In this thread we post cursed items that are in poor taste

>Would you become trans if your sex was switched?

You wouldn't suffer any sort of gender dysphoria or mental distress if you suddenly became a woman?

>Take it to /b/ or /pol/.

/thread.

I don't think I would, no.

I'm sure it would shapeshift your brain chemistry as well assuming it was a true transformation

From the perspective of the cursed person, the effects would probably mostly be the same. However, the girdle changing your body will have more obvious side effects.

It's "turns out my brother is trans" vs. "there's this crazy hobo chick that keeps saying she's my brother".

Girlde costs you your identity, driver's licence, friends, all that shit. But on the other hand, exactly that might be useful if you need to go into hiding.

Ah, the vaunted "No True Transformation" fallacy!

Not really, i'd enjoy all the emotional support i'd never had and life would generally be vastly easier on me as i'm not above using whatever looks and physical charms i have to get an easy job. Only thing i'd hate would be the sudden lack of musclemass i'm accustomed to and the periods.

... Oh god.

A magic item that fixes your current problems, but makes you yearn for your previous condition.

If you're ugly now you'll probably be ugly as a woman.

Have you never see/read genderbending fiction?

inb4 "GM fiat"

.... Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

Being a women isn't a get out of jail free card

Never said it was but i get all the shoulders to cry on i want, people will rush to my aid in situations that i can make myself seem a victim in, and shit like easy secretary work is literally handed to you.
I'd be down for casual flirts and skimpy outfits for a sit on my ass job and free drinks at bars.

>Unsteady broomstick
Makes flying a challenge.

meanwhile, in reality
articles.baltimoresun.com/1991-06-16/news/1991167033_1_pms-richter-defense

>Chitinous Gauntlets of Eternal Masterbation

>I'd be down for casual flirts and skimpy outfits for a sit on my ass job and free drinks at bars.
you want to be a woman just so you can be a whore? what skimpy outfits would you wear?

>eternal master baition
Fixed.

>Being a women isn't a get out of jail free card
It quite literally is
huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/11/men-women-prison-sentence-length-gender-gap_n_1874742.html

Whatever got me the most privvies and hottest fucks, also whatever lesbians are into i suppose.
See? This shit right here. A literal get out of jail free card. They can't even prove she didn't have a period at or prior to the stop and asking for some form of verification is considered sexual harassment. I could literally fuck up a police officer, cry, and get off scott free.

>Doorknob of Forgetfulness

makes you forget the last thing you intended to do as you turn and push the knob.

I like when cursed items have some use. Could you make a better tasting one by crafting it out of pineapple or something?

bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13666066
>Women should not be sent to prison and should instead serve community sentences, according to a new report by the Women's Justice Taskforce.
>The Ministry of Justice (MoJ) welcomed the report and said it was carefully considering the recommendations.

Not necessarily cursed, but:
>leather armor made from woven and then hardened foreskin collected from the enemy

Don't they make beauty formulas out of foreskins? So I get to wear it and when I get back to town after a hard day fighting orcs my skin is smooth as a baby?

Oh, it's definitely cursed. The dead do not forgive such acts of cruelty.

Once per day plus at every erection, the wearer must make a will save or suffer as if they had priapism for 1d6 hours. Women and other beings experience phantom pain.

>The dead
What if they survived?

>This shit right here. A literal get out of jail free card.
Not always. I mean
>an Englishwoman accused of murder was convicted of a reduced charge of manslaughter in 1979.
You still go to prison for manslaughter.

Yes and no. They sell the foreskins to beauty companies cause thats free, and often fresh and therefore full of stem cells, collagen. Now the hospitals get more money and the beauty companies can use words like "all natural". Just making an armor out of any old foreskin won't do jackshit but maybe smell a little different when tanned.
D-did you take this from the one damn time i wrote a greentext about Destroya, my female sperglord of a friends sad highschool entry into lesbianism and man hating?

I think most of that is sympathetic magic thinking. You get foreskins from babies so you get baby soft skin. Same logic driving the use of placentas for similar purposes.

Myths I'm drawing from are more warlike. If there's a curse on this one it probably has more to do with kingship and madness, though might also be on the right track with the restless dead angle.

The socks n leggings dont fit her costume well and that bothers me.

> ring of stiffness
Hardens anx material its put on,
It's 3 thumbs wide in diameter

Please see
Placentas are also full of free and natural collagen and as a bonus, tasty stem cells.

Just rubbing stem cells on your face won't make you younger, user. Futurama is not a legitimate medical or scientific journal.

I know. Beauty companies want the collagen, science wants the stem cells. Highest bidder wins.
Either way your babies foreskin and placenta get auctioned off.

Collagen has similar problems. Your body doesn't really do anything with collagen just sitting on your skin. If it worked anything like that you'd be better off using the tons and tons of it we get from the bones of slaughtered animals. You could just rub elmer's glue or gelatin mix all over yourself or something.

The marketing gimmick revolves around associations with youth, not anything with a legitimate scientific basis.

Either way they're selling human body parts using beauty as a justifiable excuse.

