/eldar/

damn captcha ate my pic

I'm definitely looking forward to War in the Webway if that turns out to be true. Sounds wonderful in fluff AND has what sound like great models, let's hope good rules too.

Inviting the opinion of these degenerates was clearly a mistake, but at least I see now where we stand. It was right to leave you to rot. Nonetheless, surely someone remembers beneath the black suns, and knows reason. Or, at the very least, self-preservation.

>We will grudgingly accept suggestions from any of our lost kin also
>lost kin

Craftworld babbies go home, the Eldar of Commorragh have always been the true successors to the Eldar Empire.

Cegorach is the only answer and you know it. The Black Library contains the secrets we need to defeat chaos.

Very well - then where is your empire, dark one? Your one city where you hide?

Okay, this may be a stretch, but hear me out on this.

What if, we landed craft world in Exodite worlds, cannibalized the Webway gates, steal some of the trash in Golden Boy's basement, and just move all the planets and Elder Empire into a pocket space in the Webway?

Screw the Prime Material for now, there's nothing there for us now anyway. Let's rebuild the empire in peace and comfort then, once all the Mon'Keigh, Orks, and all the other degenerates have torn themselves to death, then we can move in, refreshed and renewed, and take the place back.
If we want to anyway.

Either that, or invest in more dinosaurs

Leave us to rot? Those are some funny words from our cadaverlike brethern, live for the moment or continue to die in your pathetic, squalid existence you call "life"

this pic reminds me of a bad salvia trip

maybe you should all just kill yourselves and save us the trouble

Oh good to see you mon'keigh, we've been needing to restock on our desserts.

Exodite here.
You Delds and Crafters need to stop getting in pissing contests all the time.

Seriously, Y'all are more ornery that two stegosaurs crammed in a boot

Well, they do seem to do a better job at it than you all

>sir, eldar spotted! what now?
>Scratch their ears. With powerfists

You seek to mock your former kin for seeing beyond the pain and pleasure of the moment? Pursuing nothing more than your cheap thrills, you have lost all that was great. You are nothing but blind, ignorant children, turning your back on the gifts of Asuryan. Forever hiding in the shadows of your squalid port-city, drugs clouding your eyes, while we rule the stars. That is how you rot.

Why is that the only picture I can find of you guys?

Eldar helmet wings look a lot like Khornate helmet wings.

Your grandiose delusions may fool the fellow husks you call our bretheren but you lose sight of the moment! We are but a fleeting moment in infinity, might as well enjoy the ride!

I have literally never seen a country bumpkin army but I would like to

...

Y'all are faggots. I'm taking my Craftworld with me and getting out of here.
Maybe I'll tell an ork waaagh! that you guys are requesting combat in this location in my way, could hardly hurt the galactic IQ levels to lose this gathering of minds.

We are NOT a fleeting moment in infinity, but the eternal, the chosen of the gods, the greatest of all empires, fool! At least, if it weren't for you... You have lost sight of that, and that is precisely where you are rotten!

Nonetheless, war is coming to the Webway. We shall maybe need our fallen cousins, who at least, once were Eldar.

While the lesser races squabble over the carcass of the galaxy, we true heirs to the stars continue to spill forth from slumber and reclaim what was lost. Cocaine, psychic shenanigans, and dinosaurs could never stand against the sheer might of the Necrons!

In a book written by a human author most likely.

+You are WEAK Xenos scum. You die now because your forefathers were cowards who when offered power by Slaanesh refused it, damning their bloodlines for eternity.+

+You fail because unlike mankind you are weak, you lack the conviction, the drive for survival to suspend all morality in pursuit of absolute dominion. When offered power by Chaos itself you should capitalize on this offer, and seize more. And more. You must ENSLAVE Chaos, to bend it to your very will and bring it to your very knees. The universe exists to be enslaved, and you will continue to fail and die until you accept this fact, and the power the Chaos Gods offer you!+

do the chaos gods offer power greater than scatter laser jetbike troops?

