Get my first lifting cage

>get my first lifting cage
>badass snake
>finish my first set
>bloodflow.jpg
>cage bulges forward
>everyone can see my cage through my compression pants
how do i avoid this?

Wear a cup

thats even more obvious tho

Sup bro? Checking out my snake?

hiss

>hiss

>Hey user it looks like you're getting pretty big now!
>Yea, just hitting up my last rep before I have to leave
>Oh cool, do you maybe want to grab a drink sometim- user what is that?
>U mirin my snake brah? They don't call it an anaconda for no reason brah.
>Uhhh.. actually I should probably go
>*Starts to power walk away
>*look down in pants*
>Shes mirin brah

ya brah wanna fuck later?

>purchases device for the purpose of hiding boners
>when boner occurs everyone can tell you are wearing said device (and have a boner)

Why are you asking us why your weird ass gadget is defective?

it keeps the blood in my muscles
but everyone knows i'm wearing it so embarrassing

You really don't understand? Next you're going to tell him not to use a squat plug.

Oh, misunderstanding, sorry.

I pretty much have a semi all the time, does this mean I have to cage my animal?

you can get a larger one to facilitate your semi
full mast boners are the real gains gobline
but a super tight cage can make you go full beastmode

How TF do you get your sack between the cage and the locking ring?

it's flexes a little

*flexes a kegel

"hisssss"

Redpill me on squat plugs please.

Will it give me hemorrhoids?
Will it turn me gay?

They keep your core stable during squatz and result in a smoother, more effective exercise. They also work your pelvic floor muscles which contribute to posture and such.

Googled and found very little information on this. Is it really worth doing? I don't currently own a buttplug.

You'll need to ask for squat plugs at your local sports store. The common butt plug won't help you maximize your gains.

It increases intraabdominal pressure idiot. Literally none of the things you said are true

Its not a fucking buttplug you faggot. If you wanted a buttplug dont disguise it as asking for a squat plug. Although its the same thing one iS FOR FAGGOTS and the other is for people who actually want to lift

I tried one but it was too difficult to clean around after I worked out. I might go back though, my ohp has been plateauing.
>buttplug
It's a squat plug.

Everyone can see my normal dick poking thru my shorts as it shrinks as most blood flow is diverted to my legs.

squat plugs are standard gear for weightlifting

oh for fuck's sakes

>Going to the gym with my squat plug and lifting cage ready to set a new PR
>On the way in I stop by the showers and get a shot of protein from the dispenser (Thanks David)
>plug in my headphones and start listening to K-pop to hype myself up
>As I reach forward to pick up the bar my squat plug slips out (guess I lubed it a bit too much)
>It falls out of my basketball shorts
>Stacey sees it and screams "what is THAT thing"
>Stutter and try to tell her it's a squat plug and it helps stabilize my core
>Chad pants me and calls me a 'loser faggot'
>Spaghetti falls out
>Shit everywhere
>They revoke my membership

Should I try planet fitness?