Can we all just take a moment and panic that Portals to Other Planes are a thing again and New Phyrexia is going to...

For many, many, MANY players, (New) Phyrexians were/are a new thing.

>which is saying something because Yawgmoth was mostly just pissy that he never got to be a planeswalker.

And getting cucked out of ruling Dominaria.

Okay, that's fair, I honestly didn't think of it that way.

Even so, I'm hoping if we have to revisit New Phyrexia it stays contained to the corpse of Mirrodin.

>Plus their motivations are a lot more juvenile than Yawgmoth's were

It's appropriate, because they're basically children. Add to that the fact they don't really even know there are other planes out there and it explains their lack of scope.

Elesh Norn, official winner of the Mirrodinbowl, wants to save the world by uniting it as one. She's pretty much finished up with that on the only world she knows about.

>She's pretty much finished up with that on the only world she knows about.

Wrong.

Nope!

>markrosewater.tumblr.com/post/58493418500/im-curious-do-you-think-return-to-new-phyrexia
>I’m pretty sure we’ll see the Phyrexians again but I’m not sure it will be on New Phyrexia.

Not looking forward to it.

At the very least Kamigawa will be safe, cause we aren't ever going back there.

There's hundreds of other Pyrexia controlled planes, like the dead white chick on Theros's home plane.

We're probably going to get a Neo Kamigawa in two to five years or so, since creative has been recently asking what people actually want to see there if we ever return.

Please don't hurt me with such awful lies. Kamigawa is buried safely in the past.

Can phyrexian kamigawa be the next one announced? Like go full Shadowrun, magic's take on cyberpunk, just like kaladesh is "magic's take on steampunk?"

I assume by "Neo Kamigawa" they mean a plane that is to Kamigawa what Innistrad was to Ulgrotha. Similar premise, all new, streamlined presentation.

>"Neo Kamigawa"

I thought Tarkir was Neo Kamigawa

>I thought Tarkir was Neo Kamigawa
Laotian? So, are you Chinese or are you Japanese?

Tarkir was more overlapping cultures of mainland Asia than Japan.

Sheoldred more like Sheoldead

The key word there is "if." She's willing to invade other worlds, but she doesn't know for sure that they exist. Remember that the Gitaxians are twisted fucks that probably spout nonsense.

>dead white chick on Theros
Elspeth's home plane could be cool. Or again, any of the planes that Phyrexia managed to take hold on. The problem with that is access to other colors. Remember that Old Phyrexia was really black and that New Phyrexia allowed it to venture into other colors, so the new set with Phyrexia would have to find an excuse for nonblack colors to exist if it doesn't take place on New Phyrexia.

Tarkir is Central Asia to China to Southeast Asia, not Nipland.

>whats the point of bringing back awesome villains from the past
You shouldn't do this to begin with. It does nothing but cheapen the villain and make them retroactively worse.

Asian culture is asian culture.

CHINESE OR JAPANESE?

Asian

I want to fuck Elesh norn

IS THAT CHINESE OR JAPANESE?

Its Asian.

I'm sad the eldrazi are fully dead, and we'really never gonna see them attack mirrodin, the massive brawl of horrors, and and the ensuing phyrexdrazi as each tries to assimilate the other.

Neither Sheoldred or Urabrask are confirmed dead. You know what they say about unconfirmed deaths of fictional characters.

Wizard's motivation for bringing back Phyrexians was explicitly because they were a beloved villain from the past. Their entire reason for existing is that Wizards thought that old players would be excited about seeing them make a return.

Nevermind that Bolas filled the same niche with the exception of his story actually ending on a cliffhanger in Time Spiral.

They have Emrakul stuck in a giant silver prison.
You know what's important about silver in Magic lore? It can be sent through time.

I thought they were. Hm. Well, let's expect internal turmoil in New Phyrexia 2: Phyrexia in the City.

Could be korean, or a certain breed of steppe-living horsefuckers.

Pic related

>Mirrodin died thanks to that parasite
It didn't die it just got an upgrade.

>certain breed of steppe-living horsefuckers.

So Eldrazi?

Mongol hordes are not weebs trash.

...

Oh. Oh dear.

I think I finally am starting to see an inkling of Bolas's plan.

>one Asian culture is better then another because that one had more exposure

There are equally Asian to me.

Puny Mongol hordes cannot defeat mighty Japanese samurai.

Sweden and France are both equally European to me. What's your point?

Why is Japanese culture considered trash?

>The Eldrazi titan Emrakul willingly let herself be sealed in Innistrad's moon, after telling Jace that she "didn't want to play anymore" and "It was not her time. Not yet."
>yet
>>>>>>>>YET

We gonna go borgdrazi? Come back from the future with corrupted anything fused with freakytech?

It isn't inherently, weebs are.

Aren't you a weeb?

The Japanese obsession with a pants-on-head honor system has served to hold them back to a degree. Other than that, it's pretty much just the weebs, yeah.

>Emrakul is sealed inside Innistrad's moon

>In magic, the only thing that can time travel is silver

>The Kaladesh planeswalking device can only transport inanimate objects

>Innistrad's moon is made of silver
>A moon is an inanimate object

>inb4 Bolas's ultimate plan is to merge Karn with Innistrad's moon.

Sure, but what does Bolas's get out of that?

>It didn't die it just got an upgrade.
Time for a terrible card.

>Phyrexian Terminator (2PP)

>Artifact Creature- Shapeshifter Horror

>Changeling, Haste

>Whenever ~ dies you may pay BPBP and sacrifice a creature that shares a type with it, if you do, put ~ onto the battlefield tapped and attacking.

