*CRASH*

*CRASH*
>IT'S THE FUCKING IRS COLLECTION DEPARTMENT! GET ON THE FLOOR! YOU DIDN'T PAY YOUR CAPITAL GAINS TAX!
>HE HAS A WEAPON OR A DILDO!
*BANG BANG*

Friendly reminder to pay your taxes before you get killed by the IRS

FUCKK YU

MY QUADS WILL DESTROY THE IRS

AAAAAAAA

YOU CAN TAKE MY GAINS FROM MY COLD, PINK HANDS
*BAM BAM BAM BAM*
AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

A Russian hacker stole all my coins 6 months ago, sorry goys.

I don't have capital gains. Bitcoin is not worth anything.

We'll just take this ledger nano and if you don't give us your password we won't give it back. Ha!

>actually we will just charge you with FELONY impeding an investigation
I don't know what your talking about I dont own a ledger, just a shit ton of USBs..

Too bad the only record of my transactions is on a chinese website with none of my identifying information.

good thing my recovery codes are somewhere else

they'll go grab a wrench

>certain sequences of 0s and 1s are illegal
>certain sequences of 0s and 1s are taxable
Americans are retarded

>implying I wouldn‘t call my Jewish Lawyer and get millions from the government cuz they hurt me

Who's the judge gonna believe, kid.. You, or the IRS?

"Jason hand me the sock and soap instead"

americans are idiots, imagine buying a wine at some special price because he's a friend of yours

suddenly that friend wins a price and his wine becomes rare and expensive, but you already drank it a year ago

now the IRS shows up and tells you you owe them taxes because your cheap wine is now worth thousands? is this actually whats happening?

Everything in this universe is just an arrangement of information.

That's not how it works at all

I'm an American citizen but I live in the UK so I use British pounds, I have no clue what the fuck to do

You tell me

>trade magic internet coins
>get shot

You can't cash out anyway so they can't tax you.

kek you can't even go to jail for not paying taxes.

It's more like
>Don't pay capital gains
>2 months later you get a phone call from IRS
>hey...pay those taxes and some interest now, ok?
>Ok
>still don't pay
>Ok...seriously this time...pay it. More interest.
That's it.

>he fell for the "you need to cash out to fiat before you owe capital gains tax" meme

>kek you can't even go to jail for not paying taxes.

Literally This. America is the most Jewish country on earth. I can't wait until the blood of all IRS agents is flowing through the streets in the upcoming uprising, I hope their children and wives are killed too.

I was just meming but if you literally can't cash out then the IRS's case would be dismissed in 10 seconds in court if they tried to force the issue.