ITT: the most alpha things we’ve ever done

ITT: the most alpha things we’ve ever done

Brag about my stats on Veeky Forums

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Get my dick sucked in front of my LTR at a party. She just sat there and watched, I think she was into it. Still together.

Not the most alpha thing I've ever done but it made my pee pee tingle.

Yesterday my fiance, mother, and I were in Ikea getting some stuff for my fiance's and I apartment. We'd made it halfway through and got to the cafe area and i decided to get us some waters and a diet bepis for myself. I was in line behind this little Japanese soy family (the dudes wife was a 7/10 housewife, no tits but she'd be obedient if you stuck it in her pooper). The husband was 5'5 the wife was the same and they had a little boy no more than 2 or 3. Well we're getting to the cashier and the dude trips over a trash can. For whatever reason my body made me catch him. His tray flipped over and almost hit the kid. I hit it out of the kids way with his pathetic daddio in my left arm. The dad was shaken for whatever reason and then started thanking me in broken engrish. The mom was either turned on or embarrassed for her decision in a mate. She then thanked me as well, gave me a hug, and gave me this look that caused my glans to expand.

Like I said, not alpha but it was kinda nice having some pathetic soiboi make a fool of himself.

got blown by the wife of my highschool bully 10 years later. not my proudest moment but hey

>friend was bullied in junior high
>Bully one day goes full ape and beats friend up
>beat the shit out of bully after school that day
>dad visibly proud
>friend never bullied again
Some people need a good beating. That's just life.

Went to sleep and got sucked off my by my roommates girlfriend, I remember waking up mid blowjob and being so tired I just laid there.

>most Alpha thing and I’m asleep

>in tesco
>buying condoms
>drop them at the til
>cashier bends down and picks them up for me
felt alpha as fuark making that lil twink pick my condoms up for me

>girl flirting with me
>"Hey user, you're muscles are so big!"
>"Yeah, who cares"

Degenerate

>At a friend's hangout
>His gf gropes the fuck out of my arm
>She was hot but it's my friend's gf
>Afterwards tell my friend
>"Nah man, you're flattering yourself. You suck with girls, don't get a big head."
>Whatever cocksucker
>The next time she does it again, this time I make it a point to get my friend's attention
>He notices and looks at me funny but doesn't say/do anything
>That night she asks for my snapchat
>Whatever, give it to her
>I leave a couple hours later with my friends because my friend and her were obviously wanting to smash
>The next morning notice a notification on my phone
>It is from her
>"Hey user, I just wanted to let you know I think you're cute and if I had it my way I would've been with you last night."
>Show my friend
>He is devastated and breaks up with her
>He won't admit it but he is mad at me for some reason
>One night we get drunk and he just pushes it all out
>"Dude you ruined my relationship"
>How do you figure that
>"You fucking wore all those muscle tees and shit in front of her, you were just begging for attention"
>Fuck you man, I didn't do shit except expose her to you for what she is
>He is mad and avoids me for like a week
>Tell him I don't give a shit and have no regrets and if he seriously thinks I'm a bad friend he must've never run into one in his life
>He starts hitting on my oneitis in front of me one day casting smirks and shit towards me
>Sends me a pic of them studying together
>Go to his room that night and beat the shit out of him

Are you all 15 years old?

Who cares?

>fiancee's and I apartment
>I apartment
fiancee's and my apartment

I ate cereal. Without milk.

ABSO

LUTE

>Sends me a pic of them studying together
>Go to his room that night and beat the shit out of him
escalated quickly. Are you Russian by chance?

>late one evening
>me and bunch of boys down by the park
>practicing LARPing fighting with our foam weapons
>having a good time
>we’re winding down and getting ready to head off
>start walking off to mine (biggest apartment)
>start singing the Skyrim meme song
>suddenly out of nowhere here “Anooooooooooon” mid singing
>turn around and get face full of teen tits
>legs locked around my waist
>it’s a cute girl I met at a party a few months back
>see the stoner girl (the one who threw the party), the gymnast (hnnngg) and 2 guys rock up too.
>they’d heard me singing and teen girl (had a crush on me) had dragged them down
>we all laugh, invite them back to mine
>walk the whole way home with teen locked around my waist
>end up banging both her and gymnast girl that night in a threesome (they were already pretty into each other too)
>wake up next morning with them both in my arms and stoner girl cuddling gymnast girl
Good night.

