Why doesn't your character use their money to buy a mansion and maids and live in comfort for the rest of their life?

Why doesn't your character use their money to buy a mansion and maids and live in comfort for the rest of their life?

Because my last game of MAID rpg was enough chaos for one lifetime. I'm not turning my current game into one.

They aren't immortal yet.

Maids drop poor loot

First you get immortality
Then you get the bitches

Last time I tried the GM burned down the mansion for a plothook. All them meidos. All dem cheeseboigahs.

Because I'm the DM.
But I love giving my players property like a school or a tavern or a museum or a mansion. It often really helps tie them into the world and care about what happens in it, and serves as a base of operations and quite often a trophy hall.

Clearly you've never had to deal with Combat Maids before.

They did. The maids may have also been trained as barbarians.

She's on a mission from God, can't rest until it's done. Also, too poor to afford a mansion.

You can't have an interesting adventure or story without some !!~~!!CONFLICT!!~~!!. If you want to laze around in a mansion with 50 maids, that's what real life is for.

You are all missing the important part.

WHY DOESN'T THAT MAID HAVE A REFLECTION?!

Because we're forever broke. The ship's monthly payments, maintenance costs and refueling costs are just shy of 500k Cr a month, trading only does a man so much good and even when we make enough to break a decent profit half of it gets blown off in collateral, ammo and repair fees.

>he can't afford an exact duplicate room to make people think the window between them is a mirror

wrong angle.

Comfort is for the weak.

1. Getting job done and being alive afterwards is expensive
2. The retirement-tier paycheck usually involves dragons which means you're gonna be dead one way or another.

Paladin, basically. That sort of covers it.

Maybe he'll retire one day. Or maybe he'll kamikaze into a demon. Either's good.

i feel like if your character doesn't have a continuous motivation to adventure you kinda gave your character a shitty backstory

When you're guaranteed a spot in heaven, death is just a pleasant retirement.

>Why doesn't your character use their money to buy a mansion and maids and live in comfort for the rest of their life?

Wealthy patrician lifestyle (affluent) is minimum 450 gold a month. Assuming they settle for that and have 65 years of natural life remaining, they'd each need like 351k to do that.


They'll need to do a *lot* of adventuring before they can even think about that kind of retirement.

Because he built the mansion with his own two hands and magic. No maids because it's got spells worked into the stone to clean stuff up.
He has also enchanted some wires running throughout the mansion with the ability to project a magical equivalent of Jarvis.
Never mind all the other bells and whistles.

My character would kill to have so much money.. in fact, that's what she's doing

>that guy who always plays a female character

>the point of maids is to clean

Around the turn of the 20th century, a family with two servants was considered "lower middle class".

Back to with you, Kazuma. Lazy NEET.

Because he already has a wizard tower.

My character is a robot. It cannot own money, and it was not programmed to covet mansions, maids, or comfort.

Because his ancestral lands are held by blood-crazed revolutionaries, and they need to be stamped out first.

How many maids live in your wizard's tower?

one of them's been living off of a handful of credits for pretty much her entire life, and has only recently come into a fortune through some fucking crazy shenanigans at an arena - and even then, she's wanted by the empire, so settling down will be pretty fuckin' hard.
the other is like, 16 and piloting mecha, who the fuck needs a mansion?

maybe some day.

Because she is the maid, and presumably upon learning the meaning of service she'll regain the standard retinue of angelic powers and return to the legions of heaven.

I built a castle.

He figures that he was given magic for a reason (WM sorcerer in a low-ish magic world), and should use it for good.

>Live in a magnificent mansion full of Victorian furniture
>Cats everywhere, cute and fuzzy cats that rub up against your leg when you walk past them and somehow don't trigger my allergies (it's magic I ain't gotta splain shit)
>Hardworking but clumsy and goofy cute maids who often mess things up by accident
>The older, ara ara~ head maid who treats her underlings as if they were her own daughters
>You will never cherish an unrequited affection for her

This is my second most ideal life experience

Does it desire to be a maid?

>he hasn't played enough maid RPG to know vampires are stupid common house-servants

Are you the master in this situation or one of the maids?

The master, obviously.

My last character basically did this. She was the daughter of a wealthy merchant family who ran away from home because she felt stifled and wanted freedom. Eventually her father got sick and she reluctantly returned home to take care of things and live in her mansion with her maids.

The other players set up shop in the city (one of the largest in the setting). The wizard joined the mages guild there, another player set up his own business, another purchased a tavern.

We spent maybe a dozen sessions or so dealing with life in the city, working to improve our respective businesses, helping each other out with problem, stopping crazy cultists and serial killers.

