Your romantic interest must be within one step of your alignment

Source? Please tell me it isn't a doujin!

>#1.b
I thought that was a universal rule regardless of crazy, was I wrong?

>Your friends must be within one step of your alignment

I disagree

it's from boku girl

How did we elect this nigger? What kind of psychopath eats pizza crust-first?

Well, better safe than sorry.

Wait, so if I'm LG, and my romantic interest is CE, does that make one of us secretly good, secretly bad, or is there an alignment shift incoming?

>CG(CN in season 2) and CN with Evil tendencies
Seems fine to me.

No user, opposites attract. Your love interest must be within one step of the opposite of your alignment.

Somebody starring in an advertisement for pizza with stuffed crusts?

I'm waking up in Cheeto dust, my belly's covered in pizza crust...

>Be a Neutral Good (usually) fellow.
>Some crazy person started raising undead and the like.
>Help local militia put down the undead.
>sneak into the idiot necromancers lair.
>It's a woman.
>Doesn't matter, still a necromancer.
>Tackle, Grapple, Pin and Restrain. Try casting now, novice.
>Takes her to the guard and she is put in prison.
>Finds out later that she broke out and gets asked to track her down again.
>Track her to her new lair.
>Repeat above. Except she moans erotically when I'm in the middle of restraining her.
>Moment of awkward silence. Ask her what's wrong without thinking.
>She admits that she was turned on by how rough I was with her last time and broke out because she knew they'd send me after her again. Offers up her body to me.
>sweatdrop.gif Haven't gotten some since that night with the Mayor's daughter in the barn a decade ago.
>Fade to black.
>Is now in a weird relationship where she plays the villain, I play the hero and I track her down and "subdue her" before she "gets away yet again".

20 Years later she keeps escalating the scenarios. Now she's raising undead armies and she's got this weird locket she won't let out of her sight and the monarchy is sending adventuring parties after her.

HelpImDatingALich.jrpg

If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you son. I've got 99 problems but a Lich ain't one.

No, fortunately, or maybe, unfortunately, my character impregnated her before she got the idea of escalating it to the point where she "accidentally a war". Ended up retiring that character after he managed to convince her to settle down due to the pregnancy.

They're currently living in a cabin that he built himself on the outskirts of a village and make a living as the local problem-solver. Playing their kid in our current game, taking place about twenty years later. :)

>The chaotic evil sorceress is madly in love with the lawful good paladin
>His devotion to absolute good and justice only arouses her even more
>She sees his attempts to cleave and smite as agressive flirting

Okay Carlos, you got me good enough to want to save it for prosperity

Clap.webm
I suppose this means that the LG are therefore doomed to be forever alone.

>HelpImDatingALich.jrpg
Is that a problem? Friendly reminder that a lich -a powerful wizard by definition- has no reason not to have a THICC MEATY BODY.

Well that doesn't make any kind of sense.

>be chaotic good
>love interest is lawful evil
>she has no interest in me

I'm posting this on Veeky Forums but I'm actually an emotional basket-case right now.

>be chaotic good
Apply yourself
>love interest is lawful evil
Your love interest is shit and probably a slut too
>she has no interest in me
Get swole, smite evil, find a nice LG companion!

My greentext got screencapped. Yay.

Only because the pun is only as funny as it was in context.

Don't let it go to your head. B-baka

twice my friend because i did too.. wan to play this as a character concept one day!

>it's different, so it's wrong
>not eating pizza the way of true patricians
I'll bet you like burning your mouth on cheese and then leaving the crusts because they've gotten cold

Eating pizza this way ensures you eat every component of it at it's optimum temperature for consumption

Except, obviously, for being a skeleton user.

She'd obviously still be a skeleton behind all that meat just like you

You can't dip the crust effectively if it's still attached to the rest of the slice, dumbfuck.

You sound fat.

That seems reasonable. Anything greater is just too different, and will create too much conflict.

Not the corners, which are strictly superior to all other alignments.

Lawful Good Paladin and Chaotic Neutral Rogue is patrician though, OP. Are you high?

Reading this gave me autism, and then cancer.

I hope you learned from your suffering

noone really considers the temperature radius on a pizza slice until it's too late

ah muh palibro.
>Apply yourself
come no man, telling people how to be isn't very good, you smite EVIL you don't prevent people from being evil or this case being edgy.
>Your love interest is shit and probably a slut too
Lawful my dude, lawful evil folks don't tend to be sluts, they tend to use relationships as a stepping stone for power or self gratification.
>Get swole, smite evil, find a nice LG companion!
truer words ain't never been spoken

Personally I don't like the crusts because they are flavourless empty carbs and then i remember i'm eating pizza and shouldn't have been doing that in the first place

>not eating crusts
>his pizza crusts are empty carbs

Shittaste and shit pizza bro

My wife is full on Lawful Good and managed to drag me from TN to NG. She's also older than me and extremely maternal. Guess I have mommy issues.

>shit taste maybe
>shit pizza
i don't actually like pizza
I'd take a nice roti over it anyday

>LG
Sorry but I don't want to smash my head with a mace.
>paladin
Sorry ,but I don't want to smash my head with a morningstar and I'm not a weeb

>Not liking pizza
I'd tell you to kill yourself, but clearly you've yet to even live.

>I've yet to live because i don't like pizza
normally the that statement comes after someone says ive never tried X
Curry-Roti is better
fight me

you have shit taste

>shit-tier Malay street food
>superior to pizza

>Malay
West indies version actually
changes from place to place, my cousins make top tier shit back in Jamaica but the cornbread shit is a bit weak.
I also don't like bacon.
pizza, bacon, fucking meme foods, that's it.

Sorry, but 'Chaotic Stupid' =/= 'True Neutral'.

