What's it like to kill a Space Marine?

What's it like to kill a Space Marine?

That depends on what you are.

Loud. And extremely enjoyable.

To kill a Space marine is to kill a guardian of man-kind. To watch a hero die a dishonorable death. To see them fight valiently, yet die all the same. To see a champion vanish under a volly of plasma, his passion scorched away. To see a Astartes recoil in shock, as he feels a knife plunge into his heart, like as if death had caught him by surprise. To see their wounded, fighting on, despite their limbs hacked off, and their guts spilled, their only weapon their, booming, hate filled voices as they are crushed under treads.

One does not take pity on Space Marines; but one must ask, how does a flock turn on its shepards?

last tuseday

You don't.

More trouble than it's worth.

because 40k suuuucks aaaaaasssssssss

/thread

Spikey space marines are also space marines.

WHAT IN THE EMPEROR'S NAME DID YOU JUST SPEAK UNTO ME, YOU VILE HERETIC?!
BASE CUR, KNOW THAT I WAS THE MIGHTIEST INITIATE AT THE TRIAL OF CHOOSING, AND HAVE TAKEN PART IN MANY CRUSADES AGAINST THE EMPEROR'S ENEMIES, WITH MORE THAN 3,000 VILE XENOS DEAD TO MY NAME! I AM PEERLESS IN SKILL WITH THE CHAINSWORD, AND MY AIM IS AS TRUE AS ANY WARRIOR IN THE CHAPTER!
YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME BUT ANOTHER HERETIC TO BE SCOURGED! I WILL EXTERMINATE YOU WITH A FURY THAT HAS NOT BEEN WITNESSED SINCE THE DAYS OF THE PRIMARCHS, MARK IT WELL!
YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN SPEW YOUR VILE BLASPHEMIES, MERELY BECAUSE WE COMMUNICATE VIA NOOSPHERIC LINK?! THINK AGAIN, TRAITOR! THIS VERY MOMENT, MY CONTACTS ACROSS ALL THE HOLY ORDOS OF THE INQUISITION ARE USING THE MOST ADVANCED FORMS OF PSYCHIC SCRYING TO DETERMINE WHAT VILE HOLE YOU CONCEAL YOURSELF, SO MAKE YOUR PEACE AND REPENT BEFORE THE EMPEROR, FOR A STORM IS COMING! A STORM OF WRATH THAT WILL PURGE YOUR SOUL!
YOUR DEATH NEARS VERMIN!
I CAN STRIKE AT YOU FROM EVERY SHADOW, AND REND YOUR FLESH IN OVER 800 WAYS WITH MY BARE FISTS ALONE! NOT ONLY DOES MY CHAINSWORD THIRST FOR YOUR BENIGHTED FLESH, I SHALL SPILL FORTH THE VERY WEAPON VAULTS OF MARS AND USE THOSE ANCIENT AND PUISSANT DEVICES TO WIPE YOUR WRETCHED EXISTENCE FROM THE FACE OF THE COSMOS!
IF YOU HAD ONLY KNOW THE WRATH OF MANKIND WOULD DESCEND UPON YOU, THEN PERHAPS YOU MIGHT HAVE REPENTED YOUR SINS AND PURIFIED YOURSELF! YET YOU COULD NOT, YOU DID NOT, AND NOW YOU SHALL REAP THE REWARDS OF YOUR DARK DEEDS YOU FOOLISH XENO-LOVER! I WILL DRENCH YOU IN BLESSED PROMETHIUM AND DROWN YOU IN YOUR OWN VILE JUICES! YOU ARE DEAD HERETIC!

...

>Slaanesh and Khorne fighting alongside

What chaotic heresy is this?

I fucking love that look so damn much.

Fuck you

Hey, fuck you leatherman!

I dont know about everyone else, but its always been a bit chaotic for me.

>as he feels a knife plunge into his heart
I wonder what it feels like to find out that space marines have two hearts and acidic saliva at the same time

wut

>to find out that space marines have two hearts and acidic saliva at the same time

Oh god I fucking love this. Some guy thinks he's hot shit for catching a Space Marine out of the armor, was already prepared for the ribs that resist small arms fire, stabs into the heart and then gets a face-full of spit.

I bet them marine boys wouldnt survive an hour on Catachan

>hairband instead of bandanna
>needs to wear gloves
>isn't even wearing a sleeveless jacket
fuck off faker

>mfw those hips

Pretty sure they can.

...

