Didn't see one already so why not? Post your best that guy stories!
>Be at game, at friends house. >Have new player. >Never played with him. >No one has. Host met him a few days before at game shop. >3 hours later game is going good. >Party has just Completed a hard fight. >Party goes to talk to the king about our reward. >New guy, demands the kings daughter for the night.. Thefuck.jpg >DM tries to talk him out of him from this. >Party tries to talk him out of it. >He then challenges the king to a dual. >Fights king. >Some how wins. FMW.jpg >Listen to him complain when the GM wouldn't let him go in to graphic detail about how he rapes the Queen, and princess.
He wouldn't stop bitching about how it wasn't fair, and it really broke his view of the game.
Oh I forgot that the princess npc was only 7 years old. We never let him play with us again.
Logan Wilson
I'm surprised you even let him finish the session.
Landon Flores
When I was in High School one of our players would always threaten to commit suicide in character if we didn't do whatever he wanted. The general response was "Okay, go ahead". Eventually he actually did it, and we finally managed to get him kicked out.
The only reason he was even in the group is that he was going out with one of the players we actually liked. After his character killed himself out of metagaming spite even she agreed to it.
Matthew Bennett
>fights king why not the king's personal champion/retainer that's ten levels higher than the pcs
>guy does something irreverent and stupid so he can accuse the DM of railroading Drives me up the fucking wall. I can't stand when the players feel like that have to beat the DM's story.
Angel Jenkins
>Be in group with hawt gamer girl >Had a massive crush on her from day dot >Two lines of greentext in and you can already guess where this is going >Heading home after a marathon session, I'm the first out because I'm the only one with stuff to do the next day >Get a text from her >"user, I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it. I have a massive crush on you." >Stunned >Text back "Wow user-ette, I've felt the same way about you." >No response. >An hour goes by and my phone vibrates >GM has sent me a photo >Open it up >It's the whole group laughing >GM had got his hands on user-ettes phone and, knowing how I felt about her, sent me the text. >user-ette is laughing.
I shouldn't care. It's not like I thought anything would ever happen or that I stood a chance, but jesus, why does that hurt so much?
Cooper James
>everybody comes to the game with an evil character except that guy >he wants to play a paladin >ohfuck.jpg >won't let us do evil things >is surprised when we fireball his ass and leave him for dead
Jason Sanders
It hurts because you got cucked user.
Oliver Bell
Sounds like your friends are real assholes, and you're better off without her.
Kayden Brown
If you're going to go that far, just tell him "No" out of character, and if he gets belligerent about you not allowing rape at a table, kick him the fuck out.
Gavin Brown
I see it's a 35 minute video. TLDW
Nolan Carter
What the fuck man, who does that
Julian Smith
nobody acts like this in real life, this is something out of a movie
Gabriel Gonzalez
Because that was a dick move on the DM's part.
It's not the type of thing that should ruin friendships or end the campaign, but you should definitely say that wasn't funny and move on.
Jack Howard
This is something I would expect in an 80's movie, not in modern day real life.
I'm calling shenanigans.
Joshua Miller
This is why groups should make characters and decide on the tone of the campaign as a group. Seriously, 60% of that guy stories could be circumvented that way.
Jacob Hernandez
>Playing Mage: The Awakening with a homebrew setting >That Guy is playing a Mind mage specialist >Rest of the group is a Time mage, Life Mage and Prime Mage. >Our group is on the run, being hunted down >Decided to lay low >That Guy wants to lay low in style >Brainwashes some rich yuppie, and we move on in to her place >Sure, it's a shitty thing to do but we accept it given the current situation >Find out a few days later, RL, that That Guy was having side-session with the GM via text >All is well and good, we all do it from time to time for one reason or another >Find out that That Guy has been using his magic to re-write the yuppies brain and make her desire him sexually >Life mage is a Fem-user with levels in Feminazi and SJW >'WTF, you're raping her?' >I'm trying to figure out how to defuse the situation >His response: "It's not rape. She genuinely wants to fuck me now." >'Come on guys, it's just a game. Let it fade to black. Our characters don't know about the rape.' >That Guy gets defensive: "No, it's not rape. It's consensual. I made her want it." >GM forces a pin in it, and we stop discussing it at the table, >That Guy has talked to me about it RL and genuinely sees nothing wrong with his belief.