*Men's body parts
As far as women are concerned, men are barely even human.

>Orb of the false chef

A small orb that tastes looks and tastes like candy, user must make a will save to not swallow it immidiately. Once swallowed, it remains in the victims stomach, completely removing the abillity to tell tastes appart.

It was sometimes used by spys or assasins to infiltrate a noble's kitchen or make them unaware to poisons.

Just put a sticky on the door before opening it.

No wonder so many guys are opting for traps instead.

Not gonna lie. It's literally half the bullshit and 80% of the drama gone and if you tell them to cut the bullshit and/or drama they usually do rather than try to throw it all back in your face and double down like a child. Conversion does take some getting used to, though at the end of the day it basically amounts to the same bathroom clutter just different objects being the clutter.

Just let it be man. You can't compete with those mgtows that think women are literally succubi who use their vaginas to inject mind-control drugs into men's penises.

>I like when cursed items have some use. Could you make a better tasting one by crafting it out of pineapple or something?
Probably. Of course, it already has a use, due to the high-quality spermatozoa it is full of!

ring of disgust, it makes food taste terrible

Hey it's back for revenge!

what's it like? tell the story.

Bullshit. The ones I've talked to were all insufferable faggots and most of those on Veeky Forums are butthurt attention whores.
With chicks you, at least usually, quickly realize how tiresome/nagging/bitching each one is and act accordingly with her.

>insufferable faggots
how? i try to be good. maybe you just met bad apples? did you meet them off /soc/ or something?

Not much to tell.
Pads and tampons are replacdd by enema kits usually and makeup is more or less the same volume.
Gaffs take the place of bras in the laundry.
Most are just plain happy someone is treating them like nornal hence the immediate cut down on bullshit and drama so as not to scare you off.
Dedicated types usually stick to specific diets so sex usually a quick 2 minutes break to the bathroom for prep so its not much adjustment there.
Positions are a tad different but again easy to adjust to.
If they're MTF and in hormones 9/10 they're pretty horny when you get them going which is apparenty just a part of the side effects.
Oddly enough 70% of the time their dick doesn't even come in to play as most don't like it being touched cause it's basically a constant reminder of what they're not and physical sensations from it tend to upset them. The other 30% want the same shit your average guy wants when it comes to the D.
Not sure if its just how guys/traps are or if it goes back to that reduced drama but i've never met one who wouldn't make an immediate compromise on something if they knew it upset you whereas plenty of girls i've met will absolutely not budge even halfway if it means they aren't getting exactly what they want.
Most are bro-tier friends in the day to day.
Avoid gay club types for the most part as they are in fact attention whores and not relationship material as such.
Where did you meet them? Clubs and gay bar traps tend to be that way but those met "in the wild" tend to be plenty level headed and willing to make shit work like a functioning relationship should.

>bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13666066
Article's half a decade old, stellar proof.

meant the story of how you met, started dating, how the relationship went, what it was like together, etc.

>anything that didn't happen yesterday isn't valid
You're going to have some awkward conversations with war vets and stock brokera.

Naw, I've been out doing other stuff.

Nice to know there's a clone of sorts around.

Given that user wasn't bitching about having to go to jail, taking my statement literally is really fuckin' dumb.

>gets completely and utterly BTFO
>I d-didn't really mean what I said! You guys are dumb!

>feminist gets four posts disproving his point
>cherrypicks one to reply to
>complains it happened a single election ago

Nah, gay dating/hookup sites. And in the end I realized that all the bullshit and faggotry they bring isn't worth it, so I buried my thoughts of experimenting.

You're all clones.

...

Thats 4 long greentexts i'd rather not write up.
Met 3 through a friend and 1 in a book store.
Basic relationship stuff though i admit to the old highschool vices of names, handholding, cuddling, walking around with someone hanging off my arm or hand, cuddling up watching tv, and casual spooning so just augment "normal adult relationship" with those. I've been told its sickeningly cute or "loveydovey" at times.
Why'd we break up? I live in a college town and they leave for some reason like summer break or a semester off and longterm relationships NEVER seem to last for one reason or another.
Still seeing the bookstore one who's actually working as a librarian so theres plenty of jokes there and she's even thinking of just living in town so thats a good sign.
How were the relationships? pretty good. It's a college town so plenty of shit to do together or with friends so nothing dull. I've always been nice during breakups as being salty just caused undue hurt to the other party which tends to make them be gentle about it to, though i do tend to pick laidback types apparently according to opinion so maybe that helped.

>Protip: a literal get out of jail free card is necessarily also a metaphorical get out of jail free card.

Avoid those. You pick up bad straight people of either gender and straight most of the time so why would it be otherwise for those of the homosexual persuasion?
Try through friends and casual dating or as i refer to it "in the wild" IE just around town. See one if the coffee shop? Try chatting them up, worst that happens is a total stranger you'll probably never see again thinks you're weird.

>I've been told its sickeningly cute or "loveydovey" at times.
wow who's actually working as a librarian so theres plenty of jokes there
what jokes!

