Girls und Panzer: Lafayette Girls Academy Quest 2: #33

> Friday, July 10th, 2015

SITUATION: pastebin.com/ziMsX6th
MECHANICS: pastebin.com/49M2eE8Z
THE RULES: pastebin.com/BEsprkBZ
THE TANK: pastebin.com/sJsgig6B
THE DIVISIONS: pastebin.com/xCQZAdqU
THE SHOP: pastebin.com/v6xeDRXj

Media Day. Everyone was busy making themselves look good for the picture taking scheduled in the late afternoon, right around the time you get off work actually. The Etiquette Club was the only club not doing anything to actually prepare, being prepared from Day 1. Everyone else was putting on their makeup, washing their faces in the river, shaving their legs and rubbing lotion on their arms and faces. Even the Poles and the Motorcycle Club were dressing themselves up a bit, brushing their hair in deliberate attempts to make the unkempt styles look good.

Your own crew was no exception. Winona was checking herself out in the mirror rested on Oliver’s engine deck, and to that she carefully applied a nice coat of lipstick. She looks over however to see Stack resting herself on the ground, hair frazzled, arms folded, and a healthy coating of dirt on her cheeks. “Stack, come on!” Winona whines to her. “At least brush your hair.”

“We drive tanks every weekend, all the makeup and stuff you guys do is gonna be pointless after a good day of tanking,” she says. Well, she’s got a point. Stack opens one eye, shining it to Winona. “Y’all are too concerned with the ‘materiel’ and the physically attractive. Not enough on the inner beauty.”

[1/2]

[2/2]

Winona huffs. “Is this because your boobs haven’t grown in?”

“Hmph, I’m proud of my body, however undeveloped it is!” Stack flexes her arms, grinning at Winona. “You should try being proud of yourself too, Winona!”

You walk up to the two of them, having refreshed yourself in the river and washed up. “You two seen Ingrid?”

“Campfire eating breakfast,” says Winona. “Were you planning on going on a date with her or something?” You gently slap Winona, shutting her up. She giggles a little.

> “I’m off to work.”
> TAKE VACATION DAY: 4
> Other

> “I’m off to work.”

>“I’m off to work.”

>> “I’m off to work.”
Take care of Ingrid while I'm gone.

> “I’m off to work.”

>> “I’m off to work.”

>TAKE VACATION DAY: 4

We need to fix her morale!!!

Also, pic related as per tradition

> “I’m off to work.”

“I’ll be at work today,” you say. “Guys, I want to you take care of Ingrid while I’m gone okay?” The both of them nod. “Try and make her feel a bit better, okay? I can’t have someone be so… down before a match.”

“Right,” says Stack. “We’ll do our best.”

“Thanks.”

-

-

“Media Day, wow!” Denise looks back, grinning happily. “I can’t wait! I wonder how many pictures they’re going take of you.” Her Kettenkrad weaves right through traffic, getting you to work fast as water in a drain. “Oh! Are they going to do a swimsuit edition!?”

“I’d rather they not,” you say.

“But suppose they did.”

“Denise.”

“Okay, I’ll watch the road.”

Your Kettenkrad arrives outside of the offices, and much to your surprise, you find a waiting crowd of girls. “There she is!” It’s only about a dozen of them, but it’s definitely enough to take you off your guard. “Elodie!” One of them holds up the spent casing of a 57mm shell, the same one used on your Six Pounder. “I’ve been holding onto this since your match with GWMA, can you sign it for me?” You squint closer.

… There are other signatures too! Iris, and Griselda, and Serafina! Where did she get this!?

“Sign my stuff too!” says another girl.

“And mine!”

> Only sign the shell.
> “Sorry, no autographs.”
> Sign everybody’s things.
> Other

Slight pause, gotta do yardwork.

Discuss who's the lewdest.

> Sign everybody’s things.

You posted her.

>Sign everybody’s things.

> Only sign the shell.

Sorta depends on what they are wearing, too (i.e. micro bikinis, lingerie, etc.)

>> Only sign the shell.
>> Sign everybody’s things.
Well, everything that isn't lewd, at least.

Winona is lewdest on ship, Rosehip is lewdest GuP.

Orange Pekoe is cutest

Kill jester

> Sign everybody’s things
Elodie is lewdest girl.

denise is a subtle sort of lewd

> Sign everybody’s things.

But no body parts.

> Sign everybody’s things.

GermanSchteel is clearly the lewdest!

>Constantly going on about games with balls
>Short skirts. Short skirts everywhere
>Purest love is everywhere.

So lewd

user has a point. I am forced to agree.

>shoving a bunch of girls in a cramped, rumbling war machine

Back, writing update.

You all have good taste.

Except this user here.

>Except this user here

A truer truth has never been spoken.

> Sign everybody’s things.