It's going to be a book written by the empra, ultramarines or maybe Draigo. After reading it the foolish Eldar Xenos will be able to defeat chaos but they never do because nobody ever does anything. But they will come to respect the wisdom of the space marines and their spiritual liege and this will be made amply clear in many books where the marines defeat eldar.

+Do you want INFINITE legions of endlessly spawning daemonic hordes that can only be stopped by closing warp portals, or daemonically possessed titans? Imagine just what we could accomplish by violating one of your precious Revenant titans and fusing it with the soul of a Keeper of Secrets+

+Just imagine it Xenos, UNLIMITED POWER+

I don't know. Still seems like a waste of points compared to jetbikes, scatter lasers and a wraithknight

i tinks pointy eldar gitz 'eads looks reel gud on me pointy stik

ahaghahahaha 2 right chump

Your focus is somewhat lacking. Before restoring an empire, we need to restore ourselves. The human imperium is a fleeting empire that blossomed in the void our fall left, and they themselves barely hang on. Let them do so, we have plenty of enemies they can spend themselves fighting. The orks are the same, except for having even less organization. The Necrons, Tyrannids and the minions of the Great Enemy are much more dangerous foes.

However, to defeat anyone, we must first strengthen ourselves. No matter how great our warriors and how wise our seers, to go with a hundred against one million is to be a step removed from oblivion. We have reached a point where idea of the once-kin to breed more of themselves is worth considering. Many of us follow the paths of Khaine, but perhaps we should be just as zealous in following in Isha's footsteps. Those born and raised today will be the artisans, mariners and warriors of tomorrow.

That's absurd, the Dark Eldar could only ever be considered inheritors to those pathetic last few millenia of the Empire where brother murdered brother and our people ate corpses in the streets just to survive. A pathetic and meaningless title to bear and nothing at all to be proud of.

Exodites follow a somewhat primitive version of the true ages of glory for the Eldar Empire where constant work and effort to improve life for all gave each individual true purpose and a sense of belonging. Cratfworlders follow a similar path but one that needed to alter itself to best combat the forces of Chaos that now plague us. We will be the rejuvinators and inheritors to a new and better Empire.

I want that abhorrent shield Mon'keigh My brother's soulstone is on that shield

Stage performance in Biel-Tan this night, who's coming? I heard these guys are good.

>Slan is trying to eat your souls
>So you decide to train your minds and bodies
>Instead of training your souls until you can kick that faggot gods ass

Do you even soul power?

Why don't we just... you know, fuck 'em?

Don't roll your eyes, I'm being serious here. A viable genetic half-breed or less may not be an "Eldar" or more, but it probably won't go straight to that THING either if it dies, and it'll be a whole lot less dangerous than most humans with scarypowers. And if we create a few systems worth of the things we're still waving our genetically-superior dicks in the Imperium's collective face while also solving the problem of our dwindling population.

So I repeat: why not just fuck 'em?

Because it's biologically impossible to.

>Half_Eldar_Ultramarine.png

we don't we use Subterfuge and the mon'keigh's own political system against them instead of facing them in the open field?

Stop shoving your shitty fetishes into this discussion, it doesn't work anyway.

Who cares about being masters of the galaxy, seriously. On the one hand y'all weird fuckers need to put on some clothes, do less drugs and start working.
And you up there, I get the nomad lifestyle but your flying cemeteries are weird.
Why the whole galaxy? I just want my cabbage patch to be secure, surely mon-keighs aren't that bad, right? I mean, we can always make a deal and have them on one end and us on another, right?

One city? One city!? the Main hub of Commoragh is twice the size of a craftworld, and links to thousands of subrealms where we hold dominance. Enemies only enter at our pleasure. That is our empire, an impregnable kingdom, that cannot be approached unless we wish it, while striking freely at anything.

Gentlemen, I have an idea. What if we make some genetically engineer super soldier badasses in power armor that are able to take on threats far stronger than the normal Eldar can handle.

I call them the Space Soldiers.

If I were human I would use the fabled green arrow to indicate you are implying the Eldar aren't the pinnacle of existence.

Clearly that's not true since the Commorarghites keep making better versions of us.

Don't the dark eldar already do that? Minus the power armor. Besides power armor is clunky and slow, I can't do sick backflips in power armor.

