Poseidon, in ram form, stole the nymph Theophane to an island of sheep herders, where he transformed her into an ewe so he could have his way with her among the flocks.
Not in nymph form. But as fucking. sheep.
Why the hell were the Greek gods such huge furries?
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maybe Nymph and sheep reproductive parts are incompatible
In ancient times, animals were basically aliens. Take every guy whose gapped to green women and suddenly bestiality doesn't seem so weird.
But the times, they are a' changin.
>And that's how the race of the Welshmen were born
This doesn't even count as furry because they're not anthropomorphic. Also they're both sheep so technically I don't this this is even beastiality, just transformation fetish.
>This doesn't even count as furry because they're not anthropomorphic.
>He doesn't know about Feral
You poor innocent babe
That's because these stories were basically the porn of ancient Greece. And there was no original author of the mythology so it's basically all Fanfiction.
Because it's only in the recent years that highly sheltered and prudish societies became so overly worried about what is bad-wrong sex between consenting adults.
Still better than Loki, who turned into mare, as a part of a prank to lure carpenter's horse away from the job.
Ended up fucking the horse, and having it's baby. Or foal, or whatever they are called.
What do you mean by recent years? Because Catholicism has been telling people that any kind of sex is evil and sinful for centuries if not millennia.
They were fucking nuts, I tell you.
Zeus once transformed into a goose to fuck a woman.
A FUCKING GOOSE
>Not mentioning the Golden Shower
Simple. Ancient Greeks where shepherds, farmers, and fishermen largely constrained to a few islands for most of their lives. Also, they hated women so much so that they considered the only true love to be that between two men, and considered sex with women to largely be an unfortunate necessity. You know where this is going.
Sheepfuckers, every last one.
>consenting
>Greek gods
lol
I remember that Norse Mythology had Loky transform into a fem horse to seduces another horse from doing his job or something and later gave birth too.
Of course you'd remember that one Donald.
The dude banged Aphrodite, physical perfection of the female form. Where was he gonna go after that?
Loki has the moral high ground here. There was no rape and kidnapping in his case.
Well, he did it to ether win a bet with the carpenter, or to help someone else to win a bet.
So, sure less bad than kidnapping and rape, but still immoral.
But it was because of business reasons.
There where no actual feeling involved.
I dunno. I mean if you're a god that can fuck anything you want at some point you're probably going to start just doing crazy shit out of boredom, and turning into a ram to fuck someone you turn into a goat might be the only thing you can think of that's still kinky
Because for the Greek gods rape isn't a big thing, it's like getting a smoke. You do it pretty much anywhere as long as you got the stuff needed for it. For them banging as animals was nothing special.
Originally Poseidon transformed Theophane into an ewe because he wanted to hide her from all the human lovers that chased her onto the island he hid her. But he also transformed all the people on the island into sheep to prevent them from telling this to the Theophane's lovers. Later he had enough and changed the other lovers to wolves because they started to slaughter all the shee of the island. He didn't change Theophane back to a beautiful woman because he was a selfish fuck (like Greek gods duh!) and didn't want anyone to fell in love with the beauty of Theophane ever again so he changed into a sheep and fucked her like that. I mean come on it is simply the proper way to do this what would people think if they would see a god fucking a sheep right?
Greek gods work on idiot logic.
He also gave the mutant eight legged offspring to his adoptive brother as a gift. Loki is pretty much of higher moral standing than any Greek god who's name isn't Hades.
My guess is that the various gods of Greece were the outcome of centuries of cult practices that go back to animal worship. At one point, Athena just was an owl, Zeus and Hera were a bull and cow, and Poseidon was a ram. The stories from that period keep getting retold even after the gods get seen primarily in human form, so a lot of shapeshifting goes on to make sense of it all.
More in the spirit of this thread, I'd like to point out that Chiron is a total Mary Sue character.
>Unlike all the other centaurs, my character is a paragon of civilisation and self-control
>Actually, he's not really a centaur, he just looks like them but anyone would instantly be able to tell that he's another superior being.
