Pathetic Marines: Damnos was a piece of coke in comparison Edition

Mmmmhhh...
mmmmm
mmmm
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
*thinking intensifies*

To dump images or not to dump images...
'Tis truly is a dilemma.

Also, we need to continue the fight against those Necrons, yes, we did agree to retreat, but the suicide ship was still on it's way and there were a few (a couple, maybe) turns left

Nope, now it's time for me to slumber, 'tis a late hour indeed now.

See you tomorrow, my honorable battle brothers!

If i have the order of events right, you and I are to hold off the Necron forces while our brothers escape, and then we teleport out. That's the plan anyway. Whenever the person controlling the Necrons returns, we can get started again. Though it is getting kind of late where I am.

Goodnight my brother! May you dream of Pathetic Glory!

and back!

Oh boy! But Captain Ismael went to bed, so it might have to wait for tomorrow, fuck.

These guys sound like they get killed more often than my custom chapter that had to be renamed the Emperor's Martyrs.

So you guys just want a grey Marine with a green angle bracket pauldron mark?

Yeah pretty much, the point is that they scrapped of the paint if their former chapters to be a pathetic grey, if you're going all out we wouldn't mind some leftover scratches of colors

I promise I will gallantly lead the IX company through our Vox system in the safety of the reliquary. So brothers,what else is there to do but for you to charge the nearest enemy?

Guys, what do you think about this variant of our insignia?

Holy fuck I love it

Thread is empty, so it's time to show off my pathetic photoshop skill.

...

...

...

...

...aaand that's all folks!

>OOC

10/10 would RIP AND TEAR again

Damn. Forgot to put chapter's insignia on the kneepad, here's a new one.

Holy Emperor that's awesome, thanks for doing that brother!

An acceptable amount of ook.

What was your process for making these?
I've started on one for myself but holy shit it's terrible. Truly pathetic.

>OOC
Great work.

It involved a lot of cutting and color manipulation in paint.net, but the hardest part was finding images that fit well together.

You are much better than me with paint.net, its what I was using and I got pic related.

Hey, looks good enough to me!

Hi guys, I've been away for a little while. What ahve I missed, can someone fill me in?

We had to deal with some Eldar and now we are going up against some Necrons and a C'Tan shard.

>OOC
Holy Emperor's balls

The pics are amazing

I'll immediately notify the inquisitor writing the our wiki !

>OOC

I imagine Jokearo would say
''Ook''
(Read as: I got the biggest hat, therefore I'm the holiest among us.)

>OOC
I'd just read it as "Ook."

We boarded an Eldar vessel.
The Captain of the 5th died.
The Chapter Master lost a leg.
I got an eye operation so that I'd be not-so-blind.
We boarded a Necron Tomb-asteroid.
Patheticnought Neutron Blaster exploded, again.
The captain of the 4th was gravely wounded and brought back to the Bastion.
We destroyed a Necron monolith.
Our Chapter Master was rolling continuously 18s, 19s and 20s.
Captain Necron Staff of Light brother No.1 showed us how to stay behind and look for afar.
A large part of the 8th and the 9th were annihilated.
The Captain of the 9th is driving the captured Eldar ship towards the Tomb-asteroid at ramming speed.

>tl:dr
We lost around 100 marines in a day.
We lost a major character.
Our Chapter Master is on the road of sianthood.

...

Welocme in the 10th, brother sergeant!

So just a normal day then...

Oh wait, your name is already in the Ranks!
Then..
Welcome back, brother!

Totally, absolutely and pathetically normal.

I blew things up!

Oh yeah, that too.
Jokearo used a gauntlet-thingie, that is the jokearo corrispondent for a titan weapon!

imgflip.com/gif/17kj0w

My brain is potato, I can't into saving gif normally

...Someone should draw that.

>OOC
You're not wrong

Good Morning Battle-Brothers!

Brothers I have returned!

Ook.

BROTHEEEE-waitaminute, I think I might be lost, you there, Orangutan, tell me how to get to the metal gear thread.
>Ook ok-ok ook-ok-ook, ook eek, ok-ook ok-ok.
Thank you.

>OOC
boards.Veeky Forums.org/tg/thread/48338200/inquisitorial-penal-regiment-tg-call-of-duty#top
You know, I can't help but think our attack on this tomb world may have fucked the Penal regiment over somewhat

Although my vision isn't the best he looks like one of ours but his voice filter sounds off.
A most glorious recap brother and a true demonstration of the Emperor's worst can do!
Welcome back brother

I thought we were the VIII Company?

My brothers, I have returned!

How so?

All and all, I'd say it was mostly a success. Especially once we get that Shard to put into our main gun or some crazy shit!

You know those c'tan are energy and you know what else is energy? Fire! you know what you can do with fire? Cook stuff, what I am saying we get some of the scouts together we can cook meals of grandeur never seen before.

Only if we had something to cook besides our rations, brother, only if we had...

Sounds good!

You are a GENIUS brother!

But what's the point in cooking? I've always preferred raw meat anyway...

Wait a second, are you people gonna use THE DAMNED SHARD for that!? Don't you realize that it would be incredibly...

...pathetic. Right. Forgot about that.

And what would you have us do brother?