Luke Sanders
>GM is running a game >WFRP with all the PC's playing wizards and witches. >That Girl decides, when told this explicit information, to make a Witch Hunter that doesn't realise she's a witch. >Is explained that magic doesn't really work that way in this setting. It's not implicitly intuitive and it needs some training. >Says she can make it work. >GM okays this for reasons unknown. >That Girl spends the entirety of the first session trying to take us to trial for witchcraft, even though we've not cast a single spell between us since the game started and, as far as the setting is concerned, we are indistinguishable from anyone else in this village. >No evidence, no local villagers pointing fingers. >Just out of nowhere, Witch Hunter. >Decide we can still roll with this, figure she's aiming for the 'OH GOD I AM A WITCH, MY LIFE IS A LIE' sort of opening. A bit cliched, but eh, whatever works for her. >She gets Templars of Sigmar involved. >Uses her magical ability to fabricate evidence against us. >Casual does this. No big 'oh god, I'm a wizard' moment. Just uses magic like it was second nature. >We end up killing the Templars and, due to a daemonic incursion caused by the Witch Hunter, leave her character to die. >She RL bitches us out and says 'Why didn't you save me?!' >Apparently 'Because you've been trying to get us killed and are clearly the villain' wasn't a good enough reason for her. >She bitched to the GM and demanded a restart. >There has not been a second session.
I really fucking hate my group sometimes.
Levi Rivera
I don't know what you want me to say. My GM is just a cunt.
Aiden Scott
Why do you game with him then?
Jason Richardson
I'm calling shenanigans. I don't believe your story happened.
If you want to prove it, post the texts.
Robert Garcia
Either openly mock anyone who plays a divine caster while including an "enlightened" atheist Mary Sue GMPC, or go full evangelical Christian and have the plot just be you asserting the dominance of a new monotheistic religion over the established pantheon of the setting. Choose whichever option is more likely to piss off your group.
Jose Moore
I don't know sometimes. He's one of my oldest friends. It's not like he's a shit all the time. But when he is, he goes all the way with it.
For reference: He's the Mind Mage here. And the GM here.
He's also part of the longest gaming group I've ever been a part of, and I get along really well with the others. He's just...something I have to tolerate from time to time.
It's not like I'm tripping over gaming groups down here. Especially ones with some staying power.
Henry White
Fuck, wrong thread. Still fairly on topic though I guess.
Tyler Carter
For reference, this is the phone that I'm posting all this from. It doesn't connect to Veeky Forums half the time. If you tell me how the fuck to take a screencap and post it from this thing, I'll do it gladly.
Benjamin Watson
What was the intended thread?
Caleb Wood
Try pressing the Volume Up key and the Power key at the same time.
Ian Foster
...
Lincoln Baker
that's a pretty good one
Nathan Kelly
user dont worry and show up, you are hurt we get that. But think about this, your group is gonna tease you with that shit for ages, unless you go with the joke. Im not saying that you should become your group laugthing stock, just dont give importance to it (i know its hard, and you are hurt and embarrased). Its they say something you just go with the joke thats all, make it not about you but about the group, like that memories that were bad at the moment but while remembering them now you laugh as how foolish you were.
Just be honest, you arent gonna get the girl but they are gonna lost the interest in teasing you.
Ian Watson
Cheers for advice, but it's old news. That shit happened a long while ago.
Alexander Jackson
Not an RPG story, but I got to reminiscing with some old friends and we had this one random idiot we once put up with.
>Playing a WW2 grand strategy game. >I'm the Soviets. >Ahistorically go to war with Japan in September of 1939, give a bit of ground, but in a retaliatory strike, I launch some submarines, and sink and scatter the Japanese convoys off of the Japanese coast. >Japan needs those convoys to hold up their end of the trade agreement with the U.S. >Turn ends, very luckily for us, and with Japan in default of their trade agreement, which has some MASSIVE effects on U.S. entry. (America has a lot of restrictions on when they can declare war and what they can do while neutral) >So huge victory for the Allies! >Except the American player doesn't think so. >He gets up in my face and asks me what the hell I was thinking, because I "disrupted his build plan" because he now only has 10 BP, instead of 11 due to the trade with Japan. >Think he's joking at first, since the loss of trade hurts Japan a hell of a lot more, and I probably pushed up the U.S. entry into the war by four months, which is worth a hell of a lot more than one measly build point. >Attempts to laugh it off only get him madder >I HAD IT ALL CALCULATED! NOW I HAVE TO RE-DO MY GEARING! NEVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT AGAIN!
