What's a fair punishment for stealing Halflings in civilized lands in 5e DnD Forgotten Realms? I need to know quickly

What's a fair punishment for stealing Halflings in civilized lands in 5e DnD Forgotten Realms? I need to know quickly.

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You mean kidnapping? Im pretty sure the fair punishment is prison.

Alternately, stabbings by angry Halflings you just kidnapped when you sleep.

Halflings aren't people, user. They are like... half people. Closer to pets if anything.

Half the sentence you'd get for kidnapping normally.

While halflings are only half-people as opposed to the three-fifths people normally used for such purposes, they are more efficient economically.

Chop off their legs to make the kidnappers into "halflings."

Ah, I understand now completely.

So halflings are appliances then.

Huh. So, what's the economic coefficient of having halflings working on your average plantation? Accounting, of course, for the half portions you might be able to get away with.

Half the jail time then

A short jail sentence

Well, they seem to require twice as much food as a person of the same size (owing to their multiple stomachs), but will happily subsist on a diet of potatoes (far cheaper than fried chicken and water melon). The real advantage is that they require half as much living space and can dwell in burrows.

If you steal Halfling children, are they quarter people, or whole people, as crimes involving children of any sort tend to greater, perhaps doubled penalties?

t. China Miéville

rape

public spanking

act like a child get treated like one

Halflings aren't people.

OP here, I need a specific answer rather than a general one, the 5e sourcebooks are remarkably vague on the legal code.

And they're specifically being stolen from their owners.

Nothing. Take as many as you need.

The only case I recall of halfling theft in the book resulted in the perpetrator being mauled to death by an astral panther.

So, death by large magical cat.

>in the books

correct me if I'm wrong, but they just say to assume that what is illegal realworld is probably illegal in-game.

and so:
criminaldefenselawyer.com/crime-penalties/federal/Kidnapping.htm

now convert this into game terms.
In a nation that is predominantly urban, they'll probably be made to do jail time, will is an unescapable hell. It was worse than modern jails are today, far worse. If it's a more agrarian society, i.e. Russia, you'll probably be sentence to labor camps for a few years.
Fines may be issued to anyone who helped you, but generally only the directly guilty party will serve time.

If the setting allows it, you may also have the option of joining a semi-suicidal military unit (conscripts, trireme rowers), or one known for harsh terms of service (foreign legion, The Wall) that may or may not include service for life as a term for escaping certain death/unending jail time.

Would you mind detailing the kidnapping that occurred?

It depends on the GM. (tm)

Sauce?

Entreri lived you faggot. He hung out with Jarlaxle and they went on broventures.

Wouldn't it be theft, not kidnapping?

stealing people is kidnapping, not theft, under modern legal definition. Kidnapping is "theft of people". It's a subcategory made so certain punishments can be issued for ransomers of people rather than just regular old car thieves.

I was talking about Pasha Pook you mong.

I've been trying to read his work and...fuck, man.

I think a race of sentient Cactus dudes and women with giant beetles for heads is pretty fucking rad, but there's got to be a limit on how much Edge you can squeeze into a fucking trade paperback.

Hijabolic hentai on tumblr.

How many Halfling females of average weight can a 22-Strength Barbarian carry?

Regular-height stocks.

See

Into the stockade in the Halfing quarter for the week, adventurer.

Link?

Oh what I'd do for a creative response in a genre entirely about creativity.

Do giants count as double-people or more, then?

Since you got double trips I'll answer you honestly.

There is absolutely zero magitific proof that Halflings have souls with the quality that, say, a human soul has. Yes, they clearly have an animating life force in the same way animals do, but since dogs and horses can be ghosts, the existence of halfling ghosts does not prove that they possess the refined capacity for sapience that other humanoid creatures do. Consider their small heads and excessively simple lifestyles. Halflings do not build cities, they do not invent siege engines, they seldom innovate or create new things. Oh, they can learn, aping human carpenters to construct primitive doors for their burrows, or human cooks to produce Dalish Fries instead of eating their potatoes raw, but nothing they make is original or new. They are a race of mimics and copycats. In fact, in some parts of the Realms halflings are unable to give informed consent (although the popular legal argument currently hinges on their perpetually drunken state, they drink like dwarves but cannot metabolize it as efficiently). While those regions are clearly barbaric, it is an accepted fact of life that Halfling pussy is guilt-free pussy, and if you don't believe me you can ask that adventurer with all the Halflings because he is clearly an expert in the study of Halflings.