We eventually decided to have the timeframe skip ahead by a couple of decades. By this point our characters were all incredibly important movers and shakers in the nation and we started playing our character's children who went out adventuring and stuff.

My character is looking for love, and won't stop untill he finds a qt orc grill.

He figures the only way to do that is to get famous.

That doesn't look very unrequited.

That everything. Excellent taste, user.

>buying a mansion
>wasting good gold to hire shitty maids
>not just casting Mordenkainen's Magnificent Mansion every afternoon before tea.

Step it up.

Not "obviously". I don't know your life, and I know at least three girls for whom "treats [you] like one of her own daughters" is appealing.

>shitty maids
You gay?

>not summoning and binding powerful extraplanar entities and making them do household chores for you just because you can

Huh. That's even better than what I came up with (). Like, it's too late now, but I'm going with that if I ever roll "angel/devil" again.

>The PC is an extravagant nobleman mage
>He once fought a Pit Fiend to a standstill and then mindraped him until he no longer remembered all the evil in his heart
>He is now the kindhearted head maid of the mansion
>His hobbies are boardgames, gardening, ballroom dancing and taking care of the horses

Ten but says she's a lezzie too.

D'awww.

>Character is a fey Royal
>Literally has a god damn giant thistle castle complete with nymph maids
>Has a charisma so high that bitches melt upon first contact, all day every day
Sometimes its good to be King.

>Play a Comfort Sorcerer
>Only know spells like Magnificent Mansion, Tiny Hut, Heroes Feast.
>Have spells for binding outsiders to act as maids, Summon Carriage, Minor/Major Creation etc.
>Put all your gold into purchasing a giant flying carpet big enough for your whole party to ride.
>Be worthless in a fight, but every adventuring team wants you in their group anyway.

Violating someone's mind on a fundamental level has never been so cute.

So what do you do on Saturday and Sunday?

It was not programmed with that desire or the related skillset. An outside party could conceivably program both into it, although modifications to its chassis would be required to make it a suitable maid.

Train.

Bard.

He doesn't want to retire. He wants to be the head librarian of the royal library, a job which was to be his until he became obsessed with a magical book and thrown out. So now he's working on getting rich as all fuck, after which point he intends to drive the kingdom into a minor economic crisis, then bail it out in exchange for being named head librarian and warden of the royal library and being granted a title of nobility and immunity to any consequences for practicing magic. At which point he intends to propose to the woman who he'd expected to marry before, but who told him to "come back once he got his head on straight" when he was chased away for practicing magic (which is forbidden in this setting).

Man, I didnt know I was into robot maids, but I am now.

Adventure.

Dirty thoughts are bad!

>a family with two servants was considered "lower middle class".
OP said mansion with maids.

If he wants a small estate with just two ordinary servants (i.e. not attractive women willing to perform sexual favors. He can get a butler with an British accent and a kind aged maid), I'll let him downgrade to "Prosperous" at 100gp a month. Over 65 years that's still 78,000 gold.

If he can establish an income, perhaps by owning a bunch of farmland, he might not need to save up as much.

You gave me inspiration for my next character. A halfing rogue whose goal is to become rich enough to buy a mansion and hire maids of all races. Human maids, elf maids, dwarf maids. More exotic races like yuan-ti maids and aarakocra maids who clean the ceilings. A pool with sahuagin maids and merfolk maids. All races will live in harmony as maids in his mansion.

Only PC I ever had for more than one session spent more than half of his time attending to his luxurious castle and managing his servants.

There's no reason it can't be two maids. That's probably even better, because there's less competition for master's attention.

Not rich enough yet. Someday!

>trading only does a man so much good

What edition?

Were this Mongoose 1e, I'd just tell you to trade in radioactives all day, every day, and have tens of millions within a month.

Because my group knows we have no choice but to remain murder hobos because we all know the DM will just take it away within a few sessions to provide a plot hook.

Because comfort is for the weak. What is a house but a tomb to die in? What are servants but gentle gravediggers? Until I truly die, I resolve to truly live.

Hire maids that can defend themselves.

Because the DM said I'm not allowed to just send other idiots to do my adventuring for me while I live it up in a mansion because I made all the money.

Ahh a more benign version of count monte cristo then? Nice!

Oho? Here have an innocent robo girl as a welcome to the robo fetishists club!

More maid pics like that plz! Its..for a friend.

He can get two old women who aren't interested in him and have a 20% chance to report him if harassed. Or one expert middle-aged maid who is not terribly attractive, but knows her rights and will probably press charges if significantly bothered by her employer.

If he wants an anime harem lusting after master's dick, then he'll need to pony up more dosh than that.

