How does Chad eliminate his pubes and ass/taint hairs?

t. disgusting hippie at every music fetival you can smell from 15 feet away

What? Absolutely wasted trips, go back to Reggit
I made it and ctrl+v from every thread I post it on, so yes, sort of
But that doesn't make it less relevant
>t. has never heard of a bidet, also overdresses with cheap, unbreathable synthetic fibers causing him to sweat
>also has a shitty diet that makes him smell bad whenever he sweats so he has to shave bare like a prepubescent 10-year-old in order to avoid the shame
Hell I'd be pissed too if I was dealing with razor bumps, stubble, ingrown hair, and giving away my shekels for hair removal treatments

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Hippie fag

>calls others a hippie
>doesn't realize he looks like a 10 year old with his pedophile friendly shave
>probably does it only because his cock would look small if covered by hair
kek, keep shaving you guys, no skin off my back
And there's nothing inherently dirty or smelly about hair anywhere on the body if you know how to bathe

you’re gross and should go back to /mu/ or whatever board they let gross hippies like you stink up the place

nighty night faggot!

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sauce please

>anyone with hair is gross
Girls love the way I smell. As I said, hair is vital for pheromone production. What do you think the "nice smelling dude with the hairy chest" meme comes from? Our bodies have hair for a reason, and the reasons are innumerable. I couldn't imagine getting rid of my hair because "society says".
Dunno, from hairy thread, there's plenty more like it

Didn't Hitler kill himself while commies raped all his aryan women?

Imagine shaving your asshole. What are you a fucking fag? Are you expecting to bummed, you little homo? There is zero reason for a straight male to shave his asshole, you have fallen for a gay meme and only a cocksucker would consider wanting to make his asshole smooth and remove the natural barrier of protection for males to not be mounted by other males.

Dangle berries are awful mind you

>tfw tweezing dick hairs

don't know why I bother, no one will ever see it and it comes back in 2 weeks

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Wild and free for man
Any of the first 3 for girl
Or GTFO

Get a bidet you nasty-assed idiot. 30$ for one that installs onto any regular toilet.
b
i
d
e
t
See this girl? Imagine how damn clean she is down under due to the bidet. Mmmm.

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but having a hairy ass means i have to wipe 10 million times after taking a shit though

>the natural barrier of protection for males to not be mounted by other males

You don't even know what you're saying, you waste of space.

yeah shitting in your ass hair is nasty. I shave it and my body count is also at 29 (females)

Get a bidet.
>shit
>wash with bidet
>pat dry with single cloth
Fucking done. No more wiping a million times, no more baby wipes, no more swamp ass, no more feeling unclean or that you missed some shit. Plus, you don't even have to shave your ass like a trap.

But user, it is litterally a bush down here

I'm more of a wild and free type a guy i just dont get tired

>b
>i
>d
>e
>t
Are there really people who are shaving their ass because they don't want shit caught in it? Have you guys not heard of a bidet? What in the actual fuck.

but I dont know if im comfortable with anything squirting up my asshole though

Fucking double trips can't go unwitnessed

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wild and freee is the best. prove wrong niggers

I do both, it feels cleaner.

OP I use an epilator

I have hairs growing about 2 inches up the shaft of my dick, and a few tufts growing just below the head of the dick.

Is it my anglo genes?

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Nice shilling. 0 cents to your bank account

I do not want to shave for hygienic reasons but more for asthetic ones.

Bidets don't squirt up your asshole. They don't work like you're imagining they do.
Even if they did, would you rather have some water up your butt, or walk around with a nasty ass all day?
>double trips
Go back to Reggit please
Woke. Hair is the universal symbol of freedom and manliness, and yes that includes pubic hair.
If you're worried about girls not liking it, you have to learn to own it. For example my name is Robert and I have a nice crimson bush, and if they make negative comments I joke "They don't call me Robert the Red for nothing!" and they laugh and love it every time.
TL;DR gotta own it.
>growing up 2 inches
normal
>tufts below head
the fuck breh? Never heard nor seen of this. You should definitely see it that's normal.

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Perhaps just get wet wipes? Or maybe clean thoroughly in your daily bath/shower wash? That is literally the solution.

Sorry I don't want another male to penetrate me, you little faggot. Humans have had anus hair since time immemorial as a natural, protective barrier for other males not to mount other males and thus promote the seeding of females.

So is mine and I have never had the thought to shear it off, I enjoy the warmth, masculinity and general feeling of security anus hair gives.

Kek, call me a shill all you want, I'm happy knowing I'm one of the few people in this country of 300 million without their last shit smeared over their ass because "bidets are faggy and gross!"

>thinking this makes him special
The madman

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>don't shave hair like a fag/paedo
>just squirt liquid up your ass every time you shit
You are the one that seems the fag, especially shitting up the thread replying to literally everyone here.

>humble bidet salesman

You are crazy, queer, there is many people in this thread who think shaving asshole hair is supremely gay, not just one.

