So my brother and I are just getting into D & D today. It's really complicated compared to any other game I've played...

This is true for every edition anyway, but just reading the book is all there is too it. If you only read character creation and chapters 7 through 10 in the players handbook you would probably understand all you'd need, but it would be slow if at least one of you doesn't have a deeper understanding of the rules (and a DM should obviously at least skim through some parts of the DMG)

A big problem though is that we don't have a DM.

Sorry that Veeky Forums is being pissy tonight, but it would help if you were more specific.

Do you want the basics of character creation, or how the dice-rolling works, or how to DM, or how to roleplay or what?

>Okay the problem with the rulebook...
Is that you're an illiterate fucktard. End of conversation.

I'm sorry the rulebook is written in middle-school level English and assumes you have basic functional literacy and the ability to understand and remember simple concepts.

Maybe we could get one with just simple picture diagrams for idiots like you?

The examples it uses are usually about situations rather than specific things that have a rule framework in place. Where previous rule knowledge is needed, the information is generally in order from start to finish. Don't forget to use the index at the back.

>A big problem though is that we don't have a DM.

THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU POSTING HERE?

All of the basics

>Do you want the basics of character creation, or how the dice-rolling works

Hahaha what holy shit

You're on your knees ready to suck this troll OP's cock by EXPLAINING HOW TO ROLL DICE.

Think about that for a minute. Stop and consider your life.

Then go find a group.

Read the rules to get an idea. They're very quick and simple in practice, and you'll learn by doing.

why are you still here, go look up local game stores or something

Yes, the rulebooks ideally should assume the reader is almost brain dead

You might find this helpful.
dnd.wizards.com/products/tabletop/players-basic-rules

Because I'd like to figure out how the fuck to play before I bother someone who would have to teach my dumbass

No, it shouldn't. There should be at least SOME barrier to entry, even if that is simple, basic reading ability.

media.wizards.com/2016/downloads/DND/PlayerBasicRulesV03.pdf

>Because I'd like to figure out how the fuck to play

YOU

HAVE

A

FUCKING

RULEBOOK

Well if you had to market a game wouldn't you try to include idiots by making the rules as simple to understand as possible?

What? Fuck no. Clearly fucktards like OP will buy the books anyway, even if they can't actually read.

>Can anyone explain the basics really in a very simplified way?
You decide to do things, and roll dice to see if you can do them.

What is wrong with you? As a human being?
That question is largely rhetoric, because I'm pretty sure everyone's already heard enough out of you.

>Owns a book
>Doesn't read it
>Complains on Veeky Forums that it's too hard to understand
>Asks for things explained to him
>Refuses to open the book and just read simple words.
>Cries.

Look, WotC already made their money. They sold a book. Doesn't matter if they sold it to someone who can't actually read. Still a sale. Why would I advocate making a game that allows people like OP to easily learn how to play? Why would I want someone like OP in my hobby?

This is what happens when you fail a roll to recognize bait folks.

You sound like a miserable cretin.

Hi OP.

Did this thread accomplish what you wanted it to?

You're really not one to talk, since it seems that you have trouble understanding "that's enough out of you."

Hahaha are you fucking serious? Do you literally just go around to threads and tell people to stop posting, and expect anyone to actually listen to you? Is that really how your life works?

Hard to tell if this is 10/10 trolling or if everyone is tthis thread is super salty. Either way, very funny.

It generally gives the person a chance to either calm down, or to reveal that they're just a troll. You've chosen the latter, which kind of invalidates any continued posting from you.

Pole, meet throat.

Then you can't play in the first place, so there's no point in explaining anything. Especially since whatever GM you find might not even be using 5e.

I don't know if telling him that reading the book is the only way he'll learn the rules is all that salty. A game can usually handle one or two new people if the others know what they're doing and for the illiterate that's probably the only hope, but from the sound of it the OP doesn't actually have a group of experienced people to lean on.

I'd say if someone is particularly committed to not reading they basically have three options: Get at least two other people to read the book for you, only use the rules you can understand at first glance (basically monster manual entries and things you'll directly copy onto your character sheet) and just wing the rest until you actually give a shit, or just not fucking playing. I suppose watching one of those streams or whatever could also help if he outright has no idea on how DnD fundamentally works or something

Australia/10

Someone who refuses to help themselves does not deserve help.

Find a DM or decide if one of you two wants to DM. That is the first step. If neither of you is comfortable DMing then read the rules until one of you is familiar enough to DM. Even people very experienced with the game can't play without a DM and your experience and rules will vary greatly depending on the one you play with.

i think what he's referring to is the fact that they give examples of play. it can be poorly written but i don't believe that it's in 5th edition only saw it in 2ed and 3rd