Travel along a road with your (non)murderhobo group

>travel along a road with your (non)murderhobo group
>find a crying girl along the road
>she was part of a dragon's hoard but he dumped her out with some other trinkets he found redundant. In her case because she "ages poorly"
>wat do

Other urls found in this thread:

goblinpunch.blogspot.com/2015/12/dragon-cult-barbarians.html
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Check the map, clearly we've been going in circles.

Take her to the next town and pat her head before parting ways.

Tell her that she's surrounded by valuables and that she might be filthy rich, she can exchange some for goods and benefits in any near town including the one we're going to. She can come with us if she likes.

Good a reason as any to slay a dragon.

>Check the map
>In D&D
What a faggot, no wonder you lost your way, ask the fucking caster to cast locate city or whatever.

Sounds like a cool backstory for a new character.

Put her in a state where she won't ever age again, clearly.

Dis dragon ain't doin it right.

goblinpunch.blogspot.com/2015/12/dragon-cult-barbarians.html

He just tossed a good future breeder/reward for his champion out of his nest.

To be honest, do we even need a reason to slay dragons?

She's crying because a dragon LET HER GO?
We have bigger fish to fry, I tell the vain bitch to take her hurt feelings and get out of my way.

That rendition makes St George look decidedly unheroic. He's practically bullying that poor little dragon.

Although I have to say, I am loving his aesthetic. The jet black form-fitting armour, the pink cloak, the horse wearing a bridle with a jewelled or enameled headpiece? Fucking classic.

>cast locate city
The last time we did that, it started a zombie apocalypse. I'll stick with the map, thanks.

>missing the joke

We've already decided on offing the sugar daddy dragon, user. Get with the program.

stop briefly to browse discarded trinkets before moving on, throw her some bread and water

the next merchant convoy can escort the useless cunt to the nearest town

If Im not in a hurry, probably talk to her and formulate a plan with her.

There was a joke?

Clearly it's our duty as the heroes to make her young again and force the dragon to take her back, or die trying. To adventure!

It is an old post about "you find a beaten raped elf lady on the road"

Dragonslaying is not for the faint of heart or gentle of spirits.

I hoot agitatedly and flap my wings while waiting for the badger and mouse to catch up. The mouse fleeces her pockets for cheese while the badger looks gruffly on. I give a few placating hoots and provide healing spells if she needs them. We then part ways with her to find the asshole wizard who's going around awakening animals and enchanting them to think they're adventurers.

I really like this

Holy shit! Epic.

>Tfw playing anima
Murder her, then the dragon. Supernatural isnt real citizen.

Probably get roasted by a dragon.

Pretty much all pre Renaissance art makes dragons look like colossal faggots.

It's made smug retards think dragons were always supposed to be small in folklore, which is incredibly irritating.

I love how he lances the dragon. I want to try that with my lancer character in my casual campaign

Create a Portal back to London.
Throw her through.
Continue on my jolly way.

She was probably an awkward teen who fell in love with the dragon because of how beautiful it's sparkly scales were.

Cast Flesh to Stone on her.

Now she'll weather the centuries considerably better.

>Why do I always have to fight the retarded dragons?

>which is incredibly irritating.

Dragons are the avatars of Satan, you weren't and aren't supposed to portray Satan as an immensely powerful being.

I mean, that's kinda why he spends his time torturing people and leading them astray? The devil's angry and spiteful at his fall from grace, yet only has the power to enact his anger on human beings.

>>Why do I always have to fight the retarded dragons?
This made me laugh harder than it has any right to.

...

Maximum over-lewd

This is probably best post. Our game would give random humanitarian xp for 'doing the right thing' anyway, so it isn't like we'd need her loot.

Here's a sword and a slab of wood with a handle bolted to it. Get to the back of the marching order line, and get to goddamn work. We'll be rolling on dragon steaks and red scale boots before the month's end.

Most autistic answer yet.

And you're too thick and dull to even follow a gigantic hook leading you to mass treasure.

>dumped by a dragon
wow she must be a bitch

>Put my Cloak of Elvenkind around her
>Take her back to the party lodge
>Make sure she's warm by the fire
>Gather some eggs from the livestock
>Cook them and place them in a bowl
>Hand the bowl to her, and say:
>"You don't have to tell me what the Dragon did, but you do have to eat this."

