Tfw hemorrhroids

For the last few months I have been eating extremely clean. Lean meats (mostly salmon and chicken) brown rice and plenty of greens with no added salt or any other sauces. So I have no idea why this would happen.

dehydration...

ive noticed that if i dont drink enough liquids i will almost certainly have problems 1 or 2 days after

You could try eating more fiber, like psyllium, and change some habits, do you work siting down all the time or do you spend most of your time sat down? If so, each hour try to stand a few minutes, go drink some water or chat with someone. Hemorrhoids are a literal pain in the ass, and apart of some oinment, you need to rest. If the lump is soft, probably it's going to heal with time, no problem, but if it's hard, you should go to a doctor.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=dcS3363jci8

Watch this, then try some variation of snake diet no food for at least 48 hours ad drinking snake juice which is just salt and potassium water for your electrolytes. I used to have really painful gas and IBS and wasn't sure what food was causing it but snake diet was instant relief while I figured my diet out.

Diet changes are fine, but changing your pooping habits is better. Only try to shit when you know something will come out, get closer to a squat position, and don't try to push so much that your asshole comes out with it.

Good diet with lots of water and fibre will mean that good habits come naturally, but if you want to eat garbage and shit habaneros, then you can still prevent them.

I think both hydration and more fiber are key, as other anons said

At least you don't have a pilonidal cyst bro. I got one 15 years ago, and it's been a constant problem since.

Also use salt. Salt is important for your body. Lack of salt can also cause dehydration

Dont be afraid of salt

There is plenty of salt needed for daily consumption in most foods without needing to add more.

>had the worst hemorrhoid ever
>considering suicide (not really but it was bad)
>be vegan
>never come back

just eat more fiber if you're retarded and buy the soyboy meme

A guy who had hemmies here. Only internal ones, luckily, but the treatment, I imagine, is the same (got it from bad breathing during lifts).
Nowadays I get hemmies only when I push too much on the toilet because I am autistic about shitting outside the house, so like for two weeks a year and that is only due to my idiocy (and having read that people fight with them year after year and never get them away, I think I got either lucky or found the solution).

1) You WANT to do pull-ups, that shit is magic, as well as squat with tight ass and deadlift with the most perfect form you've ever seen because that helps.
2)Toilet situation: first of all: KNEES UP. Buy squatty potty if yu can, otherwise improvise (I tiptoe while sitting) and instead of pushing your rectum out, do this: tighten your abs, push through your stomach, your ass should NOT go out, instead you should feel your asshole tighten and sort of go in.
Wiping wise, if possible, during the first days before the hemmies go away (day or two if you do things right are the only problematic ones), shower instead of wiping.
When washing your ass, GO IN. I repeat, GO. IN. with your finger. Not to mention that you clean your ass properly, butt massage of the area is helpful prevention against and during hemmorhoids.
3)Drink a lot of water, eat enough fiber.
4)Before you go to bed, apply some ointment on your ass (I use some skin care cannabis ointment). I don't know if it's actually the ointment helping, possibly yes, but the fact that your ass is not dry and thus is not irritating the hemmies even more is defnitely helpful.
As you said, legs up, so blood flows into your butt, very helpful. When sitting DO NOT sit on your ass like you would normally, but instead tighten your glutes and bring them together and sit on them, so that there is no pressure applied against your rectum (major problem and further worsens the situation).

Squatting heavy and prolonged sitting can both contribute to hemorrhoids.

get it cleaned out properly by a surgeon and stop being a filthy lardass

Oatmeal, 150grams for breakfast. Thank me later.

>No meat
>Walk/jog
>lots of veggies
>Maybe even look into a juice diet for a few days
>don't wipe, instead use warm water on your toilet paper and softly pat your ass until clean enough

There ya go. If it's not better in a week, go to a doctor. You're probably gonna need surgery if it takes that long.

I had one when I was 16 and thought it was an ass pimple which I tried to pop. Thankfully it healed in a few days.

lmao

Just chew on some painkillers, and see the doctor

For you

Go to the chinatown and find a herb tea store and get a fix, tell that owner you have internal heat or "yee chi"

plant based diet, lots of water and take a hour walk a day.

THen you can go back to your lifting/bro diet and clog your arteries.

I had 2 external roids cut out by an ass surgeon. Recovery time was about 3 weeks of blinding pain. The worst part is that you can't take opiods for pain management because they constipate you and you don't want to he squeezing rock hard shits out over ass wounds.

Take a cold bath and put you ass into the cold stream so it helps on reduce inflammation, do some light massage around your anus (this may sound like a meme but it helps reduce inflammation, maybe the bottom part of a toothbrush or something dildo shapped). Don't eat spicy food or lots of meat for the next days, instead consume more fiber and drink lots of water. Go to your local drugstore and buy hemorrhoid cream and go to your house and rest.

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I can't even fart without immense pain. Just kill me bros.

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correct posture will help with your roids

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Lance and drain

Go to the fucking doctor, you doofus.

>drain a blood vessel
No, you retard.

>Lance vein on an us
>bleed out and die or die of infection
Well I guess op won't have a problem anymore

Nothing you can do about it, but apply coconut oil for relief and prevention.

Edamame beans and tofu worked wonders for me when I was suffering.

after you go dookie, go into shower and clean your sewage hole with loofah/poof and liquid soap, gently.
Wiping is very rough, even with the softest toilet paper, and doesn't clean 100%, like warm water and soap will.

Fast let the wound heal then dont make ur shit too big

If they are super painful (like unbearable) they may be thrombosed.

I ended up getting a thrombosed one and almost ended up dying from a blood clot. Get that shit checked out ASAP.