Anyone have any tips on roleplaying as an asshole without being objectively evil?

Anyone have any tips on roleplaying as an asshole without being objectively evil?

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that pic pretty much has you covered I think, just build that character or one like it and you are all set

Give yourself a treshold.
Be loud-mouthed, violent and unpleasant as much as you want, but give yourself a rule (something like "won't kill without provocation) and don't go out of your way to put people in misery.

Abrasive, self-absorbed, and even outright dysfunctional characters are commonplace in just about any RPG.

There are a billion factors which can work for and against a character like this in regards to the group.

My best advice is use this MO: "I look out for number one, but this is not a hard rule".

But what if I don't have a son? A lot of his assholery requires one of those.

I mean, I can still get drunk and attack domestic animals, but it kinda limits my options.

Oh I have no fucking clue who that character is, I just meant that "heavily scarred japanimation shirtless dipshit with tribal designs" is about as assholey as it gets

Role-playing an asshole doesn't mean playing against the group

Jecht from Final Fantasy 10. He's a huge dick, but he eventually learns from his mistakes if he fucks up badly enough, which I guess is what I'm going for.

Also, he later becomes a giant monster and fights an airship.

play a crotchety old man

Don't be malicious. Be rude, self centred and cowardly, but never actively try and fuck people over.
Like, take things without asking, ignore cultural customs, break stuff and refuse to pay for it, but never literally throw someone to the wolves, or burn their house down (on purpose).
It'd be evil to abandon your allies while holding the one thing that could help them. It's assholish to throw it to them and yell "not my problem!" And if you're the only one that can save them, do so, but then use it as justification for your own selfish behaviour.
Assholes insult you, evil people invite violence against you.

Maybe watch some toshiro mifune samurai movies? He often plays a gruff dickhead who is redeemed by his sense of honor or humanity or whatever

This.

Just do the right thing, but be a dick about it. Or demand payment for it.

Final Fantasy: "Throw every plot device you can imagine together and see what sticks."

There's a bunch of different ways to go about it.

For one: more self-interested than altruistic, but doesn't go out of his or her way to screw over other people for his or her benefit. So they wouldn't steal, but they wouldn't give money to a homeless person, either. They're not the most eager to fight the dread conquering warlord, but they care enough about others to not join the warlord's evil army.

Or that they're sort of brusque and abrasive but they still care about other people. Instead of "did you hear something!" they say "shut up." Instead of "stand back, it's too dangerous!" they say "I'll handle this, you'd just fuck it up."

Or they're just kind of a hard-ass. They ensure the party adheres to a strict lights-out no-talking policy when they make camp. They chide other characters for making what they consider extravagant purchases. They keep track of every little thing anyone does wrong (including themselves, to avoid crossing the line into insufferable).

I hate you

God, I wanna touch his hair. Look how soft it looks.

>Your party has encountered: The Cock

HIRRROOOOOOOO

What if Tidus was a pretty Japanese lady?

i don't know, do you wanna find out what Auron looks like as a girl?

I mean, I'm fine with him being a pretty Japanese boy, personally.

If I were to change anything, I'd put him in an outfit that doesn't seem to have been specifically designed to be the worst possible thing you could wear while swimming. What with the baggy shorteralls and the metal glove and the asymmetry and the movement-restriction shoulder pad and the tags hanging off the sleeves and the chain and the belt and the necklace and heavy socks and the layers and the boots.

The water doesn't behave like water, so why should they wear proper swimwear?

It does for the most part. Like, ignore blitzball for a minute and think of all the oceans and lakes in which Tidus et al. swim.

Serve a noble cause. Fight for your values and your friends, and have good instances of the former and good standards for the latter. Work to make the world a better place, without pause.

You got that? Good.

Be the biggest piece of shit on the planet. Use violence as your first solution. Offer sympathy to no one. Flout society's rules, even the ones people like have and adhering to. Wrong people who have not wronged you, in petty ways, nonstop. Swear in front of children. Shit in the roses. Expose yourself on live TV.

Assume the worst about people, but because you do, forgive and accept the faults they'll cop to, because they're only human and you're a fan of humans, on balance. It's the people that seem nice that're the real bastards. That priest questgiver is definitely molesting the choirboys, and while you can't prove it (YET) you can still give him the stinkeye.

...

They move through it way too easily, and can control their movements too precisely. It doesn't have any substance.

Also, you can breathe underwater.

Then why does Tidus have to catch his breath after surfacing at Baaj?

>Throw another player in the way of a sword
>Chaotic GOOD

??????

they don't breathe underwater, they can just hold their breaths for a really long time. its their bodies that are different, not the water. see, how they can also change their depth under water and not suffer any consequences from it

It's Felicia Day.

I mean, they can survive being shot 20 times. Is it that hard to imagine they've got swim bladders?

Beats me, but no one needed to surface during that 10 minute underwater boss fight when they were crossing Lake Shoopuf.

Freedivers can hold their breath underwater--while active--for like 20 minutes.

I once played as a mercenary in a party of do-gooder types. It tended to involve a lot of arguing when I talked to quest givers about the price while the others were ready to just leap into action, no questions asked.

youtube.com/watch?v=79DijItQXMM

Was he really an asshole? He seemed more like an insecure drunkard scared of his son.

You would not kill or harm people on a whim.
You would not abandon your friends.
But besides you got your own set of priorities that you'll happily pursuit regardless of circumstances.

Have good intentions and moral qualms.

...that's it.

Think of the biggest jackass you know who you wouldn't call evil. Play them.

For most my friends, that's me.
I'm loud, straightforward, foul-mouthed, sarcastic, and never afraid to laugh at somebody's screw ups.
But I can also laugh at myself, and often do. At the end of the day, if someone I know needs the shirt off my back, a place to sleep, or even the food off my plate, they know all they have to do is ask, and I've been asked a few times.

Lesbian Alucard is great, certainly fits the "Murder & Wenching" player type.

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