What's Veeky Forums's thoughts on ninja?

Best taste.

The polite term is "people of subterfuge"

delet this!

ninja girls a best

But we already have a name for those!

They're called the french, get it right

Holy fuck watch your language

Watermarks, truly the most fiendish of methods for a ninja to hide behind

>t. le rosbif eternel

Ok I chuckled.

There is no such thing as Ninja because no one would do something so heinous and dishonorable as stab someone in the back without offering them a proper fight or challenge.

I guess thieves don't exist either.

You think it is the ninja who is hiding behind them, but little do you realize it is you who is trapped behind them from him.

They're fine as long as they don't spit fire or win direct confrontations. Knives in the night and spies are the only way to go.

Prefer rogues.

Ninja Master Gordon is my hero.

youtube.com/watch?v=n0hTr_ITdP0

Underrated post.

Defeats vikings, but dies to pirates.

This, best post

But who would win?

c There are few good hiding place on a coastline that can withstand a combination of explosive shells and grapeshot, which puts the ninja at a substantial disadvantage versus pirates.

Depends how many there are - the scaling on pirates and ninja are weird - unless it's at a temple or dojo or something, once you go past about 10 ninja they just become mooks and a liability, where pirates scale pretty much linearly

100 ninjas will always beat 100 pirates in battle. In fact, 100 ninjas will always beat 200 pirates, but will never beat 300 pirates.

>including space pirates
Ninja don't stand a chance.

Richard Harrison is the best ninja.

youtube.com/watch?v=A4enmeIdMdg

Depends on whether we're talking about ninjas or Naruto-esque "ninjas."
The former is a bit overdone, but I don't mind them generally, while the latter is absolutely insufferable.

>unless it's at a temple or dojo or something, once you go past about 10 ninja they just become mooks
I'd go one step further.
If it's at a temple or dojo IF the ninja are defending then they're pretty much all guaranteed to be mooks. But yeah, ninjas reliability is certainly inversely proportionate to their numbers.

Also consider realistic ninjas were mostly about subterfuge. Unless the pirate attack is completely random and sudden, chances are there's gonna be a few ninjas aboard the pirate ship(s), and suddenly bashing the captain's head in with a cannonball lying around is going to throw the ship into confusion.

Oh my a ninja thread.

youtube.com/watch?v=pBMZkk1OCyw

Yes, this is an actual movie. It's called Ninja 3 Domination

Why would killing the captain cause confusion? It just means the first mate is acting captain until the crew holds an election.
It's true it might shatter their morale, but at the same time it also might make 'em furious.

I'd say assume a black morphsuited nip rather than the 'write about a wizard and call them a ninja' shit. Or possibly Ninja Gaiden's 'usually uses katanas but occasionally pulls out a scroll and starts chucking fireballs' shtick.

invincible and certainly better than pirates

>invincible and certainly better than pirates

>invincible

Lemme guess, you just slice the incoming cannonballs in half with your masterwork katana, and duck in between the shrapnel from the explosion? And of course regular bullets just bounce off your massive weeaboo complex.

Only if it's a single ninja. As soon as a few more show up they start dropping like flies.

True. Though you can kill a lone ninja, I've seen it happen in movies. It seems to depend a lot on who he is and what his goals are. If he wants to steal a mystical artifact you'll have to tangle with him a few times, but he'll go down eventually. If he wants vengeance, though, look out.
Basically if you slaughter a clan of ninjas, you need to be really sure you don't miss any. If you miss one because he's hiding or out fetching water or something, he'll swear vengeance against you, and at that point he becomes functionally invincible, and you're doomed.

In a one-on-one situation the only sure way to kill a ninja is with another ninja. Going the Ninja v Ninja route dispenses with all the normal rigamaroll to kill a ninja.

Why is pirates vs ninjas a thing, anyway?

It's one of those "lolsorandom" things from the earliest days of the internet.

Yeah, back when Veeky Forums was SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS instead of trying to be serious all the time. Nowadays nobody can take a joke, least of all here on Veeky Forums.