>"It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with... It doesn't feel 'pity', or 'remorse', or 'fear'! And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead! "

>5/5

Add some slivers in there too while we're at it, so assimilation boosts all of them at once.

How far before these are just the zerg?

>Bolas has been around for [n]illions of years
>gets foiled by heroes almost every time
>his plans have degraded to the point that he no longer gets anything out of them, he just wants them to succeed

Wait, so this means we have a reality-warping tentacle monster we can TaRDiS FedEx to any point in time, space, or multiverse.

The only question then is where.

I CAN'T EVEN MAKE TOAST AROUND THESE CRETINS WITHOUT IT GOING HAYWIRE AND I'M A FLIPPING DRAGON

The next set is called Aether Revolt which clearly has nothing to do with Phyrexia.

It's almost definitely going to be about Bolas/Tezzeret fucking over Kaladesh's energy source, likely draining it to Amonkhet for Bolas' own machinations, causing chaos on the plane but ultimately not destroying it.

I'm sure Phyrexia will pay a visit down the line but not for awhile.

>Pay 5 Energy, Die Young your PT.
>Okay, sac a Changeling, PT returns tapped and attacking.
>This is my second Main Phase.
>I don't care.
>... Can I block?
>Is it your Declare Blocker's step?
>No?
>Then no, take 5.
>But it's not the damage step either!
>Fair call, gamestate keeps checking that PT is hitting you then.
>...
>Pass?
>... Pass, I guess.
>Cool. Untap, draw, go to combat. No attackers. Gamestate checked PT's hit you about 24 times now. Take 120.
>What the fuck man stop bringing your coding bullshit into this.

>enemy bolts it during his own attack phase
>dies, sacs it's buddy, enters tapped and attacking.
>but he was attacking too
>so who goes first?
Could I make it be you, so you have to attack with it, I don't block, so then it's tapped and can't block, and I can swing for bigger without worrying about it being chumped?

>Be Nicol Bolas
>Decide to make myself some breakfast
>The moment I turn it all on, four whippersnappers come in, beat the shit out of me, melt my automatic bread slicing and toasting whachamawhozit and steal my hard boiled egg before buggering off again with a cry of "Go superfriends!"
>Next thing I know one of my more stupid minions has come in and started gesticulating at me and producing unintelligible dragon noises.
I hate my life.

>Be Nicol Bolas
>Been away from Jacetice league for nearly 8 years
>Found a cozy Egyptian plane to conquer
>Start working towards my ultimate goal of gaining my full power again
>Immediately puts me in contact with the Jacetice League again despite the infinitely low probability

This poor Dragon has no luck whatsoever

Well at leas he hasn't gone full Pterry yet, so that's a plus.

I'm gonna need sauce on that silver property, user.

That's how Karn was made. Urza was experimenting to send shit back in time, and silver was the only thing that survived so he made a whole golem out of silver. Just look up Karn on salvation wiki.

LONG AGO IN A DISTANT LAND, I, NICOL BOLAS, THE FOREVER SERPENT OF DARKNESS, EMBODIED UNSPEAKABLE EVIL!
BUT A FOOLISH BARBARIAN WARRIOR, WELDING A MULTIVERSIAL MENDING STEPPED FORTH TO OPPOSE ME.

NOW I SEEK TO RETURN TO THE PAST, WHERE MY EVIL WAS LAW. BEFORE THE FINAL BLOW IS STRUCK I WILL TEAR OPEN A PORTAL IN TIME, FLINGING AN ELDRAZI INTO THE PAST, RETURNING ME TO A FUTURE THAT.. IS.. BOOLAAAAS.

Explain Sarkhan Vol

Maybe silver is the only non-living substance that can pass through? Look it up.

[Dragon Noises]

Sarkhan Vol made of silver confirmed

>Be Nicol Bolas
>Christmas is coming up
>go into town to buy a bunch of Christmas cards to send out to my Legions
>go to a newsagents
>buy a few multipacks, and a nice pen
>that hooded douchebag walks in carrying a little statue he made
>he's been taking evening classes
>he's come into buy wrapping paper for the statue that he fucking made, BY HAND
>sees me
>"Stop foul tyrant!"
>destroys half of my cards
I fucking hate that guy.

>You know what they say about unconfirmed deaths of fictional characters
The same as they say about confirmed deaths.

Wizards creative team mismanaging their one job.

Can we take a moment to reflect on the fact that we got a great new artifact plane and Artificer Jesus is dead?

>For example, only objects made of silver could pass through the time portals created by Urza Planeswalker—a restriction that doesn't apply here because the time portal was created naturally, by Ugin's death, rather than artificially.
Literally the first result when googling how Sarkhan could travel through time.

the worst part is he got sacrificed to the absolute worst walker ever.
i hate karn so god damn much

>A character explicitly stated to be dead

I think the revolt is just going to be some sort of class riot or tech turning against everyone.

I'm fairly certain Tezzeret is only in this block to steal the portal technology.

It'll be class related shit. This is Left Wing: the Block. Remember goy, intelligent, hard working people who keep the world turning are your enemy!

imagine all the shit flinging that will happen in kaladesh

And you are /pol/: The Idiot who sees some conspiracy in everything.

Fund it.

>whats the point of bringing back awesome villains from the past if you are not going to use them?

The issue lies in bringing them back at all. After years with the Weatherlight Saga and the leadup to Invasion, and then Invasion itself, the Phyrexian story arc was played out to its natural conclusion. I was looking forward to seeing what was going to happen next, what the "new" arc was going to be.

That's nice. I don't care. The Phyrexian story arc was over and done with. If new players wanted to get them that badly they could buy the old books and cards or something.

He was a white male. Can't have too many of those running around. Especially when they're not villains.

Remember when the Borg were actually threatening?