ITT: One sentence GM advice

read it first tho

>Few planned encounters work out as you planned
>The best rails are those that are player created
>Remember the three names of GMing; Schodinger, Chekov, and Samus.
>Remain flexible, until you can't

Run at least one session where you just make everything up as you go.

always make up everything as you go

Prep a lot of generic NPCs, maps, etc. while limiting the more specific prep you need to do for any given session.

Do other people really do this? I always felt like I was doing something wrong because it's my preferred method of GMing.

>never accept handstuff as payment for GM favours, mouth or no deal

So, always listen to a guy from Veeky Forums?

You can't do something wrong if you and your group enjoy it

Thanks man

...

>If you're not enjoying the game, tell the group you want to stop.

>Never pay more than $20 for a videogame

...

>no matter how good it will feel, killing them just isn't worth it

What, your GM doesn't dole out general life advice?
Weak.

>don't be afraid to railroad if the players don't start moving on their own

>Light ambience music or video game music is great!

>don't be afraid to "call in sick" whenever the GM decides to start railroading your party

>If you put enough rail, the players won't see them

>

>Don't be afraid to say no to your players

>There is the rule of cool, but also the cool of rule.

>Also don't be afraid to say yes, yes but and no but

Rolled 87 (1d100)

>You either play or run, DMPCs are for faggots

>never play d&d (and clones, smartass), not if or why. just never do it

i don't like d20 games either but some people enjoy it and you shouldn't tell that they're having badwrongfun

>Players are dime a dozen, don't hesitate to cull the awkward, the disruptive and the latecomers.

>Play with friends, not with idiots

>Focus on the what not the when, if your players go around something cool you had planned just reintroduce it later.

>Have friends.

>implying your friends aren't idiots

That's really questionable advice. I've seen plenty of DMs whine about bad players whom the refuse to dispose of because >muh friend

If you can't talk about anything with your friend they're only aquaintances and no friends
get better friends then
make friends with other gamers and hope those aren't idiots.

>calm down

>implying I'm not an idiot as well

>If your group is having fun then your technique is irrelevant, you're doing it right.

>If your group isn't having fun then your technique is irrelevant, you're doing it wrong.

If your technique is how they are having fun, why is it irrelevant?

I think the intent was to say that it's irrelevant if your technique is "incorrect" if everybody's having a good time.

>Veeky Forums GMs are the worst you'll find, don't take GM advice from Veeky Forums

user, just because they are your friends and you can talk to them doesn't mean they will listen to you or change their shitty ways.
Your equivalency is demonstrably false.

yeah but it does mean I can kick them the fuck out and don't have a bad feeling because they can understand.

A not shitty player can understand if they are not gelling with the group or the game, being friends just makes it awkward because most of the time they subscribe to the "geek fallacies".
I had to boot my roommate out of my group, and shit got weird with him for a while.

the only shit I relate
Session start in 10 minute
Not fully prepared
I poured a lot of rhum in my coffee to keep me strong

DOES NOT COMPUTE

>No campaign plan survives contact with the characters.

>Between sessions, always ask "What are the antagonists doing?"
>Never plan for a specific PC
>You're a player, too. If GMing feels too much like work for you, see what can help you enjoy it again
>Random tables are never a bad option when you're stuck for ideas

>Never plan for a specific PC

What?

>Do not plot to render a single pc obsolete, it is fun for nobody

>Always prepare a few spare statblocks jut in case

Ahh, right, I didn't get that from the context. I was thinking you were arguing against having plot elements or hooks tuned to specific PCs etc

>random encounter tables make everyone's life easier

Different user than the one in , he probably meant exactly what you initially thought.
I changed it to actually useful advice.

>Learn how to do a screen wipe.

Seriously, a lot of GMs will drag you through each minute bit of travel or exploration (I realized this a while ago in myself)

I have this problem, please elaborate.

>never cater to a single specific player
Happened two times to me as player, one time because the GM really wanted to bang that girl in our group (he didn't bang her in the end but tries for like 5 years now) and once the gm wrote an adventure just for one character of the group and had the rest forcefully put into that.

I admit, I'm guilty of this. I want the players to feel that sense of traveling, like in Tolkien, but it grinds everything to a crawl.

Oh! And some advice.
>if you want to railroad, give the illusion of choice

>If the player characters have their own goals, don't block them - roll with them.

From my experience as a player, unless the travel itself is important or could be interrupted by an encounter that inhibits the progress, go ahead and allow a scene transition to the desired location..

>It's not your world, don't describe every single bit of a monster, building or npc, give the most important details and let the players imagination do the rest

Never let a minute long description halt the game

GM advice, as in advice to GMs, or advice from GMs?

If former
>don't underestimate them. If you do, they will roll all over you and call it boring. Just try to kill them, it will work out
If the latter
>don't underestimate anything. remember, he's trying to kill you

Those are examples of doing it badly, but individually tuned plot elements are one of the best tools in a GMs arsenal.

