How do I roleplay this wizard?

How do I roleplay this wizard?

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You don't "roleplay" meme characters.

Some wizards spit in the face of the gods.
That guy shits in his own hands and smears it all over the faces of the gods while shrieking like a baboon.

There's your roleplay.

How would we know how you roleplay him, we're not, uh, telepathic.

that's a druid, surely?

A druid wouldn't wear penguins on his feet.

Not him but i don't know how i missed that.

I'd rather you roleplay that cute. grumpy fighter, OP. Then I could take you someplace quiet and show you my system mastery, if you catch my drift.

>you meet a cute, grumpy fighter
>take her someplace quiet
>she dispels the illusion and turns into a wizard with penguins on his feet

Can I coup de grace myself?

>the texture on her left arm

god damn it the application was fine everywhere else but just there in particular it's too obvious you took a chain link texture and placed it on her arm. fuck that bothers me.

Goblin from early Black Company, basically.

Your subconsciousness tried to protect you.

Did you notice the dick runes on his hat?

This image gets better the longer you look.

don't forget that he's also sitting on a dead spider, has a octupus stuffed into his belt and a dozen spiders crawling around his fanny pack. He's also barfing into a mug made out of a zombie head. That picture is just awesome. From far away everything looks sort of gross but if you take a moment it's "What the fuck did I just see".

That's basically 1 charisma and proud of it.

Never can go wrong with youtube.com/watch?v=3Oe7Q8OCm5I

heh, nice one

Not just any octopus, it's a dire blue ring octopus.

>He's also barfing into a mug made out of a zombie head
He's drinking it.

Just play Rick from Rick and Morty except explain everything through magic.

Go to walmart at 3am to study real life examples

>drinking from the skull of a demi-lich
>sitting on the corpse of a dire-arachnid
>boots made from devil-penquins from the frozen layer of Stygia
>immature Elder Brain strapped to his waist as a trophy

Clearly, this wizard is an ancient and powerful luminary, to be respected and obeyed. Tell this soldier-tart to go back to her post.

When you grow powerful enough to be fully independent from the society, it's only natural to stop giving a fuck about the social conventions. Why should you bother making a good impression when you get anything you need with a spell?

I always thought that the giant spider was his familiar.

>Tell this soldier-tart to go back to her post.

She's just an illusion made to entertain himself.

That's actually a pretty great way to go about it.

You're a jaded old cynic who can literally alter the universe at his whim. You know the pointlessness of everything, and succumb to rampant alcoholism.

It just can't hand his alcohol and always passes out long before wizard even starts singing.

>Wizard chucks another pint of ale
>"Girl... I have met with Lolth on a therapy session, I have talked to Demogorgon while he was doing his hair, I have seen Pun-Pun up close and personal, so shut up and allow me to drink in peace. All your problems will go away in a couple of hundred years"

I dunno. Are you considered helpless against yourself?

Most people are.

Those aren't dick runes, that's Hydrogen and the time keeping method based there on.

Why isn't the grass growing around him? Seems to be a vibrant forest, and everywhere else has a thick bed of grass. First time I noticed this.

>sitting on a dead spider
I assumed the spider was alive, but like "eh, fuck it." and laid down a little bit.

Deeeeeep.

That would require playing in a system where magic is actually weird and allows weird shit beyond casting what amounts to a complex ranged attack or buff.