“Okay, okay, everyone form an orderly line then.” Denise hands you a sharpee and a ballpoint to sign with. You quickly put down your signature on the 57mm shell, right between Griselda and Iris. Trying to save space for the others after all. “Right here you go.” The girl with the shell squeals happily, then steps out of line.

The next one immediately unbuttons her blouse and shows her bra to you.

You proceed to sign her forehead. “Next.”

-

-

You sigh, sliding down into your seat. Hilda and Denise are already busy at work in theirs. Seems your day off hasn’t done too much damage to the environment. Maybe to your reputation, but… Hilda looks over at you. “So, do you know what tanks Sherbrooke will be fielding?”

“Not yet,” you say. “But really, I just want to work then get myself to Media Day and have that be that.” Truth be told, you’re getting exhausted by the idea of being a celebrity. Not just any celebrity, an “approachable” celebrity. Ugh, if this is what girls do for autographs, you dare not think what guys want. The thought makes you shudder.

Denise looks over at you, putting her phone down. “I just got off from Block Officer Hatteberg. She needs the finished WLR (Weekly Logistics Report) down to her office. The Office girls haven’t finished it yet.”

> Go oversee them until they do.
> Forget it, you’ll do the WLR yourself.
> Eh, Office workers will get it, no need to micromanage.
> Other

doodle'd a thing

> Forget it, you’ll do the WLR yourself.

cute

have a nationals gif

and bigger

> Go oversee them until they do.

>Other
Check in with the Office girls. See what's delaying the WLR

>micro bikini

Reminder that just about ANY average bikini we wear is a micro bikini for us.

Cute, user.

> Go oversee them until they do.

This user's got it.

glasses

> Forget it, you’ll do the WLR yourself.

>Go oversee them until they do.

> Go oversee them until they do.

-

-

You open the door into the Office Complex, where several dozen girls of all majors, ranks, and grades are sitting in cubicles typing up reports and delivering them to the right places. Honestly, you’re not sure how the paperwork works, but you do know that it’s important. Hence why you’re coming in to oversee what’s going on. You stop by the cubicle of one of the Logistics supervisors, a girl with thick glasses squinting at her monitor. “Oh, the WLR? Yeah, we’ve been delayed a bit due to a system crash this morning. Thankfully we managed to recover most of our data but yeah, it might get delayed just a wee bit.”

“Well, it’s due today at 4 sharp,” you say. “How late do you think it’ll be?”

She shrugs. “Could be an hour at least. We gotta put the report into the system first, then it has to compile, then we have to print it, and these WLRs are at least 200 pages in length.” Poor trees. “Sorry, but that’s the gist of it.”

“Alright, well, is there anything I can do to help?” you ask. She smiles. “Besides signing you an autograph.” She frowns again.

“Hmmm…” She taps her chin, thinking. “Well, I mean, you being here is help enough er-… Have you ever done our document management work?” Well, no. You’re trained in it, but you’ve never done it, two different things. “It’s kind of finicky so…”

> “Get me a computer and I’ll have this done by morning.”
> “Nah, it’s fine. I’ll see if I can divert some people to you.”
> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”
> Other

> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”

> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”
Yeah, even with training, it's not gonna help jumping in.

> “Nah, it’s fine. I’ll see if I can divert some people to you.”
> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”
We can always pick up details of how to work on this while we go along.

> “Nah, it’s fine. I’ll see if I can divert some people to you.”
> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”

Update Hatteberg on the WLR delay.

>ELODIE is frenzied!

> “Get me a computer and I’ll have this done by morning.”

> “Get me a computer and I’ll have this done by morning.”
Elodie too scary

...

>> “Nah, it’s fine. I’ll see if I can divert some people to you.”
>> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”

>“Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”

"I'm gonna shove this fist so far up your ass you'll look like a Muppet!"

p-please don't sexualise me!

> “Nah, it’s fine. I’ll see if I can divert some people to you.”
> “Alright, fine, I’ll make some coffee.”

“Alright, I’ll make coffee. Denise.” Denise smiles happily, looking to you. “Go find some people who aren’t doing anything necessary and have them help the girls here finish out the WLR. Make sure they know it’s rush.” Denise salutes, quickly running off. “Hilda.” Hilda tilts her head. “… do finance things I guess.”

“Sometimes I wonder why I’m even here,” Hilda says.

-

-

After a round of coffee for eight combined girls working on the WLR (plus another twenty conscripted to work on it), you find that progress is now picking up. The supervisor told you that with the added manpower plus the quick fix of coffee, they should be able to have the WLR just in the nick of time. You’ve already informed Block Officer Hatteberg of the issue, and she says that she needs it regardless of whether it’s late or not.

Eh, you guess she doesn’t care for punctuality. Punctuality is key to all things.

You receive a phone call however from…

> MOM

… uh oh. You quickly excuse yourself out into the hallways where you can talk alone with her. “Elodie.”

