hmm not too bad, no real flavour
>then the burning starts
>fumes from the wound in the onion then seep into my eyes
>can't even keep my eyes open
>mouth is burning
>tears streaming
>remember I gotta do this every day for forever now

>onion wholesaler

Like a farmer?

Or, stop being a barbarian, cut the damn thing, then eat it in slices

...

Not him but I am eating an onion raw like an apple right now. Same shit is happening but deep down I know these tears are all the estrogen leaving my body.

Chew gum. It alleviates the burning.

t. chef

If this were true, I'd say donate them to some local charity that feeds the homeless, they'll probably use it in stews or soups or somesuch.

>taste fucking disgusting
fucking loser. good thing you soyboys don't breed, onionlads will inherit the earth

enough memeing with raw onion juice

>the cashier's eyes widen to the size of the onions
You were annoying me until this

>not buying vidalias
LIKE NIGGA HOW DUMB DO YOU HAVE TO BE NOT TO GET SWEET ONIONS AHAHAHAHAH NOT EVEN PIGS WILL EAT THE BIG YELLOW ONES

High quality thread

no pain no gain

>taking the meta metabait

> The cashier's eyes widen to the size of onions
Kek.

>you
>me

>be me
>ate a whole onion raw on sunday
>fap today
>dick is a lot harder than normal, throbbing
>shoot a massive rope of cum, which reaches my chest
>3-4x the amount of cum as normal, pearly white
this shit actually works

My cum is significantly whiter too, desu.

We're all going to make it, boys.

>which reaches my chest
mate that's weak.
I've accidentally cummed on my own face hundreds of times.

>accidentally

>cut them into pieces
>throw them in a pan with some olive oil
>get them nice and brown
>optionally add some zucchini and tomatoes

Tastes fucking great, just add this to every meal you eat and viola.
But ofc OP is just shit posting.

Same, I always have to stand up and go to the toilet when I cum otherwise it'll get in my fucking hair.

One time my mouth was open and it even got in there, made me feel disgusting.

But now that I'm /onion/ I'll report back with results.

I need to know what is the deal with onions all of a sudden.
There was some saying it was a lie set up by /leftypol/ and other people like that to trick people.
Now it's a thing all of a sudden, and what is the real consensus of this shit?
My mother always used, and still uses onions to make all her food. Onions, and onion powder. It's been like this my entire life. What's that look like?

Since cooking destroys the allicin in onions, you won't be getting those dank onion gains.

It's been shown to boost test 300% in rats by eating the equivalent of 1 onion a day in humans.

It's not a meme, it's legit. The media is already up in arms about it and is legitimately shilling against it.

Last year I fucked my gf, pulled out and it went on her pillow, pretty much from january this year until now, it's been really disappointing, atleast the onion helped

Don't eat them raw. Fry them in the pan with every meal

You have to eat them raw or you'll lose their benefits, soyim

...

In rats, wow.
It's a meme, nothing else. Get fucking real.

>missing out on free allium gains because you're afraid of "falling for a meem"

>niggathatscashmoney.png

fucking lost it

onion pepper and ham sandwiches for days.
hav to cut up an extra half an onion when i'm cooking because i accidentally eat too much before i actually start cooking.
onion and garlic should be used in every dish that you cook.

>onion and garlic should be used in every dish that you cook.

bet you smell great