POST STORIES FROM YOUR DND GAMES

Bobby was not amused and was pissy for a bit, but got over it.
>Fast forward to 2008, halfway through one of the two long-running campaigns (one of these things lasted 5 years, shit was cash)
>Drow successfully take control of a city we were in. Slay the Lord, usurp power and all that
>Party of 10 level 6-9s is split in every direction, Narrator begins laying down some sexy-ass plot hooks so that we can prepare to retake the city
>Except for my human character, who's captured by the drow
>The same character who used a ring of wishes to essentially gain immortality (basically got all the regenerative perks of a vampire without any of the other shit, which was nice)
>Drow take special notice of this, strap him to a table, and begin a VERY long experiment trial period, GM kindly explains I'm out of the mission until rescued (which is fine, I head on over to one of the other tables and play there)
BUT
>As the GM explains that the drow Matriarch has taken a 'special interest' in my character's power, bobby speaks up
>"So fucking lucky, I wish I had the attention of a Drow queen"
>Entire fucking table looks at him like he's lost his mind
>Especially me. Dude I'm going to be a science fair frog diorama for who knows how long.
>He ignores our stares, declares his half elf is making a daring rescue.
>We all know why.
>Actually gets pretty far in before getting spotted.
>Begins chatting up the Drow guards, CHAs them up something fierce.
>Happily forgets that they're drow, and he's a half-elf
>Gets murdered hard, then complains like a bitch as he writes up the next character

I'm out of that campaign for almost 3 months, so I wasn't there for most of what happened next.

My half orc bard did something similar.

Except instead of convincing, he turned in three party members with excessive bounties on their heads.

They all fought back of course, with one dying in the process and the other two went into custody afterwards.

Managed to pin all of the blame on the dead one in court after collecting the bounties for all three.

Bought an airship and am now skypimp hard rock half orc.

Didn't like the character who died IC or OOC, so everything turned out pretty okay.

(Cont.)
>Fucking kickass siege takes place, everyone's at the table
>Our party has assembled a kickass army to take out the drow
>Goblins, bandits, fucking robots, all manner of warriors from different countries
>A FUCKING T-REX WITH BADASS ROBOT ARMS HOLY SHIT I CAME WHEN IT WAS DESCRIBED TO ME
>We're all involved, one of our guys sneaks in and breaks me out (GM 'very' kindly gave me a level up while I was in captivity, too), I proceed to repay the kindness of the Drow with stabbings.
>All of us are involved, except Bobby
>I don't know why. He's at the table, but no character sheet is in front of him and he's not actually doing anything.
>Six metal-as-hell hours later, and 5 of us have the Matriarch beaten, the drow are chased out of the city and goddamned are we hailed as kings
>Including the T-Rex who is apparently an ACTUAL king of lizard people or something, I was VERY distracted by this thing I hope you understand.
Anywho
>After many rewards, the other players tell me how they got the army assembled.
>Our fighter and monk beat the shit out of several goblin chiefs and were being worshiped as god-kings
>Wizard and one rogue went and did some stuff in a dense jungle for a month and a half, that's where Badassasaurus Rex came from
>Druid, other Rogue, and both Clerics were on diplomatic assignments for the entire time, convincing basically every lord and king we knew to lend us aid
>I was a human pincushion
>But then I learned what Bobby did.
>He was allowed to bring in a level 6 Character so as to not be too far behind
>Rogue
>High Cha
>Suspiciously similar name to the last guy
>IMMEDIATELY returned to the City, ignoring the ENTIRE PARTY, and BY HIMSELF sneaked into the bedchambers of the Drow Matriarch, where he attempted to seduce her
>And got a golden chain around his neck for his troubles, sold as a slave in the Underdark
>I just stared at him for a bit as I was told this.

i would if i had any. Every game i've joined has had a terribad DM.

I have stories of shitty stuff happening

Share your pain friend, everyone like to hear a good awful GM story.

