Guy refuses to play archers or bards because he sucks at archery and doesn't know how to play music

>guy refuses to play archers or bards because he sucks at archery and doesn't know how to play music

Do any of your players have self-imposed restrictions as insane as this?

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I do 120 pushups a day, unless I feel like alternating them with palms-out chinups.

Go cry about it on [OTHER WEBSITE], fatty.

I know this one guy who can shoot lightning out of his hand but he won't even play Wizards cause he says magic is for queers. Is there no helping these people?

I refuse to play doctors, because I know shit about medicine and human anatomy. I refuse to play hackers, because the only thing I do on computers is shitposting.
And so on.

I'm autistic and so are all my characters. Does that count?

There has to be a cyberpun game where "shitposter" is a valid class, surely?

I don't play as women because I'm not useless outside of the bedroom.

Edgy/10 post my good man.

I do 100, 100 sit-ups and 100 squats (yes).
I don't see how that's relevant

While not a "restriction", I always try to default to the most physically strange or monstrous choices I can. It's just what I fond most enjoyable, regardless of party role.
Unfortunately, many systems tend not to conform to my highly specific tastes in PCs.

You can probably play as a virtual adept meme magician in Mage.

I'd be worried if he's willing to play Deathwatch or a d20s wizard...

...

Yeah, I know a guy who generally refuses to play any sort of magic user outside of a Paladin because 'mages are squishy'.

He even refused to play MtAw for the longest time, because he felt the idea of Magic-Users being anything other than shriveled up bookworms to be, "just wrong."

Jokes on him though, he's now playing in my campaign as a Time Mage- time travel being his other autistic phobia

not really a "self-imposed restriction" but one of my players admitted finally that after playing for 4+ years, he only plays himself.

We already knew this but its good to hear he admits it. The only downside is that he never makes a backstory and because he plays himself he sometimes fucks the party out of spite.

>I don't see how that's relevant
It was a joke based on a thread earlier in the week about a supposed GM who supposedly weeded out his supposed player base by supposedly making all of them supposedly perform 20 pushups before he would supposedly allow them to make a character.

Supposedly.

...

To be fair, I would hardly call that 'insane'. While I can't speak as to how uncommon it is, there's certainly something to be said for playing something that has some overlap with your own abilities.

Sure, you don't have to be an archer to play one, but it's nice to be able to treat bows as something other than 'guns-with-strings'. That it matters if it's raining, or how different kinds of woods behave.

And sure, you don't have to be a musician to be a bard, but it can be cool to be able to improv a couple lines in a relevant situation, or to write ballads of your party's exploits, or to cut your enemies down to size with a song.

And you don't have to be a mechanic or anything to play a rogue, but it's nice to be able to put together a clever mechanism or trap, instead of saying 'this is what the book says I can do, so that's all I can do'.

In short, you're either blowing this out of proportion, or communicating badly the extent of what's going on. You can only blame someone so much for not wanting to go outside of their comfort zone.

Thats far better than a tone death bard who sings all the fucking time.

I cant do more than five pushups but I accept this as a sad fact of life and try to improve to 6.
What now bitch?

>cause he says magic is for queers

It is.

I try not to play techies in Star Wars, because the way that technology works in Star Wars in no way resembles its real-world counterparts and I end up fucking myself over with preconceived notions.

I have a player who refuses to play anything else than a beautiful young noble archer girl. It sounds like it is a lot more restrictive than what you described.

>tone death bard

Tone Death is my favourite music based supervillain.

I don't play as women because I'm not useless inside the bedroom. [spoilers]no homo[/spoilers]

Ever listened to Sunn O)))?

It's one of the oldest memes.

As a GM the last year has slowly seen me go from describing combat with all sorts of little flourishes and flairs with "he attacks you" because the guy playing the fighter does HEMA and won't shut the fuck up about how little I understand of combat.