Alright, I'll admit your taste in sauced-up flatbreads isn't absolute shit, but I'm beginning to think you don't like pizza simply because you've never had a good one.

might well be the case.

My wife is True Neutral and periodically awakens the Chaotic Evil core beneath my meticulous Lawful Good facade.

>i dislike bacon because it's a meme food
holy shit you're like some kind of backwards-vegan who can't help but allow others opinions of foods to restrict your available choices

>pfft, that's popular, I ain't eating that

The fuck do you do at parties? Or out drinking?
>hey user, we're all chipping in for a pizza, want in?
>check out these plebs
>2016+1
>eating meme foods
>bet they've never had a delectably gentlemanly Roti
>omg, bacon slices? so META
>my soul hurts

>party bursts into lich's chamber
>shes stark naked, has herself tied up and moans "oh nooo~ you must be such a mighty warrior to have broken past my- oh shit who are you people?"
>someone sprints into the room behind you
>its the fucking governor of a fairly high-standing province
>"ADVENTURERS ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE DONT TELL THE KING"
>after lying directly to the king, your whole party now holds well paid government positions with no actual job responsibility in the province the governor secured for himself
>spend the rest of your life living off of hush money while you basically run a whole town and can do no wrong

alternatively

>your party and the governor all tag-team the lich
>now you constantly go out with the guy to gangbang his FWB and the king wonders how 7 people all can get so close to taking down a lich without ever actually doing anything

>pizza, bacon, fucking meme foods, that's it.

I can't deny that bacon is a meme food but it is very good.

Not him, but that really depends on how thick it's cut, how it's cured, and whether or not it was smoked. I've had some pretty shitty bacon in my day.

Makes thing easy for true neutral.

Oh, look, a discussion that has nothing to do with Veeky Forums and belongs in

it became more about Pizza and less about Trump.

>pizza has nothing to do with Veeky Forums

>no bacon
Do you want to get Islamic radicals? Because that's how you get Islamic radicals.

I lived in America for seven years.

Columbine, 9/11, the theater massacre, and Trump are your punishments for those skiddly bits of nothing you call "bacon".

Aren't all females CN?

Nope. Some are CE.

>Being attracted to women
What are you, gay?

I vaguely recall a canon example of a lich that heavily uses gentle repose to keep herself looking hot

I thought Columbine was our punishment for the leather trench coat fad?

>backwards-vegan
We got a nice place near by that sells philly cheese steaks down here that my brother likes, he came down and what i ate disagrees with that.
>>pfft, that's popular, I ain't eating that
No i only eat pizza at parties, usually any food can be good when shared with good company.
>that shitty greentext
you know I ain't a hipster, I'm from Jamaica.
one of the most popular pizza joints before i left 10 years ago was pizza hut, which is shit by the way.
>bacon slices? so META
the fuck are you on about?
>my soul hurts
No, that's your arteries
>bacon is a meme food but it is very good.
i'll give it credit, there's this place up north that buchers some good meat you know what I'm saying.

user we all know that angering islam creates radicals and that's because terrorism has nothing to do with Islam.
seriously though, i love me some fucking ham,

>that shitty greentext
>the fuck are you on about
>no, that's your arteries
I think you liked my greentext.
>you know I ain't a hipster, I'm from Jamaica
I didn't know either, nor do I now, as they are not true

>Islander
Explains why you've never had a decent pizza.

I don't deny that is likely the case.
the love for pizzahut back in that shit disturbs me
this is why that nation is absolute shit.

Just keep your damn beef patties to yourself.

While Wiz a cute and everything, I'd still smite her and team up with best LG waifu.

don't worry 'bout dat
Most of the ones you find up here are just utter shit man, dry fucking shit.
if Jamaican food isn't mildly moist it doesn't tend to be as good, and up here you have some trinii shit with this weird fucking sweet sauce being peddled as Jamaican food, lods of shit fucking people trying to sell fake food.
go to tastee if you want good shit but it's like chicken nuggets and shit, they grind up the worst parts of the animal, spice it up in the patty's case and sell it.

>choosing the degenerate paladin over Yunyun
I know there's shit taste but damm user you fucked up

>complaining about his shit taste
>aqua a shit
>meguim a loli, a shit and will result in pic related.
>darkness a shit, degenerate who will leave you for the most desgusting, mean and stupid neckbeard she could find.
>yun yun is an annoying yandere austist, will still spend here life obsessing over explosions

but
>lich is nice, thicc
>eris a best

considering the nature of the show, yun yun will challange her to a competition, and through some fuck up you will end up in a relationship with an anthropomorphic explosive some how

>Yunyun
>not shit taste
Dayum son.

All these shit opinions
Aqua is best girl

Wait, y'all are actually talking about waifus? I thought this was a pizza thread.

To be fair the ad was for stuffed crust pizza.

>Chaotic evil
>superior
>Not reserved strictly for maniacs and saturday cartoon villains.

>usually any food can be good when shared with good company

regardless of whatever else they say, this user speaks the truth

>usually any food can be good when shared with good company.

t. has never been forced to eat terrible food cooked by a visiting relative because the rest of the family won't let you be rude.

Hardly, the only reason it's good is because you're yakking so much that you don't eat a bite of the solid bile that your friend who cannot cook threw onto the table.

t. someone whose friends are bad cooks

>tfw CN with CE girlfriend

why is pooh not wearing a shirt

Okay, fair enough, if the food is terrible, it is at best a bonding experience.
But I'd take mediocre food with my friends over great food alone any day.
Good thing real life isn't so black-and-white

He's a fucking bear.

Why aren't you?

Disney gave him a shirt. Classic Pooh didn't wear shit because he was a goddamn teddy bear.

Because he's in the middle of Log-N-Chill with piglet, duh

Fuck off, Aqua. Everyone knows it's you.