Alright, here's the final, worst, story:
Bobby GMing.
THIS was very recent, only a few years back. Our group just finished a badass run of Legacy of the Crystal Shard and we were still in the mood for some kickass cold adventures.
>Bobby volunteered to GM, says he had just such a story for us to play
>With great apprehension, we agree
>All goes well for the first few levels, we're actually only accosted by a flirty barmaid once, and bobby actually did it very well
>Early on in the campaign my Poacher (We were doing a lot of homebrew at this point, I'll tell you guys more about this badass class if you want) comes across a violent mob basically ready to murder the shit out of "The Witch-Girl", some snowy-haired chick in town
>Chaotic Neutral still isn't evil, so I step in and basically threaten to murder their faces off if they don't fuck off, rest of the group shows up after a bit.
>I'm only able to comfort the girl a little bit before she thanks me and runs off
>Flash forward to level 9, we've successfully managed to get ourselves stuck in a blizzard whilst searching for a White Dragon fuck out here in the middle of nowhere
>Fucker is the only one apparently with knowledge on how to end "The Encroaching Frost" which will swallow up the world
>So I get split from the party and find my way to a cabin built into the side of a cliff
>Bobby pulls me aside, tells me that he'll continue the session with me later
>I'm confused but Ok, whatever man

This isn't a story in the traditional sense I keep seeing, but I just finished running a game for my family tonight. We've never played before, I picked up the Curse of Strahd book and we went through most of the Death House mini adventure. I say most of because character creation took a really long time, we had to go through one by one so everyone understood it, but it was a lot of fun. My younger brother is playing an Elf Bard, he uses a lute called Double Bass that we sorta cheated and made it double as a great club. He's a real shit and steals a lot of stuff, dismantled a chandelier for the silver, but turns his nose up at stuff he thinks is lame, even if it's worth more. My sister rolled up a Tiefling Warlock, she liked the idea of being a demon and slinging evil magic. She was less boisterous but she'd do a lot of the inspection and finding secrets. My mum is playing a Dwarf Cleric, and played it like an exaggerated version of herself. She has a high wisdom roll but would belligerently barge into rooms and hit stuff with her hammer, get really mad (not for real). If there was a lock no one could pick she'd kick holes in it until they could bypass. Had no faith in magic either because her spell rolls kept failing, her warhammer destroyed everything though.

I made half the stuff up on the spot, a Vistani wagon that they find on the road with a fat old fortune teller woman inside. It was fun putting on voices, although my throat hurts now. They thought everything was a trap and tried to hide in the woods. My sister tried sneaking but caught her horns on a tree branch and they were all revealed. Reluctantly went along but caught a nice ride and had their fortune read. I had to flip through the book for what each card meant but we managed to get laughs out of it.

There's a lot more but I won't go on and bore people. I loved it though, first time any of us have played an rpg and they loved it. They want to pick it up tomorrow.

Preach soul brother

see all the stories of shitty stuff are shitty too

no fun shitty stories, just shitty stories of miserable gaming experiences that are not spectacular or particularly interesting in any way

>arrive at elven city that doesn't like non-elves
>we get in because an elven noble vouches for us cause we (sort of?) saved her mostly from a fire our cunt bard started (said fire killed atleast 8-12 innocents, started because the bard got caught stealing from a guest at the inn)
>get into the city, go for a nearby tavern and hang out.
>bard immediately tells DM he's going to leave the inn
>DM swaps from group perspective to only following the bard, I ask if my paladin can go check out the local church but DM just says no
>bard runs through the city for no real reason other then to presumably be the focus of the session
>stumbles upon a mob about to burn a witch
>witch has a bag on her head
>immediately the CN murderer bard springs into action to save this poor witch who was totally probably innocent maybe
>says a bunch of stupid shit to the peasants, they are just confused and go about their lynchin'
>bard casts thunderwave
>in the middle of a crowd of like 40+ civs
>literally kills atleast thirty civilians, the DM actually went and rolled saves and calculated damage for each individually
>rescues the witch and runs away
>takes off the bag on the witch's head
>she's an old hag with a crooked nose and warts and witch shit
>she cackles and thanks the bard before turning into a black cat and runs away
>that was our entire second session, took about three hours for all that to happen

oh and that whole incident was never mentioned again, despite their being witnesses at the scene and the bard being one of like five humans in the city

see what I mean? story isn't particularly bad or interesting, it was just a miserable waste of three or so hours. and now I've wasted all our time writing about it