That sort of design would just weigh down the weapon. You don't use that weapon that way. It doesn't make sense for him to attack like that. If he's doing that with his shield, I would be able to break his arm instantly.

I'm so fucking tired.

I myself am not good at coming up with clever deceits/excuses, so I don't play high deception characters because all I would be able to do is 'i try to convince him that there's a fire over there and to leave his post' or whatever

You know what you must do.
youtube.com/watch?v=s0m57ONmw8c

Can you give some examples?

>being too pussy to tell him to shut the fuck up

>This is a fantasy game, we're using fantasy physics

I don't play wizards because I'm typically too tired and depressed to delve into the rules to make a good one.

My only "restriction" as a player is that I don't like to play something that I've played in a campaign before because I feel I've 'already done that story' even if the setting is different.

but I do make an effort to research things if I'm doing something with a base in realism instead of magic/fantasy crafting. I spent days looking up proper herbalism to play a character in a game that died out a little bit after.

ah! a bard... that is also an archer! what a concept! ranged buffs and ranged attacks!

I refuse to play any new campaigns with my friend sbecause it will end up having a HUEG TWEEST! in that it is part of the exact same campaign as the last 5 and people are just other versio0ns of their other characters, again.

That was an option in 4th edition D&D, at least. It was kinda cool.

>TFW you actually kind of like Sunn O))

Yeah well I do 121 pushups a day nerd.

I've got one in my campaign, except barding isn't a combat skill, it's a civilian skill.

I wont play a thief class because I'm not black.

Thank you! I was trying to remember that name.

I won't play thief class because they were always a mistake.

You have a stove in your bedroom?

That's a good point, but your average 21st century human doesn't know shit about bows, melee weaponry, trapmaking...
and we don't even have actual arcane/divine magic to use for context
So unless OP's person is incidentally pretty into RL melee stuff there'd be no sense in avoiding Bard or Ranger on those grounds

Why didn't you just kicked him out and told him not to come anymore.
People like this have zero support and friends and if you talk to other people in the group, they will always unanimously support you.
If you are that pussy of a person, just change the location and time of the next session and block his number.
He will get it sooner or later.

I kicked out retards like this during their first session since none of us is having fun playing with faggots like this and if he is having fun making fantasy miserable for others, then that's person we don't want near us in any capacity.
Happily I only encounter these kind of sociopaths only four times.

I prefer not to play prepared casters like Wizards in D&D and similar because, on the occasions I have, I realize I'm no good at knowing what spells to prepare and tracking all the spells I know. Best-case scenario, I end up so spoiled for choice that I've got to read guides for hours to make a good decision.

I do 122 step to me fool

Your DM sounds almost exactly like mine.

I refuse to be a PC at all. I just opt to be all the peaceful NPCs and throw the rest of the party out of my shops because I'm not a homeless sociopath.

I mean, if it's relevant to the damage being done or the effectiveness of the attack I could see why voicing his opinion would be tolerated.

But if we're talking about what happens after the dice fall he can start his own group if it irks him so much.

I hope this was real and I hope I someday get to play with that GM.

Just so I can do more pushups than everybody else in the goddamn room and still be a raging jackass with my character simply to spite the DM.

>That sort of design would just weigh down the weapon.
Yeah, you'd think so but somehow it works out. It's some mystic shit my dude, made by fucking mist dwarves.
>You don't use that weapon that way. It doesn't make sense for him to attack like that.
You're right, it DOESN'T make sense. His skill with the weapon is beyond your puny mortal comprehension. Take an extra 1d4 SAN damage.
>If he's doing that with his shield, I would be able to break his arm instantly.
As you move to begin your maneuver, he changes his footing, and you realize that it was actually a feint. His clever tactic to bait you was a success and you're caught off guard against his real attack.

>His skill with the weapon is beyond your puny mortal comprehension. Take an extra 1d4 SAN damage
This. I don't get how people have trouble with those kind of cuntery.