Hey, hair keeps the skinmites off ya. I'm from catachan and I know a fuckin native, so say that to my face and not over the vox. S'why I style for the rambo look myself. Why don't you balance a mono-edge on yer calloused fingers, or are you some sorta' Cadian faggot?

>not wearing a bandanna
>probably still has gloves on
>feeble, cadian arms
yeah I doubt they've ever even seen catachan, let alone landed on it

Find jeez

was that really so hard?

>needing to prove how bad-ass your world is
>75% casualties prior to meeting the enemy in battle
>not holding the Cadian Gate against all the forces of Chaos
Go back to your dueling banjos Cata-chan.

FUN

Well lets see

I type in Female Catachan and I get a couple results.

Though I hate FFGs female catachan your telling me you make a fucking ripley clone yet in the same movie series Vasquez was the perfect choice

>Its the Cadians whine about muh Cadian gate episode

Absolutely Harem

Are they less the Emprah's sheppards of Man for falling?

It only means that they have survived the rejection.

>hair
>fewer parasites
pick one

>Are they less the Emprah's sheppards of Man for falling?
>For killing man
Yes?

Hey guys are we having regiment wars? I would like to say the Death korps of Kreig are pretty shit since their fucking artillery teams seem to not know the term of DANGER CLOSE.

>HOLY DICKS I ACTUALLY DID IT
>I AM KING THICKDICK OF FUCK MOUNTAIN
>HIS MATES ARE COMING TO RIP ME A NEW ONE BUT FUCK THEM
>THEY CAN'T UNFUCK THE GUY I JUST KILLED
>YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAA--

If you think a shepard never has to kill members of the flock, I laugh at your naivety.

I dont understand? You are supposed to feel when you take out the trash?

Okay, sure but I think you got my point.
CSM have forsaken humanity.

>melee troops
>S3

...

I don't think they're fighting together, so much as scrambling towards the same targets.

Easy like Sunday morning

That isn't Xiombarg.

Like the best high you've ever had, and better than sex. I ejaculate every time.
Pic Related, it's me

not posting this in caps
you had one job
you are shitty fucking noise marine

WHO LET DOOMRIDER ON THE VOX

Same as when crushing a bug underfoot.

When's the last time you had to fight over your desert planet Al-Halluf? We have stopped the advance of Chaos consistently for 10,000 years. We made the Despoiler into an armless failure. We are still exporting soldiers across the galaxy because we don't need all of them to hold the line at home.

Isn't your head mounted on some White Scar's lodge-pole, still alive, meaning you are stuck there? What a bitch way to go.

No no no, we cant kill them! We must out wit them with our superior intellect, and than steal their primarch! Nyeh heh heh!

SUCH A FUCKING RUSH!!!

>Nyeh heh heh
Now imagining Necron Lord Papyrus, insistent on destroying his enemies with fiendish traps and puzzles, while also feeding them alien "delicacies."

>loud bang
>Shockwave
>Ground rumbles

That's about it.

Pitiful.
In another world they may have been heroes. They posses an earnest belief that they are the defenders of humanity, and the courage to die for that belief. How little they know about the truth of the ermperium.
tl;dr there are no good guys in 40k everyone is a dick

Do humans and eldars ever have sex ?
Can space marines have sex?

Yes
No

Yes, there are half-Eldar in earlier editions
Yes they are capable, but the brainwashing they go through means the vast majority of them never will

Is there porn of such practice?

The forces of Chaos *do* work together sometimes, even the ones that hate each other. It's just rare. Black Legion does it the most, but there are plenty of instances of it happening. Heck, back when Chaos Undivided was a thing that was their whole shtick.

It's the internet, of course there is.
Most of it is gay though. Like actually gay, Space Marines fucking Space Marines

rule 34 newfag
lurk moar

>be Khornate
>see a bunch of pansy loyalists fighting some filthy daemonettes
>target_rich_environment.pict

I still don't get how Chaos Undivided isn't a thing. The Word Bearers still exist and all.

They're the one group that the God's agree to just let them worship everybody. Basically the Chaos equivalent of an embassy.

So does anyone else who tries to worship all four just die? I don't get it.

it's just one of those really stupid retcons most sensible people ignore because it raises more questions than answers

This picture inspired a whole campaign oddly enough. Its a great one.

>You can tell by the way I walk I'm a Crusadin' man, no time to talk.