>Your alignment shifted towards M'Lawful-Good

What does the Paladin archetype "White Knight" give you?

Does it replace Charisma with Intelligence?

...

>old post
Try ancient.
I think that post pre-dates Veeky Forums.

I get that reference.

if you care at all for the environment then yes, you need a really good reason to kill an animal that is at the top of the food chain

I understand why the paintings depicted them as dragon manlets, but what I find irritating is that idiots use them as a reference to make claims that large dragons are a modern invention, usually while being insufferably smug about it.

I remember a particularly stupid article on the subject that did the rounds about a year ago.

Well, I mean, at the very least you need a dragon.

They environment will adapt, just as it always has. And if it does so in a way that we don't like, the we'll just kill the offending animals until they're no longer a problem. Rinse and repeat until it reaches a state we like.

>"HURR IMMA DRAGON"
>Yes you are son. *sniff* Yes you are...

Sell her to someone with the other trinkets.
It's free money

>Your alignment shifted towards M'Lawful-Good
link to reference?

...

>we'll destroy everything and kill all animals
disgusting.
Enjoy your troll invasion once there are no more dragons to keep them at bay

After meeting my group, she'll regret having been dumped by the dragon - that is unless she really aged badly or is very charismatic.

If she has a cool personality, she'll probably be treated right and will become a follower. If she aged badly and has a shit personality she will probably be tied to a tree and abandoned. If she aged ok but has a shit personality, she'll get edgelorded, then either murderhoboded, or tied to a tree and abandoned, or used as slave and then sold.

Get the girl to a village she can find a stable life in. Worst case scenario I could always use someone to fetch firewood, watch the wagon and help our cleric with tending to more mundane injuries.

Also find out more about this dragon. There's good money in that shit.

>Here's a sword and a slab of wood with a handle bolted to it
>not offering a good shield and a sturdy knife
It's like you want your footmen to die.

>Thinking we won't just kill the trolls until they stop being a problem
>Thinking That a troll invasion would be something to worry about for a population that just crusaded all of their dragons
>Thinking we won't keep up this process of killing the next wannabe Apex predator until we end up with an animal that isn't that much of a threat to us

Face it user, If most non-sapient fantasy creatures, and arguably certain sapient ones [spolier] (*coughdrowcoughweezemindflayerscough*) [/spoiler] were to disappear, the world would be a much easier place to live in.

Besides, conceptually Dragons are cool, but in practice they're assholes. And like most assholes, they're only funny when they happen to someone you don't like.

Huh, turns out to be a /b/ thread.

I think you just inadvertently solved the dragon-eats-too-much issue.
Apparently, dragons eat half trolls.
Eat half a troll, let it grow back, eat more troll.

/b/ is an orange board....
Whoever captioned that screen cap is a dumbass.

This bitch IS the dragon. I've played this plot before.

kill the trolls and you cause some other unbalance, which would inevitably affect the good species too.
And in a fantasy world with actual living forces of nature and gos and demigods messing too much with natural balace doesn't seem lke a good idea, unless you want a chaos spirit or nature god on your ass.

You know you can change the backgrounds, right?

If you mean the calling out /b/ for being /b/, yeah that's dumb.
If you mean the duck, that was me.

Ask her about Bane. Always wondered why does he wear the mask.

You have a point.

My alchemist empathizes with her deeply and sheds a few tears for her. Then he kills her and turns her corpse into a pretty doll that will last forever. Then he displays the doll/corpse in a fancy room and dresses her in the finest clothing. Maybe he could even give her some company. The more dolls the merrier.

Doing good deeds makes him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Now the poor woman doesn't have to worry about aging poorly and she can be pretty forever.

But Bane does not wear a mask.

How much of a bitch do you have to be to get tossed out (so it didn't even want to dirty its claws things got so bad) by a dragon of all things? They're even less picky than humans as to what they fuck!