I learned that trick literally my first session DM'ing as a kid. My brother playing a dwarf kept making a point of examining every door or pedestal or wall I ever mention as being made of stone, not for traps or anything, just because, you know, dwarves are in to stone. It was funny, then I got sick of it, so I told him the stone was really in disrepair, just like all the rest of the stone in this dungeon, all this good stone being trapped in this crappy old dungeon, man, you start getting depressed. Save vs. will. Oh, looks like it's really gotten you in the dumps, you're taking -2 attack rolls for the next day. should've kept your eyes on the prize.

Give in game consequences and players learn real quick: DM fucks with you, you don't fuck with the DM.

>I got sick of a harmless character quirk so I gave him a fairly significant debuff for an entire day
Real mature

Well I know I'm an idiot so I shy away of characters with high INT stats.

I only play cute girls because I'm a faggot, does that count?

Same, also with Cha

>intentionally stultifying game flow
>harmless character quirk
Nice sophistry, are you a kike? Your GM must be a pushover. That was when I was 13, today it would've lasted until the dwarf could find some good stonework to regain his morale, or some other kind of unspecified distraction, like carousing. If you start kvetching like you're already doing here, I'll frame it as part of your depression and point out you're getting on everyone's nerves which would be true.

What are your stats?

STR: 6 INT: 15 WIS: 14 DEX: 8 CON: 5 CHA: 14

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>>>/tumblr/

You know you could just take a recurring offender aside and explain why what they're doing is bad for the game, right? But no, all intent must be inferred from numerical values being lowered, because that's how human beings are meant to interact.

lol this is a 10/10 post for real nigga. every other reply is some salty ass nigga's. wouldn't recommend you kick someone out for something so trivial. but go back to saying these things and just make it funny when ever he talks shit.

though with that being said. if you're GM would it really hurt you to learn weapon techniques?

Getting so upset at even the perceived situation of an "undeserved" debut suggests an autism on your part a lot more strongly than a general DM philosophy favoring in-game consequences, even if somewhat gonzo, over out-of-game wrist slapping by any count. Or that you've just never played a non-convention/gameshop-sanitized RPG. You know debuffs can be fun, too, right?

In any case, it works wonders making good players out of entitled children like you.

Wew lad

My character was cursed to always get a bit of pee on himself evertime he pissed.
No matter how many times he shakes his penis

you just fucking stick them with the pointy end idk, just let me play out my subtle magical realm in peace

I once played a game using a similar system to WoD in which each player played themselves as statted by the person next to them, which was then approved or not by the person on the other side.
Was pretty interesting, i particularly remember that they insisted i had a maxed out computer skill, despite only being a fairly decent PC game player. Perspective can be interesting.

that sounds like a lot of fun with a group you're familiar with but a total fucking awkward nightmare with strangers

Oh there is no chance in hell I'd even try with strangers, this particular game was done during a club in high school, we had all played with each other, and most knew each other fairly well before we played the previous campaign anyway.

I refuse to play characters that are capable of exercising basic logic or reason because I responded to this shit-post.

I know a guy who only plays small races. Halflings, gnomes, occasionally dwarves. If the setting doesn't have races, he'll play a short human.

I don't play riders. I have no fucking idea about horses, last time I saw one live was when I was 5 and I honestly don't feel like bullshitting I have any clue how to take care for one or ride one for that matter.
Dunno, kind of irrational, because I have no other qualms, but this one is definitely it.

I've got a vegan player who let his PC starve to death, because the only things to eat in a across-the-wilderness campaign were eventually their pack horses and oxens

...

I refuse to play males because i'm a huge pervert.

Not him, but blessed are those who never have to face short supply of players. There are situations where kicking someone out is equal with disbanding group. And people playing along not because they like each other or enjoy their company, but because there are literally no other players around.
It's like you can't imagine being a fa/tg/uy in Bumfuck, Nowhere OR being a fa/tg/uy in an environment not exactly supportive for such hobbies, like for example the worst hood in the city.
And this shit is so common I fully understand why the original user entures obnoxious asshole just to have a game running.