I trim. Just put a 2 guard on and usually shave my balls because once you cut your ballsack with clippers you'll never do it again.

Who here /trimmedbutshavedballsack/?

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>that grammar
Go back to your loo, Pajeet

>walks around with a dirty ass
You truly haven't used a bidet. I know you haven't because you make shitty comments like this. It really is life changing to walk around with a clean ass. I'm not even meming, it feels fucking great. To imagine 20 years of my life I went without this simple piece of technology that is water that even Brazilians have figured out.
>STILL thinks bidets shoot water up his ass
It doesn't work like that idiot, you too haven't used a bidet I see. It doesn't work like you're imagining.
Would you rather someone may think you're gay for having water wash your ass or have a clean ass? What the fuck? AFRICANS have this shit figured out when they wash in the river after taking a shit.
You don't even have to buy anything, kek. You can even use a water bottle with a hole poked in it to wash, or your shower head if you shit at home.
The only constant being that you must use water to wash yourself when you're done shitting, that's it. IDGAF what you do afterwards.
Thank you, for fucks sake, they don't get it.

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>hair can be considered your antennae
The public school system has failed you

What about if you need to use a public restroom? There are no bidets at most.

Bidets come with settings its not a firehose up your ass its the same as taking a shower. If you had shit on any other part of you body would you just wipe it off with toilet paper or would you use water? Do you clean your dishes with just rags?

Why do dogs wag their tails as if "scanning" the environment? Notice the tiny hairs in their ears. They are used to catch vibrations, who's to say humans don't see similar (though of less effect) uses?
Why did nobility in the past grow their hair long?
Why do slaves historically have their hair cut? Why is a women's long hair so attractive?

Why REALLY do humans have body hair to begin with? Would the human body waste resources growing this if it was useless?
Come on brah. This is easy mode.
I absolutely don't use public restrooms if I have to, I haven't used a toilet without a bidet in years, mostly because I work from home.
You can make/buy a "portable bidet" with a water bottle and a hole poked in it to wash the area if you're desperate.
You can also use just a shower in desperation, obviously avoiding getting the rest of your body wet, to reduce drying time.

>my body count is also at 2

>body count
>keeping track of how many girl you have sex with

virgin

If you don't have a bidet handy, either spit on the toilet paper or flush the toilet then dunk it in the new toilet water. This is wasteful however

To wipe without using water is to walk around with shit particles in your ass all day

spit on toilet paper is GOAT.

Just normal water causes the paper to ball up, then you have shit-covered wet pieces of TP stuck to your ass hairs all day. Why do you think animals all lick their own assholes? Saliva is best way to clean

I tweeze them, too. Aside from the rare ingrown hair, it's not that bad.

I'm glad I'm not this dumb

>spit on tp
never do this, gross
>dunk it in water
Possible, but you're still making your previously dry shit now wet and smearing it everywhere
Plus most TP meant for wiping will disintegrate in water, leaving little fibers everywhere, so not a good idea
troll trying to discredit washing with water
eww

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>le funny retard maymay xD
>would rather walk around with his last shit smeared all over his ass and be shaved bare to pedophile-friendly levels than have something on an anime board think he's dumb
your prerogative mate, enjoy the swamp ass and hemorrhoids which will come later on

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I agreed with the dude. Keep it grown. I just trim the pubes on my shaft so my girl doesn't stuff her face in my pubes when she gives me a bj.

I'm the same way, hair goes about 2in up my shaft and then I have a few stray hairs below the shaft that I tweeze

Definitely wash around your ass in the shower. You do not want a pilonidal sinus, trust me. Shaving the ass, however, is unhygienic since any poop remnants are free to travel rather than being retained at the butthole. You end up more prone to ass zits and such.
What's with the bidets, isn't that less convenient than just wiping?

There are two parts to your post. I was referring to the first part. I also prefer bidets.

No, bidets are the best. Allow me to explain:

Without bidet:
>shit
>wipe with dry, rough paper
>repeat until no more streaks
>use baby wipe (chap your asshole from chemicals) and wipe your own shit all over the place
>continue baby wipe until no more streak
>stand up with shit all over your ass and think you're clean

With bidet:
>shit
>wash with bidet
>pat dry with single cloth
Done. No more worrying about being unclean, or missing anything, etc.

how are you supposed to wipe your ass with wet toilet paper if you are using a public restroom with a stall and open row of sinks? what, wet your finger rub it on some TP then walk back into the stall?

luckily at my work they are single bathrooms so i can stand up, walk a few inches to the sink, get my finger wet and pat it on the tp so it isnt too wet then wipe

But dude how well does a bidet actually wash the ass? My buddy has one and I tried it, on normal settings it was like an arching trickle that like just acted to spread bacteria. On turbo mode it was aiming right into my butthole and penetrated that shit a bit. Not cool

This gave me a much needed laugh after a rough week. Thanks user.

Dip in toilet.