>squat 5x365 on break in the middle of a work day
>flip out on dude who parked in my spot
>(I stopped and apologized, it was way inappropriate)
>take my apparently raging hormones to bar that night
>leave w khazar milktruck
It was a high T day

You are a bro and your 'friend' is a piece of shit, you've done well to be rid of him.

Got punched by a guy on the rugby pitch, started laughing and he ran away. Ref yellow carded him so I shouted over 'but it wasn't even a real punch ref' crowd loved it, ref loved it. Honestly it hurt so much I could barely fucking see but I kept my cool

>coked out at a strip club
>just left champagne room but forgot to pop the bottle
>drinking it at the bar and 10/10 stripper comes up (looked a lot like Arianna Marie desu..)
>make small talk over drinks with her

>friend gets kicked out for being way too drunk

>me: well that looks like my cue
>her: i'll be back on wednesday
>me: yeah... i'll probably never see you again. nice meeting you tho

Thank you autism.

A pajeet in middle school picked a fight with me and grabbed me by the neck and I just stared him down until he walked away.

>moved to a new town
>ff a couple months
>knew everyone in the local scene
>went to the bar with a gril
>walked in and shook at least 20 hands
>put a quarter on the pool table
>my game came up and I beat the first guy
>and the second
>and the third
>people started watching
>won the 4th
>and 5th, 6th, 7th....
>crowd of beaten people started forming around the table wondering when I'd lose
>won at least 19 games total in a row
>all the while the girl was all over me and everybody's girlfriends were blatantly staring at me
>went in the bathroom a couple times and did free coke
>two and a half hours on the table total before it was 1:30 and I finally just gave up nobody want to lose again
>bartender comped our tab
>walked back to my nice apartment right up the road
>fucked the gril in all holes until I passed out

you sound autistic

MADMAN

>Bully threw little pebbles at me to piss me off
>Throws motherfucking brick at him
>Almost lost his leg

I'm willing to bet you're all disgusting beasts but good on you just the same.

Be at bar with gf
See her ex
Be nice, but he starts making jokes that are increasingly inappropriate
Go to the bathroom
He follows
Starts to talk to me
Look him square in the eye and tell him that when we leave he will leave the bar without saying a word or I will beat his ass
He rushes out of bar
>feels good man

>3 brothers
>older one and one of the younger ones small, fat, aspie as fuck
>they get bullied by this one faggot
>bullying gets worse to the point of this little shit hitting my bros
>finally I catch him in the act
>pull him off my brother and throw him down a flight of stairs.
>little fuck survived, but never fucked with anyone I knew again.

Got quite a few stories looking after my brothers because god damn were they autistic.

Maybe you should of helped your friend get some gains instead of being a dick and messing with his girlfriend by man slutting around his house.

No, you did good user. That stripper was out to milk your wallet dry.

I went full autism on that part lol. Thank you.

> In Portugal on vacation
> Drug dealer on the street homes in on me
> Tries to sell me everything from weed to heroin
> Grabs my arm
> Oh shit you dumb Spaniard what do you think you're doing
> Grab his neck and push him towards a wall
> It was a good 6 foot push towards a wall, really honed in the fact I could body him and he couldn't do anything about it
> "Habla Ingles? Never touch me again or I will fucking maul you"
> Let go, stare him down a little, he runs away
> Everyone watching clapped

>4 boys
Your parents did good user, meanwhile I got cucked with a sister

told my grandma she's retarded

>practicing LARPing
Not hard enough, apparently. This lie is poorly written.

Textbook alpha
Feel pain
Blow it off
He still gets punished
Increase social standing

All boxes checked, good job user

I sat in the lap of a girl I never spoke to right on front of her boyfriend. I then proceded to set up a date with her.

