Jumpchain CYOA Thread #863: Scam of the Century Edition

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I'm actually someone other than Crux, but I'm tickled that you thought that.

So, question, how hard would armor forged of jawbreakers be?

Because it's funny to me.

I took it for the points and to drag along another drawback companion. But I don't actually imagine anything happening between us because... I'm just not really into that kind of thing. For anyone. I'm basically a romantic dead zone.

But I find it kindof funny, the idea that she'd just keep trying to catch my interest and failing at it because the switch is broken.
I'm kind of terrible that way.

I also find it strange. It must basically mean that Jump-chan is mind controlling people to have a problem with it.
Seems like the kind of thing mine would do.
Maybe she just tries to drop a refrigerator on me if I give her a pity kiss. I dunno.

But, again, I don't really care.
For me? This is basically free points and a show.

> "One day, Konata, you might have breasts as big as mine!"
> "But you're flat, too."

> "If you have a nightmare, you know you can come over to my bed, right?"
> "No thanks, I don't have to sleep a lot. I'll just play video games."

> "Kona-chaaan, you know, if there's anything you want me to do for you, your big sister will be glad to help you, riiiight?"
> "Can you get me another soda?"

> For those of us with Phobias what happens when you are confronted with them, especially early on?
I'm actually terrified of heights in real life, and even get pretty bad vertigo. I imagine this made it difficult to learn how to fly...
... in my SECOND JUMP.

Avernum:

The Tower of Magi
Drop-In
Friendly Face
Crystal Magic 300
Double Strike 900
Magic 1000
Natural Magic 1600
GIFTS Attention 1500
Amnesia 1300
The Empires Eye 1000

Surprisingly went for a full thing of drawbacks for this one. No idea how this made the drive without someone cutting out the repeated sections.

Went Drop-In as I was buying 700 CP worth of both Mage and Drop-In stuff and Drop-In was cheaper.

Friendly Face is a nice freebie as well. Was a toss up between this and the magic books and I decided I could just go and find books.

Took Crystal and regular magic as you can always use more magic.

Also took Double Strike which I guess is sort of like Double Tap from Zombies. Two hits for every hit can't be a bad thing.

Drawbacks mean Leeroy needs to sit me in the warehouse and put on the video explaining who I am for a 11th or 12th time. GIFTS Attention means I'm going to be annoyed by big spiders and The Empires Eye means I'm going to be getting attacked by the Empire which means bad things for the Empire as I'm probably going into this one relatively late.

Yes.
About as hard as solidified sugar would normally be. That would be a pain in the ass to clean up later, though.

>About as hard as solidified sugar would normally be
Dude, they're EEnE jawbreakers. Those fuckers can dent steel.

>Neat. Do you mean Fall from Heaven? Those guys seemed too evil for me.

Bwa ha ha! No.

Second.

Oh, you are spider fetishist man.

But if you meant the GIFTS instead, I too have those. Those are nice. I give them out to people as gifts.

I've no plans on taking her on as a companion. By the time the Jump ends she'll be over it and probably off to university.

Besides, I married the Pokemon from Mystery Dungeon :/ about twenty Jumps later. I'm good.

Because I am lazy

Arcanum where

What are some perks that make you good at making/give you huge loads of money? What are some similar to Godfather from Mob?

In your cunt.

...

[SANDLER LAUGH INTENSIFIES]

That has to be coming from a penis or something, it's squirting out inches in front of where her cooch would be.

You are Evil and should feel bad.
Eh, I guess I am looking for stories of people freaking out and over reacting with superpowers or maybe talking about how they freaked out the first time they saw a giant version of what they are afraid of. Personally I imagine I responded to my first Giant Spider with a NOPE! and a Teleport probably leaving a few irritated companions to deal with it.... I came back for them.
Yeah probably a necessity eventually.

It was vomit.
Someone shooped the skirt in front of it.

Interesting that that was your first guess, though...

Don't test me boy.

what are the best survivability perks and food items

Zerg.

Warehouse with Forcewall and Food Supply.
Boom.
Instant survivability anywhere.