>dm didn't do anything about murdering 40 civs
What the fuck

(Cont.)
>So later that night, the rest of the campaign group calls it quits
>We're actually all surprised because we easily forget Bobby is a really good storyteller
>Anywho, back to my character, who is basically knocking on the door of the only warmth for miles
>The door opens and it's the girl from earlier, who invites me inside
>I'm shocked but alright, I roll with it. It's a nice cabin, cozy, all the stuff you'd expect to find at a weekend retreat, I warm up by the fire while she snuggles up to me
>I'm given food and drink while [bobby] talks about how much she's fallen for me
>I already fear that I've wandered into Bobby's Magical Realm
>She's totally into me, but in a creepy way, keeps insisting that I stay here with her
>"I really should get back to my friends, we have a world to save"
>She's having none of that shit, 'insists' that I stay, then I'm hit with a fucking will save.
>An 18 is a fail, I'm stunned
>Next round, a fucking 22 on another will save is ALSO a fail, and I'm captivated
>What the actual fuck is happening, here?
>Well you see Bobby explains to me that the 'Witch-Girl" I 'saved' back in town was actually a Frostwind Virago.
>What
>The
>Fuck?
If you've never encountered one of these things before, look them up. She's effectively twice my level and has a bunch of fucking skills
>Anyway, my character is held captive and captivated by this chick, and Bobby explains to me that she'll keep me as a prisoner until I'm either rescued or agree to marry her.
>I leave after that, tell the others what fucking went down.
>They also go What. The. Fuck.
>I NEVER attend any session run by Bobby again, I never will.
>Am now completely convinced he lives inside a magical realm
Sorry Corschen, I liked you a lot, but you're a fey's fucktoy now.

>takes off the bag on the witch's head
>she's an old hag with a crooked nose and warts and witch shit
>she cackles and thanks the bard before turning into a black cat and runs away

Admittedly, this is pretty funny.

The lack of repercussions for the bard being a dickhead, definitely isn't funny.

I am legitimately sorry to hear it OP.

Hey what's that from?

I'm the DM. A travelling band of gypsy hobbits told the party that they could pass the Lizard-men tribe on the river (the party was going after a talking giant fish that asked people what was best in life) by singing to them. I didn't actually expect them to do that and had made the rumor up on the fly, but when they arrived, they were outmatched like 5 to 50, and in their despair and determination, well, they all started to sing. The players did. I rolled with it and the Lizardmen were so impressed and a bit confused at the trespassers that they simply let them pass. On the way back they found a lot of stronger people than them trying to bruteforce their way through, suffering a lot of casualties, etc.

It was also that day they stole a boat from rhum smugglers and became a bunch of drunken murderhobos on a boat.

>Sing at them, it's your only hope!
Fun stuff.

I once played as a skeleton who could only communicate with the party with the help of the cleric who knew speak with dead. He had to act as an interpreter, and whenever he couldn't cast the spell I had to simply rattle and clack my teeth in frustration while frantically making gestures.

I had an NPC lead my party into the seemingly abandoned lair of a lolsorandumb wizard(think a combination of Ice King and Hades. He's a pretty tepid dude.)... They fought their way through some silly rooms...

Like one that was just a fireplace with rug, suit of armor holding a sword and a chair, and I made them all animate one after the others just to annoy my players.

I also threw in a room with a moose, because one of them was big on Invader Zim and, admittedly, I loved that gag as a kid. My Goliath Fighter tried taming the Moose and almost got his shit tore up when another character slapped the Moose with mage hand.

Finally, I got them to a room with five levers. They decided to pull them all at once, which activated my evil plan. Also, I'd like to note that my Aaracockra player forgot her could fly and I didn't do a damn thing to remind him.

So a bunch of panels opened up under them and they fell down some slides and ended up separated from each other. I am very proud of these rooms that my fiance and I designed.

One of them involved solving punny riddles, the other was very escape the room, in that they had to find one thing to find another thing and then combine two things and so on and so forth until they started a fire.