Honestly I was pretty hammered but my guy friends just thought I had balls of steel

I have done loads of alpha stuff but its not cool or interesting. Its mostly just fighting and cucking other dudes and having sex with a bunch of cute girls.

True alpha shit is way cooler and no one on Veeky Forums is truly alpha like some spec ops killing machine dude

>at a party
>guy being 1,90m or so tries to drink beer straight from bottle
>gently tell him to grab a glass but give him that wide eye look aka 'or else...'
>guy looks at me...."...K".....and goes to get a glass
>gf right next to me totally wet

I left the room breathing heavily for that punch that never came.

I'm 1,68m.

>I think she was into it
If she wasn't involved and didn't try, she wasn't into it. She's cheating on you and thats why she didnt leave you fag.

If this is true, good on you user. Handled the best way possible.

>being friends with a passive aggressive faggot

>Be me
>Shy nerd, but fairly good looking, and social once I'm comfortable
>First semester of university
>Decide to go to a party, but not drink anything there
>A little while in and I'm pretty bored, start wandering around the house
>Enter the hallway
>See some drunk, nearly passed out chick getting her chest groped by some fuckboy DYEL beta
>Time slows, I literally stare at them thinking "wtf is going on"
>Something in me clicks
>The chick is begging him to stop in slurred language
>Guy keeps persisting and holds her against the wall grabbing her everywhere
>Finally, I muster the courage to step in
>Stand up straight, march over, and place my hand on the dudes shoulder to pull him away.
>This dude is a complete manlet, and I'm 6'4 but skinny
>Doesn't matter, his pupils dilate as he looks up at me
>Lets go of her and skitters off into the main room of the party
>Girl gathers herself up, thanks me, then leaves
>Mfw I actually felt like I did something alpha


>A week later I see them together in the library
>Mfw

One time i got my weewee sucked at the school bathroom, she wanted to fuck but my friend was asking where i was so i just went to class.
Now I'm a virgin and no one wants to fuck me while my friend getting mad puss

>>Go to his room that night and beat the shit out of him
Jesus

I stole someone's reservation at a restaurant because the line was too long.

Am I in the wrong? I felt like I am justified in every way.

Abe Froman?

Getting raped isn't alpha

I once fought two armed robbers.

this
She justified her own cheating with this.

A girl dominated you by raping you in your sleep and you just watched and let it happen.
You're not alpha, you're a super beta.

?

No there was some muslim wedding being hosted at this buffet restaurant and my reservation would have made me wait 2 hours in line. We were about to leave when the hostess said my name and "Party of 4" (there were 3 of us). I ran up to her and took it before the other group could claim it.

Not necessarily, trashy women are starting to accept being one of multiple girlfriends. I've gotten multiple tinder matches of hoes talking about their bfs and how they're okay with it.

...

>First time buying condoms at Target
>Magnums because big benis :DDD
>Get some delicious cinnamon toast crunch to put on top of the condom box, nervous as fuck because never done this before
>Trying to use the self-checkout
>Not working
>Automated voice: "We're sending an employee your way"
>SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT
>Soiboi twink employee comes over
>Grabs CTC box and scans it
>Sees condom box
>Looks visibly nervous
>"O-oh..." *Looks away from me*
>Look at him with a smug, shit-eating grin on my face
>Thanks for helping me check out, man
>"Y-you too"
>For the first time in my life checking out at a grocery store, I was not the autismo

>Fucked my ex gf while her bf was at work
>Punched a guy who started on me and he backed off
>fucked every girl in my friend group
Idk

>be me at a bar
>approach a lone girl
>make small talk until
>guy comes up and she introduces him as her bf
>literal dyel twink
>say "well how about we get out of here and ditch this loser"
>he laughs awkwardly and insists they leave
>feel alpha as fuck

Grammar gains bro

That’s not alpha that’s being a bully

Stop with this copy&pasta

I N T I M I D A T I N G

>have shit corporate job
>boss is a spineless fatty
>I want to do stuff for the department, but he's always shooting me down
>Decide fuck it, time to quit, no career growth here
>Think of best time to do it
>C-suite in town for all hands meeting
>Book a meeting with VP "on behalf" of fatty
>Meet with VP and lay out all the things that I want to do for the department, give some numbers from my research
>VP is clearly impressed
>Two weeks later promoted to fatty's same level and given half the team
>Fatty's half of the team all on my side as well because they know I give a fuck about the dept
>A few months pass, our numbers are up 43%
>Fatty tries to take credit but VP knows better
>Ha ha, reorg time!
>Get promoted again, this time director
>Am now Fatty's boss, promote one of my people to his spot
>Our numbers now top in company

Don't fuck with my team

I gotta make them grammar gainz.
>Going to make it?

