So we meet alien civilizations. We also find out that they are far more powerful (and more populated) than us...

Interesting. Care to share?

We tell them very politely not to rape us to death, and then proceed to negotiate terms of partnership.

Some years down the line, aliens are attending gender studies and anti-rape courses, while the patriarchy has secretely infiltrated the alien government and is now laughing it up, smoking cigars and drinking romulan ale while getting their dicked sucked.

I like the theory that life is soo rare in the universe that they'd be just as surprised and happy to see us as we would be.

So basically, the aliens do everything to help us and we fuck it all up because HFY.

One day I had the weird idea for a story where there is a galactic empire and the only reason they didn't went to us before was because we were living in the most desolate galaxy in the universe.

Considering carbon's propensity towards organizing itself and how much of it is actually in the universe I don't think life is particularly rare.
Complex life capable of interstellar travel may be rare.

>How would we react?

By dying in massive numbers (70-90%). To their alien space-germs that are probably more evolutionary complex than we are.

Assuming they've done the whole "first contact" thing before and give a shit enough to learn our biology and inoculate us against their space-germs...I dunno, sit in the corner quietly while the adults are talking? Deal with the insanely high suicide rate (not only are we not alone, we're insignificant), the apocalypse/cargo/xenophilic cults that would inevitably crop up, and getting our heads around the mind-bending scraps that our new friends/overlords/apathetic passers-by throw to us?

This is a pretty likely scenario since anybody that allready acts on the galactic scale is probably a lot more powerfull than us, potentially divinelly so.
We find the alien civilization that hits a good spot between being powerfull and being relatable to us and we offer outselves as a protectorate/ally in exchange for protection and technology. Then we get on with the business of becoming worthy and usefull allies while mantaining a certain pretense of neutrality not to burn any bridges with the others, playing the long safe diplomatic game to eventually become a respected force, colonizing the planets nobody else wants, researching the tech the others overlooked and so on.
When we'll have attained these objectives we'll pay back our old allies for their help.

>>strip mining planets when there are perfectly good asteroid fields in The system
>>retconning major religions that all allready include aliens as a possibility
>>taking earth's water when there's ice everywhere in the freaking system
>>biological specimens I concede.
You overestimate your importance to the aliens. Probably they'd just give no shit, take some resources we can't reach anyway and get out perhaps without even estabilishing contact.
Perhaps They're actually doing so now.
It's not like we ask permission to monkeys to cut some trees.

You forgot an option for that last one I think.

>To their alien space-germs that are probably more evolutionary complex than we are.

You don't actually know what evolution is, do you?

You don't get more "evolutionarily complex" germs just because you're in an advanced technological society. Hell, it's usually the simpler ones that just breed like mad that are the bigger problems.

While there would almost certainly be an exchange of diseases, Aliens would do better than we simply because they presumably have access to better medicine, but the idea that we'd have a Colombian style die-off is pretty absurd.

Yes, but due to the distances between potential sentient (of human-level or higher intelligence) life, it gives the illusion of rarity.

That would be pretty funny actually.

Another tought.
A space capable civilization doesn't actually need to fight for resources, water etc, because space is so retardedly big and the logistics of space travel are so complex that at that point they can just enter a system, take all the resources they need from the unhinabitated worlds, asteroids, moons etc and go away without any subspace civilization living nearby being none the wiser.
The only scarce resources for such a civilization would be ideas and information, the more alien the better. You've got all the wealth you might possibly need, but a completelly alien perspective on the universe, possibly ideas and philosophies You've never tought of due to difference in perspective and conditions; and that you can then put to use? How do you even begin to price that?
So I believe these aliens would give us glass marbles (relativelly advanced tech, relativelly huge amounts of resources) for the most precious goods we have by their perspective: informations on our culture, our art, our philosophy, our genes; and that they'd jealously guard THEIR culture from our discovery remaining mysterious and aloof to us. We'd notice we've been played only centuries after the fact.

>How would we react?
Nukes or chemical weapons I would hope.

>You don't actually know what evolution is, do you?