Well, half satan, I'm afraid of hights.
I'm also total badass*, and am thus capable of ignoring my fears of actual life threats.
So, yeah. T-totally not afraid of heights. I'm not sweating, its... fall lubricant. So when I go tumbling down this cliff to my certain doom, I can avoid abrasion injuries in favor of making a cool red splatter at the bottom.
All the way... down.. there...
Ha ha ha ha!

*interchangeable with dumbass

That reminds me.

How many people found what they were looking for? Did being a stranger in an even stranger war help?

You see Adam Sandler, and you think that of me? No. I am the Ralph Fiennes.

Stranger war?

No you are noseless man the superhero who promotes awareness of noselessness everywhere.

Alter ego of the villain NOSELESS who tries to destroy all perfume stands.

Didn't get the reference?
Let me give you a hand.
She's pretty cool, so chill out and enjoy the theme.
youtu.be/aWnS8iKYnbQ

Mistral go and stay go.

Postan my build for WoW

Warehouse time 50.8
Warlords of Draenor
Forsaken
Racial ability undeath
Death Knight

Unholy blight
Runeblade master
Presences
Unholy specialization 700
Frost specialization 400
Enchanting profession zen master 50
Cooking profession zen master -300

Drawbacks
RwlRwlRwlRwl -200
Leroy! 0

Another world another skeleton body.

I dont remember much of wow but from what I do know I can play pokemon with small monsters and punch some bigass dragons.

Thats what Im going to do, punch some dragons and build a giant castle. On the moon. Because why not?

Food supply? Sims 3. Become a Genie by drinking a potion (there's another to turn you back) and you can summon platefuls of amazing quality food by raising your hand above your head. Witches can also just fill you up without you needing to eat.

There's also a food replicator. And a future machine that makes tasty nutritious jelly cubes.

Ice cold, bro.

Ah, but when I ascended I got that omnipotent wish, remember? What better use for that than a nose?

He's giving the cold shoulder.

Archer has a perk that makes you the heir to billions, although I haven't a clue how or if that works in subsequent jumps. Mob has other stuff good for money, I'm pretty sure Touhou also has something like what you're asking for, as well as Echidna from Darkstalkers.

I'm just shattered.

Shaggy's Super Sandwich Supplies. Anything's a sandwich if you believe.

You have forsaken your roots and forgotten where you come from.

Don't blame yourself user. Icy that he is just a cold hearted person.

Thanks, Satan.
Your an ice guy.

This thread is already worse then the previous.

Chill out, bro. Gotta stay frosty when the place is up in flames.

People aren't whining about lolis or cucking, I say it's a massive bloody improvement.

Talk about something else if you don't like ice puns or nose talk

Besides Infamous and Avatar what are some good places to pick up cryokinesis?

Literally no one's bothered. There's other shit to talk about, no one wants to do anything besides shitposting.

Puns are fucking cancer, fuck off you shitposter no one wants you hear your disgusting unfunny """""""""""""""""""""jokes"""""""""

Isn't the moon a goddess?

Fairytale has some cool perks.

X-Men Movies and Marvel come to mind.

>Talk about something else if you don't like ice puns or nose talk
Why should I bother? No one else will.

This is true. Shaggy will put literally anything on a sandwich.

You are mistaken. Every day that I can stop and smell the roses is a day where I shall remember the journey I've undergone.

Isn't there a D&D arcane class that specializes in elemental magic? If so, that'd probably work.

100%, he's just baiting because he doesn't like people being chill and having fun. I'd ignore posts like that in the future.

SMT (micro), Narnia (macro), Avatar and Negima.

You're not wrong but I still contend it's a step up from whining about lolis and imagined fetishes.

>nobody

See, you'd have more of a point if there were fewer people participating.

Also the funny thing is, I'm not even one of them. I'm just saying you're not helping by complaining.

This.

You know, acting like that is just going to make your plans move at a glacial speed. Icy that you're a hothead, but chill, or I'll have to put you on ice, with all of your accounts frozen. And when your accounts are frozen, everyone will give you the cold shoulder.

Narnia has a White Witch tree that'd probably work. It wouldn't be 1:1 comic book cryokinesis, but it'd be pretty slick of that's what you're building.