Sexy librarian jokes.
She wears the whole stocking and garter with skirt get up just to fuck with people cause it's a college town so no minors to scar and the gaff's i mentioned earlier hide any possible bulge so most just assume she's a washboard chick. Flats cause she can't do heels.

>>did you meet them off /soc/ or something?
>Nah, gay dating/hookup sites.
So "Yes, even worse actually"

>She wears the whole stocking and garter with skirt get up just to fuck with people
being a girl must be such fun.

No, that's the problem. That's why it's a curse.
You're a man who still wants to be a man, but is now a woman.
The whole point is that it's made to change you into something you don't want to be.

As an aside, Pathfinder realized this was kind of transphobic, and has it said that some people seek out the 'curse' intentionally. It's also no longer called cursed.

Dysphoria is not liking your body. Being transgender is just having dysphoria related to gender.
There's also body dysmorphia, which is unrelated to gender, and involves feeling that you have one too many limbs, or that your face is wrong. There's also Cotard's Delusion, where you feel like you're dead or otherwise not real.

Even manly man Thor and Loki became beautiful crossdressers.

Oh God, why did I bother including insight, I should have read further to see how the thread became super /pol/-y

>No, that's the problem. That's why it's a curse.
>You're a man who still wants to be a man, but is now a woman.
>The whole point is that it's made to change you into something you don't want to be.
uh

get off your high horse.
>"oh boo hoo, someone proved a 'women have it so bad' shitposter wrong!"

Any time Veeky Forums says "I wouldn't be bothered", you can generally assume they're wrong.
Veeky Forums is bothered by everything. Case in point

>my views are right and anyone who says otherwise is lying

Yeah but thats just their day to day shit. It gets weird when you remember loki not only crossdressed but crosspecied, got raped by a horse just so his dad didn't have to pay the Not!HomeDepotMexican, got knocked up, then had his dad ride mount his new baby to his chariot, and rides it around all the time just to remind loki what a fuck up he is. And thats STILL a normal day in their life.

>Veeky Forums is bothered by everything. Case in point
FTFY

>got raped by a horse
Bullshit, he was like, literally asking for it. The horse did nothing wrong.

You must be pretty butthurt about being proven wrong, huh.

Well yeah, but as far as I'm aware, there was no shapeshifting magic involved in their crossdressing escapade.

They've turned i to women before. Not sure if that still counts as crossdressing. If i told my daughter to go seduce a violent and strong as piss black dude or else i'd break her skull on my new fence i refuse to pay for i'm sure she'd say she felt raped.

user, people linked articles about women getting less harsh sentences compared to men. That's basically low hanging fruit, and something that a lot of feminists would actually like to see corrected. While MRAs and MGTOWs love to pull out the "Pussy Pass", it doesn't really outweigh the systemic sexism, discrimination, sexual harassment, rape, and other such things that women are disproportionately subject to.
But whenever I link thirty or so examples of how, for instance, discrimination exists within STEM fields (as opposed to "women just don't want those jobs"), I tend to get banned for "off topic".

They told Loki to figure out how they could weasel out of their deal with the Master Builder.
Loki's the one who decided he should get fucked by the horse to accomplish that.
>Then they kill the Builder anyway, so Loki got deep dicked and knocked up for no reason

They made loki do SOMETHING cause they literally told him they'd kill his ass if he didn't unfuck them. So he found a way to redirect the fucking.
How else was he supposed to stop him? The dudes stallion was the only reason he even made the deadline what else could loki have done beyond banging the dude as a chick (already been done and we don't got enough prose in our edda for 80 crossdressing scenes.) for 3 days.

>That's basically low hanging fruit, and something that a lot of feminists would actually like to see corrected.
You are so full of shit.

I'm trans, and from what I've seen he's right. The only people that don't want equality and would rather see women reign supreme are extremist idiots, in my experience.

D-did Loki at least enjoy himself?

Cursed weed or reality perception.
youtube.com/watch?v=Kt_7Xoz5y88

He got raped up the ass with a horsecock, what do you think?

>He got raped up the ass with a horsecock, what do you think?
Loki was a female horse and he gave birth to Sleipnir afterwards.

>The whole point is that it's made to change you into something you don't want to be.
Actually, it's cursed because it's disguised as a belt of giant's strength and the effect remains after removing the item.

I say again. The mechanical effect if the item has never even been a consideration for being considered cursed. It has always been exclusively because the item is a lie with irreversible effects.

Womb dagger.

Most people generally don't want to be changed into something because they put on a cursed belt.
It literally takes a deity to change you back. It's not changing genders that's the curse, it's BEING CHANGED AGAINST YOUR WILL. Which is why in Pathfinder for people who want to change genders, there's no problem (although the original version did have a 10% chance to make you sexless).

That's exactly what I said?

>Cursed waterskin of autism

That's exactly what *I* said.

>Ring of Jew Summoning

>that signature
it's the little details ...

Well I guess we know who drank from the Waterskin of Autism.

The Ring of Stupidity: You take a -10 to Int but you believe that you are smart and thus attempt to make knowledge checks on everything.