Anyways, my character:
>Inquire what kind of dragon
>Inquire size of dragon
>Inquire if the climate is any different due to its presence as opposed to the rest of the immediate region
>Inquire as to general size and composition of hoard
>Inquire if she wishes to purchase any weapons
>Show her premium models anyways
>Explain the myriad dangers of the area, show some cheaper models
>Ask if she needs some ammo instead then
>Offer deal on installing energy transmission cabling from nearest capital to wherever whatever hut she lives in happens to be.
>It's a good deal, only use highest quality enamel
>Ask if the dragon might still be in a buying mood
>Ask about GDP of nearby villages
>Ask partymembers to stop dragging him away he's not done he had just a handful more question

If I pull it on will he die?

I have many problems with this.
Playing a leper and all


you mean sending a fucking peasant to kill a fire breathing, flying, scaled dinosaur.
Fuck no
Also your post was cringe

It would be extremely painful

Does my sanguine dowsing rod point to her? I need to get my blood economy going.

He's a big guy

for you

It's called symbolism bruh.

The dragon is puny and small before the wrath of the lord or some shit.

A dragon, you say?

...

You happen to be in luck, for I am a top tier chronomancer, I can stop that aging problem lickety split.

Then I encase her in a permanent chronostasis field and teleport her directly back to the dragon. Another good deed done thanks to wizard kind. Not that we'll ever get a single thank you for it. It's tough being so beneficent.

Finally, after hours of coaxing as they sat around the campfire, the girl, scared out of her mind, told her story.

At first, the party couldn't believe what they had just heard.

A dragon letting go of so much as a shiny rock is unheard of, much less throwing out a pile of treasure.

After the shock had passed, four members of the party turned as one towards the fifth, desperately trying to prevent the inevitable.

By the time they had, he had already thrown off his clothes, and leapt into the sky, exploding into a mass of fire, scales and profound irritation.

His time with the party had mellowed him out, believe it or not. Sure, he was going to kill the stupid whelp, but at least he would bury him.

After all, not only had he wasted His most valuable time while the , but the idiot had also thrown out a perfectly good wench.

There was a dragon too stupid to live, because he had let go of his hoard willingly.

There was a dragon too unlucky to live, because he had pissed off the Dragon Lord.

Ask where the dragon when then ask the girl where her god is. If she replies anything but the golden throne shoot her.

Nice.

>roleplaying is cringe/autistic
>on Veeky Forums
Go back to whatever board you came from.

I hand her a potion and tell her that with it, she will never age again.

This should keep my quota of 'good deeds' to balance out the farm I accidentally burned down yesterday.

>Rathalos armor
It's like you want to get fucked in the ass

>Ask where valuables are
>Take valuables
>Give her like three of them
>Ask where the dragon lives
>Ask her about traps and defenses of the dragon's lair.
>Drop her off in a town, maybe come back idk
>Go off to murder a dragon and get sweet loot which apparently includes some ageless hot chick.
Seems like the best course of action to me.

>dragon
>THROWING OUT ANYTHING OUT OF HIS HOARD EVER
Do you think me so dumb to fall for such an obvious trap? It's called "hoard" for a reason, for fuck's sake!

I always wanted this as a banner.

Some pieces of medieval art are just hilarious

...

>A dragon
>giving away part of its hoard for any reason

A dragon's hoard is like the definition of redundancy because they never spend it and (depending on the setting) it's not like they need it to live. This is clearly a trap of some sort, but screw it let's have the girl point us in the dragon's direction and go with it.

the dragon throws her away instead of just eating her ok shit dm

These guys know what's up.

It's a fucking trap, obviously. No dragon would ever willingly part with any part of it's hoard unless it was to get an even bigger hoard. And even then probably only if it thinks it can get that part back afterwards.

Soon as we get close the dragon is going to swoop in, ambush us, take all our gear and then fuck off back to it's lair with the trinkets and the girl.

I guess she wouldn't be crying if she wasn't high on stockholm syndrome so we may have to drop her in safety at the town and not let her know we're gonna gut her scaly husbando.

Now see, I like this, but it makes me wonder what the hell he was doing with the party. That sounds like it could be an interesting story.

I like my dragons Rathalos/Lagiacrus size unless they're Smaug expies and we need an army to fell them.

>dumped her out with some other trinkets he found redundant. In her case because she "ages poorly"
She's his daughter who refused to leave her daddy's lair, so he gave her enough to start her own hoard and kicked her out. right?

DragonOP. I could write something up, if enough people were interested. It's a setting I've been working on for fun.

Murderhobo her