>Did I mention that his father is a god?
I agree.
...There has to be a less inane way for me to say this.
Greek gods work on rape logic and pettiness.
Norse gods work on drunken bets and stupidity.
>Greek gods work on rape logic and pettiness.
>Norse gods work on drunken bets and stupidity.
Quality worldbuilding fodder right here.
Can we extend that to other pantheons?
>He doesn't know about Feral
That's called zoophilia user
Hindu: might really does make right, but only for gods.
Japanese: Everything is a god or a devil. EVERYTHING.
Chinese: Follow the paperwork and all is good.
Egyptian gods work on incest and frustration
>Japanese: Everything is a god or a devil. EVERYTHING.
>Chinese: Follow the paperwork and all is good.
Actually the paperwork part should also go on most of Japan's stuff.
Aztec gods work on sacrifice and sacrifice
> incest
To be fair, a lot of pantheons feature tons of incest. Might say something about humanity, come to think of it.
That is kind of vague.
I think it's more to do with most pantheons not having enough gods to avoid it, especially when there was one or two original creators
I like Japan's worldbuilding
>Hades
>bad
He's one with the fewest dickish stories mate.
>tfw playing Mictlan
Reading comprehension, do you have it?
>>To be fair, a lot of pantheons feature tons of incest. Might say something about humanity, come to think of it.
Not that much, the thing with god doing incest comes from the logic that Gods can only descend from other god but they have to originate from somewhere. Back then the clan mentality was much more prominent than being practical so most pantheons are modeled after the systems they had for families, clans, tribes or what have you for easier understanding of the masses. Most pantheons function like that with hierarchy and parent-child relationships but since they cannot bring other gods in from outside their line, their line goes back to one origin of the creation of the world so they inevitably have to end up all related with incest all over the place.
Apparently not, my apologies.
>51293214
Dude, this is just not your day.
You should also add that in Japanese folklore
>humans are little more than cattle and everything eat them regularly because there is plenty of them to go around and real food is precious.
>Emotions are like a force of nature. Humans are stupid assholes that rarely think things straight and react mostly by pure emotions. Strong pent up emotions do serious shit like raise the vengeful dead to haunt or turn people into animals or objects. (or animals into humans)
>Humans in general are submissive as fuck unless you are protagonist or something that generally excepts you from some rules.
>Demons are literally "humans+" they are pretty much the same thing they just do everything better. Demons are generally the stand ins for the asshole high class population that literally owned and treated the people of their land as property.
>Customs and protocol are super important regardless of who you are. The way to escape from being eaten by kappa is to bow before it which it will never never fail to return but that causes it to drop the bowl of water on its head which will cause it to loose its powers.
>The older something is the more important/powerful it gets, there is the belief that if something is old enough it spontaneously gains magic powers and living even more time they become godlike.
>EVERYTHING IS FUCKING WEIRD AND CREEPY.
>Americans natives: no matter what happened, blame coyote for EVERYTHING. If coyote is actually innocent (he is not) then blame everything on a spiders.
Fucking coyote
>Coyote detected
Like the Norse with Loki and giants.
>51294653
Except Coyote has even less morality than Loki. With Loki you can kind of see where he thought he was doing something right, his moral compass just kinda veers every now and then.
Coyote uses a moral compass to club babies because he finds it ironic.
I always found it strange that only Norse gods have a specifically a trickster god which whole existence was to fucking up everyone's shit for shit and giggles. Egyptians got Seth, but he was a death god. I don't really think Greeks had a trickster god. Don't really know about other mythologies though.
>I don't really think Greeks had a trickster god.
Every god pulls that, but Hermes is basically the god of tricky little fucks.
That's not true. Catholicism has always encouraged sex as long as it's between a married couple. And no, not only for the purpose of reproduction. It's even more ridiculous given there were quite a few PROTESTANT sects far more prudish than Catholicism has ever been a couple centuries ago, and they mostly fled to the united states because no one else wanted them
Didn't count if it was anal.