Indeed. What is a threat the Eldar cannot handle? Sounds like mon-keigh bawling.

...well, it's not the stupidest suggestion today.

I still think the orks are our best bet. They were directed by superior beings into war before, they could be again. It's just a matter of finding the right method of control. Or at the very least telling them that there's a.. I dont know, tasty ork treat in the centre of the eye of terror and letting them loose.

Clearly you've never worn Commorarghite power armor. It feels like you're wearing the finest silks while covered in barb wire. It's wonderfully nice once the screaming goes away.

Don't the perverts just wear metal plates hung on their skin with hooks? I guess the power part might be if you're energized by that somehow.

So, I take it we still don't have any good ideas of how to get rid of the main problem? You know, the BIG one. No? Anyone?

Mass suicide to empower a dead warp spirit is not a good idea. We'd be dead.

Eldar family reunions are the worst.

Those scary clown guys fight chaos all the damn time. Why not ask them? They hold the secrets of the Black Library.

Have you ever actually tried having a normal conversation with a Harlequin

You confuse improvement with degeneration, like a human in the midst 21st century-current year politics.

Harlequins are fine, but don't you dare to even look in the direction of these guys.

We would be alive, with Ynnead and Cegorach, the prince of pleasure dead, the primitive races at our feet once more. As has been prophesied. What are we without faith? Look at the commorrites.

We shoudl try, all their actions seem pretty reasonable.

This is nothing but a plot made by a subsect of pre-Asturmen worshippers who are infiltrating all craftworlds and are trying to sway us untill we destroy our own cultures. They will even start pushing for breeding with humans soon, I tell you, and to extend a friendly hand to the human hordes who seek to invade our homelands and try to destroy our culture and civilization.
We must stay strong.
We must built a wall.

MAKE THE ELDAR GREAT AGAIN

Make Iyanden great again?

It's very simple... REMOVE MONKEIGH. We've been saying this for millennia, but everytime we wipe out a vile Ork WAAAGH!, foolish marine chapter or tainted IG regiment all you dipshits ever have to offer is asspain about how we should be fighting Chaos.

WELL EXCUSE ME FUCKNUGGET, but why do you think Chaos is so powerful? Where do you think Chaos got those god damn Chaos Space Marines? The FUCKING monkeigh. Those fuckwits feed Chaos armies of soldiers and oceans of emotions every god damn day. Be they greenskin or Tau or human or abhuman, monkeigh gonna monkeigh. Khorne is Orkish in appearance for a god damn reason.

So can we stop shedding tears for the poor misguided little monkeigh and just fucking end them already? Without them Chaos will be an emaciated child. You'll be able to walk up to Tzeentch and wipe your balls across his 9 faces.

>Invite Nigger-kin to discussion
>They just shitpost about their edgy rebel lifestyle and angsty teen poetry

We're on the verge of engineering a God of death while you plebs can't even fix a gate. Remind me again why we asked for their opinion when they can't even grasp city planning? These are the idiots too stupid to grasp that their entire way of life is built around making their greatest enemy stronger.

Guys.

Guys, hear us out.

Just.

What if.

What if, right?

What if...you jailbroke all of my missing pieces being held by the uppity Necrontyr so that I can reform? If we just let bygones be bygones (and c'mon, what's one buffet over the course of milennia?), with our powers combined we could wipe the Materium clean! I can surely sate myself on the bug and monkeigh infestations you have, and you guys can uh...go breed like crazy or whatever it is you do when you're not being delicious I guess?

Pic related, it's (one 10,000th of) me and my soon-to-be bitch.

>I heard these guys are good.

No critic in Eldar society has the guts to give Harlequins a bad review.

To be fair I found the part where Slaanesh got custward poured down its' pants while being hit in the face and groin by pies and falling down onto a whoopie cushion HILARIOUS.

I swear, if those Solitaires channel the impotent rage at having to do performances like that it explains a lot about how they're the most feared of the feared.