The game fell apart due to reasons unrelated to his insanity, but there's a reason he never got an invite back.
Justin Young
Getting upset when other players affect you in a multiplayer game is just dumb. I see it constantly though.
Jordan Rivera
Yes, but this was getting upset when I helped him tremendously.
I realize most people don't play World in Flames, but just for a bit of context, up until 1942, the U.S. player draws 1 entry chit a turn, plus more that you get when people declare war or conquer crap: Getting 2 chits off the USE is like getting 2 free turns.
If he gets his gear up entry option (Something you need to do before you go to war) that's about 10 build points right there. For the cost of a measly build point, I almost guaranteed that Option 22 would be played 2 turns earlier, which nets him 20 BP in a little bit.
No, that pisses him off because he has to re-plan his builds.
Robert Turner
Never forget what you are. The rest of the world won't. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.
Ryder Adams
That sounds like autism, mixed with poor socialization. Having trouble seeing anything outside of you specific plan, and being annoyed when that plan is interfered with is very autistic behavior, and if he hadn't properly learned how to deal with frustration and interact with people it would be pretty normal to get unreasonably angry. So you might have been playing with an autistic guy with mediocre to bad parents. Real autism, not Veeky Forums autism.
Brayden Richardson
>Hosted a Games Day at our FLGS in the CBD for gamers in the fetish community >Playing 'Terror in Meeple City' >Rules say, whoever makes the best monster impression gets the first turn >We're in public, so I say "We'll just randomise it" >Group says no >They each, in turn, try and let out a deep guttural roar >Getting looks from other games in the store >That Chick lets out an eye-piercing screech that was audibly painful to hear >Store owner is looking our way now >"Come on guys, chill it out" >That Guy gets up >Stand on the fucking table >Stomps his fucking Doc Martins down >Crushes the box lid >Knocks the fucking board off the table >Roaring like a fucking autist >Me and store owner kick him the fuck out >The event is nearly banned from the store, but we manage to talk him out of it because it brings a lot of business his way.
Fucking retards, everywhere.
Luis Gonzalez
I also don't believe this cliche bulshit happened. But if it did, I think you should put it behind you. Maybe make some healthy brownie shakes for the whole group. Pity we never got the recipe, but you could figure something out.
Jayden Gray
Stop being a pussy and beat his ass.
Adrian Reed
> Guys help! Someone in our group doesn't want to let us be murder hobos!
Ayden Diaz
What kind of poorly socialized shit are you?
It happened a long while ago now. It's just been one of those stupid things that I've hung onto. Just random dumb shit that every now and then'll keep me up at night.
Robert Anderson
If the rest of the group wants to play murder hobos then the one guy going against them is in the wrong.
You sound like you have battered housewife syndrome. I'm worried for you. Take a step back and think about exactly how he's impacted your life, is your friendship worth what he does to you? Maybe try to call him out on his shit, when someone thinks they're just teasing a nice "It isn't fucking funny!" can be a good way to get an apology.
Matthew Green
>not just including her in the party getaway I know it's metagaming but what the fuck did you expect? When you out of character know that you are fucking over someones character and still do it anyway, of course someone is going to be pissed.
Oliver Ortiz
>Maybe try to call him out on his shit, when someone thinks they're just teasing a nice "It isn't fucking funny!" can be a good way to get an apology.
Yeah, and that's exactly what I did.
There's a big difference between calling someone out on their shit and assaulting them, you fucking autist.
It's a recurring issue with her. She just like playing really antagonistic characters. She's the life mage from Sure, in that example she was making a decent point, but she also routinely engages in body-horror, threatening and carrying out attacks on other characters if she doesn't get her way and bitching to the GM about powergaming if we figure out a way to knock her shit off.
Easton Flores
Oh no, I'm not the person suggesting you "beat his ass", that's fucking retarded.
John Flores
I'm sure it's not what it's like literally all of the time, but the fact that you have these stories means you should probably not play with these guys anymore. If there's any running theme here it's that they're bullies who play in part to take advantage of people. Both in game and in real life.