My favorite was what seemed to be the Wizard's love room where he'd lock up women he wanted. My Goliath ended up in that room and he had to eat chocolates on the bed and put on makeup and a very tasteful little black dress.

They all eventually made it out of their respective rooms, got to the boss battle, which was actually the Wizard's apprentice, who was an idiot and the Wizard left behind when he 'went out for milk' ten years prior.

It was a really fun battle where he animated their shadows and made a golem form for himself where just the stone around him that made up the room, the bookshelf and his desk turned into an armor.

I had a light novel written out for this whole adventure. It was great.

This is going to sound like typical Veeky Forums shitposting, but everything in that story sounds just awful.
But hey, I wasn't there and maybe it's just how it reads in your post.
As long as your players enjoyed it, that's the important thing.
Did you happen to notice if any of them enjoyed it?
You know, while you were congratulating yourself on how great it was?

The only reason I thought it was great was because of how much they enjoyed it. I'll be the first to admit that I've written some shitty adventures, and I can tell when they aren't having fun because of how much they use their phones or decide to not interact with stuff, but that time they SEEMED to be really enjoying themselves and actually cleared the dungeon 100%.

I left quite a bit out because I don't feel like digging out my journal from that time. It wasn't a particularly lore-heavy adventure, nor was it a heart string pulling one, it just happened to be pure fun, which turned out to be pretty educational for me at the time as a young DM. I started sprinkling in stuff like that during other campaigns and it really paid off.

D&D comics, the Fell's Five run to be more specific. It's set in the official setting they had for 4E.

I blame 3.X to be honest.

Every O/NWoD game I've ran or played in has finished. Same with GURPS.

D&D just seems to attract the wrong kind of roleplayers.

>D&D just seems to attract the wrong kind of roleplayers.
For me it's always been encounter drain. The people who really wanted to be there hanging out with friends were bored by encounters and the people who really should've been just playing a video game with their miserable self were bored by everything else. With 5e combat goes a bit faster but it's still a problem.

Yeah that's a large part of the issue.

I've also found that systems that use classes tend to leave players less involved in their character. They just play X the Wizard instead of X the Wizard who graduated from the Royal Academy of Arcane Studies and is currently finishing his graduates in Conjuration before starting a Doctorates in Thaumaturgy.

With classless systems they actually have to think about their character and their background.

An interesting point, because many of the same players weren't as apathetic to Shadowrun, which is clunky as hell.

It's part of why I've left class based systems behind.

I find that to not be the case. Quite the opposite, really; with a classes system like Vampire or GURPS the bulk of character generation tends to be hunting down the "pluses", the things to make your character better at doing whatever you want to do, with only a thin veneer of roleplay justification, and even then only if the GM asks for it or if it accidentally comes up during gameplay.

Since a class makes a lot of the selections for you it frees up time to come up with a better character, meanwhile.

That's my personal experience, anyway. I'm far more invested in my D&D character than I ever was in either of my Vampire characters.

At the climax of our campaign, I led an army against the demonic invaders main host, since i was the only person with any royal blood.

Character had lost his inheritence and heir-ship after being framed by his siblings, turned to a life of thievery and rogueishness, and had just been cleared and returned to his former status.

Demons outnumbered and outclassed us, and whilst we prepared to do battle, the rest of the party used it as a distraction to get in and do the actual boss fight.

Everybody kind of assumed I was making a noble, glorious last stand with the men, to let the party succeed Frodo style.

>How are you going to fight the demonic host? You're outnumbered and outclassed.
>I'm a thief, lads. A rogue. I have no intention of making this a fair fight.

Put my weakest soldiers in the middle wearing the uniforms and banners of my elite, the demons promptly smashed through them, and my actual hardened veterns circled around the flanks with cavalry support, whilst the rearguard surged forward. Encircled and destroyed them, turned up halfway through the party's bossfight with an escort of 50 knights and the demon-lords head.

tl;dr
>re-enacted the Battle of Cannae in DnD 4e to beat the demonic legions.

I dont' think this is the case, it's possibly more of a relatable thing as shadowrun is "modern day" with cell phones and shit while D&D is fantasy. I say this as I've run Medieval GURPS and fantasy Mutants and Masterminds and those games haven't finished but more modern applications have finished most of the time baring death and moving.