“My, my, so formal! How’s our favoritist littlest girl doing? I hear tomorrow you’re gonna be facing Sherbrooke.”

> Boast
> Neutral
> Polite

> Polite

>Boast

> Polite

We are. I'm looking forward to it.

>Boast
Them 8-bit tanks won't know what hit them.

> Polite

>> Neutral
Not looking bright, but then again, they say that the darkest hour is right before the dawn.

> Polite
Given our current team situation, lets be calm about this and not get over our heads.

>Polite

Let's not overcommit. We've a decent chance, but anything can happen out there.

> Polite

“We are. Sherbrooke’s supposed to be a pretty good team but I think we can make a win out of it. It honestly is kind of important we win a series around the middle mark. Otherwise we might fall out of contention,” you say.

“Yeah, I’m still getting used to the NATO rules, it used to be single elimination in my time and that was that. I guess this new format though leaves room for error.”

“Yeah. We did pick up a new crew, and we might end up using a King Tiger in our match.”

“Oh, not going with the Panzer IV?”

“Huh?”

“Kit Blumenthal on the Tankery front tells us LGA acquired a Panzer IV, I would’ve used that. It’s a great tank for beginners compared to the heavy. If you had another Sherman though, well-“

“You’re rambling, Mom.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s been so long since I got to do Tankery, you know? I’m finally getting back into it! My little girl’s gonna be an All-Star I reckon!”

“Oh yeah, Mom uh…” Maybe now’s the time to ask. “Mom, you never really talked about your Tankery experiences, have you.”

“Oh, well, I mean- I wasn’t really that great of a player. It wasn’t too special, don’t worry about it, sweetie. Um, you know your Dad’s busy at work, then he’s gotta pack the car. We’re already planning on making the trip to your match!”

“… I mean, you don’t have-“

“Too late! We’re going! Guess what, family of crewmembers eat and watch for free, we’re not passing that up!”

You sigh. “Alright, Mom. Well, later.”

“Later, sweetie, maybe we’ll catch you at the site!”

And with that, you hang up. Ugh, parents. Another reason not to lose, you suppose.

You step back into the office and start talking with the Supervisor. “How’s the WLR?”

“It’s compiling now,” she says. “Once it’s all printed, we need to deliver it to Hatteberg’s Office. I suppose you can do that for us?”

> “Sure.”
> “That’s your job, not mine.”
> Other

> “Sure.”

>> “Sure.”

then wink

> “Sure.”
No reason to not try and lend a hand.

>“Sure.”

> “Sure.”

>> “Sure.”
>> Other
"Help me out in the future, Ok?"

Here switching to add what user said here

this user again, i also like to dress like a little girl

Go with A favour owed is always good.

Who doesn't?

> “That’s your job, not mine.”
>>> Other

Take some time to investigate mom's tankery past.

> “Sure.”

“Sure thing,” you say.

The Supervisor smiles. “Thanks, we owe you one!”

After waiting for about a half hour for it all to compile and then print, you finally have the 200 page stack of pages on all the Logistics happenings aboard the ship. The fact that it all fits on 200 pages is astounding to you. You, Denise, and Hilda split off into even sections, then say goodbye to the Office Complex.

-

-

After a short trip through the halls of the Logistics Department, you meet with Block Officer Hatteberg at her office. You play the WLR on her desk, and watch as she files through each and every one. As that happens, you do note that Hatteberg has a lot of posters of WWII airplanes. Maybe she’s a Skycraft fan? She even has a model of a Ju-87 Stuka on her desk as well.

She leans back in her seat. Nodding to you after filing through it. “Very good,” she says hoarsely.

Alright, you’re done for today then!

> JOB COMPLETE
> + 5 CP

-

-


After packing everything away in your office, you end up on the back of Denise’s Kettenkrad. Hilda as well, having nothing better to do today, decides to follow you. “Alright, where to?”

> Rally with crew
> Meet up with Griselda (Briefing)
> Tank HQ
> Other

> Meet up with Griselda (Briefing)

>Rally with crew

How is Ingrid?

This is important!

>> Meet up with Griselda (Briefing)

>> Meet up with Griselda (Briefing)

>> Rally with crew
Let's check on Ingrid, hopefully the rest of the crew have cheered her up (instead of just annoying her in a bad way)

>Rally with Crew
Start with the most pressing need.

>Rally with crew

Ingrid

Are there any rules on the extremely unlikely event of a tank running out of ammo in a match?

I mean, stranger things have happened in-universe like a BT-42 with "active sonar" and a Hetzer supporting the weight of a Maus.

If the tank still functions, then it's still part of the match regardless of ammo count. It's generally accepted amongst most tanks that if you run out of ammo, the only real way to contribute is to be either a shield or a battering ram.