Josiah Gonzalez
You were right not to. It's someone presenting an old as fuck copy pasta as their own story
The story in question was this one. The Furry Rape Planet. He adds lots of little florishes to the story, but it's the same exact story.
Dylan Clark
>“It’s like the story they tell about my brother—he was losing money in a gambling-place in Saratoga. >Someone said to him, ‘Davy, why do you go there—don’t you know the game is crooked?’ >‘Of course it’s crooked,’ said he, ‘but, damn it, it’s the only game in town!’”
Wyatt Phillips
This sort of happened to me but way more cucked and embarrassing. I believe you.
Aiden Hernandez
What happened, bro?
Blake Johnson
I don't understand this shit. The second a group of other players came in and described themselves as furries and expressed intent to rape the groups PCs, I'd leave the game.
Jack Cooper
Story time!
Anthony Thompson
Didn't the author of those posts say he knew the tripfag here and was relaying the story from said tripfag?
Xavier Myers
On further reflection, you are correct.
Oi, faggot, if you're still here, TURN UP YOUR GODDAMN AUDIO! I COULDN'T HEAR SHIT AND ALMOST BLEW MY SPEAKERS OUT SWITCHING TO A NEW TAB
William Jackson
Copy pasted lmao
Zachary Richardson
Yeah. Same guy, dude.
Kayden Butler
(You)
Evan Adams
(You)
Mason White
Bump for hope of a story.
Asher Perez
I was going to say this. I'm autistic (though very high functioning, most people don't realize it until I say something) and yeah, I like having things neat and orderly; detailed plans, carefully documented proceedures; I think that's one of the things that draws me to science.
Anyway, yeah, if I were a bit lower functioning and less socialized, I could absolutely see myself blowing up over someone screwing up my plan, even if it did help me. As it is, when things change unexpectedly for me or someone deviates from a plan, even if it's beneficial, it still irks me a little.
Elijah Wright
Playing Lords and Ladies at a local bar's board game night. That guy had a baby making engine where she could only fail to make babies on box cars. I have a card to marry off one of her sons to a maid and play it.
In that game only the latest married generation can make babies, can now only make babies on 3 or less on 2d6.
Player rage quits and bitches until we all stop playing. >Not enough beer for this.
Logan Cook
Yeah, that's what I was thinking, but I have to admit, finding a way to ruin their fun does sound like more fun. I mean, if you're going to do a rape erp without even telling most of those present that that's what you're doing, then you deserve to have your game ruined. Of course if the dm just kept the rape train solidly on the rails and refused to allow me to derail, then I'd go. At that stage it's about who can ruin who's day more, and if the most I can do is just leave, then I will.
Samuel Price
Bahaahahhahaloser!
Michael Rogers
>Bahaahahhahaloser! >Baha ah a hh a halo ser! >Bahamas are a Horus Heresy, a Halo, sir!
Aiden Mitchell
>Our characters don't know about the rape.' rape has always been a really known thing in any society .
Jacob Nguyen
Beta Bar?
Jonathan Sanders
It does not sound like he considers you a friend. Fuck them, cut your losses and find another group.
Christopher Long
Your just mad that I posted my story before you could steal it from me.
Dominic Fisher
Sweet summer child.
Logan Harris
>fucking over a party and expecting them to take hear along anyway What exactly did you yourself expect here? She arranged to have them all killed, her plan didn't work, she paid for it. All's fair.
Henry Cook
It's the other way around though.
Oliver Cooper
Why the fuck would we include them in the getaway when she was trying to kill us? At no stage did the character make herself seem like a friend or ally to us.
If she was being this much of a shit from the get go, do you think she'd somehow become easier to bear over time?
Dominic Young
Okay, you have to admit they did get you pretty good.
Jacob Sanchez
Okay... So your trying to be me then?
Jonathan Anderson
(20staryou)
Dylan Wood
Here's your (You).
Aiden Jenkins
more, more stories
Isaac Hall
Then contribute.
Mason Hall
/k/ sperm brownies?
Nicholas Morris
i never played with any mental patients
Caleb Wilson
The gutbuster brownies. Or was that chocolate cream?
Ryan Davis
Well I'm fucking lost. I'm going to get more coffee.
Kayden Sanchez
A great story, but he's referring to the Magic Brownie Mix.
