Slaanesh is scariest yet underpresented god. Khornates will outright kill you, Nurglites will AIDS you...

Is he, dare I say it, "our guy"?

>in fucking everything
Indeed.

Depends which aspect /mask the cults worship.

Yeah, that's true but I'm thinking of a super generic cult. Like your standard cult of Nyarlathotep. Not the Brotherhood of the Black Pharaoh/Bloody Tounge or your Churches of Starry Wisdom.

Didn't you do this thread like a week ago?

Refractory period is pretty short

Man, at least it's about now Nyarlathotep. Even though everything is actually about Nyarlathotep.

Pic related. It's Nyarlathotep.

Of course, how did you think Kenny was blessed (cursed) with the ability to have his parents resurrect him.

This could work in South Park canon as Cthulhu exists, and is best friends with Eric Cartman.

I am so having Cartman be the High Priest of Cthulhu in my next campaign.

user's that's actually canon.

Kenny's parents joined a cult of Cthulu (for the beer), and while they were drunk his mom had a ritual performed on her that makes Kenny effectively immortal as each time he dies he's born again at the same time.

His friends only see it as him having somehow survived, and partially just refuse belief. Either that or the curse screws with them.

This was explained in th Coon n Friends v Cthulu arc.

Why the fuck am I spouting the validity of South Park? Send help.

If it makes you feel better, I posted that picture of Kenny because I just watched those episodes and decided that Nyarlathotep decided to manifest himself as Kenny, while keep that knowledge from his own manifestation so he could enjoy the creature's suffering unable to understand or cope with what's happening to him.

And all that Mint Berry Crunch stuff?

Just another layer int he cosmic joke.

I really need to start bothering with South Park again.

I remember that. Shit was cash and so was that amazing Brazilian bastard. Yeah, that was an era when /tg was based and had quests.

If that tried to happened again on today's /TriggeredGamers...

yeah... i'd hit that with my power sword kill all demons!

I'd let it hit me

>Khorne corrupting a noble soldiers who just wants to protect the inoccent, untill he is turned to a mindless berzerker
>Nurgle tricks a small child, who is afraid of death and pain after his parents died of AIDS cancer, into serving him, eventually twisting him to be a Plague Bearer under the guise of helping other people
>Tzeentch steers a young and naive scientist to disregard the small chance of his research being weaponized, because the nonexistant risk is worth completing it faster and with greater capability to help people, ultimately laughing when the scientists is forced to watch his creation destroy the planet
Fuck you and your lack of imagination, just stay in the cancer smut threads and go circlejerk each other for validation

He's not saying what the gods will do to you, but what their worshippers will.

Which all your examples back up.

>Khornate kills ya dead
>Nurgle makes ya sick
>Tzeentch zaps ya

As if Slaneesh wouldn't derive pleasure from you thrusting your sword inside of it.

>He's not saying what the gods will do to you, but what their worshippers will.

>>Khornate kills ya dead
The smarter ones would pull a Clinton and push their world in senseless carnage. So much more bloodshed than doing it yourself. It also breeds more followers.

>Nurgle makes ya sick
Same as above with plagues. The go preach about accepting your suffering, and how this totally brings you closer to god.
Basically do a mother Theresa.

>Tzeentch zaps ya
Only if he's really incompetent. The more competent ones are having plots within plots within plots.
Tzeentch is about fucking shit up with style. Doing the messy work yourself is for plebs.

As fun as HLQ was, Zombie and Witch quest was his better offering.

So you're saying:
>The Khornate ones chop ya
>The Nurgling ones get ya sick
>The Tzeentchy ones zap ya.

All Chaos gods have degrees. Khorne isn't just RIP AND TEAR. It's also general anger and violence. Tzeentch is more than JUST AS PLANNED too.

Friendly reminder that in order to have tasted all the pleasures in the world Slaanesh would have had to live an entire mortal lifespan acting as a loving and loyal spouse to some peasant at some point.

It's a Chaos god. One human life is irrelevant.

(you)

Yeah, no mate.
Slaaneshi followers
>sacrifice you to pursue their own goals, your soul devoured by Slaanesh for all eternity
>stab you in the eyes, your slow and painful death only serving them for the briefest moment of experiencing something new
>use you as a living part of something grand they are building, keeping you alive so that your eternal torment fuels both their vision/art and Slaanesh
>kill you for no reason, except that your existence somehow offends them

Slaanesh is the worst god to follow. 99% of Slaaneshi followers just end up as a tool for achieving somebody else's pleasure and gain nothing from it. While every fucktard can be you used as cannonfodder for Khorne and dying in battle for him, becoming immortal as a gift from Nurgle and then spreading the gift further or attaining small power in the schemings of Tzeentch. And if you somehow manage to become a Chaos Champion, Slaanesh is still the worst by far. Khornates will pursue their bloodthirst, ultimately dieing fighting which is what they wish for, Nurgle followers will attain the immortality they sought and spread it further and if they die, they'll realize it's actually a good thing and Tzeentch followers will be able to scheme as much as they like and only someone better will be their downfall. Meanwhile Slaaneshi followers will trod the path of depravity, always searching but never attaining the ultimate experience. Until the only new emotion they can experience is death, but as their life will be draining from their body they will realize that death is actually a horrible thing.

It's win-win really.

You don't seem to understand the post. Try reading again.

No, he understood it fine. It just wouldn't matter to Slaanesh at all.

>Khornate 'smarter one' pulls a Clinton etc.

Fucking WRONG. If the Khornate doesn't do it with his or her own hands, Khorne won't grant you his favor. You need to get your hands dirty and kill people yourself, not just let other people kill each other.

Now if you're a Warlord who causes a planetary war by throwing your army at everyone and everything, THAT'S being Khornate.

This is the odd thing, and there's a strange theory I've heard.

Slaanesh attempts to experience every form of everything because it is outright incomplete, as Isha, Khaine, and Cegorach weren't consumed. It has the innate lust to experience everything because it knows it will never truly experience a feeling of fullness. It's a deranged, utterly insane child who knows something's wrong and doesn't know how to fix it outside of lashing out however it can in any form.

From there, it almost hates itself because the only true feelings it can feel from others are hatred (from the Eldar especially, the other Chaos Gods, and other sentient races), fear (the Eldar, its own servants, again other sentients), and despair (once again, Eldar.).

It lashes out so much that nothing truly loves it, and it knows nothing ever will. All of the excess is to fill the black hole that is Slaanesh's heart.

40k's Slaanesh will inevitably implode in a singularity of hatred, self-pity and hopelessness when the Eldar are all dead, as it can no longer hide the negative feelings of an entire galactic race and more chewing at it from the inside.

And this is how Ynnead is born.

An then Nurgle comes along: "See there was no point in struggling. Everything you've done was for naught. So just sit back, relax and watch the fireworks while they last. For this galaxy will die a slow miserable death and there will be no 'BANG!' in the end."

Just imagine the sheer horror the citizens of the Eldar empire went through when she was born. It was probobly the worst thing imaginable to experience the rape torture and murder of trillions of souls all for the pleasure of one being.

>no dick

Dropped

After which Ynnead rips Nurgle a new one with wraithbone gauntlets and has the Fire Dragons dispose of what's left.

Not like it will change anything. Just that there will be no one to talk to. Only silence.

>No one to talk to
>Ynnead likely unleashed the soul of every Eldar to have died after the birth of Slaanesh
>Literally trillions

You mean what was left of those souls after Slaanesh tortured them for 10'000 years ? Literally trillions of completely insane eldar souls.