Nobledark 40k Part VI: Get Off My Fucking Lawn Edition

I think something that might be expanded upon is the Cadian Pylons.

Locking the Chaos Gods out of reality and preventing that nightmare from ever getting worse is certainly about as noble as things get. Problem is, it would also probably kill every living thing with a soul and ruin FTL for most races. Is that a sacrifice most are willing to make? Is it still alright to make the choice for them?

YES, I think this provides a way for the Imperium and the Necrons to come into conflict while both sides be well-intentioned and reasonable:

Necrons: Look guys, we're trying to permanently remove the worse evil in the universe.
Imperium: Not really OK with our extinction to make it happen.

wait, what? Old Man Necron made the pylons?

Back when they were still being controlled/led by the C'tan yes.

I think they still exist in new fluff, but I can't remember.

I imagine when the Necrons had wiped the sleep out of their eyes and com out of the auto-pilot and the Silent King had arisen to speak for the largest faction of them that there would have at least initially have been the possibility of diplomatic dialogue.

I can also imagine it pissing off the eldar citizens of the Imperium enormously. They would find it incredible that they can't adequately communicate how fucking stupid humanity can be at times.

Agreements would be reached. In much the same way that the Maiden Worlds are off limits to settlers without eldar permission that they never give so too would the Tomb Worlds be treated. With everyone staying off of everyone else lawn things start to run smoother for a time. Emperor starts making deals with the lesser lords for including them in the mutual protection deals. Shit is looking hopeful. Crypteks are refusing to share toys and know how but such things would be used to keep the citizenry safe anyhow so it would amount to more or less the same.

Shit starts to go bad when the Necrons refuse to keep their Flayed Ones under control. Refuse to even apologize. Flayed Ones are still Necrons and even one of their damaged kind is worth a million lesser lives.

"Renegade" Crypteks keep abducting civilians for experiments.

Freshly awakened Necrons keep going about their genocidal business and the other Necrons refuse to keep them contained until their wits are awoken. They claim that the Sleep Walkers haven't actually broken any Necron Laws and that the Imperium should be grateful they are turning a blind eye to their half-slumbering brethren being shot at.

Then the Silent King returns after a long time absents and demands over a trillion human citizens every century for use in experiments to undo the bio-transference. By his estimations the dent in the human population would be more than recovered in the century allowed for recovery. In a great display of generosity the Emperor would be permitted to choose who of his people would have the honour of being sacrificed in this glorious endeavor. If taken evenly from the breadth of the Imperium their loss wouldn't even be felt.

At that point Emperor apologizes to the Eldar and admits that they were indeed right.

Necrons are added to the same list as Orks and Tyrannids in regards to how they should be treated.

The remains of the Silent King's messenger was returned in something resembling a paper soup cup and that was the last message the Emperor ever sent to the Silent King that wasn't delivered via weaponry.

I'll try doing thaat later, hopefully my MS Paint-levels of editing is adequate.

Does anyone have that one funny picture of an ork plane and there is a list of describing it in a comedic manner?

This one?

yeah thats it thanks.

>tfw abhumans are minimally distinguished from the rest of humanity
>tfw when healthy, nonchaotic human subspecies are considered natural and unremarkable to encounter after generations of space colonization and superscience
>tfw even terrans are technically "men of stone" reengineered in the early DAoT
>tfw the eldar are the only ones that care, and argue whether or not the improvements to the human genome make them worthy (or worthier) subjects than un-reformed creatures
>tfw I don't have to gild everything because we're already golden

Armageddon is constantly orked for the same reason it's a trade hub; warp currents converge there.

Its just really easy to get to and go through and the biggest warp current convergence current coming out of it goes through Sol. With a decent Navigator you can get from Armageddon to Old Earth in a few months under optimal conditions.

If Armageddon falls then Old Earth gets shanked in the front and back and shit gets broken fast. If Old Earth falls then the Imperium collapses in a few centuries at most.

Also orks fight there now because orks have fought there and it is fun.

So Armageddon is pretty much Cadia 2.0 except with Orks?

Yep. But there is a reason beyond just because.

Bumpan

>Ugh, close to being done and would have finished this but work intervened. I give up on trying to predict when this thing will be finished.
>You're right editfag, if this gets any longer I should just make a novel of it.

And so the battle raged on. Kairos Fateweaver was the last of the Greater Daemons to fall, screaming in rage and disbelief as it’s carefully laid plans were ruined, its frail body pulverized by the thunder hammers of a dozen vengeful Blood Angel Terminators.