Umm bruh, if they're matching with you on tinder and have a boyfriend.. they're cheating... how did you miss this?

I dated a dude once because he bought me drugs and I was a dope addict

I didn’t even slob on his knob I just lead him on for awhile

How alpha is that guys I infiltrated the gays

Nah I was skinny fat with about 8months noobgains when I first found Veeky Forums. Enough to impress normies. Out of us 5 guys only one of us was disgustingly fat, other one chubby and two sticks.
Girls were smoking though, Probably the hottest girls I’ve ever gotten with. All of them that teeniebopper scene look.
Believe what you will, still my fondest memory. That and cucking a bunch of tubby fags who were all over my ex in front of them by fireman carrying her drunk ass around her apartment while I cleaned up and shoo’d them out after a party. All the while her slurring “take me to beeeeeed user.”

They're not cheating, there's regular girls that are engaging in polygamy and polyamory now.

what happened next?

haha hell yeah dude. Thats alpha as FUCK

>Drug addict
>Gay
Let me guess, you have HIV

I used to date a poly girl before she threw me to the curb.

There was no schadenfreude when she told me the guy she was seeing was dumping her for his real girlfriend.

I did feel bad when she told me she was raped though.

>why the fuck do i still miss her even after she's gotten fat?

A girl somewhat liked me in high school so at a party me and her are outside and i'm slightly drunk so i go in for a kiss, she dodges her entire head away and says "you're really drunk aren't you" i think to myself "well fuck you then", go and find a 8/10, 3 minutes later we're making out in the kitchen and when the lights come on because some other girl puked her guts out the previous girl is standing 2 meters away staring at me with my hand under the shirt of the blonde

Seems so, buddeh...

Turned down an attractive girl who wanted to sleep with me. Literally nothing in my life has given me a bigger rush. We ended up dating later and the sex was good, but not as good as turning her down. I did the same thing with another girl a few years later and it was just as sweet that time, though I did not end up bedding her at a later date. Absolutely nothing is more empowering.

You're a filthy degenerate. Getting a bj from a trashy girl while your trashy "gf" watches you is NOT alpha. Homeless men are having drug orgies downtown, do you consider them men to aspire to?

nope you did good. that passive aggressive bullshit is for girls. honestly, that guy was tangled up in pussy to have a clear mind.

A friend had spent about 4 months chasing a girl. I started talking to her, and a month after she asked me to be her boyfriend.
She was ugly as sin, so I had to refuse.

>at gym warming up on bench, hulking around and yelling as usual
>picking up bench and shaking it really loud after each set going YEEEESSSSSSSSSS
>fucking dyel fags up to me and fags to me “hey man I’ve been waiting an hour and a half for you to get off the only flat bench, mind if I work into your last set?”
>say “OH SURE OF COURSE OLE BUDDY OLE PAL” and grin at him
>he starts unloading my weight off for his set
>”uh no, if you’re going to work in with me you have to do my weight”
>”but sir,” he fags, “my 1rm is only 135”
>tell him to suck it up or I’ll bend all the barbells in half in the entire gym
>he finally gets under the 4pl8 warmup I had
>help him get the bar over him
>he’s lock out and struggling to even hold it over himself
>put all my weight on the top the bar and yell “SURPRISE FAGGOT”
>the bar immediately severes his spine
>he’s in a wheelchair that he drives with his mouth now

fucking dyels get the FUCK out of my way at the gym

I married a beautiful woman and had my own kids

I'm sure this has actually happened before due to some retard's roid rage

based

ALPHA

You shouldve gone rid of him when he started to blame you. The asskicking was pretty alpha and he deserved it