Only if they're 10'4" to 13'2". Otherwise we're getting into fractions.

Ackshuwally! The smaller the entity the less food by ratio. Ex: a 12 foot person actually requires 4 times as much food as a 6 foot person more or less if i recall. A halflinf being half a person means they could function off a hard boiled egg for brecky, skip lunch, then half a single lettuce leaf and small smear of peanut butter sammich for dinner. Less water too. The extra stomachs would actually compound this as it allows more time to digest the food thus increasing nutrient intake. You could house them in half the space but save 5-6 times on the food budget.

Addendum: Many magical scholars believe, just as I do, that Halflings are similar to catfolk...a race created through magically altering base animals at the whims of perverse and irresponsible wizards.

In fact, I believe based on their social structure and cultural norms that they may in fact have been produced from the ape known as the "bonobo", semi-common in parts of Chult and the surrounding regions.

Speaking of catfolk, my research also hints at a devious and truly terrifying fact. At one time, kobolds were seemingly divided into mammalian and more lizardlike subraces. Yet, past a certain date (obscured within the many cataclysms that have rocked Faerun), only the lizardlike ones appear in the historical record. Now, I cannot yet PROVE catfolk are the result of an extremely high-level wizard performing a massively potent Transmutation spell on the mammalian kobolds, but I assure you, it is my life's work to uncover the truth about this mysterious and alluring species.

I would be happy to show you my notes and research journals the net time you find yourself in Waterdeep, good sir, should you take an interest.

Disproven. Kobolds don't have a gag reflex and catfolk do. Long, long, and meticulous hours of personal research has backed this fact many times over.

Well, first of all you want the halflings working a sweatshop, not a plantation. They're weaker on average than normal people, but surprisingly proportionately more dexterous. Therefore, you want to put them to work crafting, where their lack of muscle means zilch and their natural trade off is a boon.

So Halflings are definitely a profitable thing to acquire, then? Hm, what's the average cost of an individual Halfling female of childbearing age with no deformities?

You seem to be under the wrong impression. As stated earlier its not a crime to take them as they aren't human. Just walk up to a good one, pick them up, and walk away. Hell, they aren't even that smart as most won't question the collar or new living space so long as the first thing they see is food.

>I need to know quickly.
Liar.
You just found a silly anime picture and wanted to post it on an unrelated board because you have no place else to go with it or anyone to share it with.

I bet you aren't even IN a D&D game right now, or any game at all even.

What's the point when reptilian kobolds have a mouthful of sharp teeth and no lips?

50 gold maybe?

But then again, I myself only know the value of Gold Pieces in comparison to how many chickens you can buy with them.

Based on the times I've watched kobold dinner parties. They swallow their food whole.

They do. They have this lovely bird scarfing down like motion to it too that belies the internal undulations of the esophageal passage compounding on it.

50 gold!? That's ridiculously expensive! I don't believe it could possibly be that much, particularly since these aren't trained whores, but fuzzfeet fresh off the boat from Bumblefuck Village. One gold coin is stretching it.

Those, however, are reptilian kobolds, not the mammalian ones theorized to have given rise to the catgirl race.

The ones around Baldur's Gate seemed almost like some form of chihuahuafolk.

OP here. No, it was actually hard work finding an appropriate picture.

Well now that you're here, could you expound on your predicament? For posterity, of course.

Yeah, but a solid number just isn't possible to fathom with the varying breeds, upbringings, and ages of this... theoretical halfling.
The one I was referring to was of great worth. Certainly worth my 500 chickens-worth of currency.

I want to be in this campaign.

>>HalflingRapeFace.jpg

One of my players has been stealing nubile Halflings from their owners' farms and keeping them in the PCs' base's basement. I'm sending a grizzled, too-old-for-this shit Paladin to investigate the rash of Halfling thefts next session.

>In a nation that is predominantly urban, they'll probably be made to do jail time, will is an unescapable hell.
What medieval nation is predominantly urban? Actually, what nation at all is predominantly urban? Actually, what do you mean by predominantly?

Are black halflings three-tenths people?

>Halflings do not build cities, they do not invent siege engines, they seldom innovate or create new things.
Same with women, would you say women aren't people either?