Evolution? Informed enough to know that organisms evolve to fill ecological niches, and that an alien world would have niches we've never dreamed of.
Virology? No, can't say that I'm that conversant. I did History as my second Major and have a pretty good idea of what happens when non-immune cultures are exposed to new organisms (See: Bubonic Plague (in China, then the Middle East, then Europe), Smallpox, Scarlet Fever, Too Many To List)

>the idea that we'd have a Colombian style die-off is pretty absurd.

So is the idea that we'd ever meet an alien civilization. But, arguments of 'absurd' aside, you're seriously skeptical of extra-terrestrial diseases wreaking havoc on a species that has already bred antibiotic resistant organisms on it's own planet...by accident? (tone aside, I enjoy that you put thought and actual knowledge in your response)

Assumptions: we don't know enought about the universe to estimate how rare is intelligent Life. Perhaps the galaxy is chocked full of civilizations, perhaps we're actually alone, we don't know.

The only resource Earth offers is genetic material. Water and minerals and shit are way easier to get in space if you have even halfway decent space travel.

We'd likely be a stock of research material and experimentation, or just plain coldly wiped out to avoid competition in the future.

Unless those space-germs developed alongside us for millions of years, it's a non-issue.

It's like inventing a whole new OS and expecting windows viruses to be able to do anything.

Carbon based is carbon based. And one species' beneficial gut bacteria is another's nightmare.

Unless we're talking about sentient gas clouds, or hive-mind crystal beings, which would come with a host of other problems.

>you're seriously skeptical of extra-terrestrial diseases wreaking havoc on a species

A species that evolved on another world. Most diseases are highly specific in what they target. It is rare for diseases to "jump" from one species to another even in the same family.

But you expect a possibly wildly different alien biology to just happen to carry plagues that are 1)compatible with human physiology, 2) harmful, and 3) yet different enough that an analog hasn't developed on earth such that we have no defenses?

Viruses and bacteria are always specific to hosts, they can't just infect any ol' organism they come across. The reason we have robust diseases is mostly because Europeans and Chinese lived in filthy cities for thousands of years, which were breeding grounds for all sorts of horrors (which is why the native americans were fucking wiped when the Europeans got there). The chances of some alien physiology being that exactly compatible with ours is astronomically unlikely on the same scale of trying to get the complete works of Shakespeare by means of monkeys banging randomly on typewriters: you could have a million of them do it from now to the heat death of the universe and it would probably not produce a single valid result.

gets it

We build even more smog-spewing machines for the sole purpose of poisoning our atmosphere to deliberately render our only planet uninhabitable.
It's not short-sighted and self-destructive, it just shows that Earth is too weak to keep up with us! HFY! HFY! HFY!

How would we react?
Poorly

That aside ive always had this HFY fantasy in my head of a hyper advanced race stumbles across us while engaged with an opposing, but less advanced race.
The first race has literally removed aggression, malice, and other "un evolved" to them emotions, to the point where they struggle to defend themselves. They find us and ask us to become thier warriors in exchange for bringing us into the stars.

Basically the whole speil Khan gave Kirk and Spock in Into Darkness, the federation having become soft and needing "a warriors mind"

I suggest we sell them cheap trinkets as artifacts of a primitive culture.

And see if they'll use us as cheap labor, so we can swipe the designs for FTL spaceships and Mister Fusions that can power a city with old banana peels.

this post deserves more attention
>The only resource Earth offers is genetic material
assuming they even care, if the aliens are so far out that their nanotechnology makes synthetic and organic meaningless categories they might care little if at all from the biodiversity on Earth.

What if they just want more land?

Sure you can chuck up lots of space stations but unless you have the ability to terraform a planet, (not sure quite where that sits on the technological scale) then living space is always at a premium.

this, actually.