Jaxson Hall
>just got into Warhammer 40k >At one of the LGS in my town >little did I know it was well known for being "that guys" game store >I asked the manager if anyone was looking for a game >finds me a guy >"I can play but only 1000 pts or higher" >"uh... I guess if I take tons of upgrades and unpainted models I can push it up there..." >"that's fine" >I scrounge up every model I own and waste tons of points on retarded upgrades but I'm at 1000 >he brings out a motherfucking Knight >proceeds to tear my asshole apart >seriously it's already pretty bad to bring a knight at 1000 points but against a new guy too?
Ethan Smith
Ah.
Adrian Phillips
What's the best story you've got then?
Ian Clark
>I don't want to have a God in my pantheon, I don't believe in gods because I'm an atheist
>shitstorm ensues
Nicholas Gutierrez
Even as a staunch atheist in real life, I always wonder how you can have an atheist character in D&D. Many of the gods actually talk directly to humans, and there's proof of their existence everywhere. You'd have to be pretty retarded to be an atheist really.
Evan Scott
Because they're just regular people who got lucky (like Cayden) or powerful mages, meaning "real" force of nature or concept incarnate gods don't exist.
Jeremiah Ward
I wish I realize this simple truth earlier
Kayden Myers
>Hey GM, what's the name of this town we're going to? >"I dunno! Your character has visited the town before though -" >he has? >"Yeah! Why don't you just tell me what this new town is called and what business you had there?"
>Alright GM, the majordomo says we need to clear out some ghosts. That's a successful knowledge check. What do I know about ghosts? >"What an interesting question! How about you tell me a few rumors your character's heard about ghosts before?
>Okay, that's a pretty good survival check. Does that help us cut through the forest any faster? >"Yeah, the ranger finds a shortcut" >cool, I guess we- >"How about you tell us what the shortcut is." >What? >"Tell us about the shortcut you found."
Hey, GM, about you do your fucking job please?
Gabriel King
>Gothic/Cthulhu/bizarro late 19th century Russia. >White 'Drow' invading from a maelstrom in the Kara Sea. >That Guy accuses DM of racism because he made evil Drow race deliberately white. >'No, it just fits their homeland, y'know? Make it a big different.' >Game continues. Increasing racism from That Guy who got triggered by 'white Drow'. >Some party members (including That Guy's character) die when giant bloated moth/zeppelin crashes. >That Guy rolls new character: Georgian former priest-in-training called Yugashvili. >Thinks it's clever as shit. >Focuses on social skills and rails against all non-whites, and also against the 'white Drow niggers'. >DM tells him to tone it down or That Guy'll get kicked from the group. >All other players agree or don't care; nobody sides with That Guy. >That Guy bitches some more, but quiets down for a while, changing into simple 'zealous patriot'. >Acceptable. >Party grows in reputation and power, and gets sent to Odessa to help stop marauding bashibazouks (mainly Turks, but also Orcs and Gnolls). >'Kill those fuckin' niggers and hillmonkeys!' >Great. This again. >Give That Guy a little bit of slack because it's a massacre in Odessa. >That Guy goes into detailed description of how he has his men round up bashibazouks, torture them, rape them and 'turn their dirty skins inside out'. >Final warning from DM to tone it down. None of us are particularly fond of graphic gore (because it's uninteresting). >That Guy blows up, saying DM won't let him be 'savior of the white race, like he was led to believe this game was about.' >WTF? >Continues with ridiculous bullshit like calling DM 'nigger-lover' and 'SJW' etc. >Gets kicked. >Game went much better afterwards. >Currently investigating why lake around St Nilus monastery is slowly being covered by thick, pulsating membrane. >weregoingtodie
Luis Lewis
In Dominions 4, the one true god has already left and a whole bunch of mages, mythical creatures and powerful beings are all pretending to be gods for patronage. Once they get enough people worshiping them, they will become an actual god.
What's hilarious is that there is a skeptic unit which weakens the people's faith in gods and thus makes the pretender gods weaker.
Jace Hill
>They're not gods they're just super powerful Sounds about right
Nicholas Walker
the best way to avoid this is to stop being racists in the first place.
Logan Martinez
What about Ao?
Tyler Brooks
Same. I mean, even if you agree to have freedom party needs to have some unspoken agreement that they're not being LOLRANDUM just for the hell of it or purposefully trying to derail the story they're in.