Honestly I think fantasy is played out in table top and how people work. They like it in theory and in a quick paragraph but when they get down to doing shit week after week they disconnect very quickly. In video games you have mechanics and an actual pushing of the game via design and not how much 4 to 6 people want it to go on. More modern stuff on the other hand they don't have to stretch their head on how to do shit with arbitrary rules in fantasy for example.

I had a group that had found out some very important information that would be relivant to the king of the land, but they had important things to do at the location. They joked for a few minutes that this would all be solved with a cellphone or email. The wizard spent a few minutes double checking the message spell cause maybe it could do it, but it couldn't, someone broke open the wizard spell list to see if there was a 1st level spell they could afford to have someone in the nearby town cast to inform the king, and another person debated if there were couriers they could just hire or if that would even be a thing in a fantasy setting.

Fantasy games require a really particular mind set and in the old days this worked as people on average didn't have a lot of access to alternatives and would sit down to learn this. Now every time the game has a hiccup that modern devices and thinking can solve they have to go through the motions of figuring out the "correct" way in a fantasy setting to do it. Even if it's small delays it's time where they aren't getting shit done and get to think "Would playing a video game be more fun".

The fact that a class based system generally has plenty of places in setting for you to come from and have your set of skills helps you get invested in your character.

If the class bassed game lets you mingle magic and swordplay, there are already people in setting your character could have learned from.

Classesless systems are just class based systems mechanics portioned out in buy able chunks. This just leads to people being stupid and not taking all the obvious "same class" components and just an ala cart that they think makes a workable character but doesn't even make a jack of all trades that can pass basic tests. While I agree there is choice here and there it boils down to minor detriment so you can have a fluffy addition that no one ever cares. Great example is shadowrun it's a class based system and they try and make that as clear as possible in the archetypes and straying to far from those ideas means you're just the second tier of whoever is in the group thats that or if you are the best of that skill set they'll avoid using that skillset cause it'll get a TPK.

Another one here

>Party are planning a raid on a cult hideout that looks like a normal building in the city.
>Playing as a 7 foot human fighter in full plate called Krohn.
>Not very intelligent, but heart of gold, convinced he's a paladin and spends all of his share of the gold on training healers, building schools, and improving local infrastructure.
>Group plan out intricate raid plan involving stealth, co-ordinated take-downs, breaking and entering and magic.
>Group are poised to enact their plan.
>"Wait, did we tell Krohn about the plan?"
>They did not.
>Krohn kicks the door in and announces that everybody is under arrest.
>Ends up fighting the entire cult.
>Party facepalms as they rush to his aid.

The group laughingly let me away with that because, in complete honesty, its exactly what Krohn would do.

Never had that issue in WoD. If anything, that's what every single 3.PF game has been about. Nothing but collecting feats and +1's for that combat maneuver or trick they've decided to focus on.

This happens a lot with my younger players, but usually within a game or two they wise up and start to actually read about the history of the setting.

But again it mostly only happened in D&D. They were so focused on finding some class feature that would explicitly let them do X they never bother trying to figure out how they would normally do it. Switch over to GURPS medieval and they've got no problem thinking outside the boxes the rules define for them.

A lot of this might boil down to players being a bit more timid regarding the unknown.