The material a player gives you in their background is just as valuable as what's on their sheet, if not more so, for creating connections between them and the world.

I guess in general terms I'd say you should cater to every single, specific player, using their character and background to better link them to the world. Bonus points if you can have a plot element linked to multiple PCs, or tie PC background elements together in interesting ways.

don't cater to a single player or a single pc, cater to the group is what I wanted to say

>talk things out with your players, ask them what they want and what they like

Basically, it's this. Extensive, uneventful travel like in LotR is fun to read. However, it's not really fun as a player/it's a lot harder to convey in the sense of a tabletop game.

If you're going on a five day journey, get the party to make a general watch order and campsite layout, and just describe the whole journey in one go: don't stop every day (unless they're fighting every day). Similarly, say you're doing Starwars. Unless there's a very good reason, have the entire hyperspace journey plotted with one check.

You don't have to describe the PCs walking through each district for the eleventh time, just say
"You step out of the palace onto the bustling streets, and arrive in front of the Blue Gate within fifteen minutes."

Sprinkle a little bit of all PC's specialties into the game.
Some undead for the cleric to turn.
An angry bouncer for the character who use diplomacy.
A broken vase for the wizard who picked the mending spell.
Makes everybody feel useful for picking the skills and abilities they did.

I'd still somewhat disagree. Always trying to have every plot hook appeal equally to each player locks off a lot of options.

It's okay for one character to be the focus of an arc every now and again, as long as you put the work in to make sure the rest are engaged and having fun with their own stuff to do alongside.

If you're returning to one characters home town, of course the story there is going to be more personal and have greater significance to them, but that doesn't stop the town and the story surrounding it also holding things of relevance to the rest of the group, even if it's not on the same level as the homecoming PC.

never said equally, but keep the rest in mind

>Fuck the Police

So is power metal, anime music, electronic music, jazz, old school hip hop, rococo ballroom music, reggae, German military marches, Russian prison songs and Mongolian throat singing. All in one sesion. If your players don't like it, it's their fault, find other players.

>Sufficient prep work allows you to ad-lib and improvise more confidently and effectively when you need to.

>Don't worry about realism.

That's only true for combat-centric games.

If you see that certain players deliberately undermine the game, kick them out without any discussions, voting or second chances. The others will thank you later.

Yes

It's not even true for most combat centric games

>Occasionally audit the PCs' sheets; not just to check for cheating, but to see what the party is capable of. Then design around that.

If your players cheat at your game, maybe you're doing something wrong. Or your players really hate the idea of not being perfect. Failed rolls shouldn't be something to be afraid of.

Players cheating is almost exclusively a shitty player problem, not a GM one.

Fun is the byproduct of playing the game.

Here a list of advice:
>don't be afraid of lists, list of names, places, races, countries, languages, these can all be of great help while improving
>keep a small list of generic encounters that can be adapted to the situation, it's better than having you pin down rules on the spot
>while your players should have agency and direction don't let players just shit all over what you want to do, you're there to have fun too

So here is some advice for something I do.

I come to the game table with an idea in mind of the kind of game I want to run, the story I want to tell, and the like. I advertise this when I start the game and am forthcoming. More often than not I find players with the "fuck your story" attitude or generally just wanting to go off and do something. While they're not generally bad people you shouldn't bend over backwards for them. I normally ask these people to leave the group and find folks who want to play the story I wanted to tell.

It's better to remove players and preserve your fun than to stop having fun for the sake of people you hardly know. Too many GMs, especially semi-experienced GMs have the attitude of the GM is subservient to the players beaten into them.

>Anything can be a mount as long as it can carry you

This. My DM on average spent about 3 minutes describing what we were looking at. Just tell me it's an antechamber, what you're describing is an antechamber!

>The players are not you, for better and worse.

>When in doubt, kill them all.

But that means taking that very advice with a pinch of salt, which means taking the advice to take advice with a pinch of salt with a pinch of salt, which means you shouldn't necessarily take it with a pinch of salt, which means oh no I've gone cross-eyed.

My last description was this:

>From between vines and cracked porcelain of the dilapidated fountain a massive serpentine body pulls itself forward. Nearly forty feet of it are visible with the end of it topped with a human shaped skull the size of a beachball. The skull is smooth and featureless save for a gaping human mouth. The body is entirely covered in soft white fur. Two small three fingered hands work constantly, twiddling its thumbs as its teeth gnash. When it opens to speak it sounds like the clack of wood forming into speech.

If I had described it as a huge serpent it wouldn't have been enough. A serpent with a human head it wouldn't have been enough. So what should I have done.

Common sense helps

are you autistic?

Very poignant. I had to stop my last game because I realized I would rather write stories in my setting than have people play in it.