It's incredibly stupid and I get angry when I think about it too much.
I *thiiiink* you basically just don't get as much power/can't ascend.
So you can pray to the Gods of Chaos, do sacrifices to them, make dark bargains with daemons etc, and you might get some mutations or some artifacts or whatever, but you won't become a Daemon Prince or get any of the *really* juicy stuff until you start worshiping only one god.
It's truly dumb and it makes Chaos less fun and interesting than it used to be.

10/10 most realistic depiction

>I AM KING THICKDICK OF FUCK MOUNTAIN

It's like you speak to my soul

yes

This is the most accurate description of a cultist/gretchin reaction and it needs to be turned into an actual thing included in a fluff.

If the people near the barrel don't need to plug their ears, then there is no reason for the guys at the back to. If they, instead, started heaving the next round onto the elevator right after it comes back down again, it seems to me the rate of fire would increase by at least 75%

...

>space marine gets back up and shanks you in the back as you celebrate

>thinking you can kill a Space Marine

People suddenly thinking that a Mark not existing and the option to make a Daemon Prince one means that Chaos Undivided no longer exists, this is false.

If you're Chaos Undivided you either simply don't get any special Mark or you worship one of the gods more than the others and thus get their Mark.

It's only dumb to the people who think they should be able to worship the gods as a pantheon and expect them all to bestow a portion of their power, despite the fact that it's repeatedly stated that the gods despise each other and only rarely all work together.

It's only dumb to the people who are okay with an individual obtaining the backing of all four gods being a dime a dozen thing instead of rarity and a sign of particularly potent individual.

You say it makes Chaos less interesting, I'd say it makes it a lot more interesting for the inherent tensions that can exist within a squad or Warband. The Night Lords novels by ADB cover this excellently with the one character in the main squad who has devoted himself to Khorne.

This.

It's the most underrated post in the thread.

>To see a Astartes recoil in shock, as he feels a knife plunge into his heart,
He doesn't recoil in shock. He rips your head off because that's a fleshwound.

It's enjoyable to hear their girl-like screams once the melta or the blade kicks in

>Not killing a space marine so hard that his flailing body attempts to turn into a helicopter and escape the planet
Does the Codex Astartes support this maneuver?

rule34.paheal.net
Welcome to a world of wonder, friend

>They have two hearts!
You also have two lungs, but if one stops working you're in big trouble.
The second heart is just that he doesn't die when the first one stops working, he still needs immediate Apothecary attention.

Euphoric.

In that instant, you are enlightened, not by the blessings of a false Emperor, but by you own arete.

I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER ALL THE DRUGS I'VE TAKEN

>be in a battle
>kind of boring, do some drugs to crank this shit up
>do too much drugs, forget what you were doing
>reach for the nearest blowjob dispenser
>"Oh baby, I love when you do it rough"
>once drugs wear off, realise you have to replace one of your penises
Such is life as a Haemonculus

Can you believe the monkeigh STILL don't have warmasks?

>I5/6
>WS5/6 in formation
>Implying you'll even get overwatch
>Or an armour save

I'll see you in CC sweetheart. Try not to have too many feelings.

That looks like a girl...

If I remember right, one of the Inquisitor Czevak novels described a marines deathcry as "unmanly" as he was torn apart by a Harlequin's kiss.

I think even a Marine can be excused for screaming once 100 meters of monofilament suddenly uncoil in your chest.

>I'll see you in CC sweetheart
Bitch please if something lives to make to CC, it's only because I want the joy of smashing it with Deathwing Knights.

God damn it feels good to be a Dark Angel these days.

>be Ork
>be da biggest, and Da strongest
>Well, not yet, but sumday!

>Boyz pilin in
>Sum of dem tin can umies
>Givin us a roight poundin
> Ruzzgob and Nazrag bite it.
>Dazgad. Lugnut. Oorgit.
>Nidgad. Ragthump. Ole Bitey
>Jagrum. Rugman. Zagthog.

>Ooh! My turn now!
>Rev me choppa,, go for the guts
>It bites true as the Muhreens knifin Gibbrik

>Oize da winna!
> Take helmet as trophy
>Wear it as a shoulder pad
>Even Nob Vargod is jealous.
>'es only got three boyz left, and one of ems dead ard!

If you're not willing to shell your own position, you're not willing to win.

The Deathmasque or Deathwatch has this happening. IIRC a Harlequin expertly stabs a Space Wolf through his heart and thinks that's that. But he just stabs her with a knife through her throat and drives it all the way through her brain.

>wheeeeere the fuck is your neophyyyyyte?

Worshipping Chaos Undivided is still a thing. Only Undivided Princes have been retconned

Killing an elephant with only your balls and wits with you.