>an Orc Barb, a Halfling Sorc, a Dwarf Paladin and a elf Cleric
>fall into desert cave
>explore a bit, do some encounters
>3 rooms in, see an ominous switch in the middle of a room
>Halfling uses mage hand on switch
>door to the room slams shut with party outside, and they all hear a gurgling sound
>Orc takes out battering ram, starts going at the door before anyone can stop him
>door cracks, black goo starts spurting out
>well fuck
>retreat back up the stairs before the door bursts open and black goo flows into the hall and up after the party
>second to last room, all the ruckus downstairs has shaken a hidden door loose
>Halfling peeks in, sees a chest and a skeleton, but says fuck it because the goo is gaining
>Orc hears "chest" and heel turns back to room, throws open the chest
>its a mimic
>Dwarf runs back to help Orc, Halfling watches from the hallway, goo now up to knees
>elf said fuck y'all and is still running for the exit, hits a trap, gets a javelin to the back, incapacitated
>Orc trying to drag mimic to the exit with the Dwarf failing his strength checks to aid another, basically just riding the Orcs legs as he slowly drags the mimic behind
>Halfling sees the mimic, Orc gives him a nod, Halfling casts Scorching Ray on the Mimic
>black goo was tar
>Dwarf is on fire
>Halfling is on fire
>Mimic is on fire
>Orc is really on fire
>the blast throws the Halfling clear into the next room where he waits for the others
>Mimic lets go of Orc, Orc sprints out of the dungeon, hitting the same pressure plate as the elf, setting off another javelin into the back of elf who just stood back up
>Halfling casts frost ray on himself and Dwarf to put them out, chases the Orc down the hall to put him out
>elf gets back up
>finally get to the entrance, a steep sandy slide
>nobody can get up it
>end up having to wait for the tar to reach the party and swim in it until to reached high enough to scramble up the slide

Didn't get a single copper out of the whole debacle.

Jesus Christ.

I have a good one for you lads, a tale of the great tapestry heist
>be me and three other guys in a town
>we're there to start the quest the DM laid out for us
>it involved taking out a group of lizard people trying to summon some demon lord
>fuck that, we gotta scam these bitch-ass townsfolk
>when i say scam i mean scam, as in rigging games, cheating in cards, shit like that
>me and my little brother start scamming shit hard
>DM tells us our scams aren't going to work, various reasons why not, w/e
>my little brother isn't a shitty player but he wanted to at least once, steal one thing, even if it's shitty and doesn't matter
>he says to the DM "i want to steal a tapestry, where is the closest one?"
>there's one at the church
>got it
>we head to the church, get inside have a look around
>theres a tapestry on the wall
>fifty fucking feet long, hanging sideways
>bro still wants to steal it
>hes a teifling rogue, great in sneak and acrobatics
>im playing a half-orc with high strength and a sack of magic beans
>both of us are piss-fucking shit-faced, spent the past day at the local pub
>i stumble over to the priest as my brother clumsily starts sneaking around the pews
>i start hassling the priest about joining the church to distract him
>bro climbing up the pillars
>one of the other players was getting pretty god damn annoyed with us, the other one is totally on board but not near us
>im running out of shit to say, start drunkenly spitting out orcish drinking songs
by this point my brother has made it to the tapestry
>time to make the sneak roll to cut down this bad boy
>he wants to cut one side then swing from it like Errol Flynn
>wow this is not going to work
>my guy is sweating fucking bullets
>running out of drinking songs too
>ask to make a donation to the church
>priest is like, "sure, if you'll leave after"
>bro messes up the sneak roll to cut the thing down
>massive rip, so fucking loud
(Cont?)

So, first time DM, got some fresh shit
>party of REAL close friends
>total noobs, but willing
>youngest decides to try mage
>goes for elementalist, wields a chain and the power of thunder
However
>rolls a -2 in charisma
>wanted to be a power crazed researcher trying to attain godhood
>rolls with it and plays the loner
Plot happens, he finds an ancient tome
It appears to trigger old magic, opens a "goddamn hole" in the middle of a plaza
>gets seized by a group of rangers before the city guards find him
>he tries to intimidate
>fails
>tries diplomacy
>fails
>goes super invested and starts to truly behave autistically
>party's paladin knocks him out with one punch as he attempts to cast lightning in a tight room with a dozen people
Hope this run goes well...
We are so invested
>on the opposite side the generico_warrior.PNG rolled a good char
>he is illiterate though
It was genuinely charming to see them help each other out