>Mass suicide

God fucking damnit if you don't understand the plan don't contribute. Did everyone not get the memo Iyanna and Sylandri sent out about the whole rebirth part with the revived gods and shit? We only need the infinity circuits to get super charged with the dragonb - I mean Tears of Morai Hegg and then we can get with the whole killing Slaanesh thing.

No but Vect is. Unless you want a Castigator to shove a dark lance up your asshole, pipe down.

Bonesinger here, I don't keep up with current affairs in between humming up more wargear so uh.

Slaanesh was merely born from the extinction of most of our species, right? And has been glutting itself on more mortal souls ever since?

And great Ynnead is being fueled by the souls of...the handful of Craftworlds that survived Slaanesh's birth?

How, exactly, are we planning to build up our god of death into anything remotely threatening to Slaanesh, let alone the other chaos gods, in any reasonable amount of time?

Because in all the galaxy, out of every legend I have ever read, I have only heard of one Mon'keigh folk hero who overcame such adversity against the odds. AND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA

Yeah, about that. I'm pretty sure the Mon'keigh tried that a while ago.

And where is their "God" "Emperor" now?

Flatlining on a broken glorified toilet, that's where.

It'll take the effort and time of many Farseers but it has been theorized that the Hivemind of the Tyranids could be shackled to or at the very least be directed by our psychic powers. All it would take is a great enough Psychic host to withstand the initial aggression of the Hivemind before we take control of the multitude of simple minds within it one by one until we control them all.

>wants to destroy the Imperium
>doesn't realize that the Emperor dying would result in reality being devoured by Chaos

It's possible we already tried that with Khaine. He went on countless murdering spree against our people and became the reason the Gods stopped being able to talk to us

Are you saying we should just take all of our homeworlds and push them somewhere else?

That sounds like a great idea...

TO GET US ALL KILLED!

>Invite your emo cousins to a serious family discussion 'cause at least they're cousins and not inbred fat mon'keigh
>they don't even have jobs they just sit around jacking off in the dark all day
>all they talk about is atheism, how doing drugs is cool and their trash music

It really is a little embarrassing.

Slaanesh' excess has weakened him, yes he fed to the point that he could take on Khorne but he then had to build his foothold within the warp and build his host of Daemons which took a lot out of him. Besides a soul taken is different from a soul freely given. Now if we all focused on strengthening Ynnead willingly and Cegorach pulled some trick to weaken Slaanesh further it is possible that The Death God could take her down.

The mon'keigh have these cute delusions about their importance in the universe. A bunch of monkeys that came down from trees a while ago now have an emperor. It might be adorable if they weren't dirty monkeys.

WOT?! Da boyz would neva' be fightin' for da spiky boyz. We fight for Gork and Mork, not for dat lazy Khorne git and dat cunnin' Nurgle fattie.
And while many of dose humie go in a scrap for dose chaos crazies, it was YOU panzee grots whose made dat Slaanesh Warboss and now dey want prove as da biggest, baddest panzee by krumpin' da lots of ya.
At dis point, if ya lots of runst manage to made what yer call a WAAAGH! with dat Ynnead Boss, it get itself stomped so 'ard that even da snotling will say "hah, what a loser" because yer Big Boss Khaine always get stomped by 'umies every time ya wake 'im up.

But it is blatantly the case. We as a species may be far more superior on average to a human but the Mon'keigh Emperor is an astonishingly powerful Psyker and leader and has placed himself as a cornerstone for all reality. To remove him now as Chaos rages in the wake of the humans terrible 10,000 year war would be to allow Chaos to lash out of the Eye of Terror to devour the entire galaxy.

>When Eldrad Ulthran brought warning to Iyanden of the Great Devourer he also told the Iyanden Seer Council that the Eldar races only ultimate hope against Slaanesh lay with Ynnead, the God of Death.

>While most of Iyanden’s dismissed Ulthran, Arienal embraced this prophecy and in a brief moment recieved a glorious apotheosis where the spirits of living Eldar would become one with the dead. The resulting psychic backlash would stir Ynnead from his slumber, and at least defeat Slaanesh

>Now long awaited portents have come to pass, and the bands of light around the book have flicked and died, and within the pages are recorded Cegorach’s final jest, a way to trick Slaanesh into expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.

