Advice to someone going to the gym for the very first time ever tomorrow? I read the sticky

Advice to someone going to the gym for the very first time ever tomorrow? I read the sticky.

Always tip the receptionist, probably extra tomorrow because it's your first time

Don't be afraid of looking like a pussy. It's better to struggle with 95lbs than get pinned under 135.

Treadmill for 5min then look at your phone and pretend to have some important meating while walking to the exit, eyes fixed on your phone

Thanks i dont mind looking like a puss.
Kek

Unironically this.
Tipping big right off the bat (10-20 dollars) will payback 10 times in the long run

How's it feel to be a poorfag

Re rack your weights

Squat your bodyweight

Yeah, here's my advice.

If you see someone laughing and looking near your direction, they're laughing at you.
Everyone's paying attention to your lifts, because you're new. Girls are staring, it's out of disgust and not admiration. If you lock eyes with a girl, I guarantee you they were trying to sneak a look because of how fucking awkward you look, and now think you're a creep.

Everyone can see that you're doing the least weight in the room. Everyone is judging your shit form. Are you SURE you remember how to do that exercise correctly? Oh, and by the way, if you get the feeling you're standing out, you are, just so you know. And the worst part is, people can tell that you can tell that you stand out.
Everyone is thinking "look how fucking weak that guy" to themselves, I guarantee you.
Have fun, man!

I've never been to this gym and I can tell this is bait. Everyone is too busy fagging out over themselves at the gym to notice you.

>Coming to Veeky Forums just to psychologically attack strangers that want to improve themselves
You should feel bad

I can't believe you actually took time out of your day just to write all that shit, lol.

Uh OP, it's ok to be nervous, it will pass as soon as you get home tomorrow and realize that for a first time, it wasn't that bad.

dyel bro

Yeah I just see these kinds of threads a lot and decided to write that garbage down instead of the usual stuff because I thought it was funny

Take pride in every step there yet stay humble. You are making one of the best decisions of your life, something through which you will teach yourself discipline, a new mindset, and will along the road give you meaning. It will be the anchor to ground you in the storm of life.

However, you have a long way to go. You will feel weak, you will feel timid. That's good, you'll look back and know you are stronger and more satisfied for the awkward effort. Remember, you and your lifts are the only thing that matters in the gym. Some guys might be lifting to boost their mirror muscles, some women might be lifting to maintain their booty.

But you are lifting to improve your soul, piece by piece. Remember that in the hard times, don't feel superior to anyone, and stay present as if meditating. Before long this will become your new addiction.

Flex a cep to the qts

Since there is so much dubious content in this thread, here's my advice for you.
So you're going to the gym tomorrow and have read the sticky? Cool.
Have you decided why you're going? What your goal is? How you're going to measure it?
If you're going just to get used to the equipment and see how things go that's fine, but bare in mind what you want to achieve in 2, 4, 6 months time.
If you just go with no idea in mind as to what your gonna do and why, not only will it kill any motivation, but you'll probably end up doing weird shit and end up on youtube's gym fails.

Great youtube channels for how to do things are Athlean-x and Scooby1961, as well as ScottHermanfitness.

I personally recommend full body workout, unless you already have something in mind as to what you want to go for.
In my experiences of gyms, everyone there who's there for a workout, will just get on with it, not bothering anyone.
Sure there will be a few teenagers and dyels there to take selfies, as well as some distracting qt's doing yoga or some shit.

So no need to worry about what others may be thinking, any decent people there will pay you no heed.
All the best with it mate

This exactly, have a vision.
I started because I wanted to get a hotter body for girls, it was a small tennage goal but it motivated me. Now I just lift because I want to become stronger and see the potential of what my body can do and what it can become.

Stop reading Camus.

god I laughed my dude

Idk about this...
Sounds fair
Exactly how i imagined it
Honestly thank you. Also checked.
Good looking out on the yt channels. I am going just to try out some equipment and do some very basic strength training and maybe swimming because I love to.

Last question: what is a dyel?

Here are legit advises;
>people WILL look at you briefly for the 1st week or so, but it's basically people that have never seen you before in their life, like girls will quickly glance to see if you're fuckable. Just like a dog sniffing another dog's ass

>if you want really good sessions, drink a small shake consisting of some oats and frozen fruit, water, as well as some preworkout supplement

>there is absolutely nothing wrong with cardio, especially if your main goal is to lose weight and get in shape. Unless you dedicate a day or 2 of cardio, you should always do 15-30mins of decent (aka you need to sweat) cardio everytime you hit the gym. Whether you do it before or after lifting is up to you. Personally I do it before because I only stop lifting once I'm tired. The Stairmaster is low impact and my favorite

>music imo is very important. Unless you're gonna use some kind of streaming music, I'd recommend you download long mixes of your favorite music and keep updating your music every week so you will want to get your ass to the gym and listen to some hot new shit

>do 4 reps of each set in the following way:
-a medium set of 7-12 reps
-a heavy set of 3-6 reps
-another medium set 7-12 reps
-a lightweight rep of 12+ until failure
The only exception here is compound movements like squat or deadlift, you should stay in the 3-9ish range.

>machines are fine. Ideally you should do a bit of everything (dumbell, barbell, machines, cable machines)

Could go on for days here but those are the ones that come to mind at 1st

I am doing it because I believe neglecting my physical strength has been bad for my character
Well I have read his major works so I probably will. What should I read in stead?

You'll want to tip in bigger bills so they know you came prepared to tip your first time. Also just a reminder that tipping the hot receptionist does not entitle you to her time or her conversation, not even months down the line when you're shredded.

Do you eat lettuce

Quality post making a screen cap of a lot of these

Cool

>do 4 reps of each set in the following way:
Meant to say do 4 sets of each exercise.
You can do a 5th set if you feel like you got more left in you

do you even lift

people who might claim to work out, but have nothing to show it

Grunt as loud as you can to assert dominance. It also helps with your lifts, don't be shy

Well since you're new, I'm going to tell you right off the bat. The top gym bear is most likely going to be there, and yes, if you tickle his fancy he will personally claim you as his twink property.

DO NOT, walk past him. If you do this he will take it as a threatening act from a new rival, dislocate your shoulders, and throw you into the manlet pit. Instead, simply go up, bow your head, and introduce yourself. At that point, he will make a low grunting noise and nod his head, that's when you bend over and present your ass to him. He may get a good whiff in, may not, but depending on how cute you are, he will either keep you as his personal twink boy and protect you from the twiglegs and cookie cutters (You'll have to have his name tattoo'd onto your ass and use his bar), or he'll leave you to your own.

Also, you can get std's from the water fountain.

Fuck off satan