Though their greatest champions had been cast down, the forces of Chaos did not relent. Night fell and there was no respite that evening, for daemons did not suffer from frailties like fear or exhaustion, and their mortal servants would never dare retreat lest they invite the displeasure of their fickle masters. Long into the night, the sounds of battle echoed through the darkened plaza, the shadowy figures of daemon and Astartes illuminated only by the brief flashes of power weapons and bolter muzzles, and the ghostly glow of plasma and warpfire.

Dawn broke as the last of the daemons were slain and banished to the warp, and the first rays of the sun touched on a hellish scene. The plaza was a mire of gore and viscera, so thick that the granite floor could not be seen beneath clotting pools of purple and red and brown, an accumulation of blood spilled over three days of ceaseless battle. Greasy tongues of black smoke reached into the sky from pyres of corpses fifty feet high, as alien, traitor, and daemon alike were fed into the fire.

Amongst the dead stood the few survivors, lonely figures of red and gold, the proud First Company of the Blood Angels and the legendary Adeptus Custodes reduced to a meager handful. They knelt above the bodies of their fallen brothers, the dead outnumbering the living, and no words were spoken as each man offered his silent prayers to the fallen. The honored dead, who just a few hours ago had been friends, comrades, and battle-brothers, were now reduced to corpses, cold and silent, by the savagery of the xenos, the treachery of man, and the hatred of Chaos.

Yet even in this time of their greatest weariness and sorrow, there was no time for rest. Frantic calls came from the perimeter, voices raw from battle and disbelief as the scouts reported a monstrous Ork the size of a building advancing towards the Eternity Gate, surrounded by a horde of Nobz as big as Warbosses. The Imperial defenders gritted their teeth and gripped their swords, rising on legs worn from days of relentless fighting. The Beast itself had come.

Yet when they turned to their Primarch for orders, they found that Sanguinius was still kneeling amongst the dead. They shouted but he did not hear, they shook him but he did not feel; for the visions had come again, stronger than ever before.

They assailed his mind, overwhelming thought, a thousand variations and permutations of his impending death: crushed beneath a foot the size of a land speeder, impaled on the end of jagged claws, swatted out of the air to be hacked down by swarming Nobz, and a thousand other ends too brutal to imagine. Any lesser man would have been driven to madness by the phantom pain, but Sanguinius summoned all his will and forced the visions back, suppressing them until they were not gone but at least tolerable, and his mind was his own once more.

He rose on unsteady legs to the relief of his men, and together the defenders pulled back from across the plaza. Sanguinius shouted orders as the Astartes and Custodes readied their weapons and gathered in a tight defensive circle before the Eternity Gate itself. Here, they would stand. Here, they would die.

The Beast announced its presence long before it reached the plaza, the ground itself dully reverberating with the weight of its steps. Steadily, the tremors grew stronger, until at least the Beast strode into view, granite cracking and splintering beneath its steps, its horde of hulking Nobz following close behind. Partway into the plaza, the Orks stopped, and for a few moments an eerie silence hung over the plaza as the two sides surveyed each other.

The Imperial defenders gazed for the first time on the monstrous Beast, whom before they had only heard of through hearsay and scattered reports. It was even more ferocious in the flesh: a towering monstrosity almost forty feet tall, defying all laws of nature and biology. Tusks as wide as a man jutted from its jaw and its gargantuan frame bulged with enough alien muscle to tear apart an Imperial Knight. It bore no weapons, instead grafting individual power field generators onto its jagged claws, and its crude armor was formed from the plates of destroyed Baneblades and Titans.

Even a spirit as pure and tireless as Sanguinius could be worn down. For days, he had faced the most terrible and nightmarish foes of humanity in endless combat, seen thousands of cherished friends and comrades butchered, resisted haunting visions of death and madness that would have broken any lesser man; and as Sanguinius gazed upon the overwhelming and terrible form of the Beast, for the first time he felt doubt.

What if it had all been useless?

What if all their struggle and sacrifice was for naught, and the light of humanity was snuffed out?

What if he failed?

Sensing an opening, the faintest blemish on Sanguinius’ soul, the dark gods of Chaos struck.

Creeping tendrils of dark thought seeped into his mind, offers and seductions, promises of power enough to fulfill all his dreams.