Could always have it work as an adhoc engineering vehicle (knock stuff over, pull things with tow cables) without a crane if it can handle the stress, or just put it in a support role like scouting if the tank is capable for it.

> Rally with crew

-

-

“How’s Ingrid doing?” you ask. Your crew have apparently gathered for a meal outside of a pizza place, where they’ve got themselves slices of pepperoni, anchovies, and beef pizza. Hilda immediately dug in when Winona offered and was wolfing down slices, much to Stack and Josephina’s surprise.

Winona says, “Ingrid’s been feeling a little bit better, right Ingrid?”

Ingrid, sitting next to Winona, nods. “Yeah, yeah, I just needed a bit of time to think as well.” Her arms are folded, and on her plate, her pizza is mostly just getting cold. Hilda leans over, pointing to it, to which Ingrid hands the plate to her. Hilda immediately eats it all. “Don’t worry, I’m in shape for the match, Ellie.”

> + 10 MORALE TO INGRID

“Alright, if you say so,” you say. “You guys ready for Media Day then?” Everybody nods. “Great.”

Winona rubs her hands, smiling. “I’m so excited! I even decided to wear my sexy undies today!” … she what?

“That’s crass,” says Stack.

“Hmph!” Winona turns her nose up. “Please, sexy undies are for special occasions, this is a special occasion. I bet even Ellie was considering wearing hers, right?” Everyone stares at you. “… right?” Ah fuck, did you pause?

You nod slowly. “Yeah, sure.”

“You don’t have sexy undies, do you,” says Ingrid.

“S- sure I do!” you claim. “I mean… d-… do boxers count as sexy undies?”

Stack raises her hand. “To me they do.” Winona slaps her upside the head.

“After the match, we’re going shopping,” says Winona.

> “Ah, forget it! It’s just underwear!”
> “Whatever.”
> “Hey, there’s more to sexiness than underwear like uh… um… yeah!”
> Other

>Other
No.

And give Ingrid a friendly light hug.

>“Ah, forget it! It’s just underwear!”
The line must be drawn HERE! This far, no further!

> “Hey, there’s more to sexiness than underwear like uh… um… yeah!”

>BT-42 with "active sonar"
I thought that was the Finn bard playing some sick tunes that enhanced her crew. There are no rules for or against it because it's not a thing that happens that often.

>> “Ah, forget it! It’s just underwear!”

>“Whatever.”
We'll need a frame of reference. Winona needs to show them.

> “Ah, forget it! It’s just underwear!”

Boyshorts can be sexy!

>> “Whatever.”

...

> “Hey, there’s more to sexiness than underwear like uh… um… yeah!”
Stack continues to be a pretty fun tomboy.

> “Ah, forget it! It’s just underwear!”

“Forget about it, it’s just underwear, Winona.”

“Ha! Just underwear, can you believe that?” says Winona to Stack. Stack rolls her eyes. “Anyway, it’s just about that time, want to head to the Tank HQ we can Media Day sorted?” You nod. “Alrighty then!” Your crew all stand up and head on over to the Cromwell. You tell Denise to follow up with Hilda on the Kettenkrad. But before you leave, you grab Ingrid and stop her for a second.

“Hey, Ingrid, you sure you’re doing alright?”

“I’m fine,” she says. “Seriously, look, I realize I’m not exactly uh… athlete material. But, I’ll try my best.”

You smile a little. “That’s all I can ask.” You pat her arm, smiling widely. “Just put on a good smile for the cameras, okay?”

Ingrid smiles a bit. “Will do.”

-

-

You now know why the boys did not bomb you yesterday. It’s because they wanted front row seats to Media Day, and nobody would ever allow that happen with a bombing in recent memory. They all stand outside the Tank HQ’s hangar, where the main action is happening with greenscreens, spotlights, and high def cameras set up. “Whoooweee! It’s Ellie Zumwalt, boys!” Oh fuck, they see you walking in with your crew. They start whistling and catcalling you. “Hey, Ellie! A smile’s all you need for pictures you know, don’t be shy!”

You lower your head a bit, trying to cover up your blushing. Ugh, BOYS!

“Oh shut up!” yells Stack to them.

“Yeah, get out of here!” The boys all laugh, continuing to watch the picture show go on.

Still, it’s mostly harmless, the photographers from NATO and Topps are already out in full force, getting the pictures they need. Makeup people as well are on standby to dress up if needed.

However, you do note that one person is missing out of all of them. Griselda.

> Take your pictures and get it over with.
> Go find Griselda.
> Do something about the boys, it’s not proper to be ogled during your photos.
> Other

> Go find Griselda.

>> Go find Griselda.
Is something wrong with the GrisGris?

>> Go find Griselda.

> Go find Griselda.
Who cares about boys when our leader is missing?

>> Go find Griselda.
Also, toss Stack at the boys.