How do I fix myself?

>aged 27
>no female attention ever, no friends since school
>only ever done anything with escorts
>never been to pub, club or party
>gfless, dateless, lossless, everythingless
>live in the UK so this cringey "JUS BE YOUR BEST SELF BRO OWN IT BRO SEMPER FI BRO TALK TO PEOPLE EVERYWHERE BRO" shit does not work and you have no hope if you have no friends
>lived on my own in London for almost 9 months and nothing has changed
>lifted heavy weights for many years (4 plate squat) and nothing changed
>became the ugly loser loner beta autist nobody talks to after one day of my current office job (also in all previous jobs)

"Dude, how could you not X?"

Because I am not a normie with 50 friends who can go to clubs and talk to drunk women. And because I have a sub chad face which makes online dating hopeless

I would say die a virgin like Jesus but it's too late for that.

Just go up to random people and ramble about stupid shit, then take a dump on the ground and abruptly leave

relationships are overrated anyway, and if your only ambition in life is to get a gf then you will forever be single.

Where in London are you?

If being yourself hasn't worked then I guess you need to be someone else. Do something you normally wouldn't do.

Just go join a team fucking sport. for fucks sake its not hard. Even a martial art will give you a friend group. Its so fucking easy

ree jus b urself normie

>boohoo pity me
You're 27. A grown man, crying on a basket weaving forum like a child. Have you ever considered that people don't see you the way you pathetically see yourself?? Or that maybe just maybe you have no friends because of that shite personality and mentality you have? You don't need to be "chad" to have friends and a gf user. Work with what you have.

Dunno if this is a thing across the pond but here in the US the "young republicans/democrats" groups are chock full of super awkward 20-40 year olds and they all seem to get along really well. Some of them don't even care about politics, it's just something to do.
t. work in politics, frequently go to young republicans events to recruit interns

I don't think I've ever read something so unfunny in my entire fucking life

Just get a Tinder account and start slaying puss.

thats a thing in england, taking a dump in someones porch or front yard

Drink caffeine. Talk to people. Don't jack off too much.

How long have you been at your job. Same age group as you?
Find out if people like to hike or whatever easy hobby there is to get into.

Winter- want to organize a volunteer event. Look up food banks in your area.

New to the area? Ask about winters date ideas. This tells people you are trying to be out and about.

Spring - want to start an office hiking group if anyone is interested. Bring a friend or s/o.

Most people socialize by binge drinking or smoking weed or playing video games in my company. 20-35 year olds. Some actually do the gay stuff like volunteer and hike.

Or just do Muay Thai and tell people you do that even if you suck at it.

Do this except dont do it with co-workers. Never socialise with Co-workers outside of work unless you live in America

>never been to pub
Start there. Just literally go. You might run into someone. At the very least you have to talk to the bartender and order drinks. If you become a regular you'll at least start seeing people more often. Maybe itll become easier to say something. Idk what bar games they have but you could ask someone to play pool, darts etc.

> just become an alcoholic bro

Women, friends, all that won't solve your problem. Be happy with who you are right now and stop striving for all these random conquests to fulfill you. Just fucking be happy, do some meditation, go travel, go see india, see some abject poverty then try to complain, you are privileged man.

I literally fucked a different Chav slut every night when I visited London last year. Hit the pubs and chat up some girls.

At this point, why not? If user is truly alone and friendless why not do some drugs, be an alchoholic, dress weird and go to raves and cons? What the fuck ks there left to lose?

I was in a similar situation during university. I talked to no one, had literally no friends, and sometimes, I would go for weeks without uttering a single word to anyone (self-serve cashiers FTW).

What worked for me was (after doing plenty of research about how human beings communicate), attending classes to learn a foreign language. Being there forces you to talk, and if you study hard, your communication skills in the new language will be better than your peers.

I even met my gf there. I still have no friends, but at least I can talk to people when necessary, and people don't think I'm weird anymore.

Sometimes though, I feel a sting of envy when I see others having fun in multitudes. I wish I could sincerely enjoy non-romantic human companionship.

>If user is truly alone and friendless why not do some drugs, be an alchoholic, dress weird and go to raves and cons?
>What the fuck ks there left to lose?
Everything?

also
>19 replies
>18 posters
OP has abandoned thread

>go travel, go see india, see some abject poverty then try to complain, you are privileged man
You can see poverty in any city in the world without paying thousands of dollars to just go see some street shitters that you'll forget about a month after your trip and you find your own problems engulf you again, if you want to go on a pity feel bad parade just look at some homeless people or poorer neighbourhoods, or watch videos or documentaries on third world countries if you want to feel da white man's burden. You're probably a Pajeet trying to get first world tourism money into your country.

>go to raves and cons
>27
too old.

Because old people hate acid and fucking, amirite?

no but you'll look like an old fart any age past 25.