...

I'm asking, we don't have a lot of ideas for the Shard of Ultimate Powa at this point.

our ship consumes other ships let it consume the shard!

Actually, why not just feed it the Tomb World?

Well, the Tomb World isn't going to exist for very much longer, as Captain Davik has sent the Eldar ship hurtling towards it at ramming speed.

and we wouldn't get sweet upgrades that may or may not try to tempt us with forbidden power

But hey, Bastie gets more rooms, so there's that.

And while I still believe that WEAPONIZING is a good alternative, this idea seems very interesting, albeit risky. You see, this is something that has never been done before, but it could greatly improve our Bastion's capacities.
Or it could turn the whole chapter into soulless murder automatons.
Or make us all go insane with forbidden knowledge.
Or the shard might try to take over the ship.
Or any possible combination of this C'tan fuckery.

But you'll never know if you won't try, right?

Also, the Tomb is filled with hostile Necrons. And you and I both know nobody wants to be the one to have to hunt all of them down if they spread to the other parts of the Bastion.

Hmmm, that is possibly the most valid argument I've ever heard. Very well! Once we find the Shard amidst the rubble of the Tomb World, we shall fuse it to the Bastion of Weaknesses core, and see what happens!

it'll be fun!

I think we should loot the tombsteroid and let Bastie eat it. And incorporate it that way. Either way the C'Tan is getting nommed.

I'm afraid that's too dangerous EVEN for us. The Shard is a very delicate thing, and, in order to transport it safely to our fortress, we must use a tesseract labyrinth, a.k.a. "that strange box thingy". If I recall correctly, some of our marines from VII Company were reporting about "these useless boxes that don't do anything". We should find one as quickly as possible.

what if the bastion incorporates a strange boxy thing?

We ctually tried once to feed it the strange box thingy.
The Bastie threw it up on us, along with some techno-magic-bullshit-puke.

what if it ate it with a shard?

Probably we would have an even more disgusting AND hilariously pathetic scene.

So order of business is:
>Kill the necrons in the tombsteroid and stop them from coming back.
>Loot the tombsteroid and Box the Shard.
>Incorporate the Eldar ship into Bastie
>Incorporate the Tombsteroid into Bastie
>Feed the Box to Bastie.

>OOC
I like to imagine Bastie feeds on ships like a weird mix of a slime mold and a cone snail (she embeds part of herself into said ship, grows into the systems and then rearranges it slightly) give her enough time ans she could probably eat the rock encasing the tombsteroid as well.

If we use the strange box thingy we may get a neat defence turret for the core of the bastion! (that may or may not shoot everything that comes close)
I have heard shards take heavy artillery to the face and then die to shurkien blasters or maybe I was being shot by heavy artillery? The point may yet stand they have volatile durability!
Most of those sound like not too bad outcomes!
the murder automatons would make us the moist lethal legion
Insane would mean we become 1% less efficient I will show you my math
> displays braille that nobody understands
and taking over the ship will mean if we subdue the shard we would have a reliable pilot!

>Incorporate the Eldar ship into Bastie
The eldar vessel is already on a ''ramming speed!'' course with the tombsteroid, brother.

Brother, are you sure you aren't a techmarine?
Because that is exactly how we're gonna do it.

Really? That's bad news, it might be not as easy as I initially thought.
Where are our techmarines at this moment? I swear, if they are toying with xenotech again...

I believe that is our plan, yes.

Okay, so, an addendum of that:
Incorporate what ever is left of the Eldar ship into the Bastie.

But brother, her
>touches a part of the braille
you miscalculated a thing, and what do you mean by ''have a reliable pilot''?!?
>Eyes light up with eldritch energy
The Bastion is already this self aware being of unspeakeble intellect, capable of think and discuss with itself things so complex our mind can't even conceive!

>OOC
*here, not her

It's pathetic how a single letter can fuck up my already badly articualted sentences!

Wait. WHAT!? Ohh, this might be very bad, very...

...it seems we're getting a transmission, brothers.

Oh no.

Well, we all know the plan now. All that needs to happen now is for Captain Ismael, his Terminators, and I to escape the Tombsteroid!

>OOC

When will the guy playing the Necrons return? I miss him and I want the current adventure to conclude.

>OOC
Man, I love you photoshop skills!

Are you ok if this is used for the wiki in the future?

>OOC
I am more than okay! Actually, that's the reason why I'm still doing these!
Oh, and the pics above are also me, by the way.

>OOC

You are a hero, you know that?

Oh boy, what a nap.

So, how have you guys bee-

Is that a c'tan shard?
Is that Eldar ship being rammed into a....
...Cmon brothers, next time you're going to be pathetic at least wake me up first!

Don't worry snacks, it is just my many siblings here to help out.
And eat all of you as well

>OOC
Man, I'm having a blast with these threads.
And while we're not as popular as the penal regiment, at least we've got quality OCs.

>OOK
That we have.

Are you implying that we're not pathetic ALL the time, brother?

It is I your gallant devastator company leader and I have returned!

What on Terra are you doing brothers! I'm appalled with immense glee from your patheticness. Carry on! I'll be out of the reliquary shortly, I promise this time. Get my honor guard to drag me out if they must