What's so hot about frilled bikinis?

hides flat-chest syndrome.

Basically, saying "the Forgotten Realms" is waaaay too broad to give a definitive answer. Faerûn is way too fucking big to generalize.

In a realistic feudal society? It would depend entirely upon the social status of halflings in that society (which is true of virtually all crimes, really) and the social standing of who's doing the kidnapping.

Basically, give more details as to the situation if you want to get a decent answer.

But even frilled bottoms are hot!

no-hips syndrome

So they are the perfect tomboy swimwear. The fact they are so feminine just makes it even better.

there's a difference between being thin and being a tomboy.
>tomboy in frills
>ever

>just force them into for the cute embarrassment
but it's not as cute as forcing them into a sun dress, so why bother?

Kobolds' suppressed gag reflex is a result of adaption to their fetid diet and living conditions. A subspecies that lives a more luxurious lifestyle would not develop that particular advantage.

They've got to wear something under the sun dress and when they pull the sun dress off to go swimming.

Yes.
Same for blacks. Doesn't matter on the race either, just anything thats black. we're not being racist here, after all.

>tfw you will never be raped by busty Halfling matrons taking advantage of your burly adventurer while he can't move, even though if he were free he could easily hold them off with one hand.

>there's a difference between being thin and being a tomboy.
True. Big-titted, wide-hipped tomboys are delicious.

>big-titted
but those will get in the way during sports!

>tfw your girl gets fucked by yo bf

>hey look I'm a racist in fantasyland im so coooool

All the more awkward and embarrassing!

Obviously.

Reddit is down the hall and to the left.

/pol/ is also not here

but a tomboy out of her element is hardly a tomboy at all!

Just use a sports bra or, if you're into it, just strap'em down with a long piece of cloth.

>binding
now this I can get into

But you can live that out (or something like it) vicariously by reading certain bawdy passages in Mary Gentles Grunts!

Specifically the ones involving a Halfling Dominatrix. Mother of a certain pair of halfling Thief brothers who are "actually probably WORSE than Kender" tier little bastards. All of the "who, me?" feigned innocence of Merry and Pippin, married with a lack of a morale compass and truly vile personal habits. (Halfings can be infuriating anyway. Criminally versatile ones that are tiny sociopaths... Why would you write that as being actually endearing?. Which is obviously the joke. Even a lot of the Orcs have a good, solid sense of a days work and propriety of a sort. More than they do anyway.)

>sports bra
and board shorts or racing briefs to go with them?

Hey, use whatever you want, I was just suggesting what my girlfriend has used when she needed to go outside for things like shopping or taking our son to play outside.

You make it sound like she doesn't go outside or wear a bra the rest of the time...

>civilized lands
Read the OP, Anons. The US is explicitly out.

hijabolic.tumblr.com/
It was basically the first result for googling "Hijabolic hentai", for me at least.
Step up, kouhai.

If she's a tomboy, she'd want to wear something to help contain herself. A sports bra is good for that, and can sometimes be daily wear for particularly busty women. She probably wouldn't wear a bra in the privacy of her own house because of comfort.

Source: growing up around women with tits like melons.
That and doing a course at uni about the human body.

She says wearing bras are uncomfortable for long periods of time, so she only wears them when outside.

>underwear is uncomfortable
>so I'll only wear it around strangers
The things girls get away with.

>living alone
>in your own place
>not just walking around nude

do you sleep with cloths on too? Christ.

Not that user, but when it's a cold night, decent track pants are a godsend.

They're only uncomfortable when worn constantly. In the short run they are very useful since it'd be more uncomfortable to have your giant tits bouncing around like a fanservice anime. Especially if you are doing something active like running to the store or trying to keep up with our energetic 4-year-old son.

>implying you will be able to steal the Halfling
>implying the Halfling won't steal YOU
All those small-size bonuses to stealth, man.

All those penalties to Strength though says otherwise. They might be sneaky buggers, but they can only steal small things like knickknacks or coinpurses. Not to mention they have no defenses to getting yoinked and taken home.

>Same for blacks. Doesn't matter on the race either, just anything thats black
It's a proven fact that a black kettle only holds three liters when a shiny one holds five.

The more I learn about female lifestyles the more jelly I am.

On a related note, how easy would it be to deport all halfings back to halflandia?