I'm 6'0", 125 lb DYEL depressed low test lanklet loser. I've been hitting the gym, while trying to gain weight...

I'm 6'0", 125 lb DYEL depressed low test lanklet loser. I've been hitting the gym, while trying to gain weight. I've given up on having even an average looking body for a while, let alone looking Veeky Forums. I'll never have a gf, and quite frankly, I hope I'm dead within the next decade. I just want to gain a little weight so my friends and family can stop calling me a fucking weak loser.

What are some tips for a gym noob like me for workouts?

eat more food

eat till you're sick, and then eat an hour later

wash food down (drink of water with food still in mouth), this is how you eat more

eat more

For a couple of months I've been eating as much as I can without my stomach hurting or wanting to take a nap.

that's wrong, eat past the point of your stomach hurting, eat until you fall asleep at the table

either you are underneath 3% bodyfat and malnourished, or you are lying about your height, or your weight. i suppose you could actually have some sort of thyroid issue, or tapeworms, but it's much more likely you're eating 1500 calories a day thinking it's "so much"

count your calories, eat till you die

t. somebody who was 6'1" 140lbs three months ago

What weight are you now?

170

you'll gain almost 20lbs from water weight and glycogen retention within two weeks

Any things you can suggest you ate?

everything dude, you are literally a fucking walking skeleton. whole milk is good but you shouldn't rely on it or you'll blow out your biliary system since your body isn't used to digesting so much saturated fat

nuts, lots of nuts of any kind, plenty of eggs, broccoli, your favorite meat

protip: peanut butter dissolves in any amount of liquid

Yeah like ive been taking mass gainer went from 120lbs to 143 now. But this shits probably not great for me, don't want to take it for another year.

Ok cool man ill up my snacking cycle. Peanut butter and nuts.

gainer is just carbs and protein, as long as you get enough fiber, and the protein is complete, you can live on it forever, it's just not the best for your mental state or gastrointestinal health

the trick to nutrition is hitting your protein timing (~30g protein every 2-3 hours), getting a balanced fat profile, all your micronutrients, and gut flora health (buy some greek yogurt)

won't you put on a bunch of body fat doing this?
t. 6'4, 155lbs

"a bunch"?

do you mean like, 5% in 6 months? yeah sure, that's fine, because the starting point is sub 5%, not to mention skeletons don't forget how to not eat, just like how fatties don't forget how to eat too much, meaning cutting should be easy as fuck later on if you overdo the bulk

yeah, I'm 8% right now.
If I go up to 13% just to put on 20lbs, won't that just make look like shit?

if you put on your maximum muscle growth of ~5lbs per month while doing that, won't that be worth it and make you look better than before? especially after a cut? you don't just lose your muscles the day you start cutting fat

how to estimate body fat %

You can't always be sure your TDEE is accurate, and shooting for a high surplus of 700+ insures that an untrained skeleton will have enough calories for his body to repair muscle and CNS. this lower starting bf% also increases initial testosterone meaning skellymode bros have the best noob gains.

Let's also take a second to realize that your skeleton ass would look better with 5% more bodyfat.

I guess, but if I get to 13% body fat @ 175 lbs, and then cut down to 9-10%, I'd probably end up at like 165lbs right?
Is that how it works? You have to continuously cycle between bulk and cut?
I like being sub 10% body fat, and in order to gain 20lbs of basically just lean muscle, that would take years wouldnt it?

have fun trying to perfectly calculate your 500 calorie surplus every single day without already having previous cutting experience. the changes in water weight alone are enough to throw off your calculations to the point where you're doing more math than lifting

unless you devote your entire life to your fitness, i sincerely doubt a hard leanbulk is for you

ok, I get what you're saying I think. Although I do have cutting experience, (more just dieting), as I dropped 10lbs in the past 5 weeks by calorie counting.

I just put my height, weight, waist, hips, neck, etc into a website formula.
Although I get like 4% on one of the calculators and 8% on the other, but I'm pretty sure 8% is accurate.

Surplus of 700? I was aiming at a surplus of 250 initially, is that pointless? The problem I have isn't that I can't eat the amount of calories, but I find it very difficult to get the right macros/micros. It seems impossible to eat surplus calories without overdoing saturated fats and sodium

The thing is that it's easier to cut than to bulk, because when you're putting on muscle you have TDEE to account for that is nearly impossible to measure, such as muscle repair, protein synthesis, etc. The only way to determine it is trial an error over the span of a month or so, with rigorous documentation of intake and output. Cutting and bulking are easy, but doing either very slowly is a much slower and effort filled journey.

Not saying it's out of the question, it's just much easier to keep it simple.