Here's how the city guards got to know of "that one wierd elf"
>first session
>party sleeping in a tavern
>one player is late to the ordeal, so i slapped in his dwarven clan as NPC
>dwarves start drinking
>like really heavily
>spend night mocking the shy warrior and harassing "the nun" (female not!paladin)
>the autistic mage is sitting in a corner table, reading shit and preparing spells
>bartender gets fed up with the dwarvess bickering and summons the guard
>they force the dwarves out, but they get fiesty and are arrested
>mage standing in the middle of the stairs, watching amused
Town was having some problems with an alleged niggermancer
>guard asks him about his studies
>he replies "mind your own business" and slams the door to his room
In the dead of the night
>someone fails a stealth check
>half the party awake
>autistic mage is paranoid
>as they brak into his room he jumps off the window, in pajamas
>no damages, since he's an elementalyst
>pretends to run away and throws himself in the hay of the tavern
>rolls an unnatural 20 in stealth check
>the warrior rushes outside, the paladin tries to fix the door
>4th player gets home and starts playing
>dwarf is woken up by the mess
And this is how my party met
>warrior is the pennyles son of a whore, born and raised in a mercenary company
>paladin is a young dark elven lady that wanted to join said guard
>dwarf went to sleep early only to find his clan disappeared
>mage is half naked in hay

Dnd 5e because easy.
Minecraft flat world because "your 0riginal settings are too dark and depressing"
Okay bitches here you go.
Players are "npcs" on a minecraft creative server. Actual players are considered gods. But server probably become unpopular so no active gods anymore. Maybe they all dead.
In the center "Firstborn gods" land. Giant pikachu, ponies, megaman 2d sculptures. Jungle stuff. Spawning point. Farther away is regular are with cities, dungeons, black obsidia swastikas, lava dicks, tnt traps. On the edge of the world modders town - weird magical terrain, portals to my magical realm, living technogods producing stuff blindly. No players at all.
Players travel through this land looking for adventure. Its starts like generic thing. Castle attacked by spiders. Artist need red flowers for paint. Then it gets weirder. Ghost a following party allways keep two blocks below. Creeper inside password protected prison. He ask to free him, and then party failed he destroyed himself with the prison to die free. Mad engineer building railroad to the end of the world to break the game from inside and summon gods. Players entering badlands beyond the edge of world generation to summon gods back.
Server spiting out java errors and shutting down. Admin-god probably notice this and load it back. If he is alive.

What the fuck did I just read.

Is this what autism feels like?

No its lack of sleep. I probably should go now and post more formated and accurate set of stories tommorow. Sorry.

Good night.

hey now, Shadowrun's great. As long as you're willing to have a few glaring flaws, you can totally have a sort of jack of all trades character.
-t, Adept Face Stealth Tank Animal Wrangler

(cont'd)
reading back, i seem like a real dick for fuckin with he DM's campaign, but he was kinda boring anyway
>the priest looks up at my bro, sees his dumb sweaty ass hanging thirty feet up, tearing apart the church's tapestry.
>nice, kiddo
>priest raises his hand, bro is immediately paralyzed
>falls to the ground, bad hit
>i jam a magic bean into the nearest pot of dirt, massive magic tree sprouts from it
>six-ish fruits are hanging from the tree
>i see the priest dragging my bro towards the door
>i jam a fruit in my mouth, start breathing fire
>blow flame at the church's door to stop this guy from having my idiot brother arrested
>the priest hesitates for a second
>raises his hand again
>blows the doors off their hinges
>i decide it's time to bounce
>i sprint towards the priest, breathing fire uncontrollably all over the church
>forgot those were made of wood, now the church is on fire
>sprint past the priest, grabbing my bro on the way out
>as soon as i clear the doorway, i toss a tree token behind me to block the priests path
>massive ass oak sprouts in the doorway
>make it out of there without being arrested
looking back now, we were massive dicks to both our party and our DM, but god damn man, we were bored. one of the guys i was playing with spent forty solid minutes asking the mayor of the town about inane shit while we sat around with our thumbs up our asses waiting for him.

oh, a little side thing about that story
>one of my party, a gnome raised by pigs
>joins the church like, 10 minutes before me and my bro go in
>as we're fleeing the town, we stop to camp
>he has a message from above come to him
>he pissed off his god by us burning down his church
>turns out it was the sun god, the king of all the gods
>curses my friend with eternal bad luck
>the guy joins the church, and on the same day commits blasphemy against it, all against his control
>he was not happy about that at all
>easily my brother's favorite d&d memory
good times, good times