Because nerds enjoy arguing silly hypotheticals. Pirates v Ninjas v Knights and/or Vikings was a popular one.

If nothing else, I know that ninjas shall perish.

Actually the idea seems to predate even the birth of the web. This game is from Atari back in 1989, and features a whole level vs ninjas.

Nah, 100 ninjas is too many.

Yeah, I miss it honestly. People didn't have a stick up their ass all the damn time.

>have argument with DM about whether strength or dexterity is better
>DM is huge dexfag
>party is camping outside
>middle of the night have to roll spot check
>fail
>hear some bustling in the bushes
>go to investigate
>nothing there
>suddenly a robed figure drops down behind me
>whispers in my ear
>''dex > strength''

Can you beat my best score?

foddy.net/Ninjas.html

Man, don't get me fucking started on Space Pirates
This is a goddamn space pirate ship that singlehandedly crippled the navy of a major galactic power before devastating the planet proper.

This is assuming the pirates are generic pirates with no names or faces. If even a minor captain with a name shows up, then Pirates win no matter what. However, if the number of ninjas is at or below 10, the ninjas win unless there's countless hordes of pirates led by a single warlord.

Of course, if you manage to achieve the perfect balance between the two, you achieve the Pirate/Ninja Paradox. An event that fundamentally breaks the universe until it is resolved.

That show was stupid in all the right ways.

They taste better after you peel off the clothes and shurikens.

Oni get out

Dammit, I need to read through Dr. McNinja again.

Well, instead of it happening in some random backwater shoreline that overwhelmingly favours seafaring ships, we set it in a port town. In terms of justification, maybe this is a regular plunder stop for the pirates and the town decided to hire some muscle. Or maybe this is town is oppressed by it's ninja landlords and the pirates caught wind of it.

Now we ask what pirates and ninjas we're talking about. Is the straw hat crew getting all up in the hidden leaf? Are these just the people of these professions? The most phenomenal of the associated myths?

Since I like this stuff I'll tell you what I think happens to otherwise normal people. There's a lot of little scuffles basically everywhere, and because it comes to light the ninja are pretending to be townsfolk, there's heavy civilian casualties. The pirates sail off the victor, due to simply having access to guns. Their crew now has an unknown amount of ninjas in it though, which probably winds up with them all sinking out at sea.

you see, you only thought what you were firing canonballs at were ninjas. when in fact, it was your own ship.

problem, blackbeard?

What he said

If you know it was ninja, your GM did something wrong

Literally the perfect mook. Masked to dehumanize them, a wide variety of tricks they can utilize, uniformed so you can tell whose side they're on, sneaky enough that you can justify putting them just about anywhere, and unlike robots that pop like red paintballs if you hit them hard enough showering everyone around you in high pressure gore.

A god damn beautiful mook.

>uniformed so you can tell whose side they're on
The fuck?

I always ask the question of whether or net they fit into a given setting/story.

They are okay though. I prefer mine a little more like bandits who are idolized by the populace due to them being the only people ballsy enough to stick it to the nobles but in reality being little more than some thugs who prefer wealthier targets.

How that even makes them ninjas anymore? Serious and sincere question

Sauce

Whoever wins, we win.

But what about...space ninja?

But how badly disadvantaged are the pirates if they're forced to venture inland?

Both will fall to my ultimate mook: The Draco-Cyborg-Vampire-Pirate-Ninja-Spartan-Viking With mint

But you gotta make sure they completely do not know one another. If they are friends, they team up. If they are sworn enemies, there's the 'Power of Friendship' random factor. And you know what's worse than a lone ninja? A back-to-back duo of ninjas.

Finally, even if your hired ninja and your enemy ninja do not know each other, be honest with your hired one, lest he/she team up with your target because 'muh betrayal demands payment'.

Old and busted

Secret Agents where the new game at

Why Patchouli is dressed like Reimu?

Ninja and spy/assassin enemies in general can be tricky in my opinion.

Nothing can frustrate players more than an invisible, seemingly all-knowing opponent who can pull hit and runs without issue.

But players playing as a ninja is something different.