Narnia is 2good. I want him back to make more stuff.

Whoops, 5 seconds too later 'cos of the post timer. But yeah, noted.

I thought all of the arcane classes can do elemental magic to some extent

>imagined fetishes
Yandere is a fucking fetish you fucking fetish shitposter, give up already.

All Arcane classes can get access to elemental spells, yeah. Some of them are specialized though, like they get metamagic to change spell elements or get bonus damage dice on them.

Also, if anyone here likes lightning, Dragonlance has the BEST lightning spell in all of DnD. It's basically like the sunlight spear from Dark Souls, it does great damage when combined with other Dragonlance stuff.

>I thought all of the arcane classes can do elemental magic to some extent
They can, but I swear there was a class that specialized in elemental magic. The 2E Tome of Magic is sticking in my head. Maybe look there?

I wouldn't be surprised if Pathfinder had something along those lines. PF has tons of classes.

We've hit the bottom.

Everything is shitposting.
Everything is fetishes.

At long last, CYOA Gen is proud.

What would an imagined fetish be, anyway? Chronophilia, getting turned on by the passage of time?

Good to be the first person to call the other person a baiting troll!

Fuck /jc/.

I swear I'll finish that jump someday.

>Taking the baiter seriously instead of ignoring him and having a normal conversation.

I wasn't even part of that conversation, but your powers of knowing exactly who strangers over the internet are have clearly informed you otherwise. Also I was referring to the folks yacking about cucking, not yandere.

If you used your brain you might also have noticed I was saying this thread was a step up because people WEREN'T talking about stuff like that too. So way to blame people for shit they haven't done. You're a real pillar of the community, champ.

You on the other hand, aren't helping. Just let this sad excuse of a conversation rot.

How does it differ from the regular kind of lightning spell? D'you chuck it like a javelin?

>At long last, CYOA Gen is proud.

I suddenly feel the need to take a very. very cold shower.

I want more of these greens because they are hilarious.

Holy shit the hype is unstoppable. Thank you so much Heavensanon for making this. The thought of the perk setups I could give the Eds are amazing. Is this real life? Or just fantasy?

>Not getting tuned on when watching a clock.
user...

>I swear I'll finish that jump someday.
Don't recreate the source books, that level of detail isn't needed. NWN, OOTS, and DL are good examples of how to give D&D approximate classes.

Oh god not you pun anons again.

>I'm bait, but I can't respond to being called out on it so I'll just shout about how I'm not!
I don't know why I'm responding, you're probably anti-red.

I actually think DL is too vague. I think OOTS strikes a better balance, but I understand what you mean.

Yes you do. The spell is Dalamar's Lightning Lance, it combines really well with effects that increase your spell level, which Dragonlance has a ton of, like all the Wizard of High Sorcery stuff and the Reserves of Strength feat (you can wank feats are techniques you learn through your experiences, it makes sense). Which, by the way, works really good for regenerators if you can avoid being stunned. Then it just deals damage to you.

NO user, YOU'LL SUMMON HIM!
It's snow problem man, chill.

Well then that makes the castle drom power rangers I got up there a bit lewd.

No please the puns they hurt.

Why the cold shoulder?

>I think OOTS strikes a better balance, but I understand what you mean.
See, I thought OOTS was too much like the FR jump with it's classes: just a bunch of one liners that made me look things up.

I did like the tree-perks, though. The rival, adventurer and all that? That was pretty awesome and really gave a good feel for the comic.

>Everything in here is open to discussion that isn't 'can I use Cartoon Physics to survive a nuke being dropped on me' or something similar.

tis okay user, this is why we have other perks

Honestly, he types alot like my clinically depressed friend. Guy starts ranting for hours about how everything is fucked.
You literally can't convince him otherwise.
It's just sad.
Poor stupid bastard.

Do you need an ice pack?

I just mean in the sense of having a class purchase. I'm wordy, so you won't have to worry about lacking in detail. I'd probably lay out all the class features that aren't tied exclusively to DnD mechanics, for one.

Glad you like it, user! Have fun with it, okay?
>mfw

Not helping, dude.

Your puns are horrible and you should feel horrible for making them.