>If aliens ever spent the resources to come see us they wouldn't leave without something of value.
Who knows, maybe they're post-scarcity and just have literally nothing better to do with their time than poke around the galaxy looking for interesting life-forms and whatnot.

introduce drugs, alcohol, tobacco, Veeky Forums, reddit, instagram, facebook, twitter, and STD-infected whores to them
make their civilization rot from within

>aliens who are basically English gentleman adventurers from 18th-19th century
>"I will find the source of that peculiar stream of X-radiation that planets in HKNT326 quadrant consider a source of life-creating biochemical mutation."
>Accompanied by "primitive" dwellers of nearby systems, who have much lower-level technology and are glad to work in exchange for few technological wonders, but know local space much better.

that would be so awesome

>"user! Bring my phased plasma rifle from the transport, i want that Spotted Gribbler skinned and over my captains chair before we break orbit next week!"

>"Ha! You humans never cease to amaze me, a simple chemical reaction kinetic weapon sure, but that "nugget" you call it dropped that charging bull Globeast like a crate of dueterium! Those horns and pelt will fetch a good price!"

God, i didnt know how much i needed this

...

I don't care. I WILL fuck one of them.

make it happen george

Or imagine them as tourists looking to build a small enclave on a more 'secluded' world.
Imagine giant reptilian monsters, but rather then enslaving us to build pyramids, they pay good wages and consider anything not made by nanomachines as 'crafts.'

>"Angor! Look! This warm-blood is wearing a machine-knit 'sweater'! They must be so cold outside an exosuit, bless them."

>they come to Japan
>become thoroughly confused why Japs made a ton of movies about them even though they had absolutely no contact with Earth before that

>personal log stardate 7954.7, shortly after planetfall one of my baggage porters was kidnapped by the stone age indigenous people of this planet. We had thought him lost for good until yesterday afternoon, we stumbled across thier village where he appears to have beaten all the males of the village in personal combat, and taken all the women as his personal harem. Apparently .25 of thier earths gravity here does wonders not only for the humans fighting prowess, but thier refractory period as well.

>must remember to pick up a few of these "mozan naguts" my porters all have next time we swing back to thier system. I am simply astounded at the variety of uses they find for these primitive weapons. Ive personally seen it used as a boat oar, a hammer, a tent pole, a cooking skewer, and a fearsome club among countless other uses. Apparently the humans had made millions of them in one of thier world wars, and millions more during one of thier first interplanetary wars in system

WE are getting to the ability to terraform a planet. Think of Israel. Also only chums live in a planet anyway. Smart races live in dyson swarms or nomadic fleets and bypass both game theory considerations (and the risk of being relativistically bombed) and the Fermi's paradox.

For some reason I'm vaguely reminded of something a user came up with about interdimensional aliens who like to hang out on our beaches and something about being mulit colored.

There's already a trilogy of this. "The Damned" series by Alan Dean Foster.

In 55 years of space flight we haven't even gone beyond our own moon. I should expect that any aliens we meet are more populous and powerful then us.

>tfw when superpowers already have FTL travel
>they just keep it strictly out of the news for political reasons
>they don't want other superpowers to know they have FTL, while each of them build off-world colonies
>all that astrophysical bullshit about conditions on exoplanets, which was somehow detected from Earth is actually gathered by FTL scouting probes

>not only are we not alone, we're insignificant

Why would that trigger suicides?

I guess many creationists would have a crisis of faith. "Oh noes, we are not the master species, the god's chosen, blahblahblah"

That's mostly due to political and economic concerns. Once we solve our problems on this rock then we can make some more progress.

Maybe.

Bioweapons and birthing incentives

Good. Maybe USA would drift more towards moderation and sanity if the worst offenders are proven utterly wrong.

But then again The Flat Earth Society is still a thing so what the fuck do I know.

>The Flat Earth Society
I don't understand how people can deny plain evidence thrown in their faces.
What do they think about the Earth's shadow being round during an eclipse? Have none of them ever flown? Is Magellan a lie?

The curvature of the horizon is an optical effect similar to that observed when you stick a straight object into water and it looks bent. The higher the altitude the more pronounced the curve is due to this effect being exaggerated by the changes in atmospheric density.

When you go on a flight "around" the world you are just going around the edge of the disc. The airline companies all show you a globe map because they are in on the ruse.

The Earths shadow on the moon being round is not the shadow of the Earth but the shadow of another planet, which as we all know are at most only a few miles across, passing between the sun and the moon.