I also tend to like my ninja fairly grounded.

Any magical shit is going to be the boarderline stuff like where they really do seem to vanish into darkness and/or seemingly teleport (but only relatively short distances and if a person ends up distracted). And ultimately their best skill is dressing up as someone of no consequence and discreetly poisoning you.

What you're thinking of is the Inverse Ninja Law or the Law of Conservation of Ninjutsu: tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ConservationOfNinjutsu

You really only want one ninja. If you just have one, all the available ninjutsu will be concentrated in that one ninja, and he'll be super powerful. Dividing up the ninjutsu over 100 ninjas makes them too weak individually.

To all the contrarian faggots

In Japanese folklore loads of supernatural abilities were attributed to Shinobi.

Many legends include flight, invisibility, shapeshifting, the ability to "split" into multiple bodies, the summoning of animals, and control over the five classical elements.

Fuck outta here with your westernized bullshit

>HURR anyone who ever does magic must fit the archetype of a european wizard

For me it's less that "magical can only be done by wizards" and it's more because I originally grew up on Naruto and quickly became bored of the super-power wizard ninja.

I wanted intrigue, suspense, and mystery. I wanted 'magical' elements to be left vague and uncertain as to whether they were magic or clever cons.

But secret agents are ninja though. Just wearing tuxedos instead of kabuki stage-hand outfits.

Is that I-Am-Ninja in the corner? That's probably by and far the most obscure reference in the whole pic.

So run a game where it's ambiguous

Sheesh

If people can happily play a game set in Dark Ages Britain without magic swords, dragons, and wizards then you can play realistic ninjas no problem

All I've got to say on the matter is stabbing drunken nobles in their sleep and carrying forbidden love letters between geisha and korean ambassadors is boring

I'm fine as long as they are spies scouts saboteurs and occasional assassins and wear civilian clothes rather than cheesy martial artists in black pajamas.

What the fuck is Johnny doing there, he's a cowboy samurai.

He's also a pirate, you know.

To be honest by most definitions it doesn't. I just kinda like bandits whose robbing of the rich gets misinterpreted by the lower classes as some kind of great act when to the bandit it is just another day of work.

Not to say I don't like the peasant by day stealthy killer with strange tools by night ninja. They just are not my favorite.

As far as magic ninjas go I'm not too enthusiastic about the concept since them just being normal people who trained like hell and wish to overthrow oppressive nobles seems cooler to me.

I like the idea that every culture has ninjas but the Japanese ones are the least proficient and that's why we are only sure that THEY exist.

Plural: Excellent cannon fodder.
Singular: Excellent waifu material.

When you strip away the mysticism and weeb shit, pretty damn cool.

Japanese things are weeb shit

Holy fuck you're a genius

You don't understand how powerlevel math works

1000 ninjas will lose to 100 pirates.
But 10 ninjas will defeat the 100 pirates.

>tfw people will never recognize that assassins creed and dishonored protagonists are basically reskinned ninjas
>tfw western/mid-east ninjitsu will not become a pop culture thing in the near future

In a high fantasy setting they're cool. Superhuman magic spy assassins are neat however they are flavored, so long as you aren't especially stupid about it.

In more realistic settings they (and most spy types) are awfully boring.

Weeb Shit, not allowed in my games

Go be Naruto elsewhere

>spend years practicing a single kick and repeat it up to a million times
Wouldn't that just throw out his knee after a while and give him a really shitty limp?

How does one do Pirates in a game without them turning into ocean themed rogues/thieves?

>How does one do Soldiers in a game without turning them into army themed fighters

I always considered Naruto ninjas to be along the same lines of how modern writers invent just any damn thing they want and call it a vampire. Regardless of it ever being at all like any vampire in media history.

>If played as an assassin
Cool.
>If played as a kung fu assassin
Cool.
>If played as a kung fu assassin with some minor magic powers
Cool.
>If played as a kung fu assassin with major magic powers
No.
>If not played as an assassin at all
Fuck off.

...

>80's manga counts as ancient mythical texts guys!!