Your party meets at a tavern

>your party meets at a tavern
>this is your waitress

How does that alter the course of your campaign?

you have to go back to mexico

She's from kansai.

>no dick
Doesn't alter anything desu

I don't believe you.

I buy the tavern and settle down with the maid.

>How does that alter the course of your campaign?

Not at all. It's just another harlot who's serving us food at the local brothel.

Bitch needs to grow out her hair for me to have any fucks to give.

Leave, we are probably in the wrong tavern. Or it's an ERP game and it's normal.

What's her statblock and skill list?

Adventure gets derailed as bard and barbarian come to blows over her leading to tavern brawl!

And the smut circlejerk does it again

>leave
you wouldn't want her boss to scold her for scaring off the clients again, would you?

I'm an otyugh so this thread is going to keep me filled through next month.

which the waitress wins!

I roll to seduce.

I was gonna stat her in GURPS and throw in Erotic Arts for a joke, but I have work to do and that would take too long.

So have this instead.

>A good bait thread is like a fine wine.
>Will you take the bait? Y/N
>Y

Since we're playing in a conservative dwarven society, this would raise some eyebrows. My cleric would be concerned for her well-being, maybe not go full white-knight but definitely start a side quest to find out what's going on here. Is she here by her own will? Why does she look so cheerful in such an exposing, probably chilly outfit? Is there a charm person spell at work here? Perhaps she's a construct?

"Skimpy barmaid in the wrong setting" sets me off ever since my party wound up in a tavern full of Jackalweres and almost got eaten by the adorable, pregnant bar owner. Detect Good and Evil will be my best friend in every tavern, forever.

Par for the course

I hit my DM over the back of the head and warn him that if this is the kind of game he wants to play I'm out.

Also he isn't welcome around my younger family members any more.

I wouldn't care. Get a grip you sad excuse for a human.

lol what a fag

>erotic arts
why? She's clearly a demure young girl who's sexually inexperienced.

SENSEI

wow what a strong man you are, I bet your wife and kids look up to you.

>perhaps she's a construct
what kind?

I tell the players that the campaign is over, and tell them to get the fuck out of my house. I have shit to do.

I want to join DM KUN!

YOU EXIST TO SERVICE US YOU CANNOT REFUSE

I ignore her because muscle girls aren't my fetish. Wake me up when we find a cute, innocent, young Kobold or Goblin shortstack or something.

We recruit her.
Her strength and dexterity will be precious to carry out our mission.

I bite on the plot hook to look for the wizard who is experimenting in such fleshcrafting. Clearly this is the work of powerful magic; I will either have this power for myself or ruin it for anyone who likes it.

Treat them like a regular bar harlot but make sure not to flirt with the GM.