Almost all the greek gods were insane cosmic manchildren. They didn't need a trickster god.
Alright Veeky Forums. Truth time.
Is transformation+zoophilia seen less worse than furry anthro?
Wasn't there some minor Greek goddess of trickery who started the Trojan war? Or was she the god of spite or something?
>Greek gods
Lemme tell you about this guy named loki.
that's eris I think
If you ask me they are both absolutely disgusting but furries are leagues worse because they are actually extremely autistic and vocal about other people respecting their fetish while the other is just quietly disgusting. You could say the people involved has nothing to do with your question but in my opinion it has everything to with it and furries are just outright terrible people.
Goddess of chaos, Eris.
She didn't really do much outside of that as far as I remember
It's less obnoxious.
dude let himself get fucked by a horse to mess with a guy
It was Eris, the goddess of discord, but she and many other gods that were directly named after things were less what we understand as gods and more personifications of concepts. So ares was followed by Eris, Phobos and Deimos, which was just a way to say war brought discord, fear and dread.
>and they mostly fled to the united states because no one else wanted them
You mean were thrown out?
They could have stayed, fought and won their place like any other self respecting religion. Instead they ran like the bitches they are.
They ran when others demanded they stand and fight.
No Eris (the godess of discord) started the torjan war pretty much by accident because she was not allowed into a wedding celebration so she got pissed and threw in the golden apple that was to be give to the "fairest". The whole shit was that Paris, prince of Troy, had to judge between the 3 godesses Hera, Athena, and Aphrodite who each promised a big rewards for him (wisdom, power and the most beautiful woman evr) of course he choose according to his dick. The two loosing goddesses of course decided to ruin his life which over time escalated to the Troyan war.
Technically she did cause the war at its origins but it was not planned by her, it just slowly escalated into the whole thing because greek gods are manipulative assholes and everyone started to fuck around about troy in some way involving many mythical figures.
Oh, and another interesting thing is that Ares was almost never depicted as glorious or great like war gods from many other cultures. That mostly went to Athena, and that's more because she wasn't a war goddess per se as her domain in that regard was strategy, martial prowess and heroic deeds rather than literally reigning over war like Ares.
Speaking of Hermes, is he the only dedicated god of travelers? I'm admittedly not the greatest of scholars, but I can't seem to find any others that fill that role. There are a few that get it tacked on because a group wants to say that their god is in charge of everything good or helpful, but it's just a footnote to them.
Seth was not a death god. Youre confusinh him with either Anubis or Osiris.
Yeah, Ares the "god of war" was at best a shitty and incompetent Saturday morning cartoon villain god. He was dumb as fuck, barely did anything and most just pushed him around and he couldn't do much about it because he was low tier.
If you're a god who can shapeshift into anything and you don't really have a normal form, would you be a furry?
Why not both?
Also most of the furry hate is because the community is frequently cancer.
Which is less and more true now as it's grown so fucking HUGE over the years.
It's just a group of people with a predisposition to knots and immaturity.
Fuck, they may as well be boys scouts.
Ares is the guy in the trenches, and the bullets in the trenches, and the trenches themselves; ugly, brutish and dangerous, and destroys everything around them.
Athena is the generals and the politicians and the proud leaders who smile and shove around those who actually fight and remain gleaming and pristine and gets praised for her beauty and intelligence.
It's not surprising the greeks praised the second and not the first. Keeping soldiers down and leaders praised and beyond reproach is important for most cultures.
Dude, Hermes wore more hats than the Jagermonsters. There's even a version of him called Hermanubis because the Egyptians likened him to a grim reaper figure.
But yeah. That is a good question. I'm sure there must be a few in Far East mythology; those dudes have gods and spirits fire everything.