>Be in friend group in high school
>Mostly vidya/anime betas
>I was just starting to get into lifting at this time, noobgains gave me an inflated ego
>5 other guys in friend group want to date this girl who was also in the group
>Qt gamer girl
>Hit on her, working my entry-level Chad magic
>Start dating her
>The other guys are all jealous AS FUCK
>She turns out to be a psychotic bitch
>Literal /r9k/-tier pretty princess bullshit
>Dump her
>She's completely heartbroken
>Crying all over social media
>Have absolutely no feelings for her when I dumped her, feel like a free man
>More time to focus on fitness
>Lifts are all going up at a crazy rate, feel fucking amazing
>Join the wrestling team, find new friend group of Chads
>She rebounds with this dyel skinny twink faggot a few months later
>She still constantly tries to talk to me over text and social media
>Leave her on read
>Lel
It's been a rough last few years for me since I've been in uni, but at least I can look back on the time where I became Chad.

>dad visibly proud
Better than mom mires desu

I had a threesome with two strippers named Bentley and Barbie

I drunkenly told this broad to shut up while men were talking about sports in front of everyone at a party once and instead of being chastised for sexism or whatever, everyone laughed and a good time was had by all.

forgave my gf for cheating on me. it takes a real man to forgive even when its hard.

>be me in high school, sophomore year
>go to concert with group of friends and friends of friends
>one senior guy brings a senior girl
>she’s a fucking milkntrucm with a huge ass
>milkies aren’t my type but she’s really pretty too so even I think she’s really attractive
>the whole concert she ends up getting closer and closer to me
>half way through the openers she’s pretty much grinding on me in front of everyone else
>her ass is so fucking big compared to her waist
>pop a boner I know she can feel
>she’s always turning around and smiling at me
>later we all grab Waffle House and she sits next to me
>feeling my dick under the table the entire time
>afterwards never talk to her again

>Told some Slav shit on the District line not to litter with his empty booze bottle and stared him down until he gave it to his gf to put in his bag
>They got off the next stop
Considering he looked like a brick shithouse and i'm still

Not really alpha just following the cuck route
>high school
>friends gf is walking with our friend group even though her boyfriend isnt there
>I'm looking all dapper
>don't even know her that well at the time
>she playfully grabs my arm like I am escorting her to the play
>feel really awkward
>she sits next to me
>really close
>her boyfriend joins us
>joking around with them during the play
>he puts her hand on my thigh
>Autistically stare at both of them
>pulls her hands away

Very weird. I think he is a homosexual that wanted to watch me fuck her. He confided in me that he watched cuckold porn with creampie cleanup

>be in strip club
>wayyy too drunk
>forget the no touching rule
>smack stripper's ass HARD
>she turns around and winks at me

>alpha
just sat there and did nothing

>forget the no touching rule
>implying that isn't the ultimate beta-blocker
Everyone touches and plenty more

>>Be me
>>Shy nerd, but fairly good looking, and social once I'm comfortable
>>First semester of university
>>Decide to go to a party, but not drink anything there
>>A little while in and I'm pretty bored, start wandering around the house
>>Enter the hallway
>>See some drunk, nearly passed out chick getting her chest groped by some fuckboy DYEL beta
>>Time slows, I literally stare at them thinking "wtf is going on"
>>Something in me clicks
>>The chick is begging him to stop in slurred language
>>Guy keeps persisting and holds her against the wall grabbing her everywhere
>>Finally, I muster the courage to step in
>>Stand up straight, march over, and place my hand on the dudes shoulder to pull him away.
>>This dude is a complete manlet, and I'm 6'4 but skinny
>>Doesn't matter, his pupils dilate as he looks up at me
>>Lets go of her and skitters off into the main room of the party
>>Girl gathers herself up, thanks me, then leaves
>>Mfw I actually felt like I did something alpha
>>A week later I see them together in the library
>>Mfw
You're a good dude user

...where about downtown? asking for a friend