What would happen if you put a book inside?

What would happen if you put a book inside?

How would you use/abuse the cupboard?

It's basically a cupboard of animate object right? I'd probably just sell weird living shit on the internet

shove a noise marine in there. and teach it how to make music.
get creed to play Strategy games with you.
get a functioning miniature army of your choice.
(though humans are a better bet for your safety)
have Anything living.
heck. try to fit a Hot glue-able figure in there and away you go.

Flesh light, we never need a women again

I would make a figurine of my original character, Absolutely-Omnipotent-And-Totally-Loyal-To-Me-Man!
Seriously, this is never addressed in stories about a power to make images of characters come to life, such as the rat talisman in Jackie Chan Adventures. The character has all the abilities that the user imagines they have, so theoretically the user can imagine an original character with arbitrary abilities on the spot. Or if it must be an established character, how many people must have heard of the character for it to work?
And what about a character's knowledge? If I conceive of a fictional character who knows the cure for cancer, and I make them real, and they explain the cure to the world's top medical scientists, will it actually be an effective cure, just because the character is defined as knowing it?

This sounds like it could be a crime. I'm not sure how exactly, but it could.

You're pretty on point user, it really depends on the limits of the cupboard. I haven't read the book/seen the movie in over a decade, I'd assume it has a limit, everything has a limit. Maybe it can bring things to life, and is described or advertised as limitless, but that might exaggerated. A superpowered or magical being might just appear to be magical/superpowered/etc.

The point about cancer is very good, I'd create a character that knows how to build more cupboards, larger ones too. Then there's always space travel, bio engineering, posthumanism, cyborgs, terraforming, energy, and I suppose we could always use a way to deal with garbage that won't decompose.

Then again can it create life that knows how to do these things.

Oh shit, if you had a larger cupboard you could create a copy of yourself that is immortal and has your memories, which is practically immortality, assuming you have no problems with the idea of duplicating yourself. I think some people worry the duplicates aren't 'really alive' or that they don't have a soul.

What if I animate a figurine of Jesus (the pop-culture version with distinctly European features) and ask him to clarify details of the Bible that different denominations interpret differently? How does the cupboard decide what the "real" Jesus would say? Does it go by the beliefs of the person who used the cupboard, or the person who made the figurine, or the most popular interpretation, or what?
>hurr there is a real Jesus durr
You know what I mean. For the sake of argument, pretend I said some other deity who certainly didn't write their own holy book.

>What would happen if you put a book inside?

I'd say they'd effectively suffer from Buzz Light-year syndrome.
They believe everything about their established background, and have theoretical "knowledge" about it. But that "knowledge" might be false, as it will be ultimately limited by the creator's own knowledge. That way if you create a super smart doctor action figure, but his knowledge will be limited by his creator's. So it's possible he could actually have all his facts straight, but it's also possible he ends up knowing fake medicine that just sounds legit.
Similarly, any of his abilities are limited by the physics of this world as well and by how his creator can explain them to work.

So if you make your character that knows the cure for cancer, but you don't know shit about science. He will effectively wind up as some character that spews bullshit that just sounds scientific. But they will totally believe that they know the cure for cancer and in their fictional world in which you conceived them, perhaps that is the cure. But bringing him into reality, that cure may not translate.

>Hot glue-able figure in there and away you go
That is both hot and horrifying at the same time: torn from your world to be a fat giant's cum dumpster.

...

Obviously the least cruel thing to do is animate some character with a bukkake fetish.

What would happen if you put monopoly money in there?

Sex objects. Living dildoes, living onaholes, see what size of fuck doll fits inside, experiment with shit like taking those posable figures and switching bits at the joints, become an accomplished sculptor and make my own shit for funsies, sell most of that shit but keep my favorites. Maybe get He-Man and Skeletor and hand them steak knives for friday night knife-fights and make a few bucks.

What if you animated one of those mouth ones? Would it speak?

I keep imagining it screaming DICKS non-stop.

Ideally with a Bukkake, slavedom and miniaturization fetish.

>I keep imagining it screaming DICKS non-stop.

I just imaging it constantly screams.

But with no lungs, no sound comes out.

And the rotting would start pretty quick, with no way to pump blood around it.

by that logic the indian would have just dropped dead because the human heart and brain can't be miniaturized to that extent and still function

The cupboard seems to make shit like that just "work" you'd have a mouth shaped onahole screaming away. If you cut it it would bleed and if you don't stop fucking it every so often it will suffocate and die. It might even have a tongue and teeth coming out.

>Hmm gotta think of something awesome that would fling the human race into a new golden age.
>Better skim through the thread first.
>................
>Now all i can think of is filth

You could maybe make laser guns from the 90's and lightsaber toys work or maybe toy flying ships and UFO's and then dissect and study the piss out of them.
Shove in plastic replica's of organs and suddenly the organ shortage is alleviated by how fast you can replicate.
I still think marital aid's are the best bet and most lucrative.

