Hi, I'm Brooke. I am a marketing analyst for Apple. What do you do for work?

hi Brooke!
*takes giant breath*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

i met a girl that was almost this hot and worked in [whatever stupid bullshit] at Apple once, but i got cockblocked by her bitchy friend. true story

Hey Brooke
*cums in pants*
Shit, I g-g-gotta go I... eat spaghetti, BYE!

ayo gurl wit dose tiddies lets go around back here and bust dem out rite der sheeeeeit

*stabs her 49 times*

Heh, nothing person roastie cunt

kek

You shouldn't worry about what I do.. but uuhh.. if we get to know each other a little more maybe ill talk about it.

Wait a few months after dating her and tell her you are actually unemployed and a complete loser but thanks for the anal, giving and taking ;)

:^)

Oh that's awesome, I'm in marketing as well, for the bag industry. I know it doesn't sound like much but we've been doing some pretty interesting work. This year we directed a huge amount of energy toward India and boy has it paid off, so far we've catapulted sales through the roof and have helped move nearly 200 billion of product since January, if we can keep the momentum going, and we think we can, we'll be looking at possibly 2 trillion by this time next year.

Oh you love bags? Well this might sound crazy but being in Apple you probably know that China's really stepping up production quality, well right now one company is trying to get this really interesting product off the ground and could in short order be one of the most recognized bag manufacturers in the world. I've actually got some with me that you could try out if you want, how about we grab a drink and I'll run you through it, or we could just skip all that and I'll fuck you in the ass directly, sound good?

Everyone in this board sells bags you faggot

oh yea? analyze this
*unzips dick*

Hey Maj Helix. Its been a while. Seems like you're a little worse for the ware.

>well right now one company is trying to get this really interesting product off the ground

You got chinked please deal with it

who is this chick?

her name is Brooke, shes a marketing analyst for Apple

what a bitch. Most women are after money and they don't even realize it

>he doesn't know Brooke

Hey brooke

Hi Brooke, I'm Broke

I spend most of my time posting pictures online of this pink man with his eyes bleeding.

She would insta suck yo dick. bitches love bags.

look at her left arm, she does heroin

cool. do you have some change?

Eye brows too bushy. Would not do.

They look natural. I hate bitches with those cat eyebrows. Fucking disgusting.

I wanna work that month of yours girl, dam

"meh"

What do I do? I fuck fly girls and puff heaven haze. Not just on the weekends, that's, 7 days. Are you into sexual misconduct?

Brooke / Broke same thing

so broke

The telanovela my mom watches OMG
every
SINGLE
FUCKING
WOMAN
has those STUPID FUCKING DRAWN EYEBROWS

it's like seriously wtf is the matter? GOD NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YA?! JESUS

I hit home runs Brooke. Want to check out my Lambo? It's down this dark alley.

Hey Brooke, I'm the owner of this fucking mansion what the fuck are you doing in my house?

telenovela*

Looks like she's trying to get with him again.
reddit.com/r/happy/comments/7alytj/having_coffee_with_the_one_who_got_away/

>reddit.com/r/happy/comments/7alytj/having_coffee_with_the_one_who_got_away/
Xd

kekked

I am just a humble farmer...

...of Bitbeans.

Kek

hey you dumb fucking stupid fucking slut why don't you get ready to take my fucking cheese crusted dick in your mouth while i choke fuck you against a concrete slab until i crack your damn whore skull in. yeah i'm fucking busy and your goddamn lucky i'm such a fucking operator that I can work from home and take care of the goddamn kid and you at the same fucking time but then you have to open your stupid cunt mouth and spout off some fucking disrespectful shit to me and i cant get one fucking second of fucking peace because you are such a lopsided psycho fucking bitch. you got to take two whole fucking years off life after your last boss killed herself becaus she couldn't fucking deal with you anymore and you decided to be a hero and let her know a person with depression should act that way and guess waht she's fucking dead because of you and while you've been off some stupid fucking mystical journey wasting yoru fucking life i've been supporting your dumb cunt fucking ass and i dont care if your the goddamn mother of my child i am going to fucking hit a bitch through the fuckking wall if you keep being a mouthny little cunt

LMAO

FAG

Currently unemployed, claiming free virtual money in faucets. I make about $0.30 a day, but that's just the beginning.

even if joking this person needs therapy

This is the first pump group I'm actually making money with --> discord.gg/svrKKHc Join us and make some sweet percentages with us. We got LUN, GUP, MCO and BITB last weeks and they all were major success!