Kneel before me, boomed a voice of searing brass and raw power, and I shall give you and your soldiers such strength that none may stand before you, and the whole galaxy shall know peace under the might of your legions. And it was so, for Sanguinius himself leading the invincible legions of the Imperium to victory after glorious victory, sweeping away the enemies of man until only an iron peace remained, enforced under his watchful eye.

Join me, said a voice of chuckling mirth and boundless life, and man will never again fear the blight of mortality or the frailties of flesh, and you shall be free to spread across the galaxy to spread life wherever you tread. And it was so, for Sanguinius saw joyous families, untouched by age or weakness, venturing forth on great journeys of discovery, colonizing virgin worlds and facing the challenges of the galaxy with optimism and camaraderie.

Serve me, rasped a voice of eldritch cunning and ancient wisdom, and I shall grant you wisdom and foresight, and all the knowledge of the lost golden age of man. And it was so, for Sanguinius saw all the ancient wonders of humanity restored as man, filled with wisdom and understanding, walked among the stars to reclaim the galaxy with knowledge and technology.

Come with me, said a voice of whispering silk and untamed passion, and humanity shall be made tall and strong and golden, shaped in your image and as perfect as you. And it was so, for Sanguinius saw golden men and women, as tall and strong as he, striding across the stars without fear, their wings carrying them over the skies of distant worlds

The voices grew louder, each clamoring to be heard, sometimes working in concert to sway him, sometimes working to undermine the others. But they agreed on one thing: the way forward was so simple, so clear, and Sanguinius only need reach out to grasp the power and opportunity offered to him. Sanguinius was granted one final vision: he saw himself in the Throne Room of the palace, warpfire dancing in his eyes, the power of the Warp overflowing from his body. Before him, a bleeding Steward kneeled at his feet, and to his side the headless body of Eldrad lay discarded, the blind eyes of the severed head frozen in an accusatory glare. Reaching down, Sanguinius hauled the Steward upright as the voices exulted and laughed, and with a leering smile shoved his golden sword through the Steward’s chest.

-No-

In an instant the voices recoiled, and Sanguinius’ eyes snapped open. He had not realized they were closed.

-Only creatures as foul and debased as you would think that virtue could be gifted, that loyalty could be bought and bartered,- he thundered in his mind. -Strength does not come from might of arms, but from clarity of purpose and force of will. Joy does not come from a long life, but from a life well-lived. Wisdom does not come from arcane secrets, but from experience hard won in the trials of life. Perfection does not come through fairness of form and mind, but from struggle, sacrifice, and the will to better oneself, the noblest virtues of man.-

-Your pathetic entreaties have failed, false gods. Flee back to your twisted realms and think upon your failure, that for all your supposed power you could not sway this man to your cause. Know that though you have thrown all your greatest champions and sorceries and horrors against the bastion of humanity, we live on, and that man will rise from these ashes, stronger for having risen above such adversity. Know that man will one day conquer his baser self, that you will wither and starve, and far in the future when you have long disappeared, the light of humanity will continue to shine from the stars, until the universe itself comes to a close.-

And the voices howled and cursed, the Ruinous Powers swearing oaths of bloody vengeance upon Sanguinius and his kin. He smiled briefly and took a moment to savor their impotent rage, and then with a shout he banished the Chaos gods from his mind.

>That's it for now
>inspired heavily by the Temptations of Christ, as if the Jesus allegory wasn't already overdone enough in canon

>>Will I ever be productive apart from opening threads?
Fuck you, past me, yes I will.

After a few millenia of procasturbation, Perty is finally finished and polished. I accidentally doubled the word count, but oh well, all's well that ends well. Quick, anons, gimme suggestions for what else to do.
>Moar polishing (lemme know which Primarchs need it the most)
>Those shitty quotes I was gonna get round to for each Primarch/faction/whatever
>Ollie Pius, Battle of Terra, and shit.
>Other fresh dank OC
>I swear to fuck if you fags ask me to revise and expand Sangy I'll jump off a fucking bridge

FOR FUCK'S SAKE I GET UPSTAGED BY THE OTHER WRITEFAG WHEN I'M LITERALLY JUST FINISHING THIS GODDAMN THING nah, senpai, you're cool since it's about an order of magnitude better than my stuff anyways

I have no suitable picture to describe the awesome.

You say that the Perty has been finished and polished. Has it been put on the 1d4chan page get?

Or am I just being impatient

Whoops, yeah, just done now. Posted, and I'm fixing up the formatting now.