>All these people want weird sex stuff/ultimate cosmic power

>I just want a living chess set

A bit different. The Indian toy had a past and memories and a personality.

Pokemon and pokeballs, make yourself an army of loyal superpets. If they lack the powers, sell them as pets for the super rich.

...

Man, you can't imagine how often I thought about this as a kid.

Anyway, I would probably put a bunch of plastic gold coins. As far as I can tell, it will turn them real, not alive.

Wow that came out shittier than i thought it would. Guess thats what i get from using a free phone app cause my poor laptop is temporarily dead.

I read that in The Monarch's voice and it is hillarious

I swear its that fucking goatee.

Forget coins. Buy a log and gold paint, cut into bullion sized pieces and paint away.

This shit right here. It tries to make things real. Shove a plastic toy of a cowboy in? What pops out is a miniature walking talking cowboy stereotype who believes he was/is real and has memories that (are possibly fake) he believe are real. Shove in a gundam? You got a miniature mech rolling around which might or might not be sentient and probably won't have a pilot unless that was included with the model. I don't honestly don't want to know what would happen if you shoved one of those barbie sized fuckable dolls into it.

"Feed me!"

Barbie sized and fuckable seems like antonyms.

The magic was in the key, so I'm going to assume I have that.
>use it on someone's front door
>leave everyone inside in a plastic-like death state
>go inside and rob them blind
>turn them back to normal and GTFO
>they'll be distracted from the missing stuff by the fact that they had suddenly become various inanimate objects from the past
>possibly also take lewd photos of any cute girls who are there

>miniature functional lightsaber

You'd be a billionaire overnight from the medical applications alone.

>miniature
Hell, you could probably fit the hilt of a full sized one and make it work.

Guys, you do realize the power is in the key and it has some very clear limitations.

Namely, when you bring something to life you're not actually getting a movie character, you're getting a close-approximation of the movie character as portrayed by the actor.

This has the added problem of ripping a person out of their timeline and putting them into a coma-like state. The Indian and Cowboy were real people, and every time the boy would call on them they in the past would just slump over.

Would this fit inside?

That is problematic. That gives us a defined use-case when it comes to things that have real-world analogues, but the more fantastical you get the more curious the outcome becomes.

Like, alien toys. If I put in a generic little green man martian, whose soul ends up in it? Or is it just a 'fake' mind?

And then take a step back from there. Lets say I put in a toy of an Asari from mass effect (I don't actually know if Mass effect even got toys, lets assume it did). Does the toy remember being the Asari from the game? Or is it just her voice actor waking up in a tiny alien body?

We're fucked.

>acquire a figure of young Hitler
>bring it to life and keep it locked away
>see how the timeline changes with him suddenly falling into a coma and never waking up

Yes, but then it would just turn into a normal nonmagical board game.

So what would happen is I got a store mannequin, a mermaid tail prop and made a mermaid?

Because I love the idea of Making Mermaids real.

>ITT: people who did not read any of the sequels

if you had read the second book you would know that the KEY was magical, not the Cupboard.

also, it doesn't "turn things real," it swaps out actual people from history with the figurines, but in miniature. Little Bear the indian and Boone the cowboy were actual people from the 19th century, living in the American west until they were suddenly sucked into the forms of tiny figurines, and it is explicitly stated in the books that when they are returned to the cupboard and the key is turned again, they return to their own timelines and lives.

similarly, in the second novel, the plastic army man who was previously animated into Tommy the WWI Medic turns into a DEAD plastic army man when the Key is turned, as the real-life Tommy died during the war. also, Bright Stars, the wife of Little Bear from the first book, shows up pregnant when she is brought back a second time, because she was pregnant in her own real life, and not because a Pregnant Toy Indian Squaw figure was placed in the cupboard. finally, Omri himself (the main character of the book, a child in modern day reality) travels back in time to the 19th century and inhabits a drawing on the walls of Little Bear's longhouse after sending himself back in time by sitting in a large chest and turning the Key.

thus the Key does not animate the inanimate; it instead casts a person's consciousness THROUGH time to temporarily possess an inanimate object, just like the Great Race of Yith from the Lovecraft mythos.

seriously guys these were some of my favorite books as a kid.

fuck the Algonquins

But what would happen with other toys? Nothing? He did like Godzilla and robots in the movie.

Put in every dragon dildo and Amiibo I own, that is, none.

Put A LOT of plasticine inside, end up with a shape-shifting creature.

Put in the figurines of the world's most renown geniuses, end up with my own genius squad.

So i just make a line of sexdolls based on the hottest people throughout the ages. They can't sue me forward through time.....can they?

>Hitler falls asleep in the Furherbunker in 1945
>He is captured by the Soviets, who experiment on him in a secret lab for years to try and wake him up, until eventually they all accidentally get purged when a clerk of Stalin's misstamps some paperwork

Can't fight history.