Well... except that one time...

>Was attending a performance depicting the 6530th verse of the Asuryata; the defence of Stormvauld by Maugan Ra and his single handed victory over the Tyranids
>Was going pretty well until it got to the big second act battle scene
>Halfway through the bit someone in the audience screams "BOLLOCKS"
>Everyone gasps and the play comes to an immediate hault
>Harlequin troupe leader immediately asks who dares interrupt their performance
>Massive figure gets out of his throne at the back
>It's Maugan Ra
>And he's been drinking all day
>Drinking all day for 3 centuries
>Apparently he was displeased about how the Death Jester playing his role failed to re-enact the fact he had been busting out a sick air guitar solo on his Maugetar while sliding down the back of a dying Trigon
>'L-lord Ra, p-please forgive us. We meant no...'
>Before he can finish, Maugan Ra jumps up on stage
>Gets the Death Jester in a headlock and starts playing his skull like a bongo
>'NOW FOR SOME REAL ENTERTAINMENT' he slurred
>The entire troupe tried to remove his grip from the wheezing jester
>He couldn't be budged
>This 'performance' went on for six cycles

The troupe never came back to Altansar

Really? Oh. I thought he went on killing sprees before Khorne super slammed Slaanesh with him into pieces. Always seemed like a bit of a jerk, if you ask me. Wasteful to leave all that meat to spoi-I MEAN, slaughter his own faithful worshippers! Yes! Yes, that!

Oh well. Don't be a stranger, you hear? I'll just be over here incinerating some of our mutual enemies while looking for the rest of myself, so gimme a psychic shout if your death god plan doesn't pan out!

Oh right, and while we're on the same page re: taking those disgustingly non-material fuckghosts to the cleaners?

You guys might wanna check out the Cadian Pylons sometime. Silly mon'keigh can't make heads of tales of my buddy the Void Dragon's craftsmanship, but I'm sure you'll figure something out.

I'll be honest, I only skimmed it. It's a hell of a risk if it doesn't work, to put it mildly.

Finding a way to skip this galaxy seems like the right idea so far. Just a couple millenia with actual peace and things wouldn't look so bleak.
Though running into a tyranid infested galaxy trying to escape this one doesn't sound much better.

It's not a numbers thing my good engineer. It's a metaphysical thing. Slaanesh is a being of excess. Ynead is a being of death - pure nothingness. The best counter to excess? Fucking DEATH kiddo. Try tickling your prostate with a blade when you're 6 foot underground Slaany.

...you know, the Mon'keigh were instrumental in allowing daemonkind a foothold in reality, right?

Maybe that C'tan over there has a point-its' consumption of their race would leave no soul behind, after all. Whether we skip the galaxy or clean it up, as long as those primitives keep waving their psychic beacons around Chaos will be ever on the rise.

>Monkeigh claim Emperor dying results in collapse of the entire materium somehow
>Monkeigh also claim it would result in his rebirth somehow
>Implying monkeigh are reliable authorities on anything; even their own shit

Didn't they say he'd be reborn as a new Chaos God or something? Setting aside what a fundamental misunderstanding of the gods' nature that is, it's just the perfect illustration of their hubris despite having objectively done worse damage to the galaxy than all the races they spit on.

I see no reality where a mon'keigh is a cornerstone of anything. The only reason why a mon'keigh might be so powerful is because other mon'keigh reflect their crude feelings on the spirit realm to empower one mon'keigh, while also feeding the dark gods as they are wont. No, the galaxy was fine before the mon'keigh, and it will be good again when they are gone.

>Orks value nothing except having dakka, having choppy and being green
>Outclassed at all these things by Striking Scorpions

Consider suicide. Actually, come to think of it you pretty much do that every time you pick a fight.

Not to mention you'd have to go slower then light to get there since Warp travel doesn't work on the edges of the Galaxy and the Webway doesn't go outside the confines of the Milky Way. Even with the most advanced technology the Necrons ever produced it still took the Silent Kind millions of years just to give a few of the nearest Galaxies a cursory inspection. And most had been eaten by Tyranids.