This is your average BTC "investor". Time to sell faggots.

I wonder what she smell like.

With all seriousness - you need some help man. These kinds of thoughts are not normal, and you are making it worse by exercising this "creative" outlet.

Get therapy. Try not to hurt anyone, or yourself.

Holy shit, I can't believe that that fag actually went out with a gold digger.
I hope for his sake that he'll break up with her before buying her anything expensive.

...

Hello Brooke, I am a LARPer here on Veeky Forums. Nice to meet you!

>a bit of peach fuzz on arms
>hairy
are you retarded and/or a faggot, user?

>I am a marketing analyst for Apple.
swipe left

Nothing more beta has ever been said to reveal so many insecurities in one sentence

...

...

Sorry Brooke, you are too old for me. 21 and younger. You can give me your number though and I might booty call you when I am desperate. Thanks.

>fail to recognize obvious copypasta
Welp, that's my sell signal. Newfag overload.

>reddit KEK mods deleted all top comments that roasted this golddigging whore
God I hate reddit

NOT
FUNNY
NO
SMEGMA
JOEK

You are from Australia aren't you.

I actually don't think that the woman was a disgusting person in this case like is usually the case with these posts. If I were a woman and my boyfriend showed absolutely no interest in solidifying a future for either of us I'd probably drop him and find someone else too.
It goes both ways, we guys want a woman who's attractive and loyal, but they need someone who can take care of them to complete that deal.

EA IS THE DEVILLL I'M SO OUTRAGED RIGHT NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

this has to be a troll by now

>I wish you lots of smiles and fun. So brave.

God I fucking hate reddit.

>telling an apple employee who you work for ever.
Lol no shady fucks using womens as warfare.

Can this please be a new Veeky Forums meme whenever some neet asks for sauce we just say it's Brooke from marketing?

thatz was nice to read. thanks

Yeah good point.

the whore is actually responsible for the guy being single again as she actively ruined his previous relationship

reddit.com/r/confession/comments/6ssfc4/i_just_found_out_i_ruined_my_exs_relationship/

Hi Brooke, I scan the internet for Google looking for dodgy shit you do. I have seen some shit.

This

She did literally nothing wrong

Her post was deleted

...

>but he had been dishonest about some things (not infidelity - 'life' things) and it led to us breaking up. I couldn't come to terms with his lying by omission - it seemed like he threw away our relationship over nothing.

Ok that's..an abnormal amount of arm hair..right?

Brooke is really self-conscious about her arm hair you jerk.

... I trade

>reddit.com/r/happy/comments/7alytj/having_coffee_with_the_one_who_got_away/

>comments locked

>horrible granny hands
>hairy arms
>shitty skin
>gross dirty ass granny feet
>uses makeup

Fuck off macfag I have to compile my Gentoo instead of losing time with ya thot

I fuck hot bitches
now open vagene

I actually agree with her

thanks for the new pasta

oh no I made 3 posts in a row
how embarrassing :(

h-hi Brooke...i shill altcoins on a Tibetan sword swallowing picture board haha.

>turn around and walk away
>can feel her looking at me
>start walking manually

Virgin man who thinks himself cunning by calling out angry virgin teen on his virginity yet uses terms like "beta" and "insecurities" tops angry virgin teen on the loser hierarchy

Nah. Spanish genes + blonde hair makes it look crazy thick in certain lights, but really most women have a fair amount of fuzz.

yeah, too bad we wont see why