>without overdoing saturated fats and sodium
sodium can be hard to avoid but is easily offset by increased hydration

try to replace saturated fats with unsaturated from nuts, and add more sugars from fruits. the only real reasons to avoid processed sugars is because they lack fiber and because they generally are associated with other, undesirable ingredients like bad oils or chemicals. obviously hit your protein timings, but to hit higher calories, some nuts or oil is a great tool. saturated fats aren't terrible, but you are right to say they should only be a certain percentage of your total fat intake

yeah ok, so at the end of the day if I want to go from 8% body fat @155lbs, to 10% @170-175lbs, the best method is too eat at 700 surplus for like 2 months and then do a small cut?
And I would be lifting weights simultaneously to gain muscle right

If you ate 700 surplus for 2 months there's probably no possible way you could ever gain 20 pounds of fat / muscle. If you gained 20 in two months, it's either all water / glycogen, or...there is no or, the math doesn't add up.

thanks for tips
yeah the main reason I worry about sodium is because it bloats my face quite badly. Before I started eating properly 5 weeks ago, I was having 5000+ mg of salt daily. I've cut that down to 2300mg and increased my water intake.

Do you think its bad to go over my protein mark, because I often eat 200+ grams, even though I've read you only need 0.8g per lb of bodyweight.

Right now, as close as I can calculate I get about
200g protein, 85g fat, 25g sat fat, 250g of carbs, 80g sugar, 2300 mg of sodium on average each day.
That's only about 2600-2700 calories, however to eat at a ~700 surplus I need to get up to 3200-3300 calories

>6'4"
>155lbs
>worried about getting fat
what the fuck dude just eat until you can't eat anymore, you need weight, you won't get fat. if you do get fatter than you want to be, that's when you start looking into cutting. just worry about your next meal for now, skellybro.

your body can process ~30g of protein every digestion cycle (~2-3 hours). hit that timing, and you're golden on protein, any extra is metabolized into calories. the only thing to consider is that studies show the less of your daily caloric intake is from protein, the more tesotosterone is produced. ideally you want only ~20% of your calories to be from protein, which is rarely ever an issue even at levels close to 200g, since protein is pretty damn low in calories compared to how many are in fats, and how many grams of carbs are in carb heavy foods.

check your micros too, some things like zinc, b12, selenium, phosphorous, and organosulfides can be difficult to get. (yes, the best source of sulfides are.......onions, and pretty much only those)

pure ideology

yeah, I'm coming from a BDD background, but the opposite kind to most guys here though

cheers, so does a diet of
215g protein, 320g carbs, 80g fat sound roughly ok?
As well as keeping sat fat in check and sodium and taking vitamins

an ideaology backed by experience, with a little actual understanding sprinkled in considering im t. former lanklet

push your carbs as high as possible but yeah looks like a pretty simple 3-2-1 ratio, really standard, get varied fats and plenty of fish oils, lots of fiber too. look into types of proteins and try to utilize casein before bedtime

I find it really difficult to find carbs without sugar though. Should I just disregard sugar when it comes to putting on weight?

sugar doesn't matter. all food ingested that your body designates to caloric consumption is broken down into sugar anyway, it's just that your body doesn't use carbs for other things as much as the way it utilizes proteins and fats.

the only essential aspect to carbs are the glycemic index, which basically means don't eat a single meal a day or an entire bag of candy at once, and including fiber, else you'll have issues with your lower digestive tract

you're literally retarded. gut transit rate slows to match absorbtion. max absobtion is in the 50,000 kcal/day neighborhood

at no point did i mention absorbtion rate, i mentioned protein utilization, sure saying "process" was a bit mislabeled, but my intention was clear from the following explanation

thanks again man, very helpful

Take steroids

You need to give yourself to a higher cause, user. I’m not going to say what that is necessarily because you need to find it yourself. I promise you that when you find it your life will be filled with meaning again. You’re aiming at the mundane at the moment.

wanna hear the most retarded thing in the world?

>office job
>8 - 10 hours a day sitting
>gf left me after 4 years
>parents divorced
>father gone
>best friends betrayed me
>friends gone
>brother moves to different city
>gets new gf
>brother gone
>discoveringweed.exe
>cocoon mode for a year
>suddenly depression
>thinking bout suicide for a month straight
>decide to become a bigger man and start working out again
>depression was gone after 3 fucking days

im not even kidding you.
I had NO fucking motivation for anything - the smallest tasks, especially if they involved communication with other people, were almost impossible for me to handle.
I would wake and bake every single day and ask myself what the fuck i did wrong.
Then i started working out again.
3 days later everything didn't seem that bad.

I guess its easy to confuse a lack of movement or boredom with depression

modern minds have innate survival instinct, but the modern body has lost such a thing, leaving a disconnect between the two. reattaching them is the first step, good on you user

Eat like a motherfucker. When I was young I used to lift but ate like a faggot and what happened to my body? I barely even got to ottermode, the gains were pathetic. Now I'm much older and eat really well and my gains are insane. Just seeing how much muscle I gained and how much my body has changed in little time since I got my diet right made me realize that I wasted many years of my youth. Don't do the same mistake. Don't waste your time.

Peanut butter works wonders. The bread I use is 110 cal a slice, 2tbsp of PB is 190 cal. So that's 300 cal per slice. I eat three of those, that's an easy 900 cal with no cooking. It's perfect for when I feel lazy and don't want to make anything.