He can earn his happy ending, sure, but that's his endgame. It's something for him to think about in the dungeon. But for now, he's rifling through the pockets of slain orcs, counting the coins he looted and hoping for a gemstone, nursing his painful stinging flesh-wounds, and wondering what grisly death lurks in the next room.

You can't say that you're truly living if you don't have maids.

Almost as bad as nagging robomaids.

I can't speak for everyone but if I'm lusting after master's dick I'm willing to work for less money. Job satisfaction matters more than pay in determining happiness, user.

Failing to max out Aigis's social link is one of my greatest regrets in life. I was one rank below max and we went out on the last day before Nyx but nothing happened. Someday I'll replay the game and go for her. I'm sorry I wasted so much time with Mitsuru, I didn't realize who the real best girl was until it was too late.

Nah, see, that's when you use your Expertise in Persuasion to convince all those young princesses you saved that their destiny is to serve you in any way you desire.

You get the maid harem and for free on top of it.

>>failed to pop that robot cherry
You are a failure at life user, and should commit sudoko.

because he craves adventure. He doesn't want to settle down, he would get bored. Also, as a government monster slayer the pay sucks. The pension package is generous, but doesn't kick in until something like 25 years of service.

I know. I actually had dreams about how lonely her life must be after the events of the game when there are no shadows left to fight and the Kirijo Group just leaves her in a closet to gather dust.

She truly is best girl isn't she? After all she truly irrevocably loves you. Don't worry man, load scumming exists for such noble purposes try and you will touch her heart/boink her depending on how you view the fade to black.
Damnit i now get why Ainz is always grinning, now i have to add "get hax powers and Maid harem to the list.."

She's a toaster, she doesn't love you.

Because he is a superhero.

Now why you got to be so cruel, do you want to make the poor girl cry? After all in order to summon stand..personas you got to have a soul+sentience so...

Batman has Alfred. Why can't you have a maid?

Because I use the money on charity and live in a modest flat, not in a fuckhuge mansion.

I can't afford supermodel maids. Or butlers, for that matter.

Is it bad that I want to put a cheerful NPC android/gynoid who helps the party into my next sci-fi game?
>I have acquired the groceries!
>You seem to need help relaxing. I suggest the 7:30 PM showing of 'The Black Gate', a movie you have been showing interest in recently.
>Will you need me to support you on your next combat outing? I have lesser firearms expertise as part of my defensive programming, though my frame is not designed for heavy damage.
>I have repaired your personal computer and defragmented the hard drive.
>I have cleaned your guns because you have forgotten to do so after 'hitting the bar' last night.
>You appear to be suffering from a hangover. I have prepared a high-calorie breakfast with raised hydration levels to help you recover faster.

Alfred is a super hero in his own right.

And what will she do when someone tries to fuck her? Cause you know someone will try.

>hangover
>not just giving me an oxygen tank and mask

This model is inefficient. bring me a new one

...

Tried to find the proper reaction pic, failed. Have a cute crimson demon instead!
If you perform such an act you will be too kind to your party, whats the catch, you plan to summon the reapers on them?

>your robot maid becomes the avatar of the robotic old gods
>is still really nice to you when speaking to you, but is definitely convinced you should be assimilated or annihilated

>I am not designed for 'affectionate encounters'. I can, however, acquire multiple different suitable replacement 'toys' discreetly.
>If you wish to recreate an imagined sexual encounter more accurately, I suggest locking off the virtual reality chamber for your temporary personal use.
>I will defend myself if need be, as listed in my instruction manual. After all, I am classified as a Lesser Sapient under Inter-Galactic General Law.
>However, I can be tasked to go on dates.
>Legal marriage will require my consent and other factors depending on regional or planetary law. You currently register in my databanks as a 'Comrade', rather than 'Possible Lover' or 'Close Friend'.
>That method creates a temporary placebo effect, rather than actual results. If you truly wish to undertake this method, I will oblige you, though the most efficient method of overcoming hangovers is initial prevention.
This would be in a definitely-not-Star-Wars setting where the Empire's more Lawful neutral and the Rebels Chaotic Neutral, so the party would be part of a war effort and be risking their necks every day. An gynoid aide is the least the Empire can do for their prestigious allies.

He did, he shadowruns to prove he can now. Superhuman psychosis is a hell of a drug.

My character's a member of a race that's considered subhuman and not allowed to own land or property. Their place in society is usually that of slaves or cannon fodder.

Still not bad enough add mo-..constant blue balling along with near certain death daily. Hmm almost there add a definitely not Vader/Palpatine combo and it will be enough to offset the kind act.

>NotShepard has finaly found love
>the reap-..parents have requirements in order for you to marry the daughteru.
>"Welp synthesis doesn't sound so bad, throw Kaidan in there he will do.