Tezcatlipoca is the reason 3/4 of the previous worlds before our own ended. He got pissy when he was deposed as the first sun so he had jaguars eat the world, he turned all the humans of the second into monkeys because they were too decadent, the third was destroyed in fire by Tlaloc which wasn't the Smoking Mirror's fault, and the fourth ended because he was so mean to Calchiutlicue who was that era's sun she drowned the world in tears.
Our own world is supposed to end in jaguars and earthquakes and eagles so I bet he's involved somehow too
There is also Hermes Trismegitus who was the result of egyptians combining Thoth and Hermes. Some texts, mainly the Corpus Hermeticum, are atributted to Hermes Trismegitus and as such you can STILL find occultists who revere him
This is most likely a result of the fact our myths we get are mostly from Athenian tradition who had a very obvious reason to not color him well.
Greek gods knew beast was the patrician's fetish.
As I recall, wasnt this because he was the city god of Sparta or something, who preferred oral traditions to writing shit down? And thus all the stories left of him are from rival city states who naturally have no interest in making him badass.
>Our own world is supposed to end in jaguars and earthquakes and eagles
That sounds like a pretty metal apocalypse
actually Set was the god of the desert, storms, and foreigners
Bob Dylan plz
Ares' cult literally had a ritually involving sacrificing a puppy, he was not a nice god
I also forgot the tzitzimime star demons, monstrous women who want to descend from the star where they're held at bay by the sun's power and eat us all.
Also the protectors of pregnant women which is kind of nice, but seriously not enough to make up the star monster hunger thing
Hey, that puppy is the way to victory.
but still, when demanding sacrifices what kind of god tells his followers that they have to kill puppies
The kind who is being nice to not demand the ritual drowning of crying children like some other gods.
What's with the snake dick hanging out of her dress?
...
Because they come from pregnant women. In that pregnant women during certain bad omen times, like the ends of the year and the New Fire ceremony every 52 (the end of the Aztec century) when the tzitzimime/tzitzimitl were able to walk the earth (sometimes) they could just spontaneously turn into star monsters. The snake is the also-turned monster baby hanging out of her womb
For everyone's safety they were locked in grain silos until the period passes. If they transform, they vanish to the stars where the rest of their kin are. The moral of the story is if you want to have kids, get knocked up AFTER the start of a new year to avoid this risk.
>America was founded by people who were running from a lack of religious persecution
You can't make this shit up.
Hermes was pulling pranks within hours of his birth, stealing his brother Apollo's livestock and killing them to make musical instruments with. Unlike Loki he was never particularly malicious though
It wasn't just to mess with the guy, it was so the rest of the Aesir could welch on the bet they made with the owner of said horse. And they kinda made Loki do it, because it was him who made the stupid bet in the first place as part of another scheme
Yeah you can make that up, because it's made up.
Hades wasnt a perv
The only reason he went after Persephone is because Aphrodite was all pissy he didnt have a love interest and therefore she had no pull with him, so she had cupid shoot him with one of those arrows
Psychopomp was one of Hermes main hats, even in Greek religion part of his job was guiding the souls of the dead down to the river Styx so they could cross into hades. He was very much not grim though or much of a reaper - he wasn't death itself, just the guide that showed you where to go next.
The greeks were also pretty grown up about Gods and stuff, so they came to the conclusion that the gods of other people were basically just the same as theirs, just given funny names because foreigners are weird like that. There was quite a strong interplay between hellenesitc and egyptian culture, so you find lots of the gods getting double names like that, Zeus-Amon and things like that
Then when he got back, having literally taken one for the team, he found that the others had just killed the guy.
Hades and Hephaestus are some of the only reasonable Olympians
You aren't actually that far off the mark for Ancient Greece, but how the fuck did you get that out of the greeks not liking Ares?
Hestia was pretty boss too; I don't know of any myths where she out and out is a cunt to people, despite being related to Zeus "Goose-cock to the pussy" and Poseidon "Lemme just rape this chick in her goddesses temple".
Though IIRC she wasn't technically an Olympian. She just got to chill by the fire and make snide comments at the manchildren.
Patrician Goddess, 10/10, would worship again