Chad invites some nerdy, shy girl over to his place, they both know she has no chance. Chad nods when she appears at the door, and they walk wordlessly up to his room. Chad takes a package of wax strips from his closet, removes his pants and lays down on the bed, knees up. Nerdy girl gets to work, waxing most of the hair and tweezing out stragglers. She then applies soothing lotion to the area, puts his shorts back on and leaves. In 2 weeks time, Chad summons another shy reserved cutie to perform her duties, as is the cycle of life.

Bidet talk, okay. I often have this conversation with my friends because I have one and they rag on me for it.

>it's gay to spray water up your ass
Can't possibly be gayer than putting a thin piece of paper on your hand and sticking your fingers up there.
>it spreads bacteria
Wiping with sterilizing toilet paper, are we?
>it goes into your butt hole
Have you ever tried putting something in your ass like a suppository? Your ass is made for things to go in one direction. It does NOT like things going IN, and water is no exception. I've never had water inside my colon after using a bidet. If your ass is so loose you're getting water up there I mean... what the fuck bruh?

Bidets aren't magic. If you have a particularly sticky shit you'll have to spray, wipe, then spray again. You'll have to use toilet paper one way or the other because your ass will be soaking wet from the water.
>On turbo mode it was aiming right into my butthole and penetrated that shit a bit.
What the fuck angle do you shit at? Just position your body so your ass is at an angle and the water just deflects.

Honestly the biggest drawback to using a bidet is the water is cold as fuck. But hey, get some wicked diarrhea for a day and you'll be thanking your lucky stars you have nice cool water to blast your ass instead of rough paper scraping away what's left of the skin on your hemorrhoids.

>tweezing dick hairs, but no one will ever see it
kek

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use baby wipes/ moist towelettes to clean the shit morons

Fuck I'm moving to a new office tomorrow, and if they don't have a single bathroom I might get dangerously close to quitting

Nair every day.

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Wax, all day everyday.

Takes literally a month to grow back, and it's only painful the first and second time. Your hair literally starts growing back thinner, and with smaller bulbs.

I go on the 16th of every month, its cheaper than razors and cream/nair whatever if you buy the year long packages wax places have. Or, have a viet cutie come do it for you for cheapo.

They even give you ingrown hair serum and its not itchy since the entire hair has to grow back and there's no blunt end.

dunno about genes but it's pretty normal.

good point lets rub plutonium on our balls

Theyre like a 30 dollar attachment. Instead of feeling like i have to take a shower after each shit my ass is completely clean.

The virgin Nair vs the chad Magic Shaving Powder

wtf lol

>this entire thread

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I went down on a girl this morning and she had stubble and nearly puked desu (not really but fucking gross) youre a disgusting manbaby if you don't atleast trim down there and shave your chest/stomach

girl gave me head the other day and said "wow youre hairy huh"
then she told our mutual friend she feels bad she couldnt give me better head but i was too furry and it was uncomfortable. i might be seeing her again later this week, should I trim it, shave it completely, or just leave it? BTW i havent touched the hair down there in like a year so its pretty long to be fair

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>I went down on a girl

faggot
even the romans knew that is literally the gayest most beta thing you can do, you are submitting to a woman,
absolutely pathetic

>shaving your fucking chest
>adult

Unless you are literally a professional swimmer or a fashion model why the hell would you ever get rid of your own body hair as a man?

CHAD DOSN'T CARE ABOUT THIS TWINKY FAGGOTORY!!!

Lad just go to walmart and buy a small clipper. Put a short guard on it and run it through just like a regular hair cut. It will make your dick look bigger too

trim it with clippers

>its gay if you lick a vagina but not if you fuck him in the ass

Men have been memed by the faggot community that girls like shaved chests. I remember i was hooking up with a girl in europe and she asked dissapointed if i shaved my chest hair, im just not very hairy. But most girls find hair manly as long as it is well kempt they will either get over it or like it.

Yes the roman writers who said it was less gay to suck dick than do oral to women and that topping in gay sex is masculine.

Im glad the barbarians ransacked rome, fuck faggots.

>How does Chad eliminate his pubes and ass/taint hairs?

Oh yeah, it's exactly how chad operates alright, caring enough to change things about himself to appease a woman before things even get off the ground.

Shaving your body hair is for homosexuals.

I was walking about in a bottlo one night (wearing a fairly low cut singlet) and these two drunk girls came up to me and told me I'd be much hotter if I shaved my chest hair.

didnt take their advice though fuck em

Just shave brah. If you're not a tard you won't cut yourself.

it is now

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What if I want to shave/trim because it makes ME feel good?

beat me to it

Why when I google "razorless cream shave" every single website specifically says it's for porch monkeys? What about this shaving cream makes it special for negroids? Is it because they can't shave their nappy afro hair with normal razors?

This. Only downside of shaving are trumpet farts, but they're kinda hilarious

If you eat correctly, there should be no shit remaining on your ass.