I don't really play the bard/courtier/etc "charming fuck" character options in games. Charming people come off as dishonest and scheming to me (which is generally distasteful) and I don't really enjoy the idea of trying to be that.

You must have really, really low social skills and general exposure to people.
As in - pathologically low.

And I'm not even trying to bash you, this is just simply amazing, even for Veeky Forums, how one can be fucked up when it comes to social interaction and people being nice read as "dishonest".
Man, you've got some serious issues

I don't play artists of any kind, because I can't play any instrument, sing, compose or draw for shits and I'm pretty self-conscious about it. So pulling escapism about my PC being proficient in any of this stuff makes me simply uneasy.

Not everyone is a soulless psychopath, user.

Yes, because it takes to be soulless psychopath (do you even know what that term means?) to not be freaked by people around you, especially those nice to you. Surely, they just want to abuse you and scheme behind your back.
Now that's called paranoid delusions, combined with a dash of narcism, since it makes you unable to realise world doesn't end on you and yourself.

Do they all count cards?

No amount of bullshitting will remove the fact that your fake smile and brownnosing is obvious to everyone.

Social skills aren't great, that's for sure.

As for exposure I've had a lot of the kind you don't want more of. After a while you learn the shittiest people aren't the ones who are a dick to you from the moment you meet them, they can at least be trusted to do that and avoided.

Charming people will try to infect you. They try and get past your usual strategies, get in with what few friends you have, worm their way into the different parts of their life so removing them gets harder and harder. That's when they start taking anything they think is valuable from you, torment you and don't leave you alone whatever you do. By the time they've had their fun there's little left.

There might be people who aren't malicious when they intentionally manipulate social situations but I've run into enough people who aren't that I don't wanna risk that horseshit again.

>Every smile is fake!
>It's all brownnosing!
Yep, like I was saying - delusional paranoia

Let me get this straight.
Charming means scheming? That's what you are trying to tell?

Holy shit, I know this is Veeky Forums, but this is beyond average basement dweller logic. Nice knowing you have some serious trust issues and that somehow makes being nice to people wrong.
Then neckbearders wonder why people give them shit. Well, cause-effect mechanism maybe?

>I was a pick-up kid
>I also have no social skills
>That means every person that smiles is in fact stereotypical high-school bully that just wants make me suffer
>And the world around is just evil and abusive
Let me guess - you've read Reader's Digest version of Nietzsche's works when you were 15?
Or, which is more likely, you ARE 15, at least mentally.

>Not running 10 km a day
>Not turning the AC off EVEN IN SUMMER

>get in with what few friends you have
Have you ever considered that you're the least interesting in your friend group?
>hey try and get past your usual strategies
Now what kind of strats we talking about here? Because that's already an extremely not normal way of talking about socializing that I need to know how fucked you really are.

Why do you pursue social hobbies?

I never play bards because most of my group are actually musicians and will bring instruments when they're playing bard characters.

>Having AC at all
On a serious note - why the fuck you even have AC in your house? You live in tropics or what?

Probably american, they love their AC

>live in southern scandinavia
>30 degrees celcius in summer
>"just open a window"

>Why do you pursue social hobbies?
Probably he heard that RPGs are for shut-ins and now has hard time comprehending why it's still about social activities.

>Nothern Scandinavia
>25 Celcius in summer
>Good Lord, it's the end of the world!
Funny how small the world is.

>People who start socialising with me are in fact alien spies dedicated on ruining my life and taking away my friends.
>They avoid me, because I'm the only sane person around.
No Jim. You are off your pills again.

Oh god that reminds me.
Are you being gang stalked? Anyone suck your dick and finger your bum in a safeway while you were just trying to get a bagel recently?