>I decide to put it through a word count and find out it's far longer than the Morty which I took just as long to do, feelsgoodma-
>mfw it's still barely half (or even less, given the new writefaggotry ITT) the length of sangy

Whoops, forgot to reset muh trip.
Anyway, yeah, whinging aside, I need ideas on what to do now, hopefully before I descend into a pit of instant noodles and vidya

Looking forward to reading it
At some point I intend to do a section on the semi-mythical life of Eldrad.

Good to have you back user. How do you feel about editing Sangy?

In all seriousness, you could do some fresh OC and take on some of the topics that still need fluff, like orks or Chaos eldar.

Thanks homie. Not sure I'm totally satisfied with some of the prose, but I wanted to get this portion out since it keeps getting loooongerrr......

I'm not sure about Orks or Croneldar; for all my whinging I'm not sure if I know enough of the fluff to be able to translate it into noblebright (but so much hnnnnnnnng over Armageddon).

Might bash out something for 'nids, I dunno. Hopefully it'll subconsciously calm my saltiness over how they keep getting Worf'd in canon fluff.

How do we get trolls in space?

...

We already have orks.

Just read the Perty section. Massive improvement.

Hey bumping.

If I were clearer on where merika fits in the timeline already set out I'd start writing fulgrim
>ignore the filename

Well, yeah. But I was thinking of trolls from Warhammer Fantasy. The big pukey ones that get dragged around by greenskins.

>page 9
Whoa Nelly! Don't archive yet!

Well here you go. My story about Taldeer being livid at LCB now screencapped for anyone to look, read and see and even save.

So guys, who're working with this Nobledark AU but still haven't seen this write-contribution of mine, what you think?

Wow is that Lance from the new/recent Voltron cartoon made by Netflix being hit on by an eldar?

>tfw Relic's Macha is an ugly bitch

Veeky Forums makes the best canon

Eh, just go for it and we can make it fit. Sangy and Duscht Jemanic comes late in the Unification since they help create the Mk III Astartes even though they're close to the Warlord's starting place, so my justification is that the Warlord left them alone for a long time because they would have been a tough opponent and probably hoped that Guilliman could sway them as leader of a united Europa.

Polishy McPolisher here WITH ANOTHER FANTASTIC PRODUCT!
Honestly, just go ahead and writerbot. Shit's still fairly vague so you probably won't tread on anyone's toes, and I'll fix any inconsistencies when I get around to clearing it up.

Also, since I was at war for so long, imma bash my way through the assassins as hot makeup sex for everyone on the thread [spoilers]and not because I can't come up with any dank OC

You guys know the map of Terra we've been using from the start is mostly bullshit, right?
>Gredbritton, not Albia
>Franj, not Franc
>Scandia not completely razed by the Emperor
>Where the fuck are Sek-Amrak and Xeric
>So much water, has there even been an Age of Strife?

It's the map we've been using from the start and we haven't had any problems so far. I say let's keep on using it.

Also this isn't exactly like GW 40K. Thank God.

Some sort of Mad Dok abomination. Somewhere between a Squiggoth and a regular ork. Huge, resilient, violent and stupid.

Or maybe orks chosen of Nurgle because super resilient, huge and regenerative but less inclined to do anything without a tard herder prodding them along.

Maybe there are both that the Imperium assigns the same label because they are basically very similar.

Perhaps in the nobledark, the Warlord intervened before Terra got maximum overfucked, with a butterfly effect on names and things?

Which also might explain why the Warlord had a far harder time thing Terra- the Emperor of the grimdark was far more ruthlessly pragmatic, and let humanity destroy itself so that he could better sweep up the pieces. Warlord though was more ideological/optimistic, and resolved to stop things before they got too far.

Regrettably, this led to a longer period of wars before Terra was unified, even then there were holdouts like Hy Brasil, and San Marino.

San Marino? Really?

No, not really. I just threw that in for giggles, since it's the oldest continuous republic and all.

Maybe the ancient land of Saminanno could have a sort of Isle of Man/Native reservation type deal with the rest of Europia. Not really it's own nation but considered sort of a convenient loophole type of place.

The maps we have been using are at such a scale that they wouldn't show up micro-nations or properly express oddities.

Or we could just be using a more entertaining start condition.

>How the fuck did we get onto LCB and Lofn?
Well OP, we can never have enough Love Can Bloom and Lofn. Lofn's just adorable and is one of the very few things Veeky Forums has and can agree on.

Not the poster you're replying to, but be cool user. Gotta offer up some ideas if you don't like the status quo.