Obviously all the moon missions are faked and the 400,000 - 500,000 people that worked on them are all lying.

each man is a god
each man is free

What are you talking about? Get back to wherever you came from.

>"Well would you look at that, Norm! This footwear was made by a real human child in one of their 'sweat shops'. Just look at the craftsmanship on it!"
>"Why it surely was, Margie. I heard they pay 'em real good wages in there, eh? Whole 500 cents a day."

They wouldn't, many faiths already believe that every people across the world received prophets analogous to Jesus, John, Mohammed, etc. So it wouldn't be a stretch to believe that another civilization received such a prophet and simply ignored their teachings or warped their words over time, sure we'd have the same religious tension with them we already do here, but given time we'd both manage to convert some of each other's populace and keep on religioning.

Catholic grays have been abducting children for years now.

It's a common HFY image.
They actually believe destroying our planet on purpose is a good thing.

>another civilization received such a prophet and simply ignored their teachings or warped their words over time
Or the opposite.
"Yeah, we know all about Jesus. We immediately made him king of our planet and preserved the laws written directly by his hand."
"After he died of old age, he has returned to us every 49 years since, to clear up any corruption or ambiguity in his teachings."
"Doesn't he do that on your planet? What happened?"

>h. Then how did he wash away your sins with his blood?
>a. What the fuck?
>h.he must be an impostor! Our lord loved us enough to die for us! Im guessing you don't even consume his sacred flesh either?
>a. Beam me up and nuke my current location.

Let's hope they don't got a jesus 2bh

>mineral rich
>Not just hitting any moon in the solar system/Mars or Mercury and ignore the one with a even remote chance of interfering the mining process.

Most likely if they're that powerful they give little to no fucks about our monkey asses. They'd pass through maybe stop and look at us with something like curiosity, scoop a few million up for study and promptly keep on rolling.

They have to be making money off it somehow. It's like Alex Jones and his water filters.

>America
>morality
That's rich

>Attempt HFY.
>Become Rhodesia instead.

I am more than fine with this.

Sadly our problems on earth tend to be the type that multiply when you spend money on them. It's entirely possible that welfare spending is the great filter.

Do you think some people think that native americans were as biologically distant from europeans as all humans are from aliens?

That would make so many things make sense.

>Ayy lmaos join a film actor's guild
>Kaiju movies have to be made with alien stars playing the monsters/heroes instead of special effects

Glorious.

...

kek

Oh, yeah. But I'm sure it's satire.

>>FTL
Not in this universe, Space Cowboy.

Now I'm not sure if satire or not.

What's rodhesia?

>>bigoted protestants
We should have destroyed heresy with a lot more efficiency.
This guy knows what's up
Creationists are an absolute minority and they've been so since Thomas Aquinas.

It's what Zimbabwe was called when it was run by white people.

>"We"

Impotent attacks, worship, suicides, negotiations.

>HFY
"Humanity! Fuck You!" ?

Back to /b/ with that bait

What I'd fear is specialised bacteria that feed on say gasses/chemicals less abundant or important in their world running wild in on ours being over-saturated with whatever.

If it was that easy, something on Earth would already be doing it.

Man there were suicides because of the rapture scare and 2012. Hell wasn't there some crazy lady who killed her kids so they wouldn't be on earth for the apocalypse?

Nothing, user. Nothing at all.

If it was so easy to do so something would have evolved to eat Dodo's before man.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wow!_signal
>Implying we haven't already encountered aliens

Might not be viable for life on earth, not properly just a sudden boom in reproduction, a feeding frenzy and then dying out in short order.

Read as NFL at first, imagined bloodbowl but with more aliens

Prey we run into some benevolent race first? Also, hope we weren't their genetic experiments and now they're coming to claim what's theirs.

It's what Zimbabwe was called when it was run by white people and was literally the best country of Africa.

>How would we react?

Due deference, secure peace treaty, then trade/barter/buy/steal every bit of technology we can.

I wasn't aware there were so many racists on Veeky Forums.

...

> Posters point out the truth
> get called rwaaaayciss for noticing reality

Well done.