I'm 34 and get IDed and pass for 22 on Tinder. Sorry about your shit genetics.

its not about the looks, you just gonna look desperate trying to fit in with 18-19 year old kids

you are 34, has some fucking self respect

>date old, ugly used up women instead of girls in their prime

you sound so fucking retarded and beta

>you sound
WHERE OR WHEN DID I SAY THAT YOU CANNOT DATE 18 YEAR OLDS????????????

it doesnt work if you keep a desperate mentality
you gotta be calm and work on your own things
or start drinking and smoking lol

The OP literally is desperate. That is why I told him to go do things.

>JUS BE YOUR BEST SELF BRO OWN IT BRO SEMPER FI BRO TALK TO PEOPLE EVERYWHERE BRO
The 8-16 year old crowd is much more rowdy than any generation. They have grown up watching streamers be perfectly charismatic and immersed in attention. As a 24 year old I'm intimidated by their social maturity, and you should be too. They dominate the conversation everywhere they go and run circles around you. This is a learned skill and they will certainly use it to weed out the weaklings, regardless of age. Don't be that weakling OP or that reputation will follow you. Especially if you want to be a parent someday.

Grow the fuck up OP. Sitting in your bubble whining about being a loser isn't going to cut it anymore. Kids are more mature than you.

>growing up watching streamers jump around means they're more mature

Go to AA meetings and pretend to be alcoholic. You'll find friends there. Plenty of damaged women to fuck as well. Real Fight Club shit.

It's social maturity. Every kid in that age span is an expert socializer. There's no place to hide in 2017 when you're a kid, you're on all of social media carefully maintaining a digital identity and constantly responsible for what you say online. You can throw away a reputation with a few sentences and be laughed into a corner. It's high risk with little reward. Welcome to adulthood, at age 10.

>gets a job

>complains about it

fuck off OP. you had to interview for the job right? they obviously liked you enough to hire you. you have some skill that put you above all other applicants.

do you want to actually look desperate though? Doing desperate things wouldn't help.

You'll naturally start talking to people about your field of study if you actually fucking engage with your course instead of just doing it to make mum and dad proud.

Tbh your best bet is probably online stuff. Practice socializing online, get good at it, then talk to girls and meet up with them once they already like you.

Tons of older people go to rave. Older as in up to 30-35

this

Who the fuck does acid at a rave, seriously.

>That image
>tfw underbite

I hate my bamboozling face. People say I look like a Disney villain. I've been compared to gaston, prince hanz etc.

did you go to pubs by yourself? what did you say to people?

i've been to bars a few times, and girls are always in groups, usually with other guys. too afraid they'll laugh at me, or the guy will intervene in some way

Nigger if you can't outwit a bunch of kids you might be fucking stupid.

Get a new job in a new town and a new Jim. Then you can reinvent yourself as a normie

so leave your shit country of bad teeth and go somewhere else. at least you'll have an accent then. bitches love accents. go get a hobby that isn't lifting. find a sport or something and talk to others that do it

Why not join into activities where yuo can make friends? Work, study, martial arts, language courses, volunteer for something etc...

join crossfit and try to be social.
Use meetup to meet people..
Tinder and Bumble.

Best ya can do friend

Honestly, I'd move to another country and have a fresh start. Go to Eastern Europe or Latin America.

But before you leave you need to learn where you went wrong and what you need to do so you don't make the same mistakes all over again

I live in Belgium and it's the same here. Not all of them, but a lot of young people that are active in political parties are pretty awkward or simply look hideous

I wonder why

unironically get some xans. that shit changed my life and taught me a lot of things I can carry on to sobriety

Get a hobby
Go outside
Force yourself into uncomfortable (for you) social interaction

You will never be a social chad but at least you will get some social gains.

> Maggie de Block

Kek, well she's actually a doctor

please respond

That is the sad part. How can any patiënt take her serious, especially because she is about morbidly obese herself.

I know right. But because of rising relativism and demoralisation we are falsely told to ignore this.

I'd be like trusting an architect whose own house is falling apart because of wrong calculations

Gaston was a total alpha. Hans was going to jew some dumb ice queen's sister out of a whole kingdom. Embrace your caveman face, you fuck.

What does telling people you do muy Thai supposed to achieve?

get drunk before you approach

I'm always seeing some retarded ass new social theory on here, but this is the dumbest one in a while. Watching let's plays and other bullshit on YouTube hasn't turned the youth into socially advanced butterflies. You're just an autist

Asking the same question. I never went to pubs alone but I always wondered how some people manage to pull it off

I honestly think I would be hanging at the bar the entire evening. Clubs would be a different scenario though

What part of London?

I understand what you mean. Here, if you have no friends it's 1000x more difficult to make them. Everything involves alcohol and if you're not an alcohol junkie you're a loner.

>became the ugly loser loner beta autist nobody talks to after one day of my current office job (also in all previous jobs)
lel same. so I said fuck it and got a remote job. Now